Gee

STOP! Let the little penguin cross your dash he has places to go.

I just sat here and waited for a pixel penguin to waddle across my screen, AND I WOULD DO IT AGAIN

^^^ I did do it again (: Go ahead little Penguin

Damn tinkle winkle got deep

Isn’t that Po?

Does it matter?

does anything matter anymore…

And yet its still almost impossible to find the end of the tape

cowards. i can already tell the difference between a house and a car

wish pokemon was real so i could move to the country and farm mareep in peace

They’re called… sheep…

can your sheep do THIS [gets electrocuted]

stay there forever

We had a cow that would do this. You could take naps on her all day.

imagine being a pussy ass cop bootlicker

imagine calling people bootlickers for not demonizing a whole group

I love people who shit on all cops. Like, who’re they gonna call if someone breaks into their home? Not the cops, apparently. 

damn dude this slaps

Well i keep saying, licking boots gives you brain damage. now we have proof. all the dirt just gets into your neurons and bam. we lost another one. 😔

ok i’m stupid for wanting the crime rates to stay as low as possible wow guys i’ve been exposed 😭

The United States has one of the lowest murder clearance rates in the first-world. It actually dropped to a record low in 2016. Rape clearance rates are in the 30 percentile range. People have about a 40% chance to get away with murder in the United States. But I would not expect someone suffering from brain damage to know this. Good luck booking those low crime rates you speak of. 😔

not to be dramatic but i will never be comfortable with my physical appearance

“wait so are u gen z or a millennial” dude idk i was born in 1997, everyone has an opinion about what generation i should be in except me. i don’t really remember the 90s cause i was too busy being born and shitting myself, but i remember dialup internet and shit. idk dude i’m so tired, like, i’m only legally old enough to drink as of a few months ago but im somehow already thousands of dollars in debt

the struggles of the zillennials 

no homo but that moment u step into a patch of sunlight and ur body had forgotten what it was like to feel warm.. im in love

good night. sleep tight. don’t let the bed bugs bite. tonight. imma fight. till we see the sunlight. tik tok. on the clock. but the party don’t stop.

Sometimes it’s you and your iced coffee against the world