consider the lilies:

these are my own tags but i wrote a short little fic about it while in institute:

Grace can't quite wrap his head around it. "Wait, so . . . Jesus? Like, Jesus from the Bible? He visited you guys?"

Rocky's leg taps thoughtfully. "What Bible, question?"

"Um. It's a book of Jesus's teachings, I think."

"Oh understand. Erid has book of Jesus teachings, too. Very long book. Much to learn."

Grace, raised agnostic and grown atheist, really does not know how to come to terms with the fact that the Eridians know who Jesus is. He hasn’t moved since Rocky mentioned it, not even to fidget. That means that Jesus is real? Apparently? Christianity is right—or, well, the Mormons are right?

"So Erid already knew about humans," Grace states, crossing his arms. That, at least, is something he can address right now. He can work on the whole restructure of his belief system later. "Because Jesus was—is?—human."

"Is not," Rocky says with a vehement shake of his body. "Jesus is like Eridian. Jesus is Rock."

"No."

"Yes. Jesus say so Himself."

"Pretty sure he didn't say that."

Rocky makes a trilling sound that Grace has come to recognize as a huff. "Grace not read Jesus book so he not know. Rocky read Jesus book every day. Rocky baptized. Rocky 𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅯𝅘𝅥𝅮 (endowed). Not Grace."

Grace rubs his eyes with his palms, knocking his glasses entirely off his face. "Well then, how did they crucify him?" he asks, not even trying to hide his frustration.

“No understand word.”

"Crucifixion? They make a cross, like this?" He makes a cross sign with his fingers. "Nailed Jesus up there? How would they nail him if he was a rock?"

Rocky doesn't even hesitate. "Strong nails. Not cross. Asterisk."

Grace just barely doesn't burst out laughing at that image. It makes sense, he supposes. An Eridian Jesus would have to be crucified on an asterisk.

"Look, Rock, I'm no expert on Jesus," Grace says, raising his hands in surrender. "But maybe we have two different ones? Because I'm pretty sure he was human on earth, and the whole thing he did was die for our sins."

"Yes. Die for our sins."

"I mean, like, earth's sins."

"No, die for all sins. Earth and Erid."

"Did he die on Erid, too?"

"No. Jesus died somewhere else. Rocky now know was earth. Came to Erid after."

It doesn't make sense. It would be like - like saying Jesus went to the Americas after he died in Jerusalem, or wherever it was.

Then again, none of this makes any sense.

"Okay," Grace relents, before Mary can intervene on what sounds to her like a conflict. "Okay. So, Eridians are Mormons?"

"Yes, 𝅘𝅥𝅮𝅘𝅥𝅯𝅝," Rocky says, a word that sounds like a four-part harmony lingering on a high note. "Mormon. ocky will teach Grace! Like science!"

He might as well learn about Erid's religious culture before they arrive. It's definitely something he ought to be at least passingly familiar with. "Sure, buddy. Teach me."

Rocky hops excitedly. "Yes, yes, yes! Rocky set apart as missionary in case of aliens. Preach My Gospel in my room!"

Grace laughs. "A missionary? Like, one of the guys with name tags?"

Rocky hums. "Yes, I need name tag. Grace make Rocky name tag."

"You don't need that."

"Human missionaries wear name tag. Rocky need name tag."

"Rock."

"Cannot be consecrated missionary without name tag."

Grace sighs. "Fine, but it's gonna be made of paper. Happy?"

"Happy happy happy! Like Plan of Happiness!"

1 Nephi 17:2 And so great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children, and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings.

3 And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them; wherefore, he did provide means for us while we did sojourn in the wilderness.

There are so many forces in this world (in lds, christian, and just overall culture) trying to convince women to be weak and small. Diet culture is coming back with a bang. I get ads for weight loss drugs just about everyday. Any female fitness influencer's comment sections is full of both men and women talking about how women shouldn't be "bulky" and they need to be petite delicate little flowers. It's started to drive me insane.

Despite all that, here's a verse in the book of mormon literally talking about strong women; and it's portrayed as a good thing. Nephi could've left it at "our women did give plenty of suck for their children," and that would've gotten the point across, but he didn't. He included that they "were strong, yea, even like unto the men." They're not just getting enough food to feed their kids, they're getting enough food to be as strong as their husbands and brothers and fathers. (As a woman who works out this is harder than you'd think. The part testosterone plays in building muscle is so annoying. After years of going to the gym and getting my protein in I'm about as strong as the average teenage boy lol.) They're not criticized for being too bulky or too heavy or too masculine. The men aren't criticized or emasculated because their women are as strong as them. They're all praised because this is the result of following the Lord's commandments.

It's all about the Lord. He told them to travel throught the wilderness and provided a means for them to do so. They didn't just barely get by, they had enough food that the women were able to breastfeed babies for what was probably years, and become strong themselves.

A funny experience of challenging the class was when we had our lecture on conception and development in utero. He taps the microphone like a comedian who just bombed a set, asks if we can hear him, get’s a resounding and excited “yes!” and says “Ok! Ok! Y’all sounds excited! Let’s do a chant, see if that helps with some of the other energy. Are you ready?”

Of course everyone cheers yes, we’re Mormon, being in a room of people saying the same shit over and over is our jam. So he nods, gets a beat going by clapping, and starts chanting the word “sex” into the microphone. The claps die. The chant doesn’t start. But he keeps going, and going, until he gets half the class chanting with him by brutal shameless persistence. Then he changes the word. “Vagina!” And resumes until he has half the class. Then “clitoris!” then “penis!” then finally when he has half the room chanting he stops the chant and says “I only ever go until I can get half of y’all chanting because this is BYU and I’d be here all day if I waited for everyone to be comfortable even saying the word “sex” out loud which is INSANE because today we’re talking about how life begins and I guarantee you almost every woman who flinched away from chanting “penis” wants to have kids and most of the men who couldn’t pronounce clitoris want to have at least two kids and that does not work out in my head! We need to get over this fear to talk about conception openly.” He talked about sex as a biological phenomenon and as a fun thing to do sometimes and it was a transformative experience for me, and it was very funny as an opener.

