Joy

SEPTEMBER 4

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CAN YOU BELIEVE IT GUYS

6 DAYS

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48 HOURS

Yo moma so stupid she DRACULA'S AMULET ATTACK 🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛📿📿🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛📿📿🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛📿📿📿🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛📿📿📿🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛📿🇧🇷🇧🇷🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛🧛

Every time i purchase a moderately expensive item the Karl Marx on my shoulder is like "For shame... you purchase yet another pair of jeans when you have 5 already at home, you despicable commodity fetishist? In my time, a man with five outfits would consider himself blessed beyond measure, and yet you want for more, while there are children starving in the world??" to which the second Karl Marx on my other shoulder says "Objection! Those 5 pairs of jeans all wildly uncomfortable or have holes in the ass, due to the decline of clothing quality driven by the fast fashion industry, unfortunately making this purchase a necessity... Plus, by purchasing a slightly more expensive pair of jeans from an independent brand, seeking quality over 'brand recognition', they are deliberately trying to avoid engaging in conspicuous consumption!" to which the third Karl Marx clinging to my back like that beetle from Doctor Who says "Remember, my friend; the less you eat, drink, buy books, go to the theatre or to balls, or to the pub, and the less you think, love, theorize, sing, paint, fence, etc., the more you will be able to save and the greater will become your treasure which neither moth nor rust will corrupt — your capital. Buy the jeans," to which I say "I don't know if any of you have actually read Karl Marx"

Harry Du Bois is that you???

'mobsters' are part of a 'mob'. and so you'd think 'lobsters' would be part of a 'lob', but ohohohhohoho, life just isn't so simple

^these are the additions I want on my posts. Take notes people

im always thinkjng about that one time i was on register for like 4 hours straight and said over mic "someone blease take over register i am about to become the joker." and they came to relieve me faster thab ive ever seen anyone relieve me before

parents got a new cat they named lord montague and this morning i heard my dad in the other room say "i would have to advise against that decision, my lord" followed by a crashing sound

All of your childhood stuffed animals will greet you at the gates of heaven