dusty old bones

one thing I believe should be more heavily influenced in the roleplay community ( that really isn’t respected ) is the RIGHT OF REFUSAL. not everyone has to say yes to a roleplay, even if you delivered sugar-coated candied comments abt their portrayal / characterization / etc. if you give those things, it should be from your HEART, and not because you are attempting to ENTICE them into writing with you.

with refusal comes MAJOR ANXIETY – most writers don’t feel comfortable saying that they don’t want to write with someone, and it is because they want to avoid hurting their feelings. believe it or not, there are KIND ways of telling someone you don’t have an interest in writing with them – and those ways should be respected. do not make someone FEEL BAD for not wanting to write with you; and do not FORCE them to tell you their reasoning. as long as they are kind, you should respect their decision and not be rude towards them.

The second not only takes the pressure off but also might help the person really consider what their actual needs are like hey I haven’t eaten, maybe that’s a reason I feel crappy. It kinda takes the asker out of the immediate picture so the person struggling can focus on what they actually need, and then if you CAN help, you can offer it.

Emoji spell to keep your loved ones safe.

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

I’ve been seeing this a lot lately and I understand if people get miffed about it. I would be too. And I think it’s a good call to try and interact with folks by calling attention to it.

let it be known though

if I follow you but we never rp, it’s not that i’m using you to get my follower count up.

I’m just rlly bad at making the first move.

Follower count doesn’t mean squat to me since I know that it usually ends up being like, dead blogs I’ll never see again. So yeah. 

This is a post where I’m encouraging you, the reader, to make the first move. Just try and talk to the people you follow, even if you don’t think they’d be interested in rping ( provided you follow their rules on contact, mutuals, ect ). Maybe they wanna rp? Maybe they don’t. Your chances can only increase if you come with an idea to bring to the table, so just try it!

“Gay” is used as an insult. It is used to be demeaning. Its used to discriminate. And yet its used as the all mighty umbrella - gay rights, gay marriage, gay community - when discussing the entire community.

Gay gets used as a slur. Queer gets used as a slur. But I don’t walk up to gay people and say “your identity is a slur, you know that right” or get pissed when they say “the gay community” when they mean the whole community.

Personal identity and preference in terms, even harmful words that get used as slurs, are not questioned; except for the word Queer.

Queer gets shut down. Queer people get others in their faces saying “your identity is a slur!” Queer people don’t have the freedom to identify in a community, but are forced under other terms against their will due to hypocrisy and double standards.

It was meant to denote sexually perverse people, most frequently sex workers and those who hired them. Anyone who participated in anything but married, vanilla, straight sex might have been referred to as “gay,” including any suspected LGBT person.

The word (already being one frequently used on the community,) was reclaimed as a community identifier when the community wanted to disconnect from the clinical and diagnostic implications of “homosexual.”

There is record of queer being reclaimed and used as a personal identifier literally before the popularization of gay. Both words are reclaimed slurs with negative histories, and BOTH are used as slurs against the community still to this day.

Also, queer is reclaimed in a particularly empowering way. It doesn’t just mean “same-sex attraction” but encompasses a whole spectrum of attractions and gender orientations. It’s a word that says to asexuals, pansexuals, bisexuals, trans folks, genderfluid and genderqueer and genderless folks and people who are still figuring themselves out, “hey, you’ve got a home here. We don’t need to categorize you to love you.” 

This is important because there are a lot of divisions within the LGBTQ+ world, and in particular cis gay men and cis lesbians often overlook or exclude trans, bi and asexual people. Queer is the only word that not only demands equal acceptance for everyone, but leaves the door open for words and descriptors that haven’t even been invented yet. 

Lmao yeah! the pushback against this idea is overt and disgusting and I don’t trust anybody who perpetuates it. 

Queer is full of the types of people who don’t make good poster children for the middle class assimilationist cis gay couple just looking to get married and have some kids. Queer forces us to realize the fight didn’t end with gay marriage, and cis gays are gonna have to step out of the spotlight sometimes, and realize cis gays have privilege, and fight for someone with less. Trans people, nonbinary people, people in nontraditional relationship structures, aromantics, asexuals, sex workers. Heck more and more bisexual people these days are switching over to queer because the amount of biphobia in the so-called lgBt community is so alienating, and also because so many of us feel the term bisexual reinforces a false gender dichotomy and we’re too tired of jokes about kitchenware to use pansexual.

Text of a manifesto originally passed out by people marching with the ACT UP contingent in the New York Gay Pride Day parade, 1990. -

An Army of Lovers Cannot Lose Being queer is not about a right to privacy; it is about the freedom to be public, to just be who we are. It means everyday fighting oppression; homophobia, racism, misogyny, the bigotry of religious hypocrites and our own self-hatred. (We have been carefully taught to hate ourselves.) And now of course it means fighting a virus as well, and all those homo-haters who are using AIDS to wipe us off the face of the earth. Being queer means leading a different sort of life. It’s not about the mainstream, profit-margins, patriotism, patriarchy or being assimilated. It’s not about executive directors, privilege and elitism. It’s about being on the margins, defining ourselves; it’s about gender-f— and secrets, what’s beneath the belt and deep inside the heart; it’s about the night. Being queer is “grass roots” because we know that everyone of us, every body, every c—, every heart and a– and d— is a world of pleasure waiting to be explored. Everyone of us is a world of infinite possibility. We are an army because we have to be. We are an army because we are so powerful. (We have so much to fight for; we are the most precious of endangered species.) And we are an army of lovers because it is we who know what love is. Desire and lust, too. We invented them. We come out of the closet, face the rejection of society, face firing squads, just to love each other! Every time we f—, we win. We must fight for ourselves (no else is going to do it) and if in that process we bring greater freedom to the world at large then great. (We’ve given so much to that world: democracy, all the arts, the concepts of love, philosophy and the soul, to name just a few of the gifts from our ancient Greek Dykes, Fags.) Let’s make every space a Lesbian and Gay space. Every street a part of our sexual geography. A city of yearning and then total satisfaction. A city and a country where we can be safe and free and more. We must look at our lives and see what’s best in them, see what is queer and what is straight and let that straight chaff fall away! Remember there is so, so little time. And I want to be a lover of each and every one of you. Next year, we march naked.

I came of age after they discovered HIV and before they discovered how to treat it.   THAT is how old I am.

I worked and marched with friends and loved ones and the banner that brought everyone together was “Queer.”   The word doesn’t need to be reclaimed.  It has been reclaimed.  Before a lot of y’all were ever born. 

The word gay by the 1890s had an overall tinge of promiscuity – a gay house was a brothel. The suggestion of immorality in the word can be traced back at least to the 1630s, if not to Chaucer:

But in oure bed he was so fressh and gay