Kitty!!!!!
this little goofball
oh hey whatâs this thing
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@je-te-dis
Kitty!!!!!
this little goofball
oh hey whatâs this thing

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First, I wanted to say that I love love love your Harry Potter fics and what-ifs! thank you so much for writing them :) And I also wondered if you ever written what if the Dursleys had refused to take Harry in?
When Petunia Dursley refused to take Harry in she forfeited his birthright protection, so Dumbledore took the baby to the safest place he knew: Hogwarts.
The applicable staff (mostly just⌠not Snape) took Harry in on a rotating schedule as he grew from baby to toddler to child. They traded extra credit for babysitting among the older students, and Harry grew up knowing a few dozen different laps that were safe and warm to nap in.
This was a Harry who grew up among books, among old transient walls and learned professors. They gave Binns night duty sometimes, and let him talk young Harry to sleep. This was a Harry whose world changed, on principle, daily. The stairs moved. The walls became doors. You had to keep your eyes openâyou had to pay attention. So he did.
He grew up in a school. Knowledge was power, but knowledge was also joy. This was his sanctuary. There was magic in his world from birth.
âThe castle will keep him safe,â said Dumbledore, when McGonagall came into his office to complain for the eighth time about Albusâs rather cavalier take on child-rearing. âThatâs what it does.â
âThen why do we bother with chaperones ever,â McGonagall said, tempted to shriek it. âShould we let all the children run about willy-nilly at all hours, or just the orphan waifs?!â
âHeâs not a student. Heâs a ward of Hogwarts. It will take care of him, Minerva.â
McGonagall walked off fuming. A cat with spectacle markings followed Harry almost constantly from ages three through four. At some point McGonagall was far enough behind on her paperwork, and had seen enough suits of armor carry the kid back to his room, enough draperies lift off the wall and tug Harry away from edges, and enough stairs creakingly shift their slope for his tiny toddler legs. She gave a grumpy sigh, stole some of Albusâs lemon drops, and resigned herself to a magical world.
The Grey Lady, the ghost of Ravenclaw Tower, didnât really like boys but she liked children. She especially liked patience, and politeness, and Harry had been raised by McGonagallâs stern table manners, by Victorian portraiture and quite a few House Elves. He said please, thank you, and ma'am, and as a child he was very cunning in how he got bedtime stories and bedtime snacks out of most every adult he met.
The Grey Lady told the best stories, you see, the ones with riddles in them. You had to think and ask questions to get all the way through them. So he hunted her down with big patient eyes and plates of very smelly cheese, and she told him stories that made him think.
When Harry was stable enough on his feet to walk, and then to run, Sir Cadogan would race him through the castle, the knight scattering banquet tables and galloping across landscapes, twisting through the abstract gallery up on the seventh and a half floor. Harry stumbled and sprinted up stairways and didnât notice for years the way Cadogan waited at the end of corridors for him to catch up.
Harry was a chubby-legged toddler, in this worldâcute cheeks and stubby limbs. Itâs a cute image, yesâ but this is important. He was a chubby kid. He ate in a high chair on the teacherâs dais, getting peas and mashed potatoes on the adults beside himâ Sprout laughed. Snape didnât.
But this is importantâHarry filled his plate. He wobbled up on little legs and grabbed biscuits from the table, slurped his soup, got marinara sauce on his chin and forehead and somehow behind his ear. When he was hungry, he ate. If he snuck down to the kitchens at night, it was for the adventure of it and nothing else. When he was hungry, he ate.
When he was four, they started letting him go sit down with the students. Bill Weasley, on route to be a prefect next year, took him under his wing and scrubbed his face down after meals. Harry was passed around the Hufflepuff table; theirs was the House Common Room he most liked sneaking into, with its barrels and cozy warmth. Nymphadora Tonks turned her nose a dozen different shapes to make Harry laugh, gurgling, as a toddler (and then a child) (and then for the rest of her life, honestlyâit never stopped being funny).
The whole Ravenclaw table got distracted from meals, trying to solve riddles from a book one of their Muggleborns had smuggled in.Harry pushed his fork through his gravy, trying to draw out his thoughts but only making squiggles.
It was years before Harry sat at the Slytherin table for the first timeâno one had ever set him down there, like they had with the others. But he liked greenâit was the color of Professor Sproutâs greenhouses, where he went and napped sometimes in winter. It was the color of his motherâs eyes, from the little book of moving pictures Hagrid had given him when he was three.
