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It’s a decision you make, one day, when you’re tired of watching everything that has ruined you, walk about you with its arrogant smugness. One day, when you decide to make a map of yourself and see the incredible way that trauma has made a home out of you. One day, when you step into a field of bitterness that stretches all the way through your body, over grown and unruly, you remember how those acres were once a single seed, a little word, a bee sting on your soft flesh. It’s one day after you’ve filed away for the millionth time a memory that douses you in shame and then gives you the gift of a match. It’s one day while you sit at the kitchen table and watch your mother surviving off of loneliness , watching it pull at the edges of her eyes and the corners of her mouth it’s that same day when you vow never to be that resourceful. It just takes one day, after a lifetime of winters when you can finally stand inside yourself and decide to become spring.