He challenged us academically too, though. He assigned us the task of observing children at the campus daycare and told us he wanted to know who we had observed just by our behavioral observations. He meant it, too. He didn’t want us to just know about kids he wanted us to be able to see kids as distinct people and that was amazing. He pushed us out of the mindset of “how do I pass this assignment” and challenged us to internalize “how do I learn to do this in real life?” and he pushed us to observe children as people and not as science experiments or obedient joyful output machines.

Another way he challenged the class, and this one sticks with me tbh, is he told us stories. His technique is one I often utilize as a therapist. He tells a story that’s related *enough* to keep you aware of how your question or need is related, but just unrelated enough distract you from the question so when he brings it back to you it hits as an experience instead of a verbal response to an inquiry. He did this sometimes in response to questions from students and it was always an interesting way to experience learning. One day a student, a worried newlywed man who JUST found out his wife was pregnant, asked what he could do to help her because he felt so excited and overwhelmed he couldn’t think clearly. And the professor stops the lecture and thinks about it, like, REALLY thinks about it, and he leads into his story - it starts with a brief discussion on the complexity and uniqueness of fingerprints. Then he tells us about how one of his graduate students a few years back came into his office complaining that his wife was getting lazier. Him, being a therapist and a curious man by nature, asked the student what he meant. The student responds by saying that he felt “duped” by his wife because she’d been energetic and motivated and passionate and attentive until she got pregnant and now she “doesn’t do anything” and “has no ambition” and “doesn’t even cook dinner anymore” and “always says she’s tired even though she hasn’t DONE anything” and how he felt like it was all an act to pretend to be a good wife until she got pregnant and had him hooked forever.

And this guy is reacting to this in real time - he goes point by point through this graduate student’s complaints and nods patiently, curiously, then sinisterly as he understands the situation. He tells the grad students to come a little closer so he can show him something in a book, then whaps him upside the head with the book.

The grad student of course reacts with shock and anger and demands a justification for being whacked with a book and the professor responds with “how far into the pregnancy is your lazy lazy wife?” The grad student gives a response to he opens the book and slaps it on the desk and says “at that point in pregnancy your child’s fingerprints are developing. Do you know how complex and detailed fingerprints are? Do you know how much time and energy it would take to make that from nothing? That is what your wife is doing all day. She’s making your child’s fingerprints. Get that in your head and get over yourself.”

He then stops the story, looks at the guy who asked the question, and asks how far along his wife is? And the student responds, and he says “if you go home today and your wife is tired, it’s because she was growing functional kidneys for another human being all day. So tell her you’ll do the dishes, and don’t whine about it. And remember that any time you’re doing any chore or task you’re not accustomed to for the next few months, any time you’re eating an uninspired dinner, any time you’re rubbing her feet or helping her get to sleep and thinking “oh geez she’s so dramatic” remember she is growing another person and ask yourself if your dinner or unfolded socks are more valuable than a functioning kidney or a distinct fingerprint because I guarantee you it is not. She is engaged in the act of creation, fold your own socks.”

Y’all I mean the fucking CRICKETS in that room. My ears were ringing from the revelation he had just unleashed into my brain. There was not a single body in that room that was not GRIPPED by the response to this question. And I fully recognize that he was asking for fairly little, like, yeah, you should be an involved parent and partner because “for time and all eternity” means “even when she won’t have sex with me,” but he was saying it as a Mormon man talking to another Mormon man and that was so exciting and new to me that it stuck with me. I remember this story in a myriad of ways - it’s a good example of using privilege to challenge privilege, for example. It’s a good example of “lifting where you stand,” so to speak, by making a difference where you are instead of making a hypothetical “bigger” difference elsewhere. It helps me remind myself that neutrality is progress, too, and that the best time to do something I should have always been doing is now. It also helps me be patient with myself when I am sick - healing is work, recovering is work, resting is work, even if the demanding husband in my head can’t see it yet.

I just finished Second-Class Saints by Matthew L. Harris. It was an incredible read that should be required for every member of the Church.

I don't talk about this much, but I'm a mixed race person who would've been impacted by the racial priesthood ban. Like many who lived under that restriction in countries all over the world, I didn't find out until I was an adult and had been a member of the Church for almost a decade. And I had to contemplate for the first time in my life what it would've been like to live under the racist segregation of the Church. My patriarchal blessing would've contained racist, segregationist elements whose entire purpose was to facilitate my abuse in the Church. I never would've been allowed to serve my mission in Brazil. I never would've been allowed to enter the temple for my own endowments. I never would've been allowed to be sealed to my husband. Every good thing I have in my life that is so central to my happiness wouldn't BE there. It was a devastating reality to contemplate.

I knew that going into this book, but it goes so much deeper than even I knew.

I wouldn't have been allowed to enter BYU. I wouldn't have so many of the amazing friends I have from there. There are people reading this right now who never would've met me because the circumstances under which we met were not allowed to exist. Church leadership was so afraid of mixed race people like me, they never would've let me into BYU, for fear I would taint some white man's future children. They called me and people like me "mongrels." There are buildings on that campus named after the men who said that about us. And for so many white members of the Church, these realities are in the air they breathe without ever realizing it or having to think about at all.