one day at a time (season 2) → starters
slightly edited in some cases to work for rp purposes.
feel free to change phrasing or pronouns to fit your muse(s)!
❝ Oh my god, am I passing? ❞
❝ You’re a disaster! I can fix yu. ❞
❝ You don’t have to be a superwoman. There can only be one such woman in a family/squad/group and that is me. ❞
❝ Hi, I’m [name] and my pronouns are _____ and _____.❞
❝ When I came out of my mother’s womb I winked at the doctor. ❞
❝ Sounds like you always had a thing for doctors, eh? ❞
❝ I don’t have a crush on her! I don’t even know her! You have a crush on her! ❞
❝ How’d all that butt stuff go? ❞
❝ I have a strict 7 date policy. ❞
❝ Guilt, shame and regret are things of the past. Be sex positive! ❞
❝ I’m a mother. I’m sex negative. ❞
❝ I can’t have sex without love. ❞
❝ I don’t even know if she’s gay! ❞
❝ In love, you have to make yourself vulnerable. ❞
❝ I like to be in America. ❞
❝ I don’t want to stalk him. I just want to know exactly where he is and follow him there. ❞
❝ How dare he have other friends! ❞
❝ You’re the wallpaper on his phone. I tried to make him delete it but neither of us knows how. ❞
❝ I want so badly for them to grow up and live full, happy lives. But I can’t teach them how to do that because I don’t know how to do that myself. ❞
❝ I’m failing them/her/him/you. They/He/She/You deserve so much better than me. ❞
❝ When people tell me ‘Be happy! You have a great life!’ that makes me feel like garbage, because I know! ❞
❝ What’s wrong with me that I can’t appreciate what I have? That I can’t feel it? ❞
❝ What’s the point of living if you can’t feel anything? ❞
❝ I know what that sounds like but I would never do anything like that. ❞
❝ I think you know healthy brains don’t go to that place. ❞
❝ Oh man. I think you might actually be my best friend. ❞
❝ You do what you need to do to fix yourself. And I will be here for you.❞
❝ I have depression and anxiety. And I take medication for it. ❞
❝ The meds help me stay in control of my life. ❞
❝ You can’t have a stroke to win an argument! It’s not fair! ❞
❝ I know you like to have the last word but this is dramatic, even for you. ❞
❝ Check it out! I’m butch! ❞
❝ I don’t want to be on a drug for the rest of my life! I shouldn’t have to need it! ❞
❝ I take a lot of online quizzes. Turns out I’m a Hufflepuff! ❞
❝ You know, everything is a big deal to you. ❞
❝ You eat this, you get some sleep and tomorrow, you try again. ❞
❝ Forehead kisses are wildly underrated. ❞
❝ There’s something really comforting about this. But then again, it might just be you. ❞
❝ Babies are so stupid. ❞
❝ I knew he was too pretty to be straight. ❞
❝ Are you gay? ‘Cause you haven’t mentioned it in the past five minutes.❞
❝ I know you’re not crazy about me dating but I was wondering whether I could get ice-cream with them?❞
❝ Even though you’re the embodiment of the alpha male, which normally I find…. bleargh… looking at you up close with your chiseled features and blue-green eyes with specks of gold – I get it. ❞
❝ You know, I did like the Women’s March. I looked very nice in that pink pussycat hat. ❞
❝ It literally feels like the weight of the world is sitting on my chest. ❞
❝ I can’t wait until I turn 18 so I can vote. ❞
❝ I will rip your beard off and feed it to you. ❞
❝ HEY PLANET KILLER, RECYCLE THAT! ❞
❝ I have a lot to be angry about. Climate change. Racism. Sexism. There’s a lot of bad things happening. ❞
❝ It’s not my fault people hate powerful women. ❞
❝ School dances are barbaric events designed to make less popular kids feel bad. They’re for total narcissists. ❞
❝ Did I ever tell you why I stopped speaking Spanish? ❞
❝ I was so worried. And you surprised me with your acceptance and your love and your support. ❞
❝ My time with you is the only thing that makes me happy. ❞
❝ I know that _____ is the love of your life. I get that. But I think you might be the love of mine. ❞
❝ Yes? But I have seven more reasons why you should let me do it. ❞
❝ You’re saying I’m going to go through my whole life without being oppressed at all? ❞
❝ I’m just super hungry…. for food! ❞
❝ I don’t have very many friends. Like, if I were to count them, I wouldn’t say any numbers. ❞
❝ I’ve been told by more than a few people that I’m “a lot”. ❞
❝ How about we protect each other? ❞
❝ I wish i could take away her/his/their/your pain and feel it for myself. ❞
❝ You’re off your meds? ❞
❝ … Is that really a DIY situation? ❞
❝ That’s it! Tomorrow, I’m going on Twitter and putting a stop to all this. ❞
❝ I’ve thought a lot about what happened and I’ll spare you the details about the anger, and the crying, and the weight loss, and the empty space on my wall where you picture used to be. ❞
❝ I decided that there’s no point in focusing on the negatives. I’d rather think about the good things that came from this. ‘Cause I’m pretty great. ❞
❝ Just because I’m gay, people will hate me without knowing anything about me. ❞
❝ Now I know not to expect the best from anyone. So, thanks, I guess. ❞
❝ I learned some really cool stuff about myself. Like I’m tough. I’m really tough. ❞
❝ So whatever, I’m moving on with my life. I’m going to be fine. I’m just really bummed out for you. You’re gonna miss a lot of stuff and that sucks.❞
❝ I am seeing someone but she’s really hard to read. I don’t know if she’s that serious about me. She says she just wants to climb me like a beanstalk. ❞
❝ You don’t sound like yourself. I’m gonna go.❞
❝ I can’t wait for my first time. And I hope I do it right. ❞
❝ I think it’s time to admit that I tried and I failed. And now I think it’s time to quit.❞
❝ More bad things happen because you have a gun, not because you don’t.❞
❝ This is the last house that should have a gun! ❞
❝ I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you, but… I’m straight.❞
❝ It’s stupid…. stupid how much I love it!❞
❝ Everything can be cured with Vics VapoRub!❞
❝ You got this. And we got you.❞
❝ You know, I think being a lesbian has made you very angry. ❞
❝ You realize you’re the top half of the screen? ❞
❝ I like you so much. Like, so so much. ❞
❝ I needed you and you weren’t there for me. ❞