"I'll watch over you"

do you want to know how ‘skinny’ really feels?

‘skinny’ feels like going from captain of a sports team to someone who nearly faints so much that they become the only student in the school to be removed from PE class.

‘skinny’ feels like bombing all of your exams because you’re too hungry to think, and never actually managing to finish school.

‘skinny’ feels like dead eyes, dull hair, yellowed teeth and premature ageing. it feels like aching joints, a million bruises, and no resistance to heat or cold.

‘skinny’ feels like being too preoccupied with your body to enjoy your youth or even allow yourself to be photographed with the few remaining friends who can tolerate your spaciness and food freakouts.

‘skinny’ feels like endlessly waiting for the day when you’re finally light enough to be worthy of love, and weighing your current hunger against this vague point in the future that never comes, because even if you reach the weight you thought you needed to be it still won’t be enough.

‘skinny’ feels like being told you’re too bony to hug.

‘skinny’ feels like watching everyone else live happy, healthy lives while you can’t even do laundry without getting lightheaded, and wondering if you can undo any of the damage you caused by malnourishing yourself for years.

i thought that starving myself would somehow fix my life, but all it did was make things worse. i’m 25 years old and i haven’t really accomplished anything since i was 15. people my age are doing things like graduating from university, getting married, having children, and getting cool jobs, and i’m just trying to convince myself that it’s okay to eat more than 1000 calories a day.

These are the good ones

your high school teachers are LIARS.

Most college professors accept late assignments.

Some of them are so chill that you can ditch most of class so long as you can handle the final. 

It’s all about playing it by ear.

YOU DON’T ASK TO GO TO THE BATHROOM PLEASE SAVE YOURSELF THE EMBARRASSMENT. 

It is NOT harder than high school. You’re more or less ready for it if you do ok in high school, ok?

Seriously. I got A’s in AP classes yet was terrified that I wouldn’t be able to handle college.

Surprise surprise?

AP classes are harder than college classes. 

No joke. 

College professors are a lot more liberal on what counts as a “right” answer. 

Plus they give you points for caring. 

Some classes give you points just for showing up. 

There’s an atmosphere of controlled panic, and you are not the only one. 

You can pretty much go up to anyone and say god life is a nightmare and finals are gonna kick my ass, and they’ll go saaaaame, regardless of how genius they’re supposed to be. 

Seriously. 

College student here.

High school teachers are the WORST of liars.

They’ll tell you college is a “whole nother level” but that’s such horse shit. 

High school is a standardized sheep counting facility. 

me, less than five minutes later: