neutered vampire

"comrade in arms" yeah i bet he was in your arms. every night. fruit

No I think it's really great when a friend group of approximately twenty seven individuals spread out in the sidewalk as they walk so nobody has to walk behind the group. There's nothing better than when I'm trying to get home and I see the tableau of Jesus at the Last Supper gliding towards me like Jamiroquai in the Virtual Insanity music video and I have to decide who has the narrowest frame that I can shoulder-check my way past

@putting-swears-back-in-images

pet play but its with insects

oh yeah baby youre my sexy little deer fly

Whatever. Cum my scarab.

reminder to all disabled people that you’re allowed to tell people “i can’t do that” about stuff you can ‘technically’ do but which harms you or requires a period of recovery or preparatory rest etc. you don’t have to explain the complex nuances of your condition to anybody who demands it. i’ve found it’s honestly better to give the least amount of info about your symptoms unless you trust a person a lot. you hold the power over your health information. you choose whether or not to share the details of your condition with people who might not understand.

Did you hear a new love language just dropped? yeah its crazy. Its called just fuckin biting them.

reblogging this but shaking my head the whole time to show i don't believe in love languages

using the traffic light system during a kink scene but shaking my head the entire time so the audience knows i dont support car-dependant infrastructure and its influence on the common vocabulary

through pottery we domesticated rocks

the replacement of websites with apps sounds so backwards when you actually describe it. like hmm you have to download an entire program onto your device each time you want access to a portal, where it takes up storage indefinitely. somebody should invent an app where you can "browse" any portal just by typing in its address... 🥴

"we detected a mature post" yeah I'm in my 30s

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek