jaerisdiction

The younger boy doesn’t react to the older’s hostile tone. “Bro, just trust me on this,” he assures, shovelling through his backpack, “I’m cooking up a storm.”

Honestly, it’s quite the sight to see. A folding table dragged out from their shared apartment, covered in a (hopefully clean) bedsheet, and leaned against the front, a cardboard sign, propped up with two rolls of duct tape stacked on top of each other. Not to mention their empty jar of protein powder has finally been put to good use, now serving as the donation jar, decorated in hearts and everything. Are those fairy lights he sees draped across the top? What are they even plugged in to? Oh nah, he’s really going all out. 

To complete it, Jungwon uses the sharpie he just fished from his bag to write KISS FOR A CAUSE in big bubble letters along the cardboard, looking proud of himself.

Jay can’t help but wonder what had gotten into his friend. Did Jake put him up to this? It seems like a Jake thing to do.

“What’s...,” his voice lifts as he begins asking, “what’s the point of this?”

“Are you blind?” Jungwon scoffs, gesturing to his creation. “It clearly says Kiss For A Cause.”

“Yeah, but what’s the cause? Is it a charity event?”

If he had gotten an answer within two seconds, he couldn’t have gotten suspicious; he swears. Jay isn’t the kind of person to automatically jump to conclusions. However, as the silence between them hangs for way longer than that, he can’t help but give in to his urge to pry.

“Does this have something to do with… she-who-shall-not-be-named?” 

Sputtering, Jungwon’s arms start flailing around and a fiery red blooms up his neck, settling at the tips of his ears. “Pffft! What would make you think that?!”

“Who do you take me for?” He continues, clueless to the fact that he’s just digging a bigger hole for himself with each new word that comes out of his mouth. “A down bad loser?”

“Do you want me to answer that truthfully?”

“Screw you, man.”

“Hey!” Jay gasps, desperately holding back a laugh. “Look man, I’m not here to judge you—“

“Me when I lie,” mutters his friend.

“Okay— wait,” he tries again. “I understand the lengths that one must go to bag their crush, but this is…” he eyes the makeshift booth, “too much.”

Out of all of his friends, Jungwon is the last to come to mind when he thinks of pulling something like this. Despite being younger, he’s always had a more mature outlook on life, and usually,  that maturity was reflected in his actions. 

“Dude, you’re literally risking getting mono just to get a chance with—”  The feeling of a warm, clammy hand covering his mouth cuts him off. 

“Do not say her name.” Jungwon threatens in a hushed whisper as he pushes his hand against Jay’s mouth even harder. It smells faintly of sharpie and tape. Gross.

“Get your hand off mmmmph-!” Glancing from one side to the other, he relents, lowering his hand and shaking it off, disgust lacing his features.

“Ew,” he gags, repulsed. “Why is your breath so warm?”

Jay rolls his eyes. “Human biology, stupid. What about your sweaty ass hands, huh? I’m gonna get pimples because of you.”

“You already have pimples,” Jungwon huffs, moving to sit behind his makeshift booth, shooting a quick look at his watch, and making a shooing motion with his other hand. “Anyways, I’m going to be starting soon; you best be on your way.”

“But you didn’t deny it when I asked if it was about you-know-who.”

“Fine!” Jungwon bursts, abruptly standing on his feet. “And if it is? How else is she going to notice how kissable my lips are?

Jay was shocked before, dumbfounded even; now he’s just… stupefied, that Harry Potter ass spell, emotion thingy. He means this in the most bro way possible, but Jungwon does not need to be worrying about whether or not you’d think his lips are kissable. Practically every girl he knows would jump at the chance to lock lips with him, which is exactly why he cannot, for the life of him, wrap his head around this insane reach of an idea. 

“Just tell her you like her, bro.”

“I've tried!" Jungwon throws his hands into the air, voice climbing an octave. "Notes, compliments, walking her to class... I've done all of it, and she just doesn't get the hint."

He pauses, gaze drifting off toward nothing in particular. "But maybe when our lips finally touch, she'll realize just how in love with me she really is." He sighs dreamily, his fingers drifting up on their own, tracing slowly along his bottom lip.

"That's insane,” points out, nose wrinkling. “Also, do you even understand how many other girls are gonna have to kiss you first before she even shows up?"

"I don't care." The other boy shrugs, picking his sharpie back up and twirling it between his fingers. "I'll give them a peck, or I'll swerve at the last second and catch their cheek instead. Either way, my lips stay mostly reserved for her."

"Mostly reserved." Jay echoes, staring at him. "Do you hear yourself right now?"

"Loud and clear." He drops back into his seat. "Now stop hovering and go tell people it's a dollar a kiss."

–

DAY ONE:

Okay, so maybe Jungwon should have thought this through. Within twenty minutes of Jay leaving, all he’s received was weird looks and the campus security guard approaching him, all up on his ass about ‘not having a permit’. Since when did you need a permit to spread some love? Damn.

Second of all, why is no one donating? The sign says kiss for a cause. Is no one a good samaritan anymore?

After two hours, someone finally comes up to him. She introduces herself as a first-year, talking fast about how this is going to be her first kiss ever and how she can't believe it's happening at a random table on a random Tuesday. Jungwon should probably find that sweet, or endearing, but with the way she keeps staring at his mouth without blinking, he's getting the heebie jeebies. Still, a customer is a customer, so he plants his elbows on the table, puckers up, and leans in. 

She kisses him for far too long and with way too much enthusiasm, her mouth covering more of his face than just his lips, until there's spit on his chin, his cheek, even near his nose. He pulls back the second it feels acceptable to, as in, after ten seconds, and forces a smile onto his face. He had no idea it was possible to be so slobbery in such a short period of time.

He can’t even use his sweater sleeve to wipe off the remnants of her germs and the wetness on his face because, as she’s walking away, the girl keeps turning around and staring at him. Most likely just gained his first stalker. 

A girl a few feet away, who had clearly watched the whole thing happen, walks up next with an expression caught between amusement and pity. She drops a dollar in the jar, leans in and gives him the briefest peck imaginable, so brief that even after she's left, he keeps replaying it in his head, genuinely unsure if their lips even touched.

So, the first two customers were rough, but hey, it should only get better from here, he reassures himself. Once you’ve hit rock bottom, there’s nowhere else to go but up! 

—

Well, whoever thought of that quote is a big fat liar. There is further than rock bottom, Jungwon thinks as he nurses a now bruised lip. Some emo goth chick must have decided that he would be her victim of the day, clamping her teeth down so hard on his lower lip that he yelped into her mouth and tasted copper. What’s worse, she didn’t even apologize! All she did after was swipe her thumb along the wound, smearing the blood. He’s also 99% sure he saw Sunghoon filming him from the corner of his eye while that was going down, too.

Talk about dehumanizing. 

By hour four, Jungwon has stopped counting customers and started counting regrets instead. He drops his forehead flat onto the table beside the donation jar and stays there, refusing to lift his head even as people— potential customers— pass by. This was a mistake, plain and simple. He's probably going to end up on the university's social media accounts by tomorrow, and from then on everyone will know him as the lame kissing booth guy who only scraped together fifteen dollars.

Fifteen dollars isn't even enough to buy a decent Chipotle bowl with guac. Who eats Chipotle with no guac?!

And where the hell are you? Are you sick? He’s no stalker, but he does know that you take this path between classes. Suddenly, a horrific thought takes over his mind. What if you did pass by, but were so icked out that you ran away? Oh god, he groans. That’s definitely what happened. There go his chances with you. 

Perhaps the gods were looking out for him though, because out of nowhere, he hears birds chirping. Then, as he lifts his head, he feels the warmth of the sun on his face and sees the clouds above him part right on cue. A cluster of flowers nearby, ones he's fairly certain weren't blooming five minutes ago, unfurl all at once. 

What could— wait. 

In all of his years on earth, Jungwon has never believed in the supernatural. But there, in all your glory, stands you, an angel. 

Relief floods his entire nervous system, and before he can control himself, he jumps out of his seat, calling your name. At the sound of it, your head turns, and you make eye contact. Upon seeing him, your mouth stretches wide into a smile, one he thinks is absolutely gorgeous. Only, to his absolute horror, he watches as you take in his current predicament, and your expression goes from joy to confusion, to something he can only describe as WTF. "Jungwon?" You blink, taking a slow step closer. "Why are you doing a kissing booth?"

“Oh, you know,” he shrugs, trying to play it cool. “Just tryna do some good, help those in need. The whole shabang.”

“Thats…,” You trail off, eyes scanning him up and down as you try to find the right words. He really hopes you can’t see the sweat beginning to build up at his hairline. “...Cool.”

Chuckling, he nods along, shoving his hands into his pant pockets. “Yeah, nothing like doing my part, ya feel?”

“So how much money have you made so far?”

As much as he does not want you to know how many people he’s kissed— after all, he wouldn't want you to get jealous— he also can’t hide the state of his lips, swollen, puffy and also a little splotchy. “... Fifteen bucks.”

“Wow!” You exclaim, lifting your hands, “Not bad!”

Jungwon rubs the back of his neck, flustered, and mumbles something under his breath, too quiet to actually reach you.

"What was that?" You inch forward a bit. "Didn't catch it."

"I said." He clears his throat, rushing the words out. "Would you want to donate? To the cause, I mean."

"Oh!" Your face lights up immediately. "Sure!"

Setting your bag on the ground, you drop to your knees, searching through it for your wallet. His heart inflates at the action of you so eagerly wanting to offer him money just for a smooch. Also, why is the sight of you kneeling in front of him kinda… ahem.

He's about to say some corny line about how, for you, it’ll be free, when you stand back up and hand him a crisp twenty-dollar bill. If he was smitten for you before, then he’s absolutely gone for you now.

"You want twenty kisses?" He's already wiping his (still, and even more so now) sweaty hands on his pants. "I can absolutely make tha–" 

"No, no, no!" Both your hands shoot up before he can finish, waving frantically. "I just want to make a difference!" 

Like a balloon deflating, Jungwon’s heart sinks and shrinks down into a flat puddle of nothing. “Ah,” he swallows. “Got it."

His lips are pursed in a tight line as he folds the bill, slipping it into the donation jar. “Thank you for your help,” he says dully, monotone. 

“No problem!” You give him one last soft smile and a small thumbs up. “Good luck!”

—

DAY TWO:

“So, did your plan work?”

“If it had worked, would I be doing this shit again?”

“I’ll take that as a no.”Jay snickers as he once again finds his friend setting up the kissing booth. Of course, he figured nothing happened based on the dejected way Jungwon returned to the apartment, but he didn’t expect him to try again.

“There has to be another way,” he says, crossing his arms.

Jungwon doesn't even look up from the sign he's re-taping to the table leg. "Such as?" 

“Like I said yesterday, just be straight up with her.” The only response Jay gets is a fat middle finger. 

—

His prediction was right. Jungwon landed on the campus Instagram page last night, and today, not only are there more people, there's an actual crowd surrounding him. He can spot most of his friends scattered through it, not in line, thank god, but just there for what he assumes passes as moral support. For extra precautions, but he even went to the security office and secured a permit, so now if he gets questioned again, he’ll have something to shove in their faces. 

He rolls his shoulders back and steels himself, working his jaw side to side. This morning, in a moment of what he now recognizes as peak desperation, he'd sat on the edge of his bed and watched a ten-minute lip workout video on YouTube uploaded in 2011, following along with exercises to prepare himself for the onslaught ahead. He'd felt ridiculous doing it, and if Jay or Jake had walked in on him… it would have been more embarrassing than getting caught beating his meat. 

“Alright, open for business!”

The moment the words leave his mouth, the line surges forward all at once, girls elbowing past each other to close the gap. "Ladies, ladies!" He throws both hands up, leaning back slightly as the table wobbles under the pressure of someone's hip bumping into it. "One at a time, please!"

This is going to be a long day. 

It had gotten to a point where his friends, who had shown up purely to spectate, found themselves dragged into service as 'bodyguards', forming a loose human barrier with linked arms and a lot of pleading to keep the line from collapsing entirely.

Eventually, even that wasn't enough. Jungwon, red-faced and gasping between customers, finally called out for backup, and Jake stepped up first, volunteering to put his lips to good use. Riki followed not long after, then Sunoo, and even Sunghoon offered himself up to be pimped out.

An actual rotating schedule formed, fifteen minutes per person, and before he knew it, the measly fifteen dollars he had accumulated the day before ballooned to over five hundred, the crumpled bills and loose change spilling from out of the donation jar. 

Even the kisses themselves had calmed down considerably too, most girls opting for quick, harmless pecks on the cheek. Every so often, someone would try to sneak in a little more tongue than expected, but by that point, all of them had simply accepted it as part of the job. Plus, Jungwon got good at making sure his mouth stayed as closed as possible throughout the whole ordeal.

Still, there was no you. 

He didn't see you at all during the seven hours he manned the booth. You could very well have come by when he was on one of his breaks and kissed another one of the boys, but he’s too scared to ask them for confirmation. Rather, he silently takes down everything while Jake stands off to the side, currently talking to a few girls who stayed back, and Riki slumps on the chair, playing on his phone. Sunoo dipped when the event ended, citing needing to take some ginger turmeric shots to cleanse his mouth; although Jungwon’s pretty sure that’s not what they're made for. 

Regardless, he’s exhausted. And as he puts the last of the booth in his enormous IKEA bag, he hears his name and turns to find you approaching, grinning. "I heard today was a huge success!" 

"Yeah, it was." He swings the bag over his shoulder, glancing back to give his two friends a quick wave goodbye. "Want to walk back with me?"

"Totally. Here, lemme take this from you." You reach for the folded table, tucking it under one arm to alleviate how much weight he has to carry. Grateful, he whispers a thank you. 

The two of you walk together in silence for a few moments before you speak up, "I'm honestly impressed.”

"Me too! The outcome today was unprecedented." 

"Are you going to do it again tomorrow?"

"Uh,” he hesitates. "Honestly, I'm not sure yet."

"Well." You glance sideways at him, a small smile tugging at your mouth. "I'm sure you're feeling pretty gassed up right now, no? Did you see how many girls wanted to kiss you today?"

His grin falters just slightly, his gaze meeting yours. "Yeah, but the one girl I actually wanted to kiss me hasn't done it yet."

Unbeknownst to him, you stop walking as you hear that, feet rooted to the pavement, and it actually takes him a few steps before he notices you're no longer beside him. Pivoting in his spot, he finds you standing there, eyes wide and staring.

"...Are you talking about me?"

"Yup." He replies confidently, popping the p. Your face goes warm, and you duck your head as you hurry to catch back up with him, falling into step beside him with a shy smile that remains for the rest of the walk. When you both make it outside his apartment, he lets the bag fall from his grasp, and you set the table down beside it, both of you straightening up at the same time to face each other.

"I only paid for twenty bucks worth of kisses,” you murmur.

He takes a step closer. "That," his voice is low, his breath fanning over your lips, "I can work with."  

Then, he’s closing what little distance was left between you, kissing you slowly and deeply, his fingers curling into where your shirt falls on your hips. It's a long while before either of you finally pulls back, both gasping softly for air. He rests his forehead against yours, eyes still closed, chest rising and falling as he refills his lungs.

"One," he breathes out, and you don’t have any time to respond, because he dives back in for number two. 

—

DAY THREE:

Technically, there is no day three. That is, not for Jungwon, at least. 

He's otherwise occupied, having found himself one particularly loyal customer, so loyal that he's granted her a permanent discount on all future kisses, free of charge, indefinitely. Some might call that poor business, but he considers it the best deal he's ever made.

In his absence and after the events of the day before, the rest of the boys have arrived at the same realization: this is, in fact, an excellent gig, mostly on account of the money. So there they are, lined up behind the folding table, waiting for the last of them, Jay, to officially let the kissing commence.

---

a/n: i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it!!

he loves seeing the ring on you, period. but around his dick, freshly manicured nails scratching up and down his length making him twitch? trust it’s his new favourite thing, he daydreams of the sight. your hand pumps him so slowly but he cannot even be mad, you look so gorgeous sitting on the floor, staring up at him with the most beautiful smile. he wants to see the rings at all times, going so far to twist the hand that’s around his dick just to have it on full display. “you know it’s there, it’s not like it’ll disappear,” you giggle at his actions. he hums, head falling back at your teasing squeezes. “nu-uh, look at me,” you snicker. “you want the ring on display, come look at it.” his eyes open, low lidded and filled with bliss as the fixate on your hand on him. you squeeze a little harder with your next pump and his brows furrow, jaw going slack as a delicious mix of moans and whines escape him. and what kind of fiance would you be if you didn’t want your future husband to absolutely crumble under your touch?the diamond clad finger, the one that he’s fixated on travels up his length, cruelly slow, before brushing over his sensitive tip. he hisses at the cool metal, hips bucking up, desperate for more friction. “feels good, hm?” “fuck baby so fucking good,” he moans back, voice laced with need. his prase your greatest motivation, your hand starts speeding up again while your ring finger stays circling the tip. you’ve heard sunghoon blissed out hundred of times before, yet you can’t help yourself admiring his features and of course he notices. “gonna make me feel shy if you keep looking me like that baby.” you giggle, empty hand reaching for his neck to pull him down for a kiss. messily, his lips slammed onto yours, a mix of your and his saliva dropping down your chin. his cock twitches under your hand, a sign that he was close and your other hand starts wrapping around the base. the feeling of both of your hands make him suck in a sharp breath between his teeth before he bites down on your bottom lip. moments later, the sweetest high pitched whine escapes him as you can feel his legs tense up. you swallow his moans and pants, guiding him through his climax before he slumps against you. after catching his breath he leaned back, pushing his sweaty hair out of his eyes. “if i hadn’t already, i’d put a ring on your finger right now.”

