An important skill to have when you grew up mormon, whether you're still mormon or not, is being able to think about the things you were taught and figure out if it was a, actual canon doctrine, b, common belief/cultural thing but not doctrine, c, a general american/conservative/Christian thing, or d, some random shit someone made up.
Presenting any of these things as another isn't helpful to anyone. There is a conversation to be had about culture vs doctrine and how they affect each other, but first you have to recognize which is which, and recognize what is because of the church culture, what's because of overall societal issues, and what was specific to your experience.
