The quickest means of work escapism

There are not enough pieces of media. We’re partners comb each other’s hair. Every time I see it, I go absolutely feral. Why is it so rare? Am *I* the weirdo? 😭

Hair. Braiding. 😩 🙏🏻 😭

If I'm elected as your president in 2028 I promise to bring back the Western Interior Seaway.

Pretty babies come swim in w ater with big fish water is fine with big fish in come taste interior seaway with big fish

Why is it easier and more comfortable to sit in a position that actively damages my joints than it is to just sit with okay posture. Why does my body crave its own destruction

New shoes

unhelpful aubergines

Prints of these are now up on my inprnt! Link in bio as always and thank you for the lovely comments 🖤

talking to preschoolers is awesome bc they have not fully differentiated stories into 'true stories' and 'imaginary stories' yet so you will tell them about something that happened you once (coyote came out of a bush right in front of you and got startled) and they will tell you about how one time their house was full of coyotes in every room 'including five in the garage' and they're not even like, aware i think of the idea that they are technically 'lying'. they are simply telling stories about coyotes bc its time to tell stories about coyotes.

once my friend made a drink he called turpentine that tasted like every worst college night out rolled into one and felt like getting whacked in the head with a hammer, and I woke up in my own apartment with my phone wallet keys clothes and absolutely zero memory of the night before, and when I checked my watch I'd walked over 60k steps.

60k steps in the middle of the night in heels for reasons entirely unknown to me. what was I doing. where did I go. where did I come from. cotton eye joe. or whatever.

OP went dancing with the 12 dancing princesses pass it on

everyone go home this guy solved it

@professorsparklepants

yeah this is the end of a portal adventure of some kind, I'm sure of it.

World Heritage Post

What’s really cool about this is this is the first version of this scene that I’ve seen where the tone doesnt whiplash wildly which is so hard to do!!! Bc it’s a scene that comes directly after some rough public shaming and it is both a love confession scene and a scene where a woman asks someone to kill someone and the love confession IS funny but Beatrice’s monologue is not. A lot of the other versions- even well beloved ones like the 2011 version with David Tennant and Catherine Tate- do this scene and there is emotional whiplash, audiences often laughing when Beatrice begs Benedict to kill Claudio. To see it done this way??? Oh my god the line read on “if a were a man, I would eat his heart in the marketplace” DESERVED that cheet

Link to full version in the comments.

LOWERCASE LETTERS ARE FOR THE LOWER CLASS

and here we have a capitalist 

Did you just.

let us all take a moment to appreciate that all of human history and human language and the universe itself aligned to make this joke possible

#those look small enough to be covered by new larger googly eyes#just saying

They can avoid further "vandalism" of this specific Kind, by OFFICIALLY modifying it with more permanent eyes. I don't know If the reason for NOT doing that is to preserve the defining featurelessness of the original Art, or because they don't want to create precedent for adopting modifications, which might lead to eventually being expected to give it genitals...?

Sticking a dildo to it was the first thing anyone did

were they arrested? or is it just googly eyes that are illegal in south australia?

The dildo didn't damage the paint job so nobody cared.

Sounds like the person who pulled the googly eyes off should be charged, seeing as that caused the damage. They should have been removed properly and there wouldn't have been damage.

the nasty trick is that making friends is pretty easy but managing to keep in touch with everyone is next to impossible