ꜰɪᴀɴᴄᴇ́!ꜱᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ says yes to everything during wedding planning, he just wants you to be happy.

sunghoon has always been the type of boyfriend. eventually you didn’t even have to ask for it, he saw you look at something and he could tell by your face and body language if you wanted it or not. he calls it his hoon-sense, something you tease him for relentlessly. but he takes pride in it. takes pride in knowing what you think without language. so you best believe that when you pick out the venue, he doesn’t even leave the car when he saw the critical look on your face. “okay, i’ll text the wedding planner .we’ll try the other location.” baffled, you look at him. “hoon, we haven’t even seen the inside.” “yes and you have been looking like you drank sour milk ever since we drove by the concrete jungle of houses just now,” he shoots back with a raised brow. you cringe, “i tried to not be too judgy, but i just th—” “baby you have no reason to explain yourself, you deserve a perfect wedding.” at that, your heart squeezes. you place a hand on his cheek, his body now turning to you. “as long as you’re gonna be there with me saying yes that’s all i need.” a sickeningly sweet smile spreads on his face as he leans in to press a kiss to your lips. “nothing in the world could stop me from being there.”

ꜰɪᴀɴᴄᴇ́!ꜱᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ makes even something like wedding cake tasting kinky.

now, i have to elaborate that the both of you went to countless bakers, desperate to find the perfect cake. but it just so happens that you both are extremely indecisive when it comes to cake flavours. so instead of driving all over the country, spending days on end trying to find the perfect mix you just ordered the cake home for easier comparison. at first, it was just sitting down on the couch, forks in hand while digging into the collection of cakes in front of you. after day three it got boring, so what better thing to do than to get a little kinky with it. afterall, sunghoon has been meaning to try out food play! that’s how you found yourself lying on the bed, chest covered in both chocolate and lemon cake, while your soon to be husband licks circles around your nipples. “mmm, i like this combination actually,” he mumbles against your skin, while you writhe under him. his strong hands are placed on your waist, pinning you down so that you cannot escape he bites, licks and kisses. what began with carefully placed frosting on your skin soon turned into mushed cake spread on your stomach and thighs. his mouth and hands seem to be everywhere at the same time and you lose yourself in his touch, in his warmth. his tongue circles the inside of your thigh, licking up a slow stripe up to clean the frosting off of you. he’s so close to your throbbing pussy and you whine in desperation. sunghoon’s head perks up, almost cooing at the pout on your face. “my pretty girl, didn’t mean to tease you 'm sorry.”, he says before dipping down again, tongue darting out to circle around your swollen clit. you yelp, legs snapping against his head, caging him between your thighs. he smiles into your pussy, tongue flattening to lap at the juices spilling out of you. “sweetest thing in the world,” he mumbled barely audible. “just gonna have you cum all over our cake hm?” you sob at the combination of filthy words and obscene sounds he’s producing while practically making out with your pussy. your nails dig into his bicep, one hand grasping his hair for dear life and he moans at the sting. “can’t have anybody else tasting you though, no you’re all mine. all mine to taste, all mine to love.” yeah he’s gonna keep ordering more cakes just to keep doing this.

ꜰɪᴀɴᴄᴇ́!ꜱᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ once saw your ring lie on the bedside table and got so scared that you're calling the engagement off.

it had been a stressful day since the second he woke up. he had rushed into the shower, stumbled into the kitchen to make some coffee and went on a hunt for his belt. yet no matter how stressed or busy he is, he always and i mean always gives you a kiss before he leaves. you were still buried under the covers and he pressed the lightest kiss to your temple. not daring to rip you out of your sleep. after a gruel day, all he wanted was to lie in bed, in your arms and hear all about your day. when he couldn’t find you in the living room or kitchen he didn’t panic, you’re probably already in bed, it was late in the end. but the bedroom was dark, not a sign of you. he was about to continue his search when he saw something sparkling near your side of the bed. with horror he realised what it was. your ring. not just any ring, but your engagement ring. sunghoon has experienced moments of fear before, but nothing could ever compare to the feeling of pure dread and terror that ram through his veins that moment. did you change your mind? what could he have done that caused this? with his hands in bis hair, he read over your last messages in his phone. nothing out of the ordinary. his panicked eyes scanned the room for a letter, had there been one in the kitchen? “hoon?” he swear his soul left him for a moment before running over to you, clutching you tight to his chest. “whoa, are you okay? rough day at work?” “i thought you were gone.” his voice trembling as tears ran down his face. you leaned back, looking at him with a baffled expression. “what?! i was in the shower.” only now did he realise your wet hair, the towel around your body. “oh…” the sight of him broke your heart, he looked so broken. your hands gently cupped his face, thumbs brushing away the tears on his cheek. “how did you come to that conclusion my love?” you questioned softly. he blinked, eyes travelling over to your bedside table. “your ring.” “oh hoon,” you cooed. “i always take it off when i go shower, im scared to drop it in the shower or the sink. have you never noticed before?” the poor man in front of you could only shake his head, still recovering from the shock. “my baby, come here.” you took his hand, leading him over to the bed. without words, his head on top of your chest, arms gripping onto your waist for dear life. it took a while before his shoulders un-tensed exhaustion taking over as he felt his eyes grow heavy. “let’s get ready for bed sleepy boy,” you whispered against his brow bone. the entire nighttime routine his hands didn’t leave you for a second, eyes either on your face or the ring that finally glistened on your finger again.

ꜰɪᴀɴᴄᴇ́!ꜱᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ practices his vows in front of the mirror and starts crying every single time.

he would’ve taken this to the grave. the countless times of him trying to read his vows out loud, which are written on tear stained paper since he refused to read his biggest love confession off his phone. after a good three weeks of practicing, he made it until maybe the first quarter of the page before his eyes were so tear-filled he couldn’t see anymore. not that he didn’t have the vows memorised, no at this point they just fly around his brain at random times, whether that is while grocery shopping, doing the dishes or something simple like showering. the problem was that he gets so choked up at the thought of you standing in front of him in a wedding dress, looking at him with those gorgeous eyes, about to seal your vow of eternal love. the poor man is gripping the edge of the sink, taking deep breaths through his nose, slowly exhaling out of his mouth. his tears are beginning to pool at the bathroom floor when a knock makes him snap out of his mindset? “you okay in there man?” second later jungwons concerned face pop up behind the bathroom door. it was quite comical, the way both of them were just staring at each other. jungwons eyes glanced down, spotting the crumbled up paper in sunghoons hand. “ah,” jungwon exhaled. “vow practice?” before the poor guy knew what happened, the elder broke down in tears again. safe to say that the plans were cancelled and jungwon questioned the well being of his friend. at least it gave him material for the man of honour speech.

 ꜰɪᴀɴᴄᴇ́!ꜱᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ loves to call you his future wife.

it’s never “meet my fiance” with this man. no, “this is my future wife” is this mans favourite vocabulary after he proposed. before, he always called you his last name instead of your actual one, he loved the sound of it way too much. now, the energy doubled. he brought you up in every moment already, but now it’s him full on cheesing,full set of teeth showing and him putting an extra emphasis on the wife. you’re out ordering some food? after ordering for himself he goes “and for my future wife”, looking at you expectantly. in case you got takeout he puts your name down with his last name, you know, so that you can get used to it! he also forces you to practice your new signature. “baby, you’ll want to practice for signing the papers! i know you. if it doesn't end up looking how you want it on our wedding day, you’ll get upset. you look cute when your face goes all pouty, but that’s not the expression i want to see on your face on our wedding, okay?” but don’t believe this is a quick deal. nope, expect to be sitting down for 30 minutes minimum a day. “revisit the loops maybe? how about you do a bigger swoop on that letter? what if we try a more cursive approach with this one?” and you cannot even bring yourself to be mad at him because he’s just beaming up at you with the sparkliest eyes :(

ꜰɪᴀɴᴄᴇ́!ꜱᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ keeps trying to guess what your wedding dress will look like.

of course he knows your style, heck he knows every tiny thing about you ! but a wedding dress is just so specific.just what exact shade will you choose? how long will your train be? will you wear your hair up, down, half up half down? this man is constantly on pinterest, trying to find clues. after you blocked him from seeing your account, which led him to make a whole new account. after privatising that board, he jut downright tries to steal your phone. you’re gonna find yourself wrestling this man on the couch, whole bodies entangled as you try to hide your phone from him. be warned, he will try to distract you with kisses every chance he gets! “hoon, no! it’s a surprise, only my mum and my best friend know and i want to keep it that way.” a little breathless, he hovers over you. eyes sparkling, wide grin on his face; god he was so devastatingly handsome. “i know what you’re trying to do…” you murmured. “it’s not gonna work, put the puppy eyes away lover boy.” with a dramatic sigh he flops down, strong arms besides you making sure he doesn’t crush you. his head nuzzles into the crook of your neck and you can feel him take a slow,deep breath in. “whatever,” he mumbles against your skin, sending little shivers down your spine. “ you’ll look beautiful no matter what you wear.” your hand mindlessly starts playing with some of his hair strands, nails softly dragging over his scalp and he releases a sigh of content. his arms wrap around your waist, making sure you’re physically as close as possible. “still not showing you,” you whisper before pressing a kiss on his temple. “come on!”

⊹

Sunday 5:00 p.m. The worst possible time to be writing an essay worth forty percent of your grade.

Your paper is due tomorrow at exactly 12:00 p.m., and after staring at the same paragraph for twenty minutes, you've managed to write three sentences. One of them isn't even good.

Your desk is covered in loose papers, highlighters a half-finished bag of chips. The late afternoon sun shines through your pink curtains window.

Bzzzt.

Your flip phone vibrates against the wooden desk, again. For the seventh time in one hour. You let out a long sigh, rubbing your forehead before forcing yourself to keep typing.

— 

Exactly twenty-six hours and forty minutes ago, you broke up with Riki. And apparently Riki is taking it like the world has ended.

Not that this is anything new. 

Yesterday had started out perfectly normal. You, Riki and the rest of the friend group had spent the afternoon hanging around downtown like always. Sunghoon brought drinks, Sunoo had a cheap disposable camera, everyone was sharing fries from the same cheap diner.

Riki, however...

He woke up and chose to be the biggest pain in your ass imaginable.

Every five minutes he'd place his foot slightly in front of yours while you were walking, making you stumble off the sidewalk before laughing like it was the funniest thing he'd ever seen.

He stole your lip gloss. He stole your sunglasses. He stole your flip phone and held it above his head because he knew you couldn't reach it, grinning while you jumped and threatened to kick him in the nuts.

He kept making the dumbest jokes known to mankind, laughing so hard at his own jokes that he nearly fell off his skateboard, while the rest of the group just stared at him in silence.

At one point he even yanked your precious Juicy Couture handbag off your shoulder and skated away with it, forcing you to chase him for nearly two blocks.

You had warned him, lots of times.

"Riki, I'm dead serious."

"Okay, okay."

Five minutes later he was flicking the back of your ear.

Eventually you'd had enough. You stopped walking, folded your arms and looked him dead in the face.

"That’s it. We’re done. I'm breaking up with you."

His grin disappeared for maybe... two seconds. Then he laughed. "You say that every month."

"I'm serious this time. I’m so done with you."

"You don't even mean it."

"I do."

He squints his eyes. "You'll call me tonight."

"I will not."

"You definitely will."

You stared at him for another second before snatching your bag back from his shoulder.

"Watch me." Then you walked away.

Your relationship has always been ridiculous. One week you're inseparable, the next you're "done forever." Then somehow you're holding hands again three days later like nothing happened. And it always happens over the dumbest things imaginable.

— 

Twenty-six hours later...

Bzzzt.

"Oh my god, shut up!"

When you hear that stupid custom ringtone you installed for him again, you grab the flip phone off your desk and toss it backwards onto your bed without even looking. It’s impossible to break anyway. It lands somewhere in the pile of blankets, still buzzing.

You're not answering that.

This is... the fifth time you've broken up? Maybe the sixth? Honestly, you've lost count.

Then finally, your fingers move across the keyboard without stopping. One paragraph turns into two, then somehow you're already halfway through the next one. You don't even realize you've been writing for almost twenty minutes.

Then—

Riiing. Riiing.

Not Riki's ringtone, the default one. You stop typing and stare at your screen for another second before sighing. You push your chair back with a groan and walk over to your bed, digging through the blankets until your fingers find your flip phone.

Jake. You frown and flip it open. "...Jake? Hello?"

"Yooo." Jake sounds irritatingly cheerful. "How's the essay going?"

You narrow your eyes immediately. "...Bad."

"Damn. Uh... How's your mom?"

You blink. "She's.. fine?"

"Cool."

"Okay..."

You slowly pull the phone away from your ear to look at it. "...Jake?"

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing?"

"...Nothing."

Then you hear muffled voices. "No, give it—"

"Dude—" A little scuffle and then "...Hello?"

You immediately close your eyes. "Oh my God. Seriously?"

It's Riki. "Hi."

"You are unbelievable. You're calling me from Jake's phone now?"

"My phone isn't working."

"It is working."

"...Yeah."

"So why are you using Jake's?"

"'Cause you won't answer mine."

You let out the biggest sigh imaginable. "You're ridiculous. What do you want?"

"...Did you mean it yesterday?" He asks, you don't answer. "When you said that we're over."

You stare out your bedroom window. "Yup."

He sighs. “…Can I come over?"

Your head snaps up. "Don't you dare."

"What if we just—"

"Riki."

"Five minutes."

"No." Riki sighs. "Three?"

"No."

"I'll stand outside."

"No."

"I won't even come in. I just wanna ta—"

You suddenly start making static noises into the phone. "Krrshhh—"

"...What?"

"Kghhh— sorry— can't— hear—"

"Y/n?"

"Connection's— really— ba—"

"Are you kidding m—"

"KRRSHHHH—"

"Y/n. Hello? Hello?"

Click. You snap the flip phone shut. "Idiot."

—

Across town, Riki slowly lowers Jake's phone from his ear. "She hung up on me."

Then, with a dramatic groan, he lets himself fall backwards onto Jake's bed and throws and arm over his face. "I'm gonna die."

Jake doesn't even look up from the game controller in his hands.

"Yeah man, I think she's serious this time. You fucked up."

Riki drags both hands down his face. "I can't lose her, Jake."

Jake pauses his game and looks at Riki. "You know what your problem is?" Riki stares at the ceiling. "What."

"You act like she's your best friend when you’re around everyone else."

"What?"

"You never act like she's actually your girlfriend." Riki frowns. "I do."

"No." Jake points at him with the controller. "You annoy her all the time and you never listen to her.”

"I flirt."

"You steal her stuff Riki, that’s real mature."

"I give it back. I make her laugh."

"You make yourself laugh." Jake sighs. "Dude… you gotta stop acting like she's just someone you keep around to mess with."

"She's not." Riki turns his head toward him. "She's what I love most in the world."

Jake nods once. "Then tell her that. And maybe stop acting like a toddler every time she's around." Riki groans into his hands again.

--

Twenty-five minutes later Riki rolls to a stop in front of your house.

The wheels of his skateboard scrape against the pavement before he flicks it up with his foot, catching it without even looking. He leans it against the brick wall beside your front door and exhales.

The small window beside the door reflects his face and he takes a look at himself. His beanie comes off and he runs a hand through his black hair a few times, trying to make it look at least a little less messy before pulling the beanie back on.

Then his eyes drop to his jeans that are hanging halfway down his ass. He grabs the waistband and pulls them up a little. 

He can practically hear your voice already.

"Riki, pull your damn pants up. Your whole butt is out."

A tiny smile tugs at the corner of his mouth.

He straightens his jacket, takes one last breath and presses the doorbell.

...

Nothing. He waits. Still nothing, so he presses it longer.

...

Silence. He presses it one more time.

"Y/n?"

His patience lasts about ten more seconds before he starts knocking.

"Y/n."

Knock. Knock. Knock. "I know you're home."

He bangs his fist on the door now. "Come on."

Still nothing.

"For fuck's sake..." With a sigh, he takes a few steps backwards and looks up toward your bedroom window. Maybe he can see if you're in there. When he steps back, he accidentally bumps shoulders with a woman walking her dog.

"Oh— sorry."

"It's alright."

She follows his eyes to the upstairs window, then looks back at him with a knowing smile.

"Hm. Maybe try climbing it again."

Riki lets out an awkward laugh. "I guess..."

She continues walking without another word. Riki watches her for a second, completely confused.

It’s just your neighbour and she definitely saw him sneaking through your bedroom window the last time the two of you "broke up." But Riki doesn’t know that.

Meanwhile, you're completely oblivious.

Your essay is finally coming together. Britney Spears is blasting through your iPod earbuds while your foot taps against the floor beneath your desk. You're actually getting somewhere.

Then—

Tick.

Something taps against your bedroom window. You pause for a second, taking one earbud out.

"Y/N!"

Your eyebrows knit together. "...No."

"Y/N!"

You slowly close your eyes. "You've got to be kidding me..."

You push your chair back and walk over to the window. The second you slide it open and stick your head outside, there he is standing in your front yard, hands shoved in his hoodie pocket, looking way too pleased with himself.

"Uhh.. what did I say," you yell down at him, "about coming near my house?!"

He cups his hands around his mouth. "Baby, I just wanna talk!"

"We already talked!"

"No we didn't!"

"Yes we did!"

"You broke up with me!"

"Yeah, and?!"

"I didn't get to say anything!"

You throw your hands up. "What is there to say?"

"I'll make it up to you!"

"You say that every time!"

"This time I mean it!"

"You also say that every time!"

He groans loudly enough for the whole street to hear. "Y/n, come on!"

"No!"

"Five minutes!"

"Go away!"

He looks around dramatically before pointing toward the rainpipe running up the side of your house. "...Don't make me climb."

Your eyes immediately widen. "Don't."

"Then let me in."

"No."

He starts walking toward the rainpipe. "Riki."

He keeps walking. "I'm doing it."

"Riki."

"I'm climbing."

"You are not."

He grabs the pipe with both hands. "Watch me."

"Riki!"

One foot comes off the ground, he starts pulling himself up.

"Oh my God..."

"Last chance, y/n!"

"Stop it!"

He climbs another few inches.

"Riki!" You pinch the bridge of your nose. "...Fine!"

He immediately stops climbing. "Really?"

"Yes!"

A huge grin spreads across his face.

"But—" You point downstairs. "Front door."

