Sep 11, 2022
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#(the opposite of organizational tags are#echo tags:#)#and the self-laughing half-bowing half-curtseying to yourself standing with your song as you learn this learn it yet again#what intensity of extremity-of-its-kind creature i wish i had laid eyes upon years ago#i’ve never felt a dream that made me feel so dizzyingly desire mad i feel more brightly insane just thinking about it#it is the whole glory of life to be stamped with this Truth: YOU LIVED. desires lit and seals set from your world and lifetime ARE LIFE. of#ofcourse i@always had starson the insides ofmi eyelids about ‘we who wrestle with g-d’ but secretly even from other jews i have#‘wrestle and overcome and mount g-d like a bitch in heat BECUZ they are beautiful and powerful and huge and terrifying and everything’#‘surely They must laugh in glee if we ever truly succeed in doing so????’#what starts as resilience falls in love and symbiosis with what you were long-sufferingly wrestling with#all the truest parts of me blushedswollen in reaction and anticipation#the personal mythology of a human lifesoulminddesire is so so So intricate and full of willful implacable unanswerable power about what#infinitely complex and mysterious that no one else can fathom them with a mere violent and erasing dismissal about ‘u’ vs 'society'#we have reached heights far beyond the tower of babel but it is this thirst for understanding that marks us as like unto g d#being born and living. the truth of your longings are stamped like a seal upon your heart in ways so unique and precious and secret and#could be i am her.....i will sell it for no less than a third of your names....argghhh!#but is actually existing as the flaming friction intensity made in the grinding of extreme power#as a jew i say 'b'tzelem elohim' (in the image of g d') + ''ehyeh asher ehyeh' (i am that i am = i will be whatever i will be')#paradoxes and puzzles and wry defeats....they are everything#in a clever paradoxical twist of ponderinghood....what’s the term for it#this is what g-d says to Itself before laughing Itself into a manic break#coal sings#and if u don’t vibe u pivot to projecting and accuse this girl of making demands by dint of being visibly mutilated by a violent crazy#mystical thing she did that brands her as the type of person who likes that and is ruined irrevocably by a thing only insane(tm) people do—#— g d and tamar talking to each other while tamar is standing in the middle of the street with motorbikes honking at her—#this is what i meant in that post about gd being psychotic and the creation of the universe the reintegrative fusion ignition#this is one of my favorites...the casually incongruous lights going about their way is such a familiar and happy memory#yessssss.....infinity opened inside your body. a wormhole or a new big bang that you expand into. rich and dense and glittering.#in the occasional best case scenarios it allows your soul to blast and flower into its whole size and shape and you know its dimensions.
