A mess

this behavior is nothing new. the global south and everything in it - the people, the culture, our heritage - is seen as nothing more than a decoration or commodity to colonizers. i don't even need to bring up the koh i noor or the entire british museum; these examples are recent and egregious enough on their own.

6 months ago, i was banned from twitch, my only source of income, for, and i quote: "". They did not provide me a reason. The person who reported me has been going around telling trans women to kill themselves and bragging about reporting me. Now that it has been 6 months, however, I can at least request reinstatement- theoretically.

Unfortunately, I can't get into the appeals page or my twitch account at all; I can't even change the phone number used for 2fa because the 2fa service is that shit, and the phone number associated with the account belongs to a friend who is way behind on his bills after a divorce.

we've managed to get most of them paid, but he's still another $150 away from getting his phone reconnected, at which point i will be switching over to my current number so this never happens again. and then i can maybe actually get my twitch account back.

if anyone has anything they can spare to help, it would be immensely appreciated ;_;

Local dentist saw a shadow on an x-ray for an unrelated visit and found bacteria eating away at my tooth and skull thats been happening for years. It hasn't been spotted until now because I wasn't showing any of the associated symptoms.

I need multiple surgeries to get the remains of the front tooth broken into pieces and removed, the bacteria scrubbed off, a bone graft applied to my skull, an implant installed and of course a new crown manufactured and screwed in.

They urged me to do it as soon as possible or else it will get worse.

If u could please donate / share ill be endlessly grateful ❤️

There’s the hazy-eyed drugged-out empty thing, who lives in a foggy world in its own mind. Comfortable and sleepy. Docile and sedated. Kept calm by its own fuzzy mind and memories. It doesn’t know it deserves better. It doesn’t know it’s been dehumanized or even was once a human. On some level it knows it’s being kept, but the idea of resisting is so distant and uncomfortable that it’s just easier to stay in the cage, no matter how secure it actually is. This pet barely feels the pain, jolting it only momentarily from its haze.

Then there’s the clear-eyed, pissed-off but entirely broken pet. It knows exactly what’s been done to it. It knows it’s been degraded and dehumanized. It knows what it once was, knows it doesn’t deserve that treatment, and would bark and bite if it still believed it would help. It’s docile because it’s given up, but that doesn’t mean it accepts it. It does what it needs to do to survive. Maybe it fears me, but it will protect me anyway. The life it had is gone, the option to get away is gone, and it will at least fight to keep what it has, no matter how much it hates it, hates me for what I’ve done to it.