some of you have never had your notp be the most popular ship in the fandom and it shows

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some of you have never had your notp be the most popular ship in the fandom and it shows

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some people will be like “I wonder why fanfic writers don’t share their works anymore😔” and then this is them when a writer is kind enough to share something they write — as a hobby, for their own enjoyment — with them for free.
some people really don’t realize how privileged they are that they get fanfics for free. imagine having access to something for free because someone is kind enough to share it with you… and then being rude, entitled and an ungrateful pos to that person who was kind enough to share their creation with you for free
“almost 1 year is a lil too much for me” fuck off. fanfic writers don’t owe you anything. one of my favorite fics was updated after 13 years, and what I did is that I thanked the author for choosing to continue the work, I didn’t act like a spoiled toddler by asking why they didn’t update sooner. and even if a writer chooses to abandon their fic permanently with no explanation, that is their choice, their hobby, their decision. they don’t owe your entitled ass anything.
you people let tiktok rot your brains to the point you see everything as content farm and engagement. not a piece of art created by the artist’s love and passion. it’s dystopian.
Love the boots.
This is art! 😍
Link to the thread so you can take a closer look at the photos
Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk
“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”
Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?
Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby
Husband: RIVETING!
Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️
Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!
Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk
All of tumblr collectively at my husband:
Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream
Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!
Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued
Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.
THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND
yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this
Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays
Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.
????
Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave
Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!
FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering
I have follow up questions:
1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?
1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?
I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.
Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂
So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂
Everyone is always so so kind on this post but I do want to warn you all that this did in fact lead to an insanely verbal child, and if you choose that life you have to commit to that life.
Penny Rose is now 5 years old and she
1. Starts talking the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she passes out at night
2. Asks, and I am not exaggerating I counted, an average of 892 questions a day
3. Does not accept "I don't know" as an answer to said questions, will usually have a follow up question as to why you don't know OR a suggestion on how we can find out together
I pay for limitless data and have 709 Google tabs open on my phone at all times

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Spin this wheel twice... These are your new roommates at Starfleet Academy!
How do you feel about this?
AMAZING!!!! This is the best case scenario
Great! I like both of these people
Good.
Eh... Could be better, but it could be worse
Bad. I'm not going to enjoy this year
TERRIBLE. Someone will end up dead
I'm dropping out
other/nuance/secret whatever option
if one/both of your new roommates is a child you assume responsibility of that child
if you get the same person twice, you have to live with both of them
there's actually only one best case scenario
going to keep recommending star trek prodigy to people wanting to get into star trek until the day i die. it's the perfect entry point into the universe i swear. it's a short show (should've been so much longer. but that's not the point) so not a huge commitment. it doesn't have a bad first season like many other st shows, it starts out strong. it clearly explains what star trek is about and what universe this is in the first few eps so it's very accessible. friendship and hope and working towards a better future are pretty central themes in the show and that is like 90% of what star trek is about (i think the only thing prodigy "lacks" is complex moral dilemmas but 1) i could be forgetting something, 2) it's a kids' show and 3) there's plenty of that in other shows. i am more than satisfied with the essential star trek things that we got). it introduces characters from elsewhere in the star trek universe so if someone who watched prodigy wants to watch another show they might have a familiar face. and most of all it's just such a beautiful and heartfelt and thoughtful show and i can't imagine not immediately being hooked on star trek after watching it. maybe this is controversial but imo if you don't like prodigy star trek just isn't for you. and if you do like it you are going to LOVE what else star trek has in store
many women are excited to get old and weird, but i have great news that it's fully possible to become weird now, before you get old. just imagine the heights of weirdness you will be able to reach in fifty years if you get started now. that's what I think
The new Odyssey adaptation has inevitably gotten people talking about a Muppet version of it, and they’re frequently suggesting Kermit as Odysseus, Miss Piggy as Penelope.
I’m sorry but that’s thinking way too small, hear me out:
We need to have Miss Piggy as Odysseus, and Kermit as Penelope.
Think about it… who’s the more fickle, prideful, warlike one in that relationship? Who is absolutely ready to go ham, at a moment’s notice?
It ain’t Kermit
Miss Piggy tied to the mast while Statler and Waldorf heckle her from the sea
But who is the single human cast member in this tale? Who gets to put in an Oscar-worthy performance alongside the Muppets and what role are they to play?
There’s no single human, everyone is a Muppet except for one scene. Circe, played by Janice, turns Odysseus’s crew into humans who still behave animalistic and are all played by Academy Award winning actors.
Every so often online you’ll hear about a woman who spilled McDonald’s coffee on her lap that sued McDonald’s. It’s touted as the prime example of a frivolous lawsuit, and McDonald’s have put in a lot of money to spin the case that way.
I'm sick of seeing that lie peddled by clickbait news sites and popular accounts trying to ridicule her with "Oh you didn't expect coffee to be hot?".
What actually happened should radicalise you.
In 1994, Stella Liebeck, who was 79 years old, spilled coffee on her lap while in the passengers seat of the car. The coffee was dangerously hot and caused third-degree burns over 16% of her body including her inner thighs and genitals.
*Warning - Very graphic images of the burns*
Image 1.
Image 2.
Stella originally tried to settle with McDonald's for the cost of her medical care - $20,000. They only offered her $800.
Throughout the case it was discovered that McDonald's were selling coffee between 30-40 degrees higher than other places. That change in temperature causes third-degree burns much faster, if it had been from somewhere else she would have had roughly 20 seconds to wipe away the coffee and avoid third-degree burns.
McDonald's were behind the smear campaign against her, so whenever you see anyone spread their misinformation, you can now correct them.
Reblogging because I’ve just seen someone doing McDonald’s PR for them *again*
In case this isn't clear, it wasn't just that location making the coffee illegally and dangerously hot. It was their company policy to do so at the time (it was a few seconds faster or something). McDonalds was, as a matter of their own policy, putting their customers at risk, illegally and without anyone's informed consent, as their default mode of operation*.
If the coffee had been spilled on an infant in a car seat instead and had killed them, I wonder if people would still think any of this was about people being "overly litigious."
*which shouldn't be a surprise from the same company that swore up and down their fries were vegetarian, only for it to come out layer they were soaking that shit in beef.

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You’ve heard of the Roaring 20s........
now get ready for the Screaming 20s - coming to a decade near you in 2020
is it too early or can we start screaming now
in retrospect perhaps we should have started sooner
this post is the equivalent of a newspaper from the day of the outbreak being blown past by the wind after you wake up in a post apocalyptic world
The Odyssey but retold as a low-stakes modern adventure of one guy out with his girlfriend leaving the bar with his buddies to do just one (1) simple thing real quick, it'll take like 15 minutes tops, he'll be right back, but then some bullshit happens and the trip keeps getting more complicated as more bullshit keeps happening while he just tries to get back to the bar because he promised his girlfriend that he'd get back and he knows that she's still there because she told him she'd wait there.
And by the time he finally gets back it's almost 3 am and the bar is about to close while she's sitting there stone cold sober, surrounded by 5 drunk guys unsuccessfully trying to convince her to give up on waiting for him and go home with one of them instead. And the guy shows up to proceed to beat the shit out of them before explaining himself to her like hey sorry bullshit kept happening, my phone fell into a storm drain and my wallet got stolen when I was trying to find someone who'd borrow me a phone so I could call and
His girlfriend had been fending off the 5 drunk guys for most of the evening by explaining that even if she was going to ditch her boyfriend, she can't possibly leave without finishing her beer, which she is keeping perpetually full via careful sleight of hand where she's just pouring it back and forth into and out of the pitcher.
However the drunk guys are also drinking, and eventually she can't afford to buy another pitcher for the table so she can't keep up the ever-full beer glass trick. At this point she has to resort to setting up the pool trick shot that she's never seen anyone but her boyfriend pull off, and says she'll leave with whoever manages the shot first.
That buys her another hour or so and then, finally, her boyfriend makes it back. He looks like shit, hair down and just a mess, he's wearing an entirely different jacket that he got from an alley, and barely recognizable—especially to 5 guys who've been drunk for hours now. He lurks for a minute, finds out what's going on, and proceeds to pull off the trick shot first try. Throws the jacket off, fixes his hair with a hair tie his girlfriend lends him, finally looks like himself again, and THEN beats the shit out of them with the pool cue.
yuh i was there, that's how it happened
Heartbreaking: This Hognose Naga Was Slightly Startled
You try to flip her over but she keeps doing this
@real-sound-reblogs
I just pulled an all nighter and I thought I was cognitively fine until I saw this beast and immediately thought "oh my god he's in camo, he looks like camo print army clothes, I can't believe that anture randomly made something like that, that coincidence is fucking crazy"
So yeah I should go to bed

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Something I really struggle to get people to understand is that like. Sometimes there was no intentional homoerotic subtext, the author was just extremely misogynistic. Sometimes the author wasn't "secretly shipping" those two men, the author literally just hates women so much that they see them as being literally incapable of relationships with depth. Like this is kind of a big thing with misogyny actually. A lot of extremely misogynistic people truly believe that a man can only have meaningful and complex relationships with other men because they literally just think women are so inferior they only exist to birth children and clean the house. It's like when people say along the lines of "no one worships exclusively men quite like straight men do". It's just that phenomenon actually. That happens to be manifesting in a raging misogynist's writing. Writing a man character who literally only puts effort into his friendships with other men while completely ignoring his literal girlfriend or wife is actually an extremely straight thing to write. And that doesn't mean you can't ship those men or that there are no stories with actual intentional homoerotic subtext. I just think it's important to be able to recognize extreme misogyny in writing and acknowledge it without brushing it off and assuming good intentions when literally all evidence is screaming that this was a misogynistic writing choice and not a representing gay men choice.
You are not unlovable
you are not broken
you are not a failure
your brain chemicals are just messed up. you're doing amazing, don't let the dark thoughts possess you.