I’m not happy to hear it!
So, I was just going through my JonDami folder on my google drive, which has way too many unfinished stories and saw this. It was almost done so I just finished it off and I’m putting it here. Tell me what you think.
This was an attempt at exploring a vulnerable Damian Wayne
This fight may have been the biggest they’ve had yet, since the beginning of their partnership, since the beginning of their friendship, since the beginning of their relationship. Damian crossed a line, he not only hid important information about their mission from Jon, but he lied about certain details. Jon didn’t care about the League of Assassins involvement or the parts of Damian’s past that came into the mix. All the trust they built up for years shattered like thin glass. Jon could feel his voice straining to compete with Damian’s. No matter how much love he felt for the man in front of him it didn’t blind Jon from the arrogance and snobbish behaviour Damian can display at times. They’ve been arguing for who knows how long and Jon’s frustration was at his peak. He finally exploded.
“God, I hate you!” Jon wasn’t sure how it became a thing since his first argument with Damian but it did. The two go to phrases that put a stop to every conflict since they were kids. The words didn’t carry any meaning to Jon, it just became a pattern he’s never decided to stop following. The sentence flowed right off the tongue and he would wait for Damian’s usual ‘Happy to hear it’ before they both stormed off to cool down and pick up the argument later.
“Happy to-,” The words hitched in Damian’s throat. That small hiccup was enough for the anger to start clearing from Jon’s mind. The silence made its way in between the two for the first time. Jon refused to say anything as he waited for Damian to finish. He felt his heart stop when he noticed a growing damp spot on Damian’s mask. “You know what? I’m not happy to hear it! I’m never fucking happy to hear it!” Damian screamed with a crackling voice. “If you hate me so much then why don’t you just leave and go find someone better! I’m sure it wouldn’t be difficult!” There was no comeback for this one. He didn’t know what to do. They’ve gone off-road, there was no pattern, no instructions to follow. Jon couldn’t navigate. Damian could only bottle away his emotions for so long, there was always a breaking point. One Jon was never prepared for. Damian heavy breath went shallow. His shoulders dropped and arms hugged around his body. “I’m sorry,” Damian whimpered and submitted. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” The mantra continued with Damian’s voice breaking down more with each apology. Jon was glad his feet had moved for him towards Damian.
Damian didn’t move away from Jon but he did flinch when Jon reached to take off his mask. Jon has never seen Damian cry before. He’s seen Damian sad, locked away in his room where no one else can see him and curled on his bed cuddled up to Titus or Alfred, yet he’s never seen Damian cry not even on his worse days. Some days he even wondered if Damian knew how to cry. Tried to imagine how his boyfriend would look in the act but was never able to produce a believable image. Now, after seeing the tears fall from those green orbs Jon decided that he never wanted to see Damian cry again.
“Dami, I didn’t mean it,” Jon cupped Damian’s face and wiped the tears away with his thumbs as they came flooding down. “You have to believe me, I didn’t mean it.” Damian shook his head and apologised again. Desperate to patch up the damage he caused, Jon pulled Damian in to wrap his arms around him and push Damian’s face in his shoulder. “I’m so sorry,” Jon pressed a kiss into Damian’s hair, “I didn’t mean it. I love you so much. I didn’t mean it”
Jon hugged Damian tighter, letting him cry onto his suit as he pressed kisses to Damian’s forehead and whispered apologies. The sobbing eventually stopped after a few minutes. He wasn’t sure if Damian had felt better or if he had just run out of tears. Jon could make an educated guess it was the latter with Damian’s body still limp in his arms. Still, it was only a matter of time before Damian started repairing his broken walls and lock Jon out again. The haze in Damian’s eyes had already started to fade, no doubt plotting his path to escape. So, Jon took advantage of Damian’s defenceless state and attacked.
“What else don’t you tell me?”
Damian muscles tensed and he squinted at Jon, “What’s that supposed to mean?” Jon could see Damian building up his walls again.
“I don’t mean like that. I mean,” Jon took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Do I hurt you every time I say that?” Damian looked down, away from Jon and the Kryptonian felt a punch to his gut.
“Not all the time,” Damian shrugged. “It’s not a big deal.”
“It is Dami,” Jon cupped one of Damian’s cheeks and tilted his head up. This time Damian had no choice but to look at him. “I don’t want to hurt you, I need to know these things.”
“It really doesn’t matter that much, Jon,” Damian muttered under his breath.
“It matters to me Dami,” if either of them heard the crack in Jon’s voice they decided to look over it. “I love you and I am going to do everything I can to make this work but I need you to talk to me.”
“I know, I know,” Damian sighed probably too tired to fight back anymore. “I’m sorry.”
Jon dragged Damian into another hug and slumped into the boy, “Yeah, I’m sorry too.” They stayed there, clutching as tight as they could to each other refusing to give up on whatever they had.