"im tired of living through major historical events" is now "dear lord please let me witness a high profile political assassination in the next 1-2 years. amen"
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@jevvica
"im tired of living through major historical events" is now "dear lord please let me witness a high profile political assassination in the next 1-2 years. amen"

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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All I'm saying is Jayce Talis is a bisexual polyamorous man who has a type and that type is just, Higher Beings. His type is just Jesus Christ. Bro straight up wants to fuck God
Edit: damn bisexuals found this post hello y'all hope you have a nice day the post reached its target audience
adulthood is just a constant struggle of, “man, i want cookies for breakfast, but I also recognize this is a bad nutritional decision. On the other hand, the only one who can stop me is me. i know that fucker’s weaknesses. i could totally take me in a fight.”
frog and toad are my two remaining brain cells struggling to keep my horrible body alive

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bastille has done more for the queer community by just making all of their love songs about "you" instead of specifying a gender than taylor swift has in all of her discography. thanks for coming to my ted talk.
this post is VERY funny bc it has a fuck ton of likes and like. two reblogs. the fear of the wrath of the swifties is VISCERAL.
the only heaven I'll be sent to is when I'm alone with you
#What if this is my last straw
Quick comic to get out my FEELINGS I want to THROW UP Neil

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i just realized Radovid didn’t just become the lover of a bard - he became the lover of one of the most famous bards of the Continent who is incredibly well known for his songs he writes based on his love and heartbreak brought on by A Guy He Loved Who Broke His Heart. imagine you were a prince and your kingdom’s spy network was like "hey there’s this bard spy we’re using for his ties to the Literal Two Most Important People to the Future of the Continent" and then you’re like. that’s fucking taylor swift.
THEY HAVE THE SAME FUCKING FACIAL EXPRESSION HELP ME-
thank you Joey Batey for being the best part of the Witcher

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At first Netflix said, come write for us. We’ll save your cancelled shows and write about whatever niche story you want. Our algorithm says people will watch it!
Then a few years later they said, regardless of our promises or contract obligations we are cancelling shows after two seasons without telling anyone. Turns out no matter how loved a show is, we get less subscriptions after the second season.
How many subscriptions did we bring you? Netflix won’t say.
So writers started writing two season shows. Just give us two seasons, Netflix. Like you promised.
Then Netflix said, oops sorry! Turns out your show didn’t premiere at #1 and the views in the first day weren’t what we wanted so we’re cancelling your second season.
What were the numbers? How many people watched our show? Netflix doesn’t say.
Then, they did something extra special. They started taking shows and splitting their first season into two halves. Inside Job was not two seasons. It was one season split in half.
Oops! Sorry! The second half of your first season didn’t do as well as the first half, so now your show is cancelled!
Why? How many people? How much money? These companies are making cash hand over fist and they refuse to tell people the truth: people loved your show. Loved it. But some corpo exec wanted an infinite money making machine. Do you know how long shows are in production for before you watch them? Years. Like, 5+, even 10+ years. And Netflix gives it less than a week before they decide whether you’re getting cancelled.
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