"...Aw."

"Front. Door."

He sighs dramatically. You roll your eyes so hard it almost hurts.

Then you slide the window shut, the second it clicks closed, you let your forehead fall against the glass. You groan loud enough for yourself to hear through the window. "Why... why."

Taking one long, reluctant breath, you push yourself away from the window. Then you leave your room to go let your ex-boyfriend into your house.

You swing the front door open and look at him with your Arms crossed and one eyebrow already raised. He stands there with his, beanie pulled low over his forehead, hands shoved awkwardly into the pockets of his hoodie.

The second he sees you, he smiles. You don't.

"What do you want?"

"Hi." He scratches the back of his neck. "...Can I come in?"

You stare at him for another second before stepping aside with a dramatic sigh. You don't answer, you're already halfway to the stairs and he follows after you.

"So... I wanna talk."

"I figured." You reach the top of the stairs. "Then talk."

"I mean... properly."

You push your bedroom door open. "You better be fast." He looks around. "Why?"

"'Cause I'm busy."

"Busy doing what?"

You walk over to your desk. "My essay."

He snorts, like he doesn’t believe you’re serious. You slowly turn around completely silent. One eyebrow lifts and you just stare at him.

His smile disappears. "Oh." He straightens up immediately. "...Right."

You nod toward the middle of the room. "So? What did you wanna talk about?"

Riki hesitates for a second before rubbing the back of his neck again.

"...I want you to take me back."

You close your eyes. Then let out the longest sigh he's ever heard.

"If that's all you're here for..." You point toward the hallway. "you can leave."

"No, wait." He takes a step forward. "Please."

You don't look impressed.

"I don't even know why you broke up with me."

That makes you stop. Slowly you turn around and you look at him like he's the dumbest person you've ever met.

"...Seriously?"

He blinks. "...Yeah?"

You let out one short laugh. "You might wanna sit down for this."

You didn’t mea it literally. But Riki, somehow convinced he's about to receive the lecture of a lifetime, obediently walks over to your bed and slowly sits down on the edge.

You have to stop yourself from laughing. Instead, you fold your arms.

"Yesterday."

He nods.

"You held my phone above your head. You stole my lip gloss. You took my bag and skated away with it. You tackled me while we were walking, you almost made me eat concrete."

He frowns. "I caught you."

"Barely." You say, and you continue. "You made fun of me."

"I teased you." Riki comments.

"You flicked my ear, it hurt. And every single joke you made yesterday was also painfully unfunny."

"I thought they were funny."

"Just you, yeah."

Then he frowns.

"So..." He gestures vaguely with both hands. "You broke up with me because I was messing around with you for one day?"

You scoff so loudly he almost flinches.

"One day?" You let out a dry laugh. "One day?"

You sigh and continue your list of thins you dislike about him.

"You never listen. I tell you to stop doing something and you keep doing it because you think it's funny. And you don't know what the word 'no' means."

He sighs. "Y/n—"

"No. You interrupt me constantly."

"..."

"You never take anything seriously. Your pants always hang halfway down your ass."

He instinctively looks down at them. "They're supposed to."

"They're falling off."

He opens his mouth again. You don't even let him start.

"You smoke. Cigarettes, weed. You constantly smell like smoke."

He looks down at his hoodie and sniffs it. "I smell alright."

You raise an eyebrow. "You smell like an ashtray." He quietly stops sniffing himself.

"And you spend more time on that stupid skateboard than you do with me."

"I don't—"

"You do."

"I literally—"

"You. Do."

Every single time he tries to defend himself, you cut him off before he gets more than two words out.

Normally, by now, he'd have completely checked out. He'd be picking at the ruffles on your pillows, spinning one of the little charms hanging from your lamp, messing with your lip gloss collection. Doing literally anything except listening. 

But not today, today he just sits there looking at you. Actually letting every word sink in.

Until you finally run out of things to say. Then Riki rubs both hands together.

"Okay." He nods once. "…I have complaints too."

You fold your arms. "Oh?" One eyebrow lifts. "Let's hear them."

"Uh..." His confidence immediately disappears. "Well... you..." He scratches his cheek. "You wear... too much perfume."

You frown. "...What?"

He points at you awkwardly. "Your perfume."

"...Yeah?"

"It's..." He shrugs. "Strong."

You stare at him. "So your complaint... is that I smell too good?"

"No. I just mean—"

"You don't like my perfume?"

"It's just... a lot."

You blink twice, then slowly shake your head. "Whatever." You turn back toward your desk. "I'm not even entertaining that."

You start sorting through the pile of papers scattered beside your keyboard.

"I don't know. I just..." His voice sounds softer. "...I just want you back, Y/n."

Your hands keep moving around your desk. "It's not gonna happen."

"I'll do anything." Riki says. That makes you snort. Without even looking at him, you shake your head.

"Yeah?" You shuffle another stack of papers into place.

"What are you gonna do..." You laugh to yourself. "...get on your knees and beg?"

You turn around, ready to see him still sitting on your bed. Instead… he's already lowering himself onto both knees, looking up at you. A laugh escapes before you can stop it, shaking your head as you look down at him.

"You're such a loser."

He doesn't even argue, he just starts begging.

"I'll change y/n."

The smile on your face falters just a little when you realize he’s serious.

"I'll stop acting like a kid. I'll stop smoking if you want me to."

His eyes don't leave yours.

"I know we've had our ups and downs... but I don't want that anymore. I don't wanna break up with you every month."

His voice gets quieter and the room suddenly feels slightly hotter.. "I just... I wanna love you every day, baby. Every time we're not together… I might act like I don't care. But I do, I miss you every single time."

His shoulders sink. "And I don't wanna lose you."

You haven't said a single word. You're just looking at him, your face completely blank. Then the tiniest grin starts pulling at the corner of your mouth. You are enjoying this far more than you should.

He notices. "...Don't smile."

"I'm not."

"You are. You think this is funny."

You shrug. He sighs before reaching forward and gently taking both of your hands in his. His thumbs rubs gently over your knuckles.

"Please, baby... I know I act stupid sometimes—"

"And childish," you interrupt.

He nods immediately. "Yeah."

"And irresponsible. And annoying."

"Yeah," he nods desperately. "Yeah, all of that. But I promise I'll stop, i'll be better."

He squeezes your hands gently.

"I love you more than anything in the world." He looks down for a second, almost embarrassed by what he's about to admit. "I just...I don't really know how to act around you sometimes."

"So I start joking." He continues.  "I mess around, I try to make you laugh. And then I get carried away."

His eyes find yours again. "But I can do better. I want to do better, for you."

"So..." His voice softens. "just give me one more chance. Please, Y/n. I'll spend the rest of our relationship proving you right for taking me back."

For a moment neither of you says anything. He stays on his knees. You keep holding both of his hands and look down at him, the corners of your mouth slowly lifting into a smile you try very hard to hide.

His own smile starts creeping back too, hopeful this time. He studies your face for another second before slowly standing up, his hands sliding from yours to your sides as he stands.

The height difference returns instantly, now you're the one looking up at him. You sigh dramatically and roll your eyes.

"Fine, Riki." His eyebrows lift. "I'll give you another chance."

"But—" Before you can finish, his arms wrap around your waist and he effortlessly lifts you off the floor. You let out a surprised squeal that turns into laughter.

He grins so hard his cheeks hurt. "I knew it."

He leans in and kisses you, the kind of kiss that makes both of you smile halfway through it. The second your feet touch the ground, though, your expression changes. You poke a finger firmly against the middle of his chest.

"Listen." He nods immediately.

"This is your last chance." You poke his chest again. "You mess this up... we're done."

He nods again.

"Forever. I don't care if you get on your knees, don't care if you cry, don't care how much you beg. I'm not taking you back again."

He doesn't even hesitate. "Okay."

"So don't mess it up."

"I won't."

"You promise?"

"I promise." He smiles softly.

"I won't mess up, baby." Then he leans down and presses a gentle kiss against your forehead. "I swear."

Before you can answer—

The front door downstairs slams shut. Both of you freeze.

"Y/n, honey?" your mom calls from downstairs. "We're home!"

Your eyes go wide. "Oh shit."

You immediately raise your voice. "Okay, Mom!"

You look at riki. "You have to go."

His smile disappears. "What?"

"You have to leave."

"I literally just got here."

"My parents can't know you're here."

"Why?"

You give him a look. "Because they'll spend the next hour asking me why I took you back."

He looks genuinely offended. "...What's wrong with taking me back?"

You snort. "Nothing. They just think we're exhausting. But I'll talk to them, just... not today."

He sighs. "I finally get my girl back and I'm immediately getting kicked out."

"Go."

Riki lets out the most dramatic sigh you've ever heard and slowly turns toward your bedroom door. "I can't believe this."

He reaches for the doorknob and you stop him immediately. "Riki. Window."

He looks over his shoulder. "My skateboard's at the front door."

"So?"

"My skateboard being there means they probably saw it."

You place both hands against his back and start shoving him toward the window.

"If they see you they’re gonna ask questions.” You slide the window open with a loud squeak. "So go through the window."

He looks down at the drop but e turns back to you instead of climbing out. Then he grabs your waist and pulls you against him before he kisses you.

His hand settles between your shoulder blades as he keeps pulling you closer until you're practically bending backwards over his arm. A surprised giggle escapes into the kiss. Your hands come up instinctively, cupping both sides of his face as you smile against his lips.

Footsteps creak on the stairs outside. Then your mom's voice echoes through the hallway.

"Y/n? What are you doing up there?"

Your eyes snap open and you pull back immediately.

"Still working on my essay!" you yell.

You shove Riki toward the open window and whisper-yell. "Quick, quick!"

"I'm going!" Still laughing, he awkwardly squeezes himself through the window frame, one leg dangling outside while his hoodie catches on the latch. "Oh, for fuck's sake..."

"Riki!"

"I'm stuck!"

You grab his hoodie and hook it off the latch. "There."

He pulls himself up and steals one last kiss. "See you tomorrow?"

You smile despite yourself. "Yeah, now go."

He drops onto the little ledge beneath your window, then carefully climbs down the drainpipe the rest of the way before jumping the last few feet onto the grass.

You lean on the windowsill, watching him land.

He dusts off his baggy jeans like nothing happened. Then walks over to the front of the house, grabs his skateboard from where he'd leaned it against the wall, and starts walking backwards down the path again instead of turning around. His eyes never leave yours.

Right then, the same woman walks past with her little dog. She slows for a moment, looking from Riki... to you leaning out of your bedroom window.

"Told you."

Riki lets out an awkward laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.

The woman looks up at you and you smile brightly. "Hi, Miss!"

She chuckles and continues walking. Riki looks back up at you with a confused frown. You mouth one word. "Neighbor."

His eyes widen. "Oh."

You immediately start shooing him away with little hand motions. "Go!"

He grins, he presses both hands to his lips and blows you the most exaggerated kiss you've ever seen.

"Bye, Riki."

You roll your eyes, and wave until he finally turns around, drops his skateboard onto the pavement with a loud clack, hops on, and disappears down the street.

⊹

“Eomma!” you hear from the door.

You feel Jake shift lightly next to you. Your eyes start to slightly open, the sunlight blinding you for a moment. “Eomma, wake up!” your son says, now being in the room and shaking you to get up.

You groan and sit up, stretching lightly while Jaehyun, your five year old climbs up on your bed.

Jake slowly starts to get up too, hearing your son repeating “Eomma”.

“What happened Jaehyun-ah?” you ask, your voice raspy from sleep. “I’m cold.” he says, lifting the blanket up a bit and pushing Jake.

Jake lets out a dramatic gasp, still half asleep. “Yah, why am I getting kicked in my own bed this early?”

Jaehyun ignores him completely, crawling straight into your lap and wrapping his tiny arms around you. “Appa, move.”

You can’t help but giggle a bit while Jake stares at his son in betrayal. His messy hair falls into his eyes as he rubs his tired eyes. “You only love eomma these days.”

Jaehyun nods. “Eommas warm, you’re not.”

“Okay now that’s actually rude,” Jake mutters.

You smile, pulling the warm blanket over Jaehyuns shoulders. He instantly melts against you, his cheek pressing into your chest while his small hands cling to your shirt.

Jake watches the two of you for a second before scooting closer, wrapping on arm around your waist and the other around Jaehyun. “We can group cuddle then so your eomma can keep us both warm.”

“No squishing, appa.” Jaehyun warns.

Jake pokes his son’s cheek. “You’re bossy for someone who came in here at seven in the morning.”

Jaehyun hides his face into you more. “I had a bad dream.”

The teasing in Jakes expression softens immediately. “Oh,” he brushes Jaehyuns hair back. “Why didn’t you say that at first?”

“There was a monster,” he mumbles. “A big one.”

Jake gasps dramatically again. “A monster?! And appa wasn’t there to fight it?”

“Appa you lost.”

You burst into laughter while Jake clutches his chest. “Wow. Babe, are you hearing this. My own son thinks I’d lose.”

“You cried,” Jaehyun states.

“That’s a lie.” Jake says, looking even more offended.

Jaehyun finally giggles, the sleepy clinginess fading into a better mood. Jakes smile getting wider at the sound of hearing his son laugh.

After a few more minutes of being tangled together, Jaehyun lifts his head, his chin resting on your chest, “I’m hungry.”

“Want me to get up and make pancakes?” you ask, raising your hand to move his hair from his face.

Jaehyun nods, while Jake groans at the thought of getting up.

“Why can’t we just stay asleep? It’s way too early.”

“No.” Jaehyun answers immediately, “I’m hungry.”

By any means, he wasn't experienced in real relationships. Sure, he'd hooked up with a few girls here and there, but that was all it ever was.

But for you?

God, he was willing to learn and grow if it meant giving you the love you deserved.

"I'll tell you something first," you broke the silence, absentmindedly tapping your finger against the counter.

Jungwon nodded, giving you his full attention as you began to talk.

And talk you did.

You told him everything you had told your friends.

You told him what happened when you were sixteen. Who Adrian was in your life. How you unintentionally ghosted him because you were overwhelmed, because the only love you'd ever known had been built on manipulation, and you were scared.

Scared of carrying that ghost with you forever.

You told him how you were afraid you'd make him go through the same thing, and to be frank, he didn't blame you.

Because who would blame someone who's gone through that? Someone whose only experience with love wasn't love at all.

It was manipulation disguised as affection. Control disguised as concern. Guilt disguised as compromise.

When it's the only blueprint you've ever been handed, how are you supposed to know what building something healthy is meant to look like?

You told him you weren't scared of becoming like your ex. You were scared that maybe, without realizing it, you'd ruin everything because your subconscious had grown so accustomed to emotional abuse that anything else felt undeserved.

Adrian may have only been in your life for a few months, but he'd altered the trajectory of your world — your sense of self, the way you viewed love, everything.

And with all that, Jungwon could only tear up.

Hearing you talk about your past, about how you were so young yet had to act mature because that was what your ex expected of you, broke something inside him.

"Why are you crying?" you asked, reaching over to hold his hand.

Jungwon sniffled, shaking his head as he wiped away his tears with his free hand.

"It's just," he started, staring at you with red, watery eyes that were still full of that same innocent adoration.

"You didn't deserve any of that."

The way he said it — softly with his voice trembling — was enough to make you inhale sharply.

Jungwon stood from the stool and, without hesitation, wrapped his arms tightly around you. He pulled you against his chest, burying your face in the crook of his neck as he pressed a gentle kiss to your hair.

That's when you broke.

The sob that tore from your throat was ugly and raw, carrying years of buried sadness that had been hidden for so long and was finally being set free.

Jungwon only held you tighter, his own tears slipping down his cheeks as he imagined how sixteen year old you must have felt. He couldn't bear the thought of someone treating you — the sweetest, kindest person he'd ever met — as if you were nothing more than a doll.

"It wasn't your fault," he whispered. "For staying. For all the things he blamed you for. For being sixteen."

"It was never your fault."

So you stayed there, in the middle of your apartment's kitchen, wrapped in his arms as you cried. His gentle voice somehow only made you cry harder.

You weren't used to this.

The softness.

The patience.

The kind of love that asked for nothing but your healing.

2 months later..

PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | END-

and itz a wrap !! worry not for there will be bonus chapters of them being a couple + being unhinged with their friends! plz lmk what you all wanna see :3 anyway, thank u for all who kept reading and commenting, you all were the sole drive for me to continue and finish the series. i love you all ❤️

you fall back onto the bed, fingers tangling in jake’s hair as he makes a humming sound against you, the vibrations sends sparks up your spine.

jake is good at this, always has been, but tonight he’s showing off. his tongue traces slow circles around you before flicking at your opening and dragging up, seeking out the place where you need him most.

“oh”, you whine. “oh fuck.”

“the clitoris”, he says against you, pulling his head back enough to meet your gaze, eyes becoming glossy as if he wants something more. “did you know it has over eight thousand nerve endings? the most of any part of the human body.”

“jake.” you threaten, fingers finding his temple as he continues to suck gently on your clit, his other hand splayed over the juncture of your thigh and hip.

“its educational,” he teases.

you laugh, a high pitched giggle that turns into a moan when jake sucks your clit into his mouth. your hips buck upwards as he braces himself over you.

“you’re such a nerd,” you manage to say through your moans.

“you are dating a nerd,” he says against your skin. “you knew what you were getting into.”

jake eases two fingers into you as you groan, your head falling back. he uses the stretch of his fingers to find the place deep inside you that makes your whole body twitch. his fingers are long and beautifully angled, curling in just the right way to send another pulse of sensation through you.

“see?” he murmurs, his mouth pressing a kiss to your inner thigh. “angles and vectors, all geometry.”

“shut up,” you gasp, your mouth forming an ‘o’ shape as you try to catch your breath. “ah— jake!”

“the g-spot is actually part of the clitoral structure,” he says, his fingers sliding in and out as his mouth finds your core again. “it all connects.”

“jake, i swear—”

“did you know that the clitoris is shaped like a wishbone?” he asks, tracing slow patterns along you with his tongue, working you over from bottom to top. you forget what you were about to say when he begins rolling his tongue over your clit in fast, shallow strokes.

you are so close, already writhing, and jake knows it, he always knows it. he knows your body the way he knows his textbooks, every little sound and reaction to a chapter he memorizes with devotion.

