The best of us is a quiet aspect of us; and we do not focus on the best. Instead, we make the most cruel mistake of mind; we focus on the worst.
Humanity, the world, and you. Are so much better than you know; do not be afraid to realise that what is loudest, what is worst, what has the most volume is not what has the mass.
There will be a time, when bigotry is so small that even its loudness does not overpower the quiet bliss of harmony most of the world holds.
I was going to write on some other matter; oh, yes, how I feel about the ānot all menā thing. Ie, the mocked response that is often made by men when faced with often bioessentialist or genderessentialist statements that make them question their own humanity, and in asserting that they are not horrible disgusting people by nature of their birth or by their nurture - as most arenāt - they state that they are not a monster, and that most people like them, their friends and family members of that identity, are not monsters. Ergo, ānot all men are monstersā which is then shortened to simply be ānot all menā - it does not excuse the actions of the monsters, it holds no such purpose, it is an act of excusing oneself; for in response to being grouped in with such monsters, they feel a need for separation because they are not a monster.
Which is my pontificating and pretentious way of saying; generalisations are shit, especially when we focus on what is shit about the world more than we focus on what is good, and people respond to generalisations about categories that they are in by denying the generalisation because what else are they to do.
Are they to say all men are rapists, racist, misogynist, homophobes, transphobes, biphobes? Well⦠they canāt because they are not one of these, and yet they are in that accursed category of all men; equally so, you cannot claim that all history students like modern history more than medieval, you cannot claim that all Germans in 1930s and 40s Germany were Nazis, you cannot claim that all Socialists are Marxists, etcetera.
Anyway; another loosely related subject change, the male loneliness epidemic myth. Or, more so, why what it is view as being a myth; despite the fascistic view presented by the āalpha influencerā types, which has subsequently been adopted by every news outlet and grouping that has then heard of it, that being the view that this āepidemicā is that men canāt get girlfriends, and that is either because men are all āemotionally stuntedā people who are āstupid and childishā (the former taken from reddit, the latter taken from Instagram⦠neither of which are good places to cite) who rely on girlfriends for mental support - as according to the seemingly common āfeministā perspective, yet I pray that I am merely falling for my own words on both generalisations and falling for the loud minority - and the āalphaā view that it is all women and their feminism and equalities fault as it makes women believe they donāt need a man -> that shit needs work btw, why tf do people expect me to know more stuff about my best friendās own A-level then she does merely for our genders (among other issues that still need solving because child marriage, prevention of education, voting, fiscal autonomy and all that are even more horrible than just social stigma).
The actual male loneliness epidemic is that there is a stigma, among men, that it is wrong to have close friends; this is what feeds into the perspective of emotional reliance on girlfriends; because they donāt want to be seen as 1. Gay, because there is still stigma against that because it is seen as 2. (And mainly) Unmanly⦠to be emotional is to reject the stoic ideal which is that boys do not cry, that boys bottle everything up and that boys are weak if they do feel much emotion. Of course, no one is that ridiculously inhuman; which is why men have a much higher drive to commit to suicide, and why they tend to bleed out such emotion when with someone they feel they can trust much more they can trust āfriendsā because their friends hold the same view as them, the same view that has been engrained into them for most of their lives.
This is the same reason why men reject therapy, despite the option and resources being there, it is not because they would ārather be violent and horrible peopleā (citing Tumblr this time, lucky you), but because they have been raised that if they did go to therapy then they would not be good men because they would be too weak -> not even going to mention that when a man asks for help with this sort of thing, as I will anecdotally speak, he is often given therapy as a last ditch attempt -> the resources are there, itās just most men and boys especially hear āman upā and think that is all they can possibly get and that they cannot go further (this also leads into that hole alternative right pipeline stuff because they do not feel accepted despite absolutely being given priority over women in most if not every social aspect)
Iām kinda lucky in this respect, Iām a man, as probably should be obvious: but I was raised by a single mother who actually was not there the entire time, and I was raised in a bipartisan sense of the projected stereotypical and generalised expectation of a weird misogynistic stoicism provided by school and others while also being raised to actually be relatively in touch with my emotions compared to other guys my age -> when I cried, I didnāt really think much of it, I simply wanted to cry and it felt right, when a friend of mine cried he was worried that I would not want to ever talk to him again because he had cried.
TLDR: What is good is quiet yet numerous, what is bad is loud yet small. āNot all menā is a reactionary response to generalisation where a manās first response to having himself and friends and family lumped in with a bunch of horrible people is to try and separate himself from that horror. Male Loneliness Epidemic is a myth, in that is has literally nothing to do with romance except for the consequences of it on romance.
Might actually post something fun to Tumblr soon⦠maybe. I would also like to apologise for being quite binary focused in phrasing of women and men -> but kinda goes to show how shit generalisations are, no?
Edit; also, like, has anyone ever talked to another person Irl? It really makes you realise, damn⦠what drugs are the internet masses on.