I’m inventing a new meal called Wumber eaten between the hours of 3 and 4 PM that consists only of wood
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@rotary-supercollider
I’m inventing a new meal called Wumber eaten between the hours of 3 and 4 PM that consists only of wood

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sorry i will never shut up about this
Spider.
(reposts)
black boys and bunnies

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grown ass women btw
*sweating profusely*
nothing on this god's green earth can convince me that peter parker doesn't have an ao3 account where he is elbows deep in a 'rise of skywalker' fix-it fic. like, fully invested in it, been writing it pre-spider bite with ned, who is just as enthusiastic about it. but the thing is, it's really hard to do updates when you are literally spider-man.
every three months he'll post and in the author's note there's some shit like "sorry this took a while, i got shot seven times :/" or "i know it's been a minute, i literally got hit by a bus and then stabbed in the leg, but i'm all good!" or sometimes ned would log in and post with a note "hey i'm a friend posting on the author's behalf, they're healing from severe hypothermia but promised an update, so here it is!"
and the fic just gets increasingly more popular for the author notes alone. a good handful of the comments are something along the lines of "i'm not even in the star wars fandom, i'm just here to see if the author is good" or "every update i cheer for another day the author gets to live at this point"
and any reader who is a native new yorker kind of pieces together that holy shit the author might be spider-man because the timeline adds up, and they just fully embrace it. spider-man will stop a robbery and the guy behind the counter will ask when the next chapter will be up. spider-man returns a stolen backpack to a girl and she'll tell him that he "really got poe's voice down so well, it's really impressive."
ned thinks it is hilarious. mj finds out about the fic from twitter, to peter's absolute horror, and changes peter's contact name to "friendly neighborhood ao3 author". but the worst thing to happen is after an avengers battle where peter took a pretty big hit and ends up in med-bay. and during a press conference, when someone asks how spider-man is healing, tony just drops "spidey won't be down for too long. the star wars fic will be updated within the week, probably."
ao3 goes down for two days.
@outsidewolves had to double check that you didn't draw this
Honestly I think the only thing that's preventing Ralsei from transitioning is that nobody has mentioned "you can just be a girl if you'd prefer to" at her in the span of the five days that she's been experiencing the concept of having agency
i feel like it's kinda rude to use post-transition pronouns for someone who hasn't even realized yet that what they want is to transition

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Lowly Worm X Tracey Chapman
A comedy in two short parts.
For anyone confused
like the idea of unnaturally aged cheese. making my gouda old using dread magics forbidden by the college of sorcery
this cheese was aged by sending it to the beach that makes you old
insane shit happening over on uquiz right now

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dreamt that walmart was doing some kind of sale where they partnered with a company called "freevaginaphotos.com" and when i bought something they also printed out a picture of someones vagina and gave it to me
you do not get to destroy other peoples bodies
thank you for reminding me, i was about to destroy someones body until i saw this