“you’re gonna come for me, baby?”

jake asks, his voice thick with something between amusement and need as his tongue skates over your thigh. “on my face? are you really going to do it? let’s test it, shall we?”

“your— fuck, glasses—!”

“forget the glasses.”

they are completely fogged over now, all opaque. its absurd, really, the way his tongue flicks over you in short bursts while his fingers curl inside you, making you dizzy with need. you can barely focus on what he says next.

“take them off,” you whine, practically begging. “jake— ”

“cant, im too busy recalling the theory of..” he says, practically purring. you find yourself laughing and whimpering at the same time.

“that doesnt even— thats not how it—”

“maybe physics isnt my strongest subject.” jake sighs dramatically before his tongue licks insistently at your folds, his fingers pumping in and out at a steady pace. he manages to ignore the fog on his glasses long enough for you to climax, shuddering and whimpering his name as your thighs shake on either side of his head. jake hums against your skin.

“come on, baby,” he groans, voice rough. “let me taste it. let me have it.”

“ah— jake!”

“i’ve got you. i’ve got you.”

your orgasm rolls over you, until you are gasping your release into the air, your back arching violently. your fingers dig into jakes scalp, his hair splayed out on either side of your hips. jake licks at you determinedly until your whimpers die down, your body limp, exhausted.

you push his head away weakly.

jake grins, finally lifting himself off of you, his chin glistening. he peeks up at you, the lenses blurred with condensation.

“see?” he says, sliding them up his nose. “perfectly functional.”

“you can’t see a thing.” you scoff.

“i can see enough, princess.”

jake leans over you, his head hovering just above your torso as he peppering kisses all over your body. you taste yourself on his lips when his glasses press against your cheek, warm and fuzzy.

you lift his head by the back of his skull, kissing him thoroughly before sliding his glasses off his face.

“hey,” he whines, blinking up at you. his lashes cast shadows across his cheeks. jake’s face is softer without the frames.

“i was going for a look.” he mumbles softly.

you raise your eyebrows, “the look was clouded nerd who cant see.”

“hey, that’s a classic aesthetic!”

you laugh, pulling him down on top of you. jake melts against you, kissing your collarbone, his fingers finding the sensitive spot at the juncture of your thigh and hip.

“i could go again,” he murmurs, voice heavy with intent. “we could run another trial. for science.”

“for science,” you repeat, laughing when jake’s fingers push into you once more, coaxing another moan from your lips as his glasses sit on the nightstand, forgotten.

the two of you were making breakfast together in his kitchen. you stood behind him while he cooked eggs,  arms wrapped around his bare waist, chin resting on his shoulders as you hummed. every few seconds you’d press a kiss to his neck or cheek.

sunghoon laughed softly when you stole a piece of fruit from the cutting board.

“you’re gonna eat everything before it’s done, baby,” he teased, squeezing your hands on his tummy. you giggled and kissed his jaw, pressing you chest against his back.

“can’t help it… you look so cute when you’re cooking.”

you both ended up eating at the counter—you sitting on the top and sunghoon standing in between your legs as you fed him pieces of bacon. he laughed at how cute you looked, and you giggled at his terrible jokes.

it felt domestic.

at work, you two couldn’t keep your hands off each other. 

in the breakroom, sunghoon had you pressed against the wall, kissing you deeply. your hands were in his hair, pulling him closer as you moaned softly into his mouth. you made the breakroom like his bedroom.

jake walked in at the wrong moment. he froze, eyes wide, then quickly looked away with a muttered, “jesus christ…” before backing out. he found it odd. weird, bizarre even to see sunghoon and you… but you, especially in this state.

he supposed he didn’t know you enough—despite knowing each other since the earliest days of jake’s life.

haewon, who had been right behind him, looked visibly uncomfortable, eyebrows furrowed as she turned and left without a word. 

you and sunghoon didn’t even notice. or even if either of you did—no fucks were given.

on the floor, you were “checking out cds” together—but really, it mostly meant him standing behind you with his arms around your waist as the two of you decided which movie to watch for the night.

even during his band practice time that you’d tag along—sunghoon spent most of it teaching you how to use his electric guitar, sitting on his lap with your back pressed flashed against his chest, sunghoon’s arms wrapped around your waist.

his members would give him a look, and so did your girl friends who shared the room.

it’s weird. it’s unlikely.

every night was spent together under the sheets. 

you loved kissing him. you could do it for hours, everywhere, anywhere—slow, deep kisses that turned hungry, soft pecks all over his face, neck, chest, or just lying there with your lips pressed against his for long moments.

you’d pull him on top of you, legs wrapped around his waist, whispering i love you between kisses like it you couldn’t bear even an inch of space between your bodies.

sunghoon wasn’t complaining. not even a little.

he had never been this happy.

waking up with you curled into his side, making breakfast together while you hugged him from behind, stolen kisses, falling asleep with your head on his chest every night—it felt like a dream he never wanted to wake up from. the constant affection, the way you looked at him… it filled every empty space he’d carried.

days turned into weeks.

and now it had been almost two months together.

“acoustic guitar?” 

you and sunghoon were sitting across from each other at a small table by the window, sharing a plate of pastries and drinks. your fingers were playing with his hand on the table—tracing his knuckles, interlacing your fingers, gently squeezing every few seconds.

you genuinely couldn’t stop touching him.

sunghoon chuckled softly, watching the way your pretty manicured fingers traced the lines on his palm. “yeah. the band’s been doing mostly acoustic sets now. the electric stuff is fun but… i don’t know, it feels different when it’s just the guitar. personal, i guess?”

you nodded, still playing with his fingers. were you even listening?

“i like when you play acoustic. your voice sounds really nice like that.”

“you think s—”

RING—!

sunghoon glanced down to his phone with its screen facing upwards—seeing jake’s contact. he simply acknowledged it before flipping his phone. 

the conversation flowed easily as it should between two lovers—about his band’s past gigs, practice, and whether he should start his own project since the band wasn’t as active anymore.

“you should,” you said, eyes sparkling. you squeezed his hand, nails lightly digging into his flesh. “you’d be amazing leading your own band. i wanna come to every show—wanna follow you everywhere you go.”

sunghoon smiled, warmth spreading through his chest. 

“of course you will.”

you picked up a piece of bread, tore a small chunk, and fed it to him with your fingers. sunghoon accepted it, lips brushing against your fingertips. he was about to do the same for you when his phone buzzed on the table.

jake was calling, again.

sunghoon sighed. “hold on, baby. it’s the second time he’s called now. i’ll be quick.”

he excused himself from the table and stepped outside to take the call. 

you watched him go, your expression shifting. your smile faded. a subtle annoyance flickered across your face as you stared at him walking away, fingers tapping lightly, impatiently on the table.

“what?” he answered, a little impatient. “i’m busy.”

“busy with yn?”

sunghoon sighed. “what do you want?"

there was a beat of hesitation on the other line.

“okay, so…” jake started. “i haven’t told anyone because i don’t know how true this goes, but i went to yn’s house the other day to pass some pie. her grandma was asking where yn is.”

sunghoon frowned, “your point?” 

“she thinks yn lives with me. thought she was sick of her. i didn’t tell her what yn said about her kicking her out but… something’s going on.”

sunghoon glanced back at you. you were staring in his direction, smiling in an unnatural, almost too–wide way. he gave a small wave. you waved back, smiling.

jake continued, voice lower. “and plus, this is just so weird, man… i’ve never seen her acting this way. i didn’t even know she liked you.”

that ticked sunghoon off—he didn’t like that. so what if it was fucking weird? so what if jake didn’t know you liked sunghoon? jake didn’t need to know everyfuckingthing there is to know in this world. just because you and him were childhood friends, it doesn’t mean you need to tell him everything.

his grip on the phone tightened. “what the hell are you trying to say?”

a beat.

“i’m just saying it’s weird,” jake replied carefully. “i’m happy for you two, really. but it’s… it’s like yn snapped into a different person.”

sunghoon looked back at you again. you were still staring at him with that same unwavering smile. it was as if you didn’t stop smiling, at all. 

jake kept going. “i don’t know what’s going on with her… or you… but i think you guys should be apart for a while. she literally hasn’t been home.”

a beat.

“hello? sunghoon?”

call ended. 

sunghoon hung up and slowly walked back to the table. he was annoyed, slightly shocked, and trying hard to hide it. his mind was still replaying jake’s words.

you looked up with him with that soft, adoring smile.

“everything okay, baby?”

he sat down, forcing a small nod. “um, yeah.”

you tilted your head, watching him carefully.

“actually, do you…”

“mmmhm…?” you hummed, leaning forward slightly. sunghoon hesitated, then shook his head. “nothing.”

you studied him for a second longer before smiling again. “hm, okay…. i have something for you.”

you reached into your bag and pulled out a small red box, sliding it across the table toward him.

sunghoon blinked. “what’s this?”

“...open it.” 

he hesitated for a moment, fingers hovering over the box, before finally opening it. inside was a beautiful gem—a deep, dark onyx with flecks that caught the light. it was attached to a simple silver chain, clearly old but well–cared for.

“oh… wow,” he murmured, genuinely surprised.

you smiled gently. “it was my grandma’s… then my mom’s, then mine. but i want to give it to you.”

sunghoon looked up at you, confused. “why are you giving it to me?” 

you reached across the table and gently took his hand. “well… it’s important to me. and so are you—but you’re way more important.”

sunghoon looked at the onyx in his palm, then back at you. “you sound like you love me,” he said, heaf–teasing, half–testing. 

you gave him an eerier, almost creepy smile—too wide, too unwavering, full of teeth. “hoonie… i love you so much. i love you more than anyone else.”

the way you said it sent a chill down his spine.

he tried to keep his voice light. “you’d be sad without me?”

you didn’t even hesitate. “i could die.”

the silence that followed was heavy. sunghoon played with the stone between his fingers, the weight of your words sinking in. then, what jake had said slipped into his mind.

i’ve never seen her acting this way. i didn’t even know she liked you.

yn’s grandma thought she was sick of her.

“yn?”

“yeah?”

“did your grandma really kick you out?”

a beat.

you blinked. then you started chuckling—low, strange sound that quickly turned into scoffing. you stood up from the table abruptly. 

“no, no, no, no, no…”

sunghoon looked up at you, confused. “what?”

you raised your voice, almost childlike in your denial. “nooooo, don’t you do that!”

the entire restaurant went quiet. heads turned, the uncomfortable tension was immediate—all eyes on your table, whispers began scattering around in the space. 

sunghoon stayed seated but reached out, gently grabbing your hand. 

“what? baby, calm down. let’s sit first, please?”

your eyes were twitching, and so were your fingers—gripping into the hem of your pretty sweater. “why does it matter?!”

he looked around, clearly embarrassed, cheeks burning as people continued staring. you pulled your hand back slightly but didn’t sit back down. 

“i thought we were having a nice date?” your voice trembled. your head jerked and tilted sideways, shoulders shuddering. to others, it might just seem like a girlfriend getting psycho over the boyfriend, but to sunghoon who knew better—

it was anything but it.

“we are! we are…” he tried to reassure you, lightly nudging you to sit down again—but you wouldn’t budge. 

“so why does it matter?” you repeated, voice getting smaller. just then, you started crying—softly, almost childishly, tears rolling down your cheeks as you stood there by the table with sunghoon’s hand holding yours.

the silence around you was deafening.

sunghoon was growing concerned and embarrassed—people were getting the wrong ideas, he could feel the judgemental eyes on him—the guy must have done something terrible to make his girlfriend cry in public.

swallowing the lump in his throat, he squeezed your hand gently. “doesn’t matter to me, baby. doesn’t matter,” he said quickly, voice low and soothing.

he finally managed to pull you toward him. you collapsed into his lap and chest almost instantly, sobbing quietly against his shirt. sunghoon wrapped his arms around you tightly, one hand rubbing slow circles on your back, the other cradling the back of your head.

you finally went quiet.

“shhh, it’s okay… i’ve got you,” he whispered into your hair, holding you close as your body trembled with hiccups. “it doesn’t matter. it doesn’t matter to me.”

the restaurant slowly, very agonisingly so, went back to their own conversations, but the uneasy atmosphere lingered. 

sunghoon kept holding and rocking you gently, completely focused on calming you down.

——

the night ended with another fucking session. tonight lasted slightly longer than usual—one sunghoon could only assume was due to your frustration from the dinner date earlier. admittedly, it was sunghoon’s fault. he shouldn’t have brought it up, shouldn’t have listened to jake, shouldn’t have put you on the spot.

if you really wanted to talk about it, you would’ve.

sunghoon accidentally woke up sometime in the middle of the night. groggily, he checked the time on his phone.

03:47

and your side of the bed was cold. 

he sat up slowly, rubbing his eyes as he looked around the dark room. at first, he thought you might have gone to the bathroom, or went down to get yourself a glass of water. but then his eyes caught something in the far corner—behind a stack of boxes.

a figure. barely visible. so faint it might’ve been nothing.

sunghoon sat up and leaned forward, squinting to get a clearer view. the figure stepped forward at his movement.

“yn…?”

you were standing there in nothing but his oversized shirt, the hem barely covering your ass. your nipples were visibly perky through the thin fabric, and your eyes reflected just enough light from the window to look almost glowing. eyeshine.

“go back to sleep,” you said softly.

sunghoon’s heart rate picked up.

“what are you doing…?”

you tilted your head slightly. a small, serene smile on your lips. 

“watching you sleep. you’re cute when you sleep, hoonie.”

then, without a word, you stepped back into the shadow of the dark corner, becoming almost invisible again. sunghoon stared at the spot where you had been for god knows how long—unable to shake the chill that ran down his spine.

“...can you come back to bed?” sunghoon asked. voice careful.

“no.”

“yn?”

“no.”

the silence that followed was thick and suffocating. sunghoon sat there in the dark of his room, heart beating faster, tummy gurgling with uneasiness. he was getting weirded out—uncomfortable—getting scared by the girl of his dreams.

you were just standing there, not doing anything. not fiddling with the hem of his shirt that you were wearing, not moving an inch, not blinking or cracking a smile. hell—sunghoon couldn’t even see your lungs expanding. 

it was… uncanny. 

he thought of calling out again—but out of nowhere, you started giggling. a childish, high–pitched sound that didn’t belong in the middle of the night, and was definitely not yours. your shoulders shook and trembled with each giggle that slipped past your lips, but you weren’t moving.

“yn—”

you were acting fucking weird when you hopped back toward the bed like nothing had happened, crawling onto him and kissing his cheek with wet, eager presses of your lips.

“you know i love you the most, right?” you whispered sweetly against his skin, voice dripping with something unhinged. “i love you sooooo much…” 

your hands roamed his bare chest possessively, cold fingers digging into his skin as you groped his bicep, squeezing like you were testing how much of him you could claim—ripped out with your bare hands.

you kissed down his neck, grazing your teeth along his pulse point—not quite biting, but close enough to send a shiver of fear through him.

“i could eat you up…” you murmured, teeth scraping harder this time, voice low and obsessive and not yours. “just…. consume every little part of you until there’s nothing left for anyone else—not even for yourself. wouldn’t that be nice? you’d be all mine. only mine. forever.”

your nails dragged down his chest as you nuzzled into his neck again, pressing your chest against him. sunghoon state frozen beneath you, heart hammering. the earlier warmth completely replaced by a deep, instinctive dread. 

with your hand roaming along his body, they travelled down until you were caressing his thigh, close to his boxer. sunghoon let out a small grunt as you licked the part where his major jugular vein pulsed, then followed it with wet, butterfly kisses along the slope of his neck.

sunghoon had never noticed or felt how sharp your canines are. 

“i wanna do it again,” you murmured, fluttering your pretty lashes with that same unhinged adoration. 

even through the fear he’d never felt before in his life, sunghoon couldn’t deny you. not when you leaned in closer, lips brushing his ear as you whispered,

“fuck me, please?”

——

sunghoon stepped out of the bathroom, still half–asleep as he adjusted his shirt. at the same time, you walked out of the kitchen looking as normal, cute, girlfriend–ly, and happy as ever—bright smile, fresh face, still wearing the same oversized shirt as last night. 

“oh! good morning, my baby!” you chirped, immediately walking over and kissing his cheek sweetly.

sunghoon smiled despite the lingering unease from last night. “hi, morning.” he hummed, kissing you back softly on the lips. 

he hesitated for a moment, then spoke carefully.

“... can we, uh, talk about last night?”

your expression shifted. you looked down for a second, then back up at him with wide, innocent eyes.

“ugh, i’m sorry,” you said softly. “i had a really bad dream… and i think i was sleepwalking or something. i don’t even remember most of it…”

sunghoon hummed, rubbing the back of his neck. “it was kinda scary. you were saying and doing stuff. and the way you looked at me—” “i know, i know,” you cut in gently, stepping closer and wrapping your arms around his waist. you hugged him tight, pressing your cheek against his chest. “i’m so sorry, baby. i won’t do it again—promise.”

he slowly hugged your back, arms clinging around you. his voice was relieved, but still worried. 

“it’s okay. just promise me it won’t happen again.”

“i promise,” you said sweetly, giving him a squeeze. “i love you so much.”

“i love you too.”

it’s all so weird, but also not. just last night, sunghoon swore he could piss himself on the bed—but came the morning, and he couldn’t help himself.

he reached for his nametag on the counter and pinned it on. “i’ll see you later.”

“mmhm,” you hummed happily. then you suddenly perked up. “oh! i made you a little something.”

you hurried back to the kitchen counter and came back holding a neatly packed lunchbox, handing it to him with both hands like it was a precious gift.

“since i’m not working anymore, i couldn’t stand not doing anything for you and feeling like a useless sex doll—”

sunghoon frowned almost instantly, cutting you off. “what? what are you talking about?”

for a split second, your expression glitched in real time—eyes flickering, smile twitching unnaturally like a bad video feed. your pupils constricted and dilated before it went back normal. you recovered almost instantly, laughing it off like it was nothing. 

