Young, dumb, and full of Existential Dread

The only reason I'm not a dad is because I'm a woman and I don't have children. Other than that

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

Thinking about a new bit where i start using “workers of the world” as my go-to second person plural pronoun. Like “chat”.

Workers of the world what do we think of this. Is it funny.

Workers of the world please like and reblog my post

got an ad on instagram for a group of beatles impersonators that hire out for events and all the comments were asking if they hired them would the paul and john kiss

I shall prepare a stew for the wedding! Extra salt!

wait wait wait stew goblin wait

all the best weed in america comes from a single farm run by the last bigfoot in existence