chronically online and ill

The fall through the rabbit hole always made me nauseous, but it got better with each trip. And a little nausea and dizziness was more than worth it just to see his smile on the other side. When the pink light of Wonderland came sweeping towards me, I tried to land on my feet but stumbled and fell anyway, ripping a hole in my stockings. 

Max was by my side instantly. “Princess!” 

He put one gloved hand on my shoulder and offered the other to me. I took it and stood, brushing off my skirt. “I’m alright, I promise.” 

When I looked up, my breath caught in my throat. Did he have to be so devastatingly handsome? Seriously, it was a danger to my health. Noticing my stare, the corner of Max’s lip pulled into a smirk. “You don’t have to do that every time you see me. I’ve got enough hot air up my hat.” 

I looked away from him pointedly, but my hand was still in his. “I’m not doing it on purpose.” 

He leaned in to peck my cheek. “That’s what makes it even better.” 

I could never pretend to be mad at him for long. As soon as his lips met my cheek, I melted. I turned and beamed up at him. “You can kiss me properly, you know.” 

His dark brows rose below his bangs. There was still mischief sparkling in his amber brown eyes. “Oh? I’m allowed, am I, Your Highness?” 

I rolled my eyes playfully. “Yes, I permit you.” 

With that admission, Max’s teasing act dropped. He dipped his head to really meet my eyes. His hand on my shoulder moved up to my chin, tipping it up as he leaned in to kiss me. His lips were soft like always, and I could just taste the bitter note of black tea he must have had that morning. I let out a happy hum against him. I really couldn’t help myself. 

When he pulled away, we were both smiling like idiots. He brushed his thumb over my chin. “Thank you for visiting. I know it’s not easy.” 

I squeezed his hand. “It’s worth it for you.” 

I only caught a glimpse of vermillion on his cheeks before he turned away. “C’mon, let’s go before the butterflies’ daily migration.” 

I let Max lead me through the gates and gardens until we reached his humble cottage at the edge of a mossy forest. The small table outside was already laid with tea and biscuits. The cups and pot vibrated with excitement when we neared. He pulled my chair out for me before taking his own across from me. He reached for the teapot. “I’d say I made your favorite, but you never know with these pots.” 

The porcelain vessel hissed its displeasure but still let him pour steaming, pale yellow liquid from it. White tea! It smelled lightly floral and herbal. Max let out a sigh as I clapped my hands. “Thank you, Posie!” That was the teapot’s name. She made a little whistle. She loved compliments. 

I waited while Max served himself, then he raised his cup to me. I did the same. “And what are we cheering today?” 

He looked off to the side like he was seriously contemplating it. When his gaze returned, he was smiling once again. “All the time in the world.” 

I felt my cheeks warm, trying to play it off as heat from the tea. I looked down into my cup and took a sip. “Mm! It’s so good. I swear Wonderland tea is different.” 

Max added a pyramid of sugar to his cup. Sugar in Wonderland thought it would be boring to only come in cubes. “Different, but less predictable. Not that I’d have it any other way.” 

“You’re not supposed to sweeten white tea,” I told him. 

His smiling eyes met mine over our cups. “When have I ever done things the way you’re supposed to?” 

I shrugged my shoulders in wordless concession. He was right, and I wouldn’t have him any other way. 

We caught up on mundane things while we dug into sesame biscuits, his favorite, and they paired enormously well with the white tea. At one point while I was speaking, he seemed to look down at my lips. “You’ve got a little…” 

He reached over to brush away a sesame seed below my lip. Just that little touch of his finger flustered me. “Oh!” My eyes traveled from the tip of his finger to his face, which looked so focused. “How very unprincess-like of me.” 

The corner of Max’s lip pulled up. “I like you a little messy.” 

He must have seen the way my whole face reddened. But he didn’t say anything about it. He just took his hand back and sipped his tea like nothing happened. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt you.” 

Right, what was I talking about? “Oh no, you didn’t- I mean-” 

While I stuttered, his eyes slid over to mine. Then he started to laugh behind his cup. I shook my head and looked down at my lap, cheeks burning. I loved the hearty sound of his laugh, I didn’t care if it came at my expense. 

We were able to slip back into conversation after that, although Max did occasionally slide his leg against mine under the table. It made me clear my throat and he chuckled at that. 

While in the middle of a story, Max paused to roll his shoulder. “Rabbits, it’s hotter than I thought it would be today. Although, Wonderland weather is unpredictable as it is.” 

He shrugged off his trench coat and my lips involuntarily fell open. He wasn’t wearing a shirt under his vest, leaving his shoulders and arms exposed. While he turned to hang his coat on the back of his chair, my eyes roved up and down his muscular arms. Veins protruded from his forearms and ran down to his hands. He kept his fingerless gloves on, but I saw enough to infer the rest. A wisp of heat ran down my spine. 

When Max turned back, he noticed my look of surprise. “Oh! You haven’t really seen me without my coat on before, have you?” 

“I, um- no, I don’t think so,” I managed to stutter out. 

He cocked his head, seemingly picking up on my frazzled state. He feigned a yawn and casually stretched his arms above his head like he didn’t know what that was doing to me. I breathed out shakily through my nose.