“what? sorry, just forget it! here.”

you pushed the lunchbox into his hands with a wide smile. 

sunghoon took it, a little confused. “um… alright.”

you leaned in and kissed him again—soft, lingering, and full of that obsessive affection. he kissed you back, placing his hands on your hips momentarily. 

you pulled away with a bright smile, brushing off nothing from his shoulders like a doting girlfriend. then, you did that cute giddy thing—standing on your tiptoes, dropping back down, then rising onto your tiptoes again, hands clasped in front of you.

“enjoy your day, hoonie!” you said sweetly. “but not too much.” you smiled.

“i’ll be right here when you get home.” 

sunghoon gave you a small smile, and turned toward the door.

only to find it taped shut, literally. layers of grey duct tape crisscrossing over them frame and knob and wall, sealing it completely.

he stopped dead in his tracks, eyes widened in shock and disbelief. “uh… um…”

he didn’t say anything else. he just walked over and tried to pull the knob—the tape held firm.

behind, you stood perfectly still, watching with that same serene smile. you were still standing on your tiptoes, then dropping back down, then onto your tiptoes again. 

“you okay, baby?” you asked, voice soft and innocent. “you seemed to struggle a little… maybe you should just stay at home?”

sunghoon forced a chuckle, still tugging at the door. “no, no, i uh… i got this, baby. just…”

with a sharp rip, he finally tore enough of the tape off to open the door. he turned back to you, trying to act normal. 

“i’ll see you soon.”

you waved at him with an unnervingly sweet, cute smile. still standing in the same spot—still doing your tiptoes movement.

——

sunghoon and haewon were in the aisles arranging the new cd arrivals. 

“been a while since we hung out,” she said casually, sliding a few albums into place. 

“yeah,” sunghoon replied, not looking up from where he was crouching down. “got busy. and yn’s not exactly the hang–out type anymore.”

haewon paused, looking down at him with a raised eyebrow.

“what, really? she used to come over a lot and watch movies with jake and i.” she shrugged. “huh. guess relationships change people.”

sunghoon chuckled, then he smiled, finally looking up to her. “what’s up with that?”

the girl laughed lightly, shaking her head as she continued with her task. “nothing? i always thought yn was like this really cool, whimsical girl, you know what i mean? but now i barely even see you, let alone her. just… bummed.”

sunghoon’s hands slowed on the cds. “uh. i guess so.”

the silence between them grew a little awkward. sensing it, haewon quickly changed the subject with a brighter tone. “oh, yeah, also—jake wants to hold this big, cool movie night at our place tonight. you’re joining?”

sunghoon pursed his lips, then thought for a little while. true—it’s been a while since the three—or four, if including you—hung out together since sunghoon and you became a thing. it had also been a while since he properly talked to haewon and jake outside of work.

everything lately had revolved around you.

“...yeah, sure, actually,” he finally said. “who else is joining?”

haewon smiled, relieved that the awkwardness had passed. “mm, i think jake invited some band people too. aerona’s there too, if you remember.”

sunghoon nodded. “sure. yeah, that works.”

they were cut off by kim calling out from the front counter. “haewon! can you work on this aisle? and sunghoon, you can take your break now!”

haewon grunted softly, rolling her eyes. “i’ll see you tonight.”

“sure,” sunghoon replied with a small smile. 

with another grunt from him, he stood back up, rubbing his hands together and setting the box aside.

as he was walking toward the counter to head to the breakroom, sieun—your bestfriend—suddenly appeared in front of him. she was wearing a low cut sleeveless top and jeans shorts, boots that rose up till her knees.

“sunghoon, hi!”

he was slightly taken aback. “oh, sieun, hey. what are you doing here?”

he kept walking, slipping behind the counter and into the small breakroom to grab his lunchbag. the breakroom door was right behind the front counter, so sieun waited in front with her arms folded in front of her, pressed against her chest—making her cleavage appear more… prominent. 

when he came back out with the lunchbox you’d made him, sieun grinned.

“oh, you know… i kinda wanna rent something,” she said, voice playful. “secretary, maybe?”

sunghoon didn’t know sieun like that aside from sharing a band practice room together occasionally. so seeing her this way, kinda changed the way he viewed her. 

he hummed, letting out a small scoff. “we don’t sell porn here.”

sieun giggled, tilting her head. “oh! so you know?” she leaned forward a little more. “it’s not porn, though? it’s just… suggestive.”

the atmosphere between them felt changed—flirty on her end. 

“well, you gotta pirate it, ‘cause we don’t have it here.”

he then set the lunchbag you made him on the counter between them, creating a space. sieun’s eyes flicked to it. 

“awe, mommy made you lunch, sunghoon?”

“nope,” he replied, a small smile tugging at his lips. “yn did, actually.”

sieun let out a soft laugh, raising her eyebrows. “oh, how sweet. she’s the best at cooking,” she hummed, raising an eyebrow. “very… housewife material of her.”

sunghoon chuckled lightly and opened the lid.

the smell hit them both at the same time. 

inside was the most unappetising, inedible, atrocious looking lunch either of them had ever seen—it was just a sandwich. except, the sandwich was both burnt and wet at the same time—the bread charred back on the edges while the middle looked soggy and slimy. a small bug was even crawling slowly across the top.

both of them recoiled instantly.

siuen made a disgusted noise and turned her head away. sunghoon quickly slammed the lid shut, eyes wide with horror.

the lunchbox landed in the trash.

——

the drive started quiet. after shift, jake asked for a ride home in which sunghoon agreed—having lived in the same row of neighborhoods, after all. 

then, jake cleared his throat.

“i wanna talk about you and yn.”

sunghoon kept his eyes on the road. “what’s there to talk about?

“come on.”

the driver sighed, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. “you know i like her. for a long time too.”

“i know,” jake said carefully, knowing how fragile the topic was. “but i just think you guys should be apart for a bit—”

“i’ve never been so fucking happy,” sunghoon cuts in, voice sharp, laced with defensiveness. “not after my dad passed.”

jake tried again. “it’s just for a little—”

“and you’re trying to give me reasons not to be.”

a heavy beat of silence settled in the car.

“look, i just don't want you, or yn for that matter, to get hurt,” jake said, tone more serious now. “she’s my friend, and you’re my bestfriend, and i’m totally thrown and weirded out by this. can we please break this down?”

sunghoon’s grip on the wheel tightened. “i don’t want to break it down for you.”

jake pushed. “she lied about her grandma. she didn’t have a reason to—”

“i’m still not breaking down our relationship—”

“we don’t even hang out anymore—”

“right, like i had to hear about your cool–ass party from haewon—”

“and you don’t think this is fucking weird at all?”

“were you going to invite us?”

their voices overlapped, the argument building fast and messy in the confined space of the car.

jake frowned. “don’t change the subject. and i wasn’t sure if i wanted to, if i’m being completely honest.”

sunghoon’s jaw clenched. “why not?”

the car slowed to a stop in front of jake’s house.

he turned to sunghoon, expression serious. “because it looks like yn is going through something worse than molly, and it seems to me that you’re taking advantage of it—”

“oh, for fuck’s sakes!” sunghoon snapped, turning to jake. his arms rested on the shoulder of the car seat. “she’s all over me! are you fucking kidding?”

“exactly!” jake shot back. “you were all over her, now she’s all over you and it doesn’t look good. it doesn’t look good at all, man.”

sunghoon let out a bitter laugh, gripping the steering wheel tighter. “why are you trying to ruin this for me? she’s the one who won’t leave me alone.”

jake exhaled, rubbing his face. “alright. then be a man, and make that clear. you can come, but out of love, yn can’t. or yn can come, and you stay at home.”

just before jake stepped out of the car, he paused, one hand on the door.

“i don’t want my friend’s relationship to be built on some weird codependency or what-the-fuck-ever.”

he shut the door behind him.

——

tired from the long day and the argument with jake, sunghoon pushed the door open and flicked on the lights. he just wanted to shower and rest—and cuddle with you until sleep took over.

but the moment he stopped inside, the smell hit him first—sour, acrid, vomit, and urine.

you were still standing in the middle of the living room, the same spot he left you in, soaked in sweat and vomit, standing in a pool of your own piss. the same shirt from earlier was ruined, clinging wetly to your body. urine stained your legs and the floor beneath you.

you hadn’t moved from that spot.

“hoonie!” you said brightly.

sunghoon froze, eyes wide with horror.

“oh, shit—yn?! what the fuck? are you okay?”

you seemed to realise the state you were in. at his reaction, you stepped back embarrassed, looking down at yourself with a small, confused frown.

“i—i’m sorry… oh gosh, i should’ve showered…”

sunghoon moved toward you quickly, concerned and utterly confused. he grabbed a tissue from the tv stand and started wiping your face, trying not to gag at the smell.

“what happened?” he asked, voice laced with worry.

you looked up at him, eyes glassy. “my body feels weird and i couldn’t stop puking… ugh, i don’t know…”

sunghoon’s eyes widened. he scrunched his nose at the overwhelming stench. “did you have a seizure or something?" 

you shook your head slowly.

“i was waiting for you to come home.”

you looked down at yourself again and shivered with visible revulsion.

“oh gosh… i’m so disgusting… you’re probably so disgusted with me. i’m so sorry—let me shower, and i’ll clean this all up.”

you walked toward the bathroom. sunghoon followed close behind, but you slammed the door in his face before he could do anything. the shower water turned on a second later.

“yn, i don’t understand how—” he started, voice raised above the noise of the water.

“i’ll clean it, baby,” you called back, voice sweet despite everything.

sunghoon stood right outside the door, shoulders slumped, forehead resting against the door.

“yn?”

“yeah?”

“...you love me, right?”

“yeah, a lot!”

he closed his eyes.

“...okay. so never do that again, hm?”

“do what? wait for you to come home?”

sunghoon rested his head fully against the door, voice tired.

“not that, baby. you can wait for me—but you know, you can also do things around the house.”

“okay, baby.”

a beat of silence.

“so uhm… what did you do today?”

“nothing, baby.”

another long pause. defeated and unsure, sunghoon finally spoke up again, “i’m going to jake’s house tonight.”

the shower water stopped. and everything went eerily quiet. 

you sounded hurt when you replied. “okay.”

“so i, uh… i’m gonna go there, okay?”

“yup. i can get dressed after this.”

“that’s nice, baby, but uh… i think it’s just a band thing.”

“oh, i know ‘cause sieun was telling me she’s going.”

sunghoon frowned, taken aback. “sieun too? what, really?”

the bathroom door suddenly slammed open. 

you stood there, drenched, wrapping only in a towel. hair dripping water onto the floor. your eyes were wide and intense. 

“yeah. why? are you happy? excited? is that why you’re telling me not to go?” with every sentence, you walked towards him. your eyes were wide, and your skin was warm and flushed from the hot water. you tilted your head once harshly, it threatened to break.

sunghoon stepped back until his back met the wall, hands raised. “no, no, no, baby, no that’s not it—”

then, like a switch, you stood still, like normal, with an innocent look on your face. “but um, okay. if you want me to stay at home, i can stay at home, hoonie.”

now he was feeling overwhelmingly guilty. he didn’t know sieun, your bestfriend, was coming too—so now it just seemed like an overall big misunderstanding. 

“no, it’s okay. i’m sorry—you should come.”

“mm, it’s fine. you can go without me.”

he started persuading you to go, but you kept insisting in that soft tone of yours—”i don’t want to bother you, i’ll just wait here like always,” “i don’t want to make you uncomfortable…”

sunghoon didn’t know what to do.

——

jake deadpanned sunghoon the moment he walked in with you clinging to his arm. sunghoon avoided his gaze. around the low table were two other guys from the band circle and sieun, who gave sunghoon a flirty little wave. 

you and sunghoon sat together on the couch, your body pressed close to his. jake and haewon were sitting on single chairs across the table, and others just scattered around.

the group was playing “dare or drink”—a stack of cards with ridiculous and explicit dares.

one of the guys, jaemin, pulled a card and grinned.

“switch spots with whoever you want.”

“hell yeah,” he said immediately, eyes landing on you. “i wanna sit next to yn.”

your eyes widened slightly and you instantly looked over to sunghoon, pouting and pleading, “nooo…” and caught sunghoon’s hand as he got up, squeezing it lightly. “baby, i’ve showered…”

he gave your hand a gentle squeeze back. “it’s fine, babe.”

he stood up and moved to the only empty spot—right next to haewon.

jaemin happily took his place beside you. you looked visibly sad, like a kicked puppy with your eyebrows frowned inwards, scooting slightly from the other guy. 

he laughed. “damn, sunghoon, what kinda spell you got on her?”

the group chuckled. sunghoon forced a smile but didn’t say anything.

it was now your turn. you pulled a card but didn’t read it out loud. instead, you stared at it for a long second before standing up and suddenly speaking in a soft, rambling voice—like you were telling a story no one asked for.

“my wish is to die like an angel, sinless… i don’t know what it is, and i don’t think i’m the only one. falling from the sky with wings made of glass, shattering beautifully so everyone can see who i really am inside. but i can’t. i can’t die like an angel, and i think i can’t die at all. i can’t die like an angel like i wanted to. i’m not an angel—i’m not—i don’t know. i just want to be something.”

the room went deathly quiet. whatever it was… hung heavy in the air—deeply unsettling in everyone’s ribs. jake blinked, swallowing the lump in his throat. haewon, too, blinking confusedly, her lips parting like she wanted to say something—but not sure what.

sieun made a face—a clear what the fuck….? expression—while the other two guys exchanged awkward glances, one of them muttering a quiet, “what…?”

sunghoon just stared at you, completely confused, mouth slightly open like haewon—wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words.

sieun finally broke the silence, raising an eyebrow. “uh… you good, babe?”

you blinked, sat down again, then smiled like nothing strange had happened at all. 

“yeah. i’m perfect.”

haewon cleared her throat awkwardly. “um… okay, sunghoon—it’s your turn.”

sunghoon blinked, snapping out of it. “oh shit, okay.”

he reached forward and pulled a card. his face paled the moment he read it. he glanced at you—you were leaning forward with sweet anticipation, smiling brightly. then he looked at jake silently pleading. 

“...kiss the person to your left.”

it was haewon.

“ooohs,” and “wows,” rippled through the group. sunghoon made eye contact with you again. your expression had gone completely dead—emotionless, empty. then, the corners of your mouth stretched downwards tightly while your eyes remained unblinking and wide.

then you stood up slowly. everyone’s eyes followed you. 

you stood behind haewon’s folded chair for what felt like forever.

swiftly, you moved behind haewon’s chair and grabbed the back of it—dragged it backward with a loud, grating creak that echoed through the room. haewon’s eyes widened and she gripped the armrests for support and balance. 

then you crouched right next to sunghoon’s chair, puckered your lips, and waited.

the whole room was shocked into silence.

sunghoon stared at you for a second. he hadn’t even planned to do the dare—he was going to drink instead. but the way you were looking at him now…

he leaned in and kissed you. 

then, you looked at sunghoon with glassy eyes.

“no one on this earth will ever comprehend what it feels like to love someone as much as i love you,” you whispered against his lips.

you stood up abruptly and giggled, clapping your hands once like a child who’d just finished a performance. 

“that was fun!”

jake looked almost hurt for a second, but then forced a smile. “um, okay… dare still count. who wants shots?”

a beat.

jaemin raised his hand. “i’ll take one.”

“god bless, thank you jaemin,” jake said, trying to keep the mood light.

“who else?”

you locked eyes with sunghoon. he looked rather uncomfortable. guilt suddenly washed over your face. your heart beat once, then twice, then thrice before something in you snapped.

you jolted violently, swiping the entire stack of cards off the table with one arm. before anyone could react, you grabbed the vodka bottle and smashed it hard against the edge of the table.

CRASH.

glass exploded everywhere. everyone jerked back in fear, chairs scraping loudly as people scrambled away. haewon nearly stumbled over her chair. 

“it’s not me!” you screamed, voice cracking. “i’m not the devil!”

you kept smashing the broken bottle against the table, shards flying. sieun gasped aloud, but wasn’t able to do anything to stop you. sunghoon too, just watched in horror.

“help her! shit—sunghoon!”

“get her to the fucking hospital!”

then, in a frenzied motion, you lifted the sharp, broken vodka bottle and stabbed the jagged end into the side of your face. 

the blunt glass failed to puncture deeply, but it still caused crazy damage—tearing open your cheek in a ragged, bloody gash. blood poured down your face instantly, dripping onto your pretty little dress (too pretty for a simple movie night) and onto the floor. 

sobbing, you kept pressing it in, twisting it slightly. more blood spraying as the glass cut deeper into your skin.

“please—it’s not me!”

the room erupted into chaos—people standing up, chairs knocking over.

“yn, shit!”

sunghoon just stared at you from where he was sitting, almost… emotionless. almost. he blinked like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. his mind was racing—every moment, every strange behaviour, every time he’d ignored it all. he didn’t move.

he couldn’t.

you kept pressing the jagged glass into the side of your face for a few more terrifying seconds before you suddenly stopped. the broken bottle slipped from your bloody fingers and clattered to the floor.

your expression changed instantly. you blinked, looking around the room like you just woke up from a nightmare. 

“oh… oh my gosh, i’m so sorry…”

you looked horrifying. blood poured freely down the left side of your face from the ragged rash on your cheek, staining your pretty dress. your hands were cut and bleeding from gripping the broken glass—and your eyes were wide and teary.

you chuckled awkwardly, nipping at the bottom of your lip as you darted your tongue to lick the blood around your lips. 

everyone in the room was horrified. haewon had her hand over her mouth. sieun was colourless. the other guys were frozen. jake looked like he was about to be sick. 

you tried to smile, voice shaky as you stood up, wiping your bloody hands on your skirt. 

“okay, okay… i’m so sorry, guys. oh gosh, silly me,” you let out a weak laugh, tucking your hair behind your ear. “it was just a joke, um—i’m leaving. sorry, sorry…”

you started crying softly, tears mixing with the blood on your face.

then, you turned to sunghoon, voice small as you extended your arm out.

