Title

my family has had some pretty interesting encounters with psychics/mediums that seem genuine in the past, but nothing will ever be funnier to me than the last guy my mom talked to who was so definitely bullshitting, because she said "I was hoping to hear from my husband" and the guy went "he said....it's okay to Move On" and like. every single person my mom has recounted this too has been like "He Would Not Fucking Say That". as if this was an ooc fanfic about my father. it's just so fucking funny. fake psychic dude take your shitty headcanons about my ghost dad and LEAVE!!!

like, my parents were legitimately insane about each other. I cannot stress how much he wouldn't say that. I have to assume his ghost was standing right next to this fake psychic yelling "WHAT THE FUCK!!!!" when he told my mom to move on lmfao

actually. funnier to imagine he was a Real Psychic who was just trying to put a move on my mom and didn't think the ghost would do anything about it and now is now dealing with a violently angry haunting for the rest of his days lmfao

Psychic: I also choose this guy’s still-alive wife.

wait, why is his party gathering around him like that? what are you doing? your leader is dead, you already lost!

revival spells are fucking stupid cheater bullshit i hate you i hate you i hate you! making a youtube video essay rant on why you shouldn't use revival spells as im stuck in evil wizard prison

actually, wait a minute. if his party had a revival spell, why not use it on his dead wife?! fucking bullshit stupid ass hero party. i hate them!

oh my god it hurts

and it's going to hurt forever

It’s crazy that countries on the edge of the Sahara desert are reversing desertification by just digging half circles

Ooooh, Mr. Sawadoga innovated the traditional zai method by adding manure and other biological matter to the holes! This put nutrients in the soil as well as helping even more with water retention and attracted termites whose tunnels helped loosen the compacted earth, all of which supported plant-growth like no zai before! Which increased water-retention even further! Oh excellent, excellent work!

This is beautiful. I love this.

Does anybody know how to fix it

HOW

I WANT TO KNOW YOUR SECRET

SERIOUSLY THOUGH WHAT ARE YOU

I GOT THIS AND I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

I want a doot doot

Y'all better be shittin me

do it

give me doot doot

Please??

We might break this person

doot doot?

Can I have one?

gimme a d o o t d o o t

doot doot

OH?

I bet I won’t.

How bout me?:)

Hm🤔

i want a doot doot

I just want a lil doot doot😓

im curious..

can i get one?

do me :3

Ok but is it true?

it took a little bit to get doot dooted for me

I gotta test this

mmh

doot doot?

I wanna doot doot real‼️‼️

doot doot/

…i wanna b dooted :<

Im testing if its scam or not

gimme gimme

I don’t believe you

there’s no way

reblogging 3 times for science

i need to know

…Does this still work?

Uhh

yo wait does this actually still work???

DOOT DOOT

:0 doot doot?

i must say, i am curious to see what becomes of this

doot doot?

Aint no way

i wonder….

is it still around?

it is! I got the ask today lol

hmm.

for science!

if it is a human, doing this for thirteen years is crazy and i respect their dedication to the bit so much

Lemme test hehe

INJEED TO SEE IF THIS WORK

if this works ill scream

you can tell trans women are women because we're not allowed to be sexual but also everything we do has sexuality imposed upon it

you can tell trans women are women because we're not allowed to be angry

So, uh... following that train of thought... what's deeply wrong with the Lord of the Rings?

Johnald Ronald Rolkien Tolkien built fifteen different elvish languages and wrote poetry in all of them and you ask me what was wrong with him

@this-is-trans-joy

This is trans joy!!!

You listen to music regularly? Why? Have you even tried quitting? Could you quit? You get music stuck in your head? Wow. You're so ruined and music brained. I bet you make your partners listen to music with you when you have sex. Music addiction has really ruined a whole generation. You know it's not realistic to expect reverb in real life, right? You're probably so desensitized that you don't even feel anything anymore when you hear a bird singing that it wants some fuck.

Luigi probably fucks though.

Ok but why is Luigi different

displays internality by being capable of fear. to fear is to have something to lose. and what does he stand to lose? fucking.

Peach lives a life that is almost entirely defined by her position as an object of other people's desire, wherein she is robbed of autonomy by Bowser and expected to reward Mario with signs of affection. I think if anyone in Mario has complex thoughts about sexuality to work through with a therapist, it's Peach.

What I'm hearing is Daisy needs to take Peach to a strip club

It's crucial to help her escape from comphet

its actually easy to de-enshittify your digital experience all you need to do is install this browser extension and this browser extension and this browser extension and input this custom script into the advanced box and go into your system settings and reconfigure all these options you didnt know existed and change your entire workflow and switch to this alternative operating system and this alternative web browser and this alternative chat client and this alternative word processor and this alternative- sorry that one turned out to be malware delete that one okay now double check your task manager for unwanted background processes and element block these ads and invest in a good VPN and append all your searches with AI blocking keywords and wait a few years until everything you just did becomes shitty too so you can do it all over again okay kitten. its literally that easy.

big fan of telling people "have fun" when they say theyre going to the restroom

Reverse Sphinx who has a (toned and muscular) human body with a lioness head and she just bluntly tells you facts

you tell her you think she’s hot (she is) and she just goes, flatly, “you would have a bad time fucking me. my tongue is very rough and would hurt your skin” (she’s right but you probably don’t care)