LilWhee

lads had a dream last night that i was at the elton john concert and halfway through crocodile rock he switched to a prince medley and real live flesh and blood prince walked out on stage, and into the stunned, hushed silence i said quietly, “i thought you were dead” and he looked straight at me through the crowds of a million people, put his mouth against the mic, and said “do i look like the kind of man who dies” absolute legend 

This wasn’t a dream this was a premonition

no offense but the whole kissin kate barlow and “i can fix that” sam storyline from holes is quite frankly one of the most gripping and tragic in the history of cinema and i’m still not recovered from it

What it’s like to have any kind of chronic illness or mental illness. What it’s like to say, “Hey, I’m suffering from this symptom today.” but feeling like you’re making everyone else upset. Except, this issue happens every single day and it’s basically my whole life and it sucks and yeah. How can I NOT talk about something that happens to me every day. 

Update: the sign has worked thus far, she sucessfully cleaned up her clothes yesterday morning, and didn’t leave any on the bathroom floor last night. She asked if she can take the sign down, but I won’t let her just yet. LOL

This doesn’t sound like it was composed by a human

That’s ‘cause it was composed by the spider wizard

quick protip: if someone is crying or freaking out over something minor, eg wifi not connecting, can’t find their hat, people talking too loud, do NOT tell them how small or petty the problem is to make it better. they know. they would probably love to calm down. you are doing the furthest possible thing from helping. people don’t have to earn expressions of feelings.

Needed this today.

People don’t actually go from 0 to 60. If you think they did, you have failed to notice how long they’ve been at 59.

A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad

#this is team skull

The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.

I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy

Oh no a new one!!!

there is no difference between coke, pepsi, doctored pepper, sprites, ginger’s ale, root’s beered, mountain do, all of them. theyre all exactly the same.

hohoho! comparing these other drinks to ginger ale is like sticking you hand in a blender! because in both situations… heh you’ll know soon enough

I got rid of my heart twenty five years ago to make room! (for ginger ale) do not fear though friend! Your reckoning will soon be upon you!

this single post contains enough terrifying energy to power 500 haunted houses for the next twenty years