“come on, baby.”

everyone’s eyes snapped to him.

——

the hospital didn’t take you in.

the nurse had asked sunghoon to make a report and leave you there for treatment, but he refused. he didn’t want to leave you alone. not now, not like this, not ever.

so he drove home instead, your head nuzzling into his shoulder the entire ride, one of your hands tightly gripping his free arm like you were afraid he’d disappear.

back at his house, sunghoon sat at the dining table. the cut on your cheek had stopped bleeding but the parted flesh looked raw and ugly. it gave him chills how you were so unbothered by it.

he was about to stand up when you grabbed his hand.

“where are you going…?”

“just getting water, yn…”

you looked down on your lap, still holding his wrist. sunghoon stared at you for a long, heavy moment—contemplating, licking his dry lips wet.

“why did you do that?”

you finally looked up to him, eyes showing visible sadness, your eyebrows dropped. “...you and haewon were going to kiss…”

sunghoon sighed. he’d half–expected that’d be your answer. sighing, he ran his other hand along his face. “i wasn’t even going to do it,” he said, frustration creeping in. “i was going to drink—you… you scared everyone.”

swallowing the lump in your throat, your gave his wrist a gentle squeeze. “i don’t know why i did it…” you whispered. 

sunghoon shook his head, sitting back down. “look at your face,” he said, voice softer but still strained.

“i’m sorry—i got scared…”

he reached out and gently wiped the dried blood from your cheek with his thumb. you leaned into his touch like a starved animal. 

then, you added quietly, “sieun likes you too.”

sunghoon’s patience finally snapped. he frowned, and pulled his hand back, growing frustrated. why the fuck would it ever matter if sieun liked him? 

“that’s… god, that’s—”

you looked up at him, confused, pulling your hand back. “what…?”

it all blew up.

“god, everything was fucking normal!” he burst out, voice cracking as he stood up. sunghoon turned around to face the wall, clear frustration, anger, disappointment, confusion—all displayed on his face. 

“and now you’re so—you’re so—!”

sunghoon turned and stopped himself, seeing the way you flinched, eyes wide and shocked and teary. 

“i’m sorry… i’m sorry,” he said quickly, voice breaking as he reached for you again. his hands were shaking as he held your cheeks, thumbs gently brushing away the tears. 

“you’re normal,” he whispered, voice cracking. “you’re so normal, and you’re so beautiful and i love you so much but—oh god, yn, please don’t ever do that again.”

sunghoon’s eyes were glassy, filled with fear and guilt and love all at once.

“it’s not okay,” he murmured, shaking his head. “this isn’t okay.”

you looked up at him. he searched for your face desperately, still cupping your cheeks.

“do you… do you like me?”

“of course, hoonie. i love you—”

“no, no, no, no, no,” he cut you off, shaking your head frantically. his grip on you tightened a fraction. “do you like me? do you even like me?”

you tried to answer again. “i lov—”

sunghoon frowned—he almost pressed his thumbs into your flesh. “did yn like me?” he pressed, looking right into your eyes for answers. “is yn happy? did she like me?”

slowly, you cracked a smile, all teeth and almost like a grin. 

“yeah.”

sunghoon let out a shaky breath, eyes filled with pain and confusion. “yeah… no, no, no, no…” he whispered, suddenly pulling away, standing up and walking away.

you stood up too, voice small and scared. “where are you going?”

“bathroom, yn,” he said almost quickly, not turning around. “can i even do that?”

you frowned, now looking frustrated. the obsessive mask cracking as it bled through like the blood from your cut fleshes. “well, can you tell me you love me?” you said, tone laced with something of annoyance and eagerness. 

sunghoon stopped and turned around. his eyes were red, exhausted, and full of everything he’d been holding in.

“yn… this is all i’ve ever wanted.”

you tilted your head before stepping closer. “of course. i know that. this is all i’ve ever wanted too.” 

sunghoon shook his head slowly, stepping back. “no… it’s not…”

you stepped forward, eyes wide and pleading. “yes it is. this is all i’ve ever wanted.”

“i want this to work so bad,” he murmured, pain clear in his voice as he rubbed his face. 

“it can,” you said quickly, almost desperately as you stood before him. “of course it can.”

“no, it can’t.”

“yes it can.”

he ran a hand through his slightly sweaty hair, exhausted but not quite slowing down. sunghoon was borderline tearing up too out of frustration that you were just not getting it. “okay—so i’m gonna send you home and we’re gonna take some space—”

you immediately broke. your shoulders slumped like your soul just left you, like all the energy within had drained out. “noooo…” you started crying, then sobbing, then full–on wailing in a matter of seconds. 

“i don’t want space! i don’t wanna be apart from you! tell me what i should do!”

sunghoon frowned, voice cracked with frustration as he stepped away. “just be normal! be normal, yn!”

you screamed through your tears, “i can be normal!”

“god, i just want you to be yn!”

“i can be yn!” you screamed back, voice breaking and sobbing as your shoulder trembled. you followed wherever he went. “i can be anything you want!”

“don’t say that.” sunghoon said quietly, obviously drained. he held your shoulders, pressing his thumbs into your flesh to keep you steady. “yn will never say that.”

“it’s true!” you insisted, tears screaming. you held onto the hem of his shirt like an upset child. “i’ll be anything!”

sunghoon looked completely exhausted, no emotion left on his face. he was quiet now, staring at the floor. 

your lips parted when he didn’t look at you in the eyes. 

“oh… i’m so sorry. i’m so sorry, baby.”

you dropped to your knees in front of him with a thud, wrapping your arms tightly around his leg, clinging desperately as you buried your face against his thigh. your tears wet the fabric. 

“i can be yn… i can be yn… i’ll be whatever you want.” you murmured, kissing his thigh through his jeans.

“i’ll be sweet, and soft, and kind, caring… like yn… i’ll take care of you and we can cook and read together. i can be yn…” you continued, pressing your cheek into his flesh.

sunghoon slowly crouched to your level, cupping your cheeks so you were looking at him. 

“i love you too…” he whispered, voice breaking.

sunghoon really did.

then something in you snapped.

your face went completely emotionless. your eyes were empty, and you weren’t smiling—and it was as if your tears just stopped trailing down your flushed cheeks. you stood up in one unnaturally smooth, but quick motion—moving backward toward the table with stiff, mechanical steps. 

it didn’t look human.

sunghoon’s eyes widened in terror as he stumbled backwards against the desk, knocking things over. 

“stop! stop—fuck, yn, stop!”

you stood still in the darkness of the room, body rigid. for a terrifying second, he couldn’t predict what was coming next—only hearing his own heavy, ragged breathing and loud thumping of his own heart beat in his chest.

sunghoon didn’t know what was coming—cause you lunged forward, running straight at him—

but you stopped yourself.

“i’m sorry,” you murmured. 

a beat passed.

sunghoon was terrified, chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath.

“okay… god, okay. yn, i… i’m gonna step out. why don’t you… why don’t you take the bed, and i’ll just… i’ll just sleep somewhere else and i’ll come back in the morning before you’re even up.”

you stared at him for a long moment—sunghoon couldn’t see, but he could tell you were because of how heavy everything felt.

“okay.”

then you turned around and walked into the kitchen. a loud crashing sound echoed through the house—glass shattering, cabinets slamming, steel pans and pots clattering through the tiles. 

sunghoon flinched, frozen in fear. 

“yn?! what the fuck is happening? what are you doing?!”

the loud chaos went on for the next few seconds before it completely stopped. eerie silence. you came back out of the kitchen, still shrouded in shadow. your voice was calm, almost sweet, but the words were nothing but. 

and you were holding a knife.

“well… if i have the bed all to myself tonight…” you tilted your head, voice distant and almost flat, like you were not in the same space as he was. “...you’re not going to touch me. so i’ll do it myself. over and over and over. i’ll keep going until there’s nothing left inside. until every piece of me is used and hollowed out. my hands will move long after they go numb—and my body will keep moving even when it stops feeling like mine. it won’t stop until it hurts, and i won’t stop until i’m empty. i’ll just keep pushing until the last little bit of me breaks,” 

“...and then there’ll be nothing.”

the sharp blade of the knife in your hand glinted.

then you switched again.

“or you can stay!”

sunghoon’s eyes remained wide in terror as he gripped the carpet beneath him. trembling and shaking in fear, he let out a soft—

“...yeah.”

——

“do you love me?” 

that was the 27th time you asked that night.

you were on top of him, riding him slow and deep, hips rolling in a rhythm. your arms were wrapped tightly around his neck, pulling him as close as physically possible. you wanted to intertwine the cages of your ribs with his’—if that was possible. 

you couldn’t stop kissing him. kisses that tasted like salt from your tears and blood from your cut cheeks that didn’t want to leave your skin.

“do you love me?” you whispered against his lips for the 28th time that night.

sunghoon groaned softly, hands gripping your waist as you sank down onto him again, taking him to the hilt. despite everything—the fear, the confusion, the guilt, the violence—it felt so fucking good. too fucking good.

you’re perfect around him, warm and tight and desperately his.

“yeah…” sunghoon breathed, voice hoarse. “i love you.”

you smiled against his mouth, kissing him deeper, tongue sliding against his as you rode him harder. your hips moved with needy, possessive rolls, like you were trying to fuse your bodies together. 

“i love you so much, hoonie,” you murmured between kisses, whispering the confession straight into his insides. “i love you so much like no one else can…”

sunghoon’s eyes stung, wet. a tear slipped down his cheek as the overwhelming mix of pleasure hit him. he loved you. he loved you so much. even like this, he still loved you.

you noticed the tears and slowed your movements, cupping his face with both smaller hands. 

“why are you crying, baby?” you whispered sweetly, kissing the tear away. “i love you so much. i love you so much…”

you rode him again, slower this time, grinding down deep as you kissed him like the world was ending tomorrow. your bodies moved together in the dark of his room. 

sunghoon held you tighter, burying his face in your neck as tears fell down your shoulder, along your collarbone, tits, and down.

he didn’t know what this was anymore.

and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know.

——

some hours later, after the sex and the clinging, sunghoon was awoken by the soft buzz of his phone.

slowly, quietly reaching for it and careful not to wake you up. the screen lit up.

sieun: can you meet me at the park? sieun: i need to tell you something about yn.

at first, he quickly typed back with one hand.

sunghoon: i can’t. sieun: please. it’s important.

sunghoon: text.

the bubble appeared, then disappeared.

siuen: if youre not cmg, then im cmg over sieun: its about yn

he stared at the scene for a long second. 

sunghoon: fuck. fine

he glanced at you—sleeping on his arm, naked beneath the blanket, looking as soft and calm as ever. slowly, very slowly, he moved your arm off his chest and slipped out of the bed. he put on his pants and shirt as quietly as possible.

sunghoon was just about to leave the bedroom when—

“sunghoon.”

he froze.

“i’m just getting water…” he whispered back, heart pounding. he didn’t want to deal with another breakdown. 

there was a long pause. then your voice came again—different, smaller, quieter. 

“sunghoon… kill me. please.”

he stopped dead in his tracks, ashamed and in disbelief as he stared at your unconscious, sleeping body.

“what?” “shh… she’s sleeping. it’s me.”

despite the tremble in your voice, you were sleeping soundly. 

“you are you, yn.”

“shh… please don’t wake her up.” your voice cracked, desperate. “just kill me.”

a beat of heavy silence.

sunghoon’s throat tightened as he glanced at the floor, before returning to your sleeping form. your hair covered your face, but even so, he knew your eyes were closed, and your mouth was shut.

“what would be so bad… about being with me?”

he could hear the tears in your voice. 

“i’ve never been with you, sunghoon.”

a single tear slipped down your cheek.

“just kill me. please.”

sunghoon stood there, frozen. his heart shattered like it had never been before. without sparing you another glance, he turned and left the room. 

behind him, your voice followed, weak and broken, repeating and chanting like a prayer—

“please… please… please… please… please…”

——

sunghoon got into her car, closing the door behind him. 

“alright. so what about yn?”

sieun raised an eyebrow, unbuckling her seatbelt. “jeez, calm down… what’s up with her first? is she fine?”

sunghoon darted his eyes away, sighing. “nothing. she’s uh… she’s fine. she just wasn’t feeling well at the party.”

the girl gave him a look. a long one. full of suspicion and doubt. “she was about to kill herself.”

“i know,” sunghoon said quickly, trying not to recall the moment you stabbed yourself in the face with a vodka bottle. “but she’s fine now. she’s just going through something.”

the car fell quiet for a moment. sieun tapped her fingers on the steering wheel before she shifted in her seat.

“um, okay… well, first of all, i’m saying this as yn’s friend. and also your acquaintance, somehow.” she paused, raising an eyebrow, then continued. “i’d hate to see your hurt, and—oh, yn too, i guess. and i wouldn’t have done this if you guys weren’t together.” 

sunghoon frowned. “yeah…?”

sieun took a deep breath, dropping her hands from the steering wheel and onto her lap where she played with the hem of her short skirt. “i promise yn i wouldn’t tell you this.”

“what are you on about?”

“well… yn and jake have been hooking up on and off like, three years ago—and they’ve stopped, but i’m not sure when. probably a year ago, or something. it’s chill. i don’t think it’s romantic. and i know jake’s your bestfriend and all, and i’m sure he stopped going after her because he knows you like her. i’m just saying this just so you know.”

sunghoon stared at her, stunned. his heart was beating as fast as it could. he never knew this. he never fucking knew you had a history—a fling—with his own bestfriend before. 

the thought of jake fucking you the way sunghoon did was making his blood boil. the thought of you moaning jake’s name the way you did in his dream was making his skin crawl. the thought of the two of you sharing a kiss—the same lips sunghoon kissed every night—was making him… repulsed.

“what the fuck…?”

“yeah,” sieun said softly. “i just… i don’t know if she’s told you that, so i felt like i had to.” she said, still playing with the fabric. “you couldn’t imagine what it’s like being me, and having to be in a room with jake, you, and yn all together.” 

the mood in the car shifted. sieun leaned a little closer, her voice dropping into something more… slicky. 

“i just think you deserve someone more… outgoing. or something. like, chill…”

sunghoon looked at her and swallowed the lump in his throat. distracted, his hands landed on the way her fingers were moving around the skirt. 

he parted his mouth to say something when—

CRASH.

the driver–side window shattered violently. 

glass exploded inward as you ran head–first into it like a battering ram. before sieun could even scream, you wedged a brick against the steering wheel, grabbed a fistful of her hair—so tight it threatened to rip off her scalp—, and slammed her face down hard against the brick.

HONK!

the horn blared with every slam..

you didn’t stop.

you yanked sieun’s head back by the hair and smashed her face into the brick again.

HONK!

blood sprayed across the dashboard and onto sunghoon’s face. sieun’s nose crunched on impact, splitting open. her cheek tore wide open, teeth falling down on her lap. 

HONK!

more blood poured from her broken nose and split lip. her cheekbone cracked with a wet sound. one of her teeth flew out, clattering against the windshield.

HONK!

you were relentless, animalistic. your face was covered by your hair, unfiltered rage as you kept yanking her head back by the hair and driving it down over and over and over again. 

HONK! HONK! HONK!

it was a bloodbath inside. on the seats, the roof, the windows, sunghoon. her face was unrecognisable, swollen, and mangled, one eye swelling shut, the other was exposing her eyeball. she was gurgling, choking on her own blood,

dead.

nothing to the name anymore.

playgirl’s just lost the lead singer.

sunghoon sat frozen in the passenger seat, paralysed by shock and terror. his body wouldn’t move, not a centimeter. his mouth hung open in silence as he watched you—the girl he loved—violently smashing her bestfriend’s face with raw force. 

he could only stare.

HONK!

with one last slam, you let go of sieun’s chunk of hair that you’d pulled out. her body slumped lifelessly against the seat, head tilting back. warm blood poured from her face, dripping down.

sunghoon stared. smoke from the broken horn lingered in the air like a ghost. he was paralysed—eyes widened, body frozen in horror.

you finally sighed, lifting your head up to face him with a bright, almost cheerful smile, blood smeared across your cheek and hands.

“oh—oh gosh! i’m sorry you had to see that, baby!”

you moved your hair out of your face, still smiling.

“my heart took a path i never chose… but just know you wanted this. this is all your fault. this is what you’ve wished for.”

sunghoon’s face was pale, mouth slightly open but nothing came out. upon his terrified reaction, your heart broke and the smile was instantly wiped off your face, replaced with a concerned look. 

“oh, no no no no no—” you rushed to his side, opening the passenger door. you cupped his face with your bloody hands, wiping the sweat and specks of blood from his skin. “breathe, baby, breathe,” you said, taking deep breaths.

“it’s okay. i’ve got you. that’s all that matters… you’re fine, baby. i’m soooo sorry for the drama, but this is your fault. sieun’s your fault.”

you pulled him into a tight hug, pressing your blood stained cheeks against his chest. 

“and you’re gonna have to help me get rid of her body, okay?”

sunghoon shook his head frantically. “no… no no no—”

“yes, baby. you’re gonna help me.”

“no, no, no—” he groaned, voice breaking.

you pulled back, still holding his face gently, eyes soft but insistent.

“baby, i forgive you and i won’t hold it against you. but we have to get rid of her, okay? now shake your head yes.”

he shook his head again, tears welling up.

you smiled patiently. “yes. yes. yes, baby.”

he kept shaking his head.

“nod your head yes.”

realizing he had no choice, sunghoon finally nodded, tears slipping down his cheeks.

——

sunghoon helped you move sieun’s body into the trunk of your car. you kissed him softly on the lips before saying you’d take it from here.

he drove back to his house but couldn’t bring himself to go inside. the fear was too heavy even though he knew you weren’t inside. the thought of being in his house by himself, waiting for you to come back was too much.

so instead, he drove until he reached crystal cove. 

it was barely 8 in the morning when he barged in, the bell above the door ringing violently. he went straight to the shelf where he’d found the one wish willow—

it wasn’t there.