All the Slytherin kids seemed big, but everyone Harry ever met seemed bigâexcept for Flitwick, who was seeming smaller with every growth spurt. He leaned forward, teetering on the bench, and grabbed a chicken drumstick. âHi,â he said, because heâd had a childhood full of tea parties with high portrait societyâ the French nobility and the tired housewife from the third floor and an old witch with her sleeve on fire but very particular table manners. âIâm Harry. Whatâs your name?â
By the end of the meal, they were flicking peas across the table with their spoons, like catapult projectiles. Harry had been unwelcome in so few places in his life, after heâd left 4 Privet Drive, that he simply didnât expect it. He asked Warrington, a Slytherin with shoulders like a bulldogâs, to help him with the juice, which was too unwieldy for his kid-sized wrists. Harry sat there blinking, smiling, until Warrington took the jug and poured him a brimming glass.
Keep reading
The actual, legit Blu-Ray release cover for The Room.
I am as baffled as I am intrigued by the choice to Photoshop the eyes.
you know i didnât expect that.
Iâm pleasantly surprised
I want this

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OH MY GOD THEY ACTUALLY TOOK THE TIME TO DO THIS BETWEEN TAKES? DURING THEIR BUSY SCHEDULES? THE FUCKING CAST AND CREW OF THIS SHOW ARE FUCKING PERFECT
49 students were each given 52 frames of Taylor Swiftâs Shake it Off and together they produced 2767 frames of lovingly hand-drawn rotoscoped footage. To find out more info of who was involved and a link to the original click through to the YouTube link here Hopefully we can spread this around and get Taylor herself to see it!
neighborhoodÂ
J'ai essayĂŠ dâexploiter un peu le concept des post sur Tumblr =)Â
Trying to explore the way of posting on Tumblr, 1 post = 1 floor. It was fun !Â
Mad Max Cats by Cassie Graus

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Cricket puts the âcuteâ in âexecutive assistantâ but sheâs lousy at helping me go through old files.
good, this is the kind of Content that I am best equipped to provide
No one loves food as much as The Rock does.
My hero.
i wonder if my pets have like a proper language and when i try to speak back to them im just speaking jargon
like for example my cat always speaks to me when I come home and i meow back to her and sheâll meow again & even though i donât think twice about it to her itâs probably a situation where itâs like
her, meowing: âim glad youâre homeâ
me, meowing back: âtax benefitsâ
her, meowing: âwhy do u always do thisâ
cats actually have a human-specific language. cats donât often meow at each other and seem to use subvocal communications that humans canât hear to chat cat-to-cat. however, cats seem to use what humans would call âshout-until-youâre-understoodâ to speak to humans. so basically, itâs more like:
âIâM GLAD YOUâRE HOME!â
âtax benefitsâ
âNO, IâM GLAD YOU ARE HOMEâ
âwaffle ironâ
âITâS OKAY. I LOVE YOU TOO, MY DUMB HUMANâ
iâm in class send help

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HP reread X: some of these are embarrassing
this has been said before, multiple times, by people who are a lot funnier than me, but I think itâs worth noting for posterity: Dudleyâs shitty little mates all call him âBig Dâ. hmm. HMMMMM.Â
Harryâs reaction to Sirius telling him not to do anything rash is PURE GOLD. heâs literally like âum?? this guy went to prison for a decade, broke out, tried to murder someone, nicked a hippogriff and went on the lam and HE is telling ME noT TO dO AnYTHinG RAsH???â itâs a bit like when he told Harry not to use Hedwig because sheâs too conspicuous after sending him letters by fucking toucan. Sirius âdo as I say not as I doâ Black or what?Â
according to Sirius, all the pureblood families are interrelated. THE POSSIBILITIES HERE ARE ENDLESS. itâs no secret that Sirius and Draco being related is my favourite thing in the world, and I know recently thereâs been an uptick in people who write Luna and Draco as related, which is very cute, but Iâm not sure theyâre really CASHING IN ON THE COMEDY. for instance, picture this: ERNIE AND DRACO, COUSINS. what if their hair is the same shade of blond? maybe they share a nose. they definitely both have a tendency for theatrics. please imagine two chubby, pink toddlers with blond hair. they are both wearing posh nappies with their initials embroidered on them. one of them is giving the other a Chinese burn. I am so happy.Â
I love the aside about how they all sit and try to open Slytherinâs locket while theyâre cleaning out Grimmauld Place. can you fucking imagine if itâd opened? all of them hanging around in trackies with rubber gloves on up to the elbows, armed with dusters and polish and fucking Voldemort comes bursting out of a necklace to shout at Hermione and tell her sheâs gonna fail all her exams.
