Howdy Y'all

me after drinking another suspiciously green martini that makes me bedridden: "i hope the next one is apple flavor instead of poison flavor"

Self aggrandizing humor saves lives. I’m an authority on this since I’m legitimately the coolest girl in the world.

hey guysss so unfortunately the rumors are true and im leaving the narrative. Buttt the good news is my absence will create such a gaping hole in your lives that it will become a sort of presence itself, and so in a way it will kind of be like i never left! But i am. Leaving just to be clear.

everyone get unemployed. i will provide for us.

I love how safe everyone in the comments feels about being entirely dependant on a potentially psychopathic benefactor 😁

im nice…..

He’s literally nice

The ways that exist to break this game that simultaneously do absolutely no damage to how this game functions are ASTONISHING.  

Did you weaponize the chickens?

You hurt cuccoo? You hurt cuccoo like the link? Oh! Oh! Death for molduga! Death for molduga for a hundred years!

That’s his Tinder profile.

And you’re next

Great tits will do some serious Hannibal Lecter shit.

Working an office job will truly make you have the wildest enemies, bc why is my nemesis rn a woman I’ve never met and who exclusively haunts me by sending diabolical emails, and also a specific guy who left my company before I even worked here and made the system so fuckass that it ruined procedures for like a year

so there's a new SCP movie in the works. this is a bad thing because the entire SCP project is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0, which means that any derivative works based on it (i.e. this movie) have to be released under that same license, and that license explicitly permits no-cost reuploads. like piracy of this movie would be explicitly legal. the only exception would be if they tracked down and got explicit written permission from every collaborator who has ever contributed to any of the stuff they touch on in the movie, but the authors on the site are just as surprised as everyone else, so they didn't do that. the movie is being made by a UAE-owned production company so either they're aware of this issue and are fine with making 0 money on an expensive movie, or they're aware of this issue and are going to attempt some legal bullshit to screw over the writers who wrote 90% of their movie. IP law helps creators btw

i think the angriest ive ever made someone on reddit was when they used an emoji while arguing and i said "What is this tiny yellow picture"

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