Explains My Life

my mutuals are so hot I wish I could see all their dicks :/

If you had shown me this site in 2005 I would have asked you if had checked your virus software lately, because this looks like a bad one. I would have clicked away so fast it would give you whiplash. Looking at these sites now, I have to convince myself that they aren't virus laden sites and fight against the pavlovian urge to just navigate away.

I navigate away anyways because fuck them, there's usually a better site (though they are dwindling quickly). I still can't get over how the internet "as intended" today looks like a malware ridden fever dream from 20 years ago. This is every story I've ever read about an empire that used to be great and has now fallen into turmoil.

the mortifying ordeal of being known by 20,000 bees

That’s 20,000 new friends!

If you haven't found it by 75 it just might not be your night. We'll try again in the morning, Sport.

Makes sense. I mean, a passenger of a cruise line isn't called a sailor, right? Astronaut literally means "star sailor."

Huge oversight on my part you're absolutely right