What's Up NERDS

dude imagine if a hog saw this

wouldn't be nearly as many mushrooms is all I'm saying

This is my morning sickness rn

FUCK conversation starters, we only use conversation STOPPERS in this house! “Oh hi, how was your day?” “I’d peg Michael Myers.” BOOM! Conversation, dead in a flash!

fill your body with cranberries so the horse that kills you gets a sensual surprise when he begins to feed

i will give the  horse that kills me no such luxury

6:30 is the best time on the clock, hands down

today i saw a cat who immediately and casually hissed at me on sight but after i said “that’s rude” he meowed politely

Did you grab portal 3??

Too fucking funny to not reblog….. <3

*youth pastor voice* here’s something that’s “on fleek”…….the lord

remake of the twilight movies BUT bella is replaced with a 65 year old retired mailman from brooklyn named danny who constantly refers to edward as “a dracula”

“YO! Eddie boy, yous tellin’ me, that you is some kinda…Dracula?”