🐾 GRAB THIS, SARGE! 🐾

Pour one out for #fuck.

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

i want to be a force of optimism and a strong advocate for positivity. and a cheerleader for having fun

Everything I read about recovering from burnout is like “it takes months or even years to fully recover” and it’s like okay…. I have a weekend before I gotta clock in on Monday

i thought that was just. a regular tumblr post and accepted it

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

Why the hell does [tumblr] app have a whopping 3.5gb of cache. What could it possibly be storing.

I’m in there. Hi. Please don’t clear it

Oops.

⠀

my professor said “does no one have any curiosity about anything anymore?” and I’ve been thinking about it every day for a week

First humans ever to leave the solar system suddenly drop out of communications and the ship can't be found with any equipment. After one month of no contact their home countries start reluctantly holding funerals for the space heroes only for them all to turn up, healthy, well fed and extremely disoriented, in the middle of Tokyo, talking about alien abduction. Turns out that aliens found the poor humans straying out of their solar system, presumably lost, and took them to Alien Wildlife Rehabilitation before dumping them back in the middle of their native habitat.

I’ll bet they have cool new tattoos that turn out to be tracking devices too. Just in case these spirited individuals try to make another break for it.

... do the tats make them stupid popular, like that time scientists gave birds tracker anklets and it accidentally made them ultra fuckable

Let’s say yes. Those alien scientists are learning so much, and none of it is accurate.

why is it that ppl hear "fetish" and immediately think "devoid of morals" like ur genuinely not making sense. ppl dont actually become inhuman and beast-like when theyre turned on, thats something we are told bc it aligns with christian patriarcal values, u know that right? desire isnt actually bad. it doesnt make you evil, or incapable of having/respecting boundaries

i got a response to this abt how men get horny and "lose their minds" and "causes" them to behave vile. i rlly rlly neeeeed ppl to understand that men behaving inappropriately when turned on is something they are *choosing* to do, and when you equate that to human nature you are enabling them and diminishing the seriousness of that choice

"incurious" still GOAT insult. You could be better but you're not. You could learn but you won't, and for no good reason, just a base dispositional apathy. Get fucked