“what the fuck…”

out of breath, sunghoon rummaged through the other display boxes, panicking—if it was all just his imagination. when he couldn’t find it, he stormed to the cashier, voice shaking.

“where is it? where’s the one wish willow?”

“what?”

sunghoon’s eyes twitched. “the one wish willow! it’s—it’s a white box with a twig that you can only wish for one thing!”

the cashier, with a cup of coffee in hand, raised an eyebrow, clicking his tongue.

“hey, look—you gotta chill… it like 7AM. what’s with the vibes you’re giving off?”

sunghoon was frantic, he looked around the shop for it. “come on, one wish willow! please, please—”

he stared at the bloodied guy like he was crazy. “...what? are you okay?”

sunghoon’s heart dropped. “what…?”

was it because of the blood on his shirt that nobody was taking him seriously? or was it because there was no such thing as one wish willow in the first place?

he was in disbelief. “no, no, no—don’t fuck with me. you guys had those!”

the cashier looked at him weirdly for a second—before chuckling like it’s the funniest fucking thing ever.

“chill out, jeez… i’m just messing with you. we moved them here.” he pointed right at the counter, where a small display now sat. 

sunghoon frowned, wanting to flip the cashier off but decided there was more important matter now. he grabbed the remaining one wish willow box from the display. 

“how can you fucking sell this to people?!”

the cashier shrugged, sighing. “look. we just sell what the boss wants us to sell. now if you can’t chill out and wipe that theatre blood off your face, i’m not gonna scan those for you.”

sunghoon snapped out of his rage for a second, realising how crazy and unhinged he sounded. he let out a deep breath and rubbed his face with one hand, on the verge of another round of tears and break down.

“sorry… fuck, i’m so sorry. oh god…”

the cashier’s expression softened a little when sunghoon calmed down, then he glanced at the boxes, and realisation kicked in.

“... what did you do?”

sunghoon couldn’t speak. the words wouldn’t come. 

the cashier sighed. “oh well. that’s just how it is.”

sunghoon’s voice cracked as he put the boxes on the counter. “help me reverse it.”

he shook his head. “nope. already used mine.”

“please, please, please—” 

sunghoon was begging at this point.

“nooo, you know that’s not how it works. it’s one wish for a reason! the box is full of warnings—did you read the instruction paper?”

“instru—dude, please, please—”

“nope. you know what you were wishing for.”

“i didn’t—”

“no.” the cashier said firmly, now looking at sunghoon straight into his eyes. “you do. there’s no way to undo, or break the wish unless you kill youself—”

sunghoon’s eyes widened, he froze.

“—unless you kill youself, or have someone else reverse it.”

“k—kill… myself?”

the cashier nodded, drumming his fingers against the countertop. “yeah. that’s usually the easy way people do it. i’ve dealt with unsatisfied customers like you all the time for the same reason. it’s too much of a hassle to explain it to others, so they just kill themselves.”

sunghoon remained frozen, swallowing the lump in his throat. his hands shook around the box. the weight of his mistake finally came crushing down on him when he realised just how heavy the consequences were. 

noticing sunghoon’s reaction, the cashier sighed, rubbing his head. 

“just have someone undo it for you. that’s probably the best option you got here—since,” he lifted an eyebrow, seeing sunghoon in a state of shock.

 “...you don’t wanna kill yourself.”

the cashier scanned all the one wish willows for sunghoon.

——

sunghoon knocked on jake’s door—loud, frantic, over and over until jake finally opened it, looking confused.

“hey, what’s up? you almost knocked my door over.”

sunghoon ignored it and pushed past him into the house. jake closed the door behind. the friend wanted to ask about the stain and blood on sunghoon’s shirt, but didn’t get the chance to when sunghoon began.

“is haewon here?”

jake frowned at his friend’s urgency before shaking his head. “no… she left cause she wanted to check up on yn…”

“what—?! fuck, uhm, okay, listen to me first. listen to me well. you know—you know how yn started acting all weird and liking me all of a sudden?”

jake nodded slowly, still confused. “...yeah?”

sunghoon pulled out one of the one wish willow boxes from his pocket and held it in front of jake with shaky fingers.

“it’s ‘cause… it’s ‘cause i made a wish. i made a wish—and i broke this twig and at first i was confused as hell but it’s real!”

jake frowned, staring back and forth between sunghoon and the box. “what…?”

“no, it’s real!” sunghoon insisted, voice shaking. “you can make a wish, but just one! just one… and it’ll work. i wished yn loved me, and i didn’t think it was gonna work but it worked and it’s why she’s acting insane all of a sudden!”

sunghoon’s voice cracked. “you don’t even recognise her anymore.”

a beat.

jake took it all in, quiet for a long moment. then he looked at sunghoon with wide, stunned eyes. 

“...you made a wish… on yn?”

sunghoon looked down on the box in his hands. “...yeah.”

jake was shocked, almost disgusted. it felt as if he didn’t know who was standing before him. “why the fuck would you do that… why the fuck would you wish something like that on her?”

“because i fucking like her, jake!” sunghoon exploded. “i fucking like her and you know it and you would’ve done the same too if you had this! and—and i know you guys have been fucking!” 

jake’s face hardened. “what the fuck? that’s none of your business! and for the record, you know i liked yn first. you fucking know it but you decided to like her too and i’m too kind of a friend to give that to you!”

he snapped, heart pounding. jake’s never fought with sunghoon this bad, ever.

quietly, like a murmur, he continued, “and no, i’m not that big of an asshole to wish something like this.”

sunghoon scoffed, bitter. “sure. right. ‘cause you’re yn’s most perfect guy that she loves. because you’ve been with her since childhood—so naturally, you guys are meant to be together? is that it?.” 

the tension in the room was suffocating. 

not being able to stand jake anymore, sunghoon swallowed the lump in his throat before storming away from the house, slamming the door behind him loudly.

——

“...yn…?”

the house was dark except for the slivers of sunlight cutting through the curtains and the candles flickering across the house. the air smelled like wax, and heavy with metal.

you were nowhere to be found.

but on the coffee table was a memorial, or at least what looked like it—photos of sieun, locks of her hair, her eyeball that threatened to roll out of the skull, her id, and her belongings from the car. 

there was also stuff of haewon’s, arranged carefully with flowers and little trinkets. it looked like a shrine too. 

next to the table, on the tv—played clips of sunghoon sleeping, with you recording and appearing every now and then.

sunghoon’s stomach dropped. “yn…?”

“i’m right here, baby.”

you stepped out from behind him.

you were wearing sieun’s clothes—a short denim skirt, boots, and a tight tank top. your hair was cut shorter, choppy, and you’d stabbed a nose piercing through your nostril. blood still trickled down from the fresh wound.

you smiled at him sweetly. 

“do you like me better now?” 

sunghoon was stunned, shocked into silence. his mouth opened, but no words came out. he couldn’t get his eyes off you.

“...yn… yn, i need you to do something for me… okay?”

you tilted your head, eyes wide and glassy. even after all these, you still weren’t enough for him. 

“why can’t you just love me? why don’t you love me?”

you started hitting yourself—hard, open–palmed slaps against your own face until sieun’s rings and bracelets split your cheek open, fresh blood running down. 

“i just want you to love me!”

“stop! stop!”  

you stopped, standing still. sunghoon stumbled backwards, backing away slowly, terrified. you stepped closer, voice dropping obsessively, hungrily, and almost sweetly inhumane.

“gosh, i want to eat you up… i want to be with you,” you licked your lips, tilting your head as you followed him. “i want you to love me… i love you more than anyone else in this world…”

sunghoon’s breath hitched.

outside, a loud knocking started on the door. 

jake’s voice came through, urgent. 

“dude, i’m sorry! i’m so sorry—tell me again what’s happening and let’s fix it! can we still save her?!”

sunghoon’s eyes widened. he fell back onto the couch, mouth open like he wanted to scream at jake not to come in—but he couldn’t bring himself to. the words died in his throat as he’s forced to look at you.

you straddled his lap, eyes wild and unhinged. the screaming outside grew louder as jake kept banging on the door. 

“hoon—i’m coming in! shit, i’m coming in!”

you pressed the tip of the knife you’d been holding right in front of your left eyes, smiling with pure psychotic glee as blood trailed out of your mouth. 

“i’ll kill myself, hoonie! i’ll fucking kill myself right in front of you!”

the horror in sunghoon’s face was pure. his body was shaking as he stared at the blade hovering too dangerously close to your eye.

right at that moment, you turned with crazy speed and hurled the knife toward the door.

THUD.

the blade sank deep right into jake’s chest the second he forced the door open. he stumbled back, eyes wide with shock as blood instantly soaked his shirt. he collapsed, back hitting the door shut.

dead, before he even hit the ground.

almost instantly, you turned back to sunghoon, fisted the collar of his shirt before screaming—

“i’ll rip my fucking eyes out of my skull and shove them up my fucking cunt, hoonie!”

you vomited stomach acid right at his face. sunghoon flinched, shutting his eyes as the warm, burning  liquid slid down his skin. 

he was trembling, broken, unsure what to do or what was real anymore, but the words still came out soft and full of the love that had ruined everything. 

“i love you. i love you, yn. i love you.”

you screamed at him, eyes wild. “scream it!”

“i love you! i love you, yn!”

like a flick of a wrist, you fell on top of him, sighing contentedly as you rubbed your cheek against his chest. your voice dropped into that sickly sweet tone again.

“i know… i know. i love you too, baby. you owe me that. you owe me that.” 

sunghoon’s voice was hoarse and dry as he lifted his arms to wrap them around your frail body. “we can… we can work this out.”

his hand came upon your head, brushing your hair. 

“mmhm. mmhm. i’m sorry for the drama… ugh, i don’t know why i do that. i know you love me. i’m gonna stop on the mollies…”

he nodded slowly, still in shock. if you could feel, or hear his heartbeat—you didn’t comment.

you nuzzled closer, kissing his jaw. “i’m such a mess… i’ll be pretty again, i promise."

“no, no,” he whispered, holding you tight as he planted a kiss on top of your head. “you’re gorgeous, baby. i love you so much. i love you.”

“i’m sorry—”

“you’re beautiful. my beautiful girl.”

you smiled against his neck, all soft and loving. 

“i love you so much. more than anyone else in this world.”

he knew that.

sunghoon closed his eyes and looked up, tears slipping down his cheeks. he’s fucked up. he’s fucked up like no one else ever did before. he’d ruined you—an angel, the sweetest girl anyone’s ever met. he’d turned you into a version of yourself not even your parents could recognise—admit it was theirs. 

a version not even you, would know. 

“let’s take a shower. let’s take a shower, okay? freshen ourselves up.”

you hummed happily. “mmhm.”

——

“open up! open this fucking door, hoonie!” 

you were yelling and slamming on the door like manic, voice shifting from wild rage and sickly sweet.

“baby, please… i’m sorry, i’m so sorry—did i scare you? just open the door. i love you. i love you so much. don’t leave me! don’t you dare leave me—!”

“let me in, bitch! fuck you, fuck you!”

“oh shit—just a second, baby! just a second!” he screamed back.

“okay, just a second. thank you!”

sunghoon stood in front of the sink, staring back at himself in the mirror. his face was bloodied—did some belong to him? some yours, some sieun’s. he’d like to think jake’s and haewon’s were there too.

his eyes were empty. he couldn’t cry if he wanted to. there was just nothing left.

he touched the onyx necklace you had given him, the stone cold—meant for protection and grounding, felt meaningless in his hand. 

“baby?”

a beat.

“i thought about what you said, and maybe you were right… we need some time apart for us…”

sunghoon opened the cabinet with shaking hands and pulled out a razor. he held it to his wrist, then his throat, then his neck—aiming for the spot that would it fast. 

his hand trembled as he pushed the blade deeper into his skin, not yet puncturing, but making a dent.

he couldn’t do it.

“if space is what you need—then sure, okay, we can take some space.”

sunghoon pulled away with a deep breath, shaking his head and tossing the razor aside. he rubbed his face and pressed the heels of his palms deep into his eyes—praying this was all some sick nightmare that was about to end.

and then he’d wake up, and everything will be fine. you’ll invite him over for a movie night where he would come in bringing popcorn and drinks. and he’ll confess—tell you everything he’s been keeping to himself.

just like the way he rehearsed it. 

“i’m really sorry for scaring you, hoonie. i just—i just love you but i want to respect your decision.”

instead, sunghoon opened the cabinet again and found the old bottle of insect poison pellets—the same ones that had killed kibbles.

he sat on the toilet, staring at the bottle for a long moment. he knew there was no turning back. he poured one pellet into his palm, then put it in his mouth and swallowed it.

not convinced enough, he dumped the rest of the bottle straight into his mouth and forced them all down, choking them dry.

“hoonie…? baby, please open the door…”

sunghoon got off the toilet and rested his forehead against the door, when he knew you were standing and waiting for him on the other side of the door. 

he spoke softly, exhausted.

“um, yn… i… i’m really sorry.”

he swallowed hard, eyes closed.

“i’ve liked you for so long. so fucking long. i just… i couldn’t find the courage to confess. i thought you didn’t like me back and i was scared of losing you,” sunghoon said, the tip of his nose brushing against the hard wood.

“and now… now this is happening and there’s nothing i can do to fix it. i just like you so much. i love you so much.”

a beat of silence.

it felt like hours passed in a matter of seconds.

then a whisper, barely audible through the door—

“she likes you too.”

sunghoon’s eyes snapped open.

“what?”

before something shifted.

a spark ignited within him. the world snapped back into focus as the heavy fog that clouded everything lifted. 

his eyes widened. he stared at the bathroom door like it was the first time he was seeing it. slowly, sunghoon opened the door and walked out.

you were standing across from him, smiling shyly at him, a little nervous, a little hopeful. your hands are clasped in front of you. all sweet and innocent girlfriend.

he smiled back.

the two of you laughed together.

it was romantic when he approached you. sunghoon leaned in and kissed you passionately, hands cupping your face. his lips moved against yours with all the love and longing he had. on your tiptoes, you cupped his cheeks as well and with a soft flick of his tongue, you parted your lips partly and he wasted no time slipping his tongue in, overlapping and dancing your own. 

“i love you,”

when sunghoon pulled back slightly, his face was covered in blood from your wound, but neither of you cared. 

then suddenly, his knees buckled.

sunghoon collapsed—but you caught him, lowering him onto the sofa on your lap. pure panic flooding your face as you cradled his cheeks, hands trembling.

“baby… babe… oh gosh, don’t leave me alone—what did you do? oh gosh, baby no!” 

your voice cracked, high and desperate, as you searched his face for anything. his eyelids fluttered, skin already turning clammy. you could feel his warmness fading beneath your palms.

“no, no, no—stay with me. stay with me, baby,” you whispered, pressing frantic kisses to his forehead, his temples, his lips. tears streamed down your cheeks, mixing with the blood still drying on your hands. “you can’t leave me. i love you more than anything. i did everything for you… everything. don’t you dare go. i won’t let you.”

you wailed, hugging his head tightly to your chest, rocking him back and forth. you stroked his hair while the other clutched his shirt, fingers digging into the fabric as if that could hold his soul down.

sobs wrecked your entire body as you buried your face in his hair, breathing in his scent. his breathing was growing weaker and shallower—white foam of saliva began forming to the corner of his mouth as his body went limp. 

"i love you... i love you so much, hoonie, please—"

his body gave one final, weak shudder in your arms.

then everything went still.

for a heartbeat, the room was silent except for your ragged breathing.

the moment his heart stopped beating, you snapped back. 

your eyes widened in horror—followed by a blood-curdling scream ripped from your throat as you shoved yourself backward, letting sunghoon's limp body fall onto the bloodied floor with a dull thud. 

you stared at your bloodstained hands first—they were coated in sticky crimson that you could probably never remove no matter how many times you washed your hands. then your gaze darted around the room, confused, panicked, scared.

jake's body slumped by the door, eyes still open.

the memorial of haewon's and sieun's on the table.

and... sunghoon's motionless on the floor when you'd pushed him off you.

the wish shattered, and reality crashed over you like ice water.

"no... no, no, no—"

you scrambled onto the sofa, pulling your legs up and hugging your knees tightly to your chest. your sobs came harder and harder, violent, whole body shaking as you rocked back and forth. 

tears poured down your face as you buried it between your knees, screaming and sobbing louder. the weight of every horrible thing you had done—despite being only a witness hit you at once.

you were finally yourself again.

and you had never felt more alone.

ㅤ© ⌞hoonkitti⌝ ⁞ all rights reservedㅤ please don't share, copy, or translate my work.

Downtown is abuzz, springtime bringing out lifeforms in their fullest, humans on a leisurely stroll and vampires in their element, nightfall cast to upheave the sluggishness of day, canines bared and timeless beauty arresting. On the way to your destination, a concrete jungle of scaffolding and pets on leashes, you stop at an intersection. Cars zoom, traffic lights ticking down until they turn green again. The road, a blur of cars would usually have your attention, if not for the huge billboard plastered above the pizzeria and jazz bar just ahead. 

Pearl Bite: A bloodless white, a perfect smile. 

Your own faux canines show, tongue run beneath their point as your eyes dazzle at the advert. Specifically, the creator and model for Pearl Bite ─ your one and only boyfriend. 

College sweethearts, Sunghoon describes your romance as a sneaky attack on your behalf, nothing but his passion on his mind, only to be derailed. The brilliance of your smile, the heartiness of your laugh, your endless glow he couldn't shy away from. The next century is meant to build upon his newly-found interest in dentistry, open his own practice with amassed generational wealth and give back to his community. His initial plan only accounts for vampires, at the mercy of many cycled conversations of blood-stained fangs and how there's no vampire-equivalent for teeth-whitening. Then he meets you, unknowingly opens himself up more to the human experience, recognizes how they can differ vastly from his own, yet share so many similarities. 

You're the most selfless person he knows, a long-line of people served before you're last in line. Amongst the juggle of others' needs and aspirations, yours kind of included somewhere, he learns you're a product of everything you've ever loved and suffered from too. In the months passing too quick for his liking - still toeing the line of friendship(ish) - you bare yourself to him in the late night diner you work at. 