Iâm not convinced Hermione has parents. I think she leapt fully-formed from sea foam like Venus. when was the last time she went home? has she seen her parents for longer than two days at a time since she went to Hogwarts? why are the Grangers so fucking lenient? their daughter spends ž of her time at boarding school in another country and then comes home for a weekend and goes, âsoz mum, Iâm going to stay in a grungy house in London owned by a convicted murderer. slater!â and doesnât come home for a fucking year. what the hell, Grangers? youâre dentists! I donât expect this sort of behaviour from dentists!Â
omg when Harry bumps into Lucius Malfoy at the Ministry, Lucius says, âWell well well⌠Patronus Potter.â I think we can safely say that Draco inherited his incredible sense of humour from his dad. phew. that was a fucking humdinger. Patronus Potter. oh god, Lucius, stop. youâre killing me. thereâs literally no excuse for this greeting slash insult slash abysmal attempt at âcomedyâ. he must have panicked and blurted out the first thing that came into his head. no wonder Draco is such a fucking clod.Â
Harry has a minor crisis when Mrs Weasley puts him on the spot about Billâs hair. sheâs blathering on about how out of hand it is and how GOOD LOOKING Bill is and how itâd look SO MUCH BETTER shorter and then she goes WOULDNâT IT, HARRY? and Harryâs like âoh â I dunno ââ and, I quote, âa bit alarmed.â the best thing is if you read it in the right tone of voice itâs like that arsehole friend who compliments the person you fancy right in front of you and then goes DONâT YOU THINK SO??? and does that insane smirk/eyebrow wiggle combo and youâre left like yâyeah? yeah h h ? Â you loo k fi ne ?? which is essentially what harry does here. essentially. it is absolutely what happens.Â
okay, so, regarding the whole âNotorious Mass Murderer OR Innocent Singing Sensation?â thing: what if Sirius really IS Stubby Boardman, lead singer of The Hobgoblins? Iâm serious. out of every single person in the Harry Potter universe, who seems the man most likely to create an alias and start a fucking rock band? yeah. Doris Purkiss doesnât seem so batty now, does she?Â
I feel like MANNERS, POTTER, OR IâLL HAVE TO GIVE YOU DETENTION deserves a bullet point all of its own, because really? really, Draco Malfoy? this sounds like a fucking PORN OPENING. you are a HOT, GAY MESS. any money he walked out of the compartment, closed the door behind him and immediately had a I Canât Believe I Said That meltdown and Goyle had to take him down the train to get a cup of buildersâ tea.Â
speaking of Draco Malfoy, Useless Idiot, I have chosen to believe that his emphasis on the word âdoggingâ was simply him putting feelers out. heâs new to the dogging scene and is testing the waters. you never know where youâll find a fellow dogger, especially in the wizarding world. hop in a thestral-drawn carriage, park it in the forest, wait for the magic to happen.
while weâre on the subject: theyâre all sitting at the Gryffindor table talking about how the hat wants them all to be mates, and Harry goes, âand it wants all the houses to be friends?â then IMMEDIATELY zeroes in on Draco at the Slytherin table. like. Haz. you are casual acquaintances with so many Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs. you could have glanced at any of them â you do, in fact, have to LOOK PAST ALL OF THEM to see fucking Draco fucking Malfoy AT THE OTHER END OF THE HALL. YOUâRE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF, HARRY! YOUâRE GIVING THE GAME AWAY!
I know that the âhave a biscuit, Potterâ scene is everyoneâs favourite bit, but that must just be because everyoneâs forgotten the second biscuit-related exchange: ââHave another biscuit,â she said irritably, thrusting the tin at him. âNo thanks,â Harry said coldly. âDonât be ridiculous,â she snapped. He took one.â fucking Minerva all like âyouâre turning down a biccy because youâve got the monk on with me? what in godâs name is wrong with you?â
lmaoÂ