Professional Dragon Trainer

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

you have to be in a certain specific mood to listen to classic rock because sometimes a guy is playing his guitar and you're just like shut the fuck up man

yeah sure whatever

Good morning women trying to not become their fathers let’s get this bread

its easy to be cynical about the future but on the bright side at least more people keep giant skeleton statues in their yards now moreso than ever before

he definitely fucks but there’s no way he fucks normal

*through gritted teeth* when i do something wrong and am politely asked to change my behavior its just a simple request to fix a problem and not an indictment of my character. when i do something wrong and am politely asked to change my behavior its just a simple request to fix a problem and not an indictment of my worth as a human being

how r u gonna call them love handles and then try to convince ppl thats a bad thing. insane to me

Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things