why are girls so cute

Man Im sorry for snapping at you , uts just that I only got 8 hours of sleep last night and I only had like, two pandcakes with strawberrys and whipped cream and like three premium sausags for breakfast

How it feels to kiss my wife

i know thata right 👆

Sometimes I talk a lot and sometimes I don’t talk at all and somehow both are embarrassing

being as i am an idiot, and having been one my whole life, i just wanna say that i find it very easy to do nothing, and go nowhere. i eat chocolate late at night in the dark. i stand in the garden also. and i’m often waiting for something to happen. and i’m stupid.

Call me old fashioned, but I think the president saying "a whole civilization will die tonight" is the part where he should be deposed immediately.