The one he walks you home from, drinks the shitty coffee because you've brewed it. The things vampires do for love.

In a dim corner booth, your chin perches on your folded arms, fingers drumming against a table you're yet to clean and are honestly too tired to at this point. It's been non-stop shifts packed into a never-ending semester, and whilst your job's meant to supplement your means of living, it also serves another purpose. 

"I owe my mom everything," you start, the bat of your lashes turning Sunghoon into a statue, knowing what's to come yet unsure. Uncertain how to proceed. "No matter how little we had to our name, she always made sure I was taken care of. That if one of us was happy, it was always me,"

Your nose twitches, eyes glossy with a sigh coming from trembling lips. A vague crack sounds in his chest. 

He wishes his hand had the kind of warmth you'd lean into. 

"Losing her best friend, and in a way, losing me ─ has brought her to her knees," your fingers drum, pupils shaking as you will your tears to only exist before your waterline. "I'm doing as much as I can, but there's only so much to do from across the country. I can't check in on her and the house between lectures, I can't pay for anything medical other than some lousy insurance, I can't transfer that weight to myself,"

"Because at least then, it wouldn't be her burden to bear." 

The welled emotions in your chest demand you to straighten, more space for lungs to expand and when stray tears fall, you can only exhale, elbows propped to the table to wipe them away. Your hand falls to the surface in perfect timing, searing skin meeting a cool, steady palm. You're just as still as him, the thump of your heart felt in Sunghoon's fingertips, all the way through to his ears ringing with its race. Only empathy occupies him, remnants of a life before immortality tethering you two together by more than held hands, the quiet compassion he delivers sticking with you forever. 

Time has since passed, that corner booth a bittersweet memory. In spite of long-carried pain, you and your mom see brighter days ─ graduation, your first adult job, the return of her smile. Depression has a way of mystifying the future ahead of you, the present clouded in miserable, inescapable grey clouds. To push on takes all the more effort, so things start to give ─ sleep, appetite and the wither of everything else. While she's managed to pick herself up by the aid of you and others, your mom still holds a keepsake she'd rather do without. A dimmed smile you're doing your best to help restore. But in a household where annual doctor's trips are rare, the luxury doesn't come easy. And by the time you're examining what other expenses to cut back on, Sunghoon pitches his latest project. 

Pearl Bite, for humans and vampires alike. 

Endless trials, modifications, moulds that have bitten the dust and brave participants that bring his dream into fruition. Only now, his dream accounts for not only you, but your mother. Additional modules and clinicals to fit in the study of human teeth, revitalizing the last part of a past your mother is moving forward from. And when everything's said and done, your mother instinctively cowers from the mirror before she weeps, holding onto Sunghoon with a life force as gratitude soaks into his white coat. In the corner, his eyes find you, the water-lined tears in your eyes like then, now reflecting the kind of appreciation and love he knows is priceless. 

Pearl Bite takes off, his humble practice fighting to accommodate for the onslaught of patients he tries helping. People come from far and wide, all with a story that picks at their nails and prompts reluctance when it comes time for Sunghoon's inspection. Overbites, plaque, shaven-down fangs, blood stains ─ the list goes on. However, their reluctance is all but forgotten once he commits himself to their well-being, a sigh of relief filling his mask before he hands over what feels like a magic mirror, sorrow turning into happiness. One practice isn't enough, not for endless clients, or aspiring dentists with the same aspirations. Multiple dot themselves across the country, his time split between sights he flies to (your stomach still drops whenever both your feet leave the ground). He has a line of products, an alternative solution for those he cannot meet and to no surprise, it takes off. You climb your own career ladder, finding something just as meaningful and building your life together with the man who saved yours and your mother's smile. 

His practice bustles as it always does, a mixture of clients flipping through magazines or sharing stories in the waiting room. To his assistance, you wave, your presence always welcome when your schedules align. In the hall leading to his office, your head nods at more waiting patients, smile brimmed in manner with a glance at the clock. 

It's feeding time. 

A flutter in your chest disturbs the peace you've maintained for the day's majority, current sparked as your palm meets the door handle of his office, shallowly pulled to the side only to let yourself in. No one occupies the dental unit, spotlight tucked away with the space sterilised and clean, its sleek hues of white, grey and muted baby blue burrowing comfort in your chest. Attempts to slow the rabbit Sunghoon hears, a heartbeat so attuned to he forgoes his inventory count and goes to filter back into the main room, surprise alight in his eyes as he's urged back. 

"I didn't know you were coming," his voice carries the sentiment, the half-hearted draw of his inventory's door schemed behind you. 

Innocence brims in your smile nonetheless, arms strung around him as his hands fall to your waist, steady and firm. 

"You forgot your dinner."

"Dinner?" a lone eyebrow raises, the slope of his nose in full view as his head turns to the mini fridge metres away. "I should have enough blood bags for─" 

Your nails rake through his nape hairs once and for all, stepping back before you haul yourself on the counter space he'd been working so diligently on, showcasing the dinner he's seemingly left behind.

You. 

No one would bat an eyelash at the length of your skirt, a conservative length if not for an extra long stride ─ the cross of your legs ─ where skin reveals itself, blemishing with incessant teeth marks, beard burn and a mouth pulling into a disbelieving smile as you reveal yourself to him, making sure to crane your neck enough to hint at the location of his last feed. 

"So," mischief lives in the lines of your smirk, your own canines peeking through in an ask. "Will you finish what you started?" 

With centuries spent living amongst vampires and humans, you'd think Sunghoon would have some know-how. Predict the patterns humans have made of themselves, ingrained in wired DNA passed down from generation to generation. Yet, you always seem to surprise him. Bring the disbelieving and amused laughter out his huffing chest, his proximity drawn closer as his hands staple on either side of your thighs, skirt material bunched in your lap, goosebump-riddled from the arctic temperature of his office. 

His eyes burn with a dial of lust, iris colouring into a wine hue before his pupils swallows the field whole, gaze flickered between your eyes and lips. 

"This is risky," he notes, nosing along your jaw. The instinct to give your neck away wears him down more than you'll know. "Anyone could come in and see us. Hear us," 

He deserts the raised skin trail he's created from slight grazes alone, satisfaction on his lips as he creates space to marvel at the mess you're boiling down to. 

"But that's what gets you off, right?" his fangs show, his grin too amused and cocky to shield them, his head tilted to only emphasis his point. "Just can't keep your pretty moans to yourself." 

Air fills your lungs through a nasal inhale, chest slumping with a gulp audible to your own ears. You'd waltzed in here first, you can't lose control just yet. 

You bring yourself closer to the counter's edge, skirt riding up further to expose hints of lace, knowing it'll do nothing but torment him. Taunt him as his canine and lower teeth toy with an inner piece of his check, restraint tested.

"Come on, you haven't fed in days," he's standing straighter, hands off the counter. He's close enough though, the perfect distance for your leg to hook at his lower back and draw him in, your hand waiting before his length eventually throbs in your palm, your grin a work of sin as you peer up at him with dark magic eyes. "I know you're hungry." 

Control is commanded, and to some extent, Sunghoon submits. Lets you carry out your charade, allows the concept of power to exist in your frame of mind. However, deep down, you both know. Undeterred, Sunghoon lets you palm his growing erection, smirking like it doesn't turn him on. Like he doesn't give your hand one grind, starved for friction. 

His hand raises to outline the shell of your ear with his fingertip, pleased with the shiver erupting down your spine. 

"Funny how blood and sex are so intertwined," he leads, voice husky as his eyes fall to yours again, standing their ground. "For you, especially."

It's meant to be a call out. In some measure, you suffer from its consequences, prickly skin and heated cheeks. However, you've been with Sunghoon long enough to quit playing shy. You plan to spend eternity with him too, it's only natural you reward him with your honesty.

"It's another layer of intimacy," the sweetness of your words juxtapose your actions, palm firm against his shaft as your thumb glides over his tip in sweet, torturous motions, smile stretching at the waver of his breath. You cock your head, a call for attention. "Wouldn't you agree?"

He's close like this now, shuffled to you in a tighter circle of your hooked legs, the column of his throat licked. The grain of stubble against your tongue hums your pleasure into his skin, his own mirrored sound coming when your teeth nibble on the teased skin.

"Hmph," he groans, losing focus. Losing to you. "I do, but my mind can't help but wonder," 

Further words peaks your interest, Sunghoon's hand settling across your neck, face further away as he handles you for his viewing pleasure. His other set of knuckles push his glasses up his nose bridge, chin lifted as he looks at you through low eyes, the quiet but hard thump of your pulse meeting the pad of his thumb.

"If it's the euphoric high you're starved for," Sunghoon's thumb moves over the tender skin, thump gaining traction as you attempt withstanding his complete read of you. "Or maybe it's the slight pain," 

Through the time you've known Sunghoon, you've only ever known him to be humble. No matter what feat he reaches, trait or skill he posses and displays, he'll pretend as if it's not his own. Won't gloat, won't brag ─ except for times like these. 

When he's got you right where he wants, his fangs pinpoint on your skin between the fan of his thumb, your heartbeat the equivalent of being chased. 

You hear his smirk first before you see it, space created again as his eyes cannot be without your sight for too long. 

"Which one is it?"

The hand that'd been palming him arrests the counter's edge, knuckles burning white in an act of self-restraint. Control you're being frayed to abandon, a harsh run of your tongue on the back of your teeth as your other leg hooks behind him, nowhere to hide as your hip roll to meet his, a grind you see chipping away at him.

Pressure adds to the grasp on your neck ─ a test to you too. 

"Wouldn't you like to know." 

Again, that almost incredulous yet amused chuckle meets your ears, this time more mocking as Sunghoon's tongue pokes his inner cheek, his eyes bleeding over with an intensity you've only been anticipating.

"I'll find out either way," one corner of his lip lifts, small but all-knowing. "Spread your legs." 

The last thing you'll do is indulge him, even if your body aches for him in the worst way ─ bone deep, lust sinking in your body like an anchor. You're already pressed against him, the friction of few layers a blessing in disguise for someone as insatiable as you are. This, you can do with. The same can't be said for Sunghoon, who in the questioning look he gives you, your smile extends ─ a slice of heaven and a lot of hell. 

"What's with the attitude?" he chuckles, one last squeeze against the sides of your neck to make you squeak. The departures paves the way for his impatience, enough strength to pry your crossed ankles apart. "Didn't you want this all along? Treated the way you are in my office because you couldn't wait?"

You can't compete against an immortal, his strength bending your body to his will, thighs braced against the arctic counter top. Spread to his liking. 

"Ah, that's why," it's the second time in such little time you've heard him smirk, a more evil moon crescent shape to his eyes as he marvels between your legs. Specifically, the wetness that's soaked through the flimsy fabric. "It's okay, I want you just as much." 

A gentle kiss is pressed to your forehead, because your ego has its' moments, bruising like a peach. You could huff, turn away from the supposed affection he gives you, but he's quicker. A peck to the tip of your nose and happiness in the light chuckle he does afterwards. 

Then, when you're looking at him again, albeit reluctantly, he smiles regardless. Cups your cheeks, holding you as if porcelain and kisses you. Soft and pillowy, lingering to savour the simple press of flesh, a slow and sweet swirl back into desire. Melting in his cold grasp, you move in patterns known to each other, the audacity to start pulling away breathing a snicker between your lips, his smile against your lips after he's chased them, your own introduced moments later. 

He picks you apart in the most delicate way, undoing you with adoring kisses and assured hands, consuming you with every breath he steals, hands of desperation hinging themselves against his arms. Sunghoon kisses you as if it's your last, with deeper meaning coming from the lifetimes he's lived, your bottom lip between his teeth as he tugs gently. 

A move applicable to everyone. Doing its worst to you. 

While other teeth tease, his fangs threaten, a harsher skim against the flesh your breath hitches at, a swipe of his tongue meant to soothe, only to fuel the fire burning in you. 

While his hands no longer cradle your face, he kisses you without fault. Pouring affection into the tender overlap of lips, the only thing you manage to do is lift your hips as his hands tug your panties down your legs, tucked away in his back pocket as a souvenir. If you weren't so dazed, you'd make fun of him, like when you'd felt his cock kick when you'd started kissing, the venture of your tongue making him sigh a stuttered breath. 

Smacked lips and laboured breaths no longer only occupy the office/closet space, abundance of slick lapped up on the span of two fingers, the most piled on Sunghoon's fingertips as they tease your entrance, thumb doing slow circles against your clit. 

Fingers carding through his hair, your breath stutters in his mouth. Whines and huffed whimpers bleed into his kiss-stained lips as his fingers push in with no resistance, welcomed as your walls conform to their shape. He stretches you with the scissors of his fingers, the stretch simmering with a touch of discomfort, grinding down to blooming pleasure as you yield, his fingers 'curl pushed into the spot making you see stars. 

"Think I'll give your thighs a break," Sunghoon whispers, your tongue dipped into the curve of his lips. "All those hickeys and beard burn can't be good for you ─ too much friction," 

"N-not enough," you wail, running feverishly hot and without any care, bucking your hips helplessly. "Want ─ more." 

"I've made you such a greedy thing, haven't I?" he murmurs, humming at all the sounds you reward him with ─ vulnerable moans, sloppy kisses you try giving but it's no use. You're gone, in too deep to realise the moment you'd walked into his office, your fate had been sealed. 

Other points deserve attention, is Sunghoon's thought process as he leaves your lips with one last slow kiss, saliva strung between your quivering lips before he peppers his way down your chin, up the curve of your jaw and stops right below your earlobe. You know where he'll go next and it sends a buzz through your every cell, makes you tremble and shake. And before your brain can catch up to the signs, Sunghoon knows too.

Hears the chaos of your heart, the disarray of your pulse and plays along.

"Haven't even got to your neck and you're leaking all over my fingers," he muses, a peck smacked onto the dipped skin before his teeth catch onto the fleshy part, a fang punctured close to where your lone piercing is. An automatic response is relayed by your body. "Squeezing my fingers for all their worth, huh?"

Lolled to the side, a partial part in purpose but the other because your head's swarmed in haziness, twice its weight from Sunghoon consuming you, his non-beating heart having the decency to not prolong your long-awaited ask. He descends, inches but makes his way with the tread of his teeth down your neck column. 

"What happened to that little attitude of yours, sweet girl?" he asks, the squelch and twitch of your body unearthing a rarity in condescending nature. "Did I fingerfuck it out of you, hm? You wanna be my good girl now?"

You nod hard enough to feel the jumble of your brain, cut up into pieces and free-floating in your zero-gravity headspace. 

"You know nods won't do," he's there. The exact spot he feeds from, and it's maddening. The release of adrenaline, the rabbit chase your heart does, nails scraping into marble. 

He noses along the mark, a momentary pause noting how gone he is for you too, intoxicated at the mere scent of your blood before everything crumbles, his willpower the only thing standing as he pries away, looking you in your eyes as he says, 

"Let me hear you say it, princess." 

"I'll─I'll be good," the words slosh in your mouth, lips pressed to muffle your desperate squeaks. "I just─just let me come please?" 

"I'm no animal," dark laughter licks up your spine, stuck in its slouch as Sunghoon's rhythm picks up, fingertips knocking deepest in you, your jaw pried open in silent surprise. "I couldn't deprive you if I tried." 

"Come on, sweet girl," he comes closer, fresh linen scent engulfing you as a kiss lays upon your temple. "The quicker you let go, the faster you get my cock." 

The quicker he'll feed. 

The mere thought is almost like magic, contracting your walls in an impossible squeeze as the coil in your stomach sizzles at the tips of your toes, shooting up to burst through every avenue ─ every pore ─ of your body. Detonating right in the palm of his hand, he kisses your wails away until they subside, fingers working you until you're twitchy and overly sensitive, glossy eyed yet itching to unbutton his slacks. 

"Impatience will get you hurt," is his later comment, letting you mess with the buckle of his belt, metallic clashes resonating through the room. Dripping more slick onto his office counter. "So rushed when you'll struggle taking me."

The last notch of his zipper sounds louder than the rest, your head snapped in his direction. "Now, that you can't mock me for," 

Your eyes drop down to the heavy bulge imprinting through his briefs and slacks, hoping his eyes follow along. 

"I take your literal monster cock like a champ, thank you." 

"Give or take." 

You kiss your teeth, knowing better but still cursing at him in your head.

"Whatever," your eyes roll, pushing enough of his waistband down to get your hand around his cock. Barely, but it's not of the essence. What is is the need his tip heats with, generous precome beaded in his slit your thumbs runs over. A hiss releases in spite of his efforts, met with the cockiness of your grin. "You're the one who needs me here," 

"Blood bags only taste so good," you drawl, pulling him out to get a better handle of his length. Head ducked to dribble spit on his skin as makeshift lube, enveloped by your palm in a mixture with precome as your hand comes up and twists up his veined shaft. Now it's his turn for braced hands on the counter's edge, his grip strong enough to snap the marble in two. The thought ignites lightning in your stomach. 

Your mouth gets the chance for payback ─ hovering over the shell of his pointed one, a lapsed breath released in the anticipation of your words. The slow, tight jerk of your hand. "And none can get you off, so…" 

A huff of defeat ─ still humoured ─ sounds past your shoulder, Sunghoon's back muscles flexing through the white coat ruffling as he pushes off the table, hair slicked back back as his fingers run through dark strands, his pale features accented with a pretty rosy tint. 

Lips swollen with kisses. Skin glittering in the low light.

"You're annoying," his hands swats away yours, his focal point you as your figure reflects in the honey sweet hue of his eyes. "I love you." 

"Love you t─ah!"

Sunghoon had knocked your knees further apart, lined himself with your entrance and now, starts to slide his length in. Ever since your last orgasm, you'd hinged on his counter for the moment his cock would stretch you out, but even if your eyes blindly followed his shifts, you'd got lost in his confession. The sheer honesty and sincerity brimming in his eyes as he said so, his last words to you before you reconnect again as one. 

A frantic hand jumps to secure yourself on one plane of his shoulder, a sharp inhale sucking in all frigid air of his office into your shaken lungs, the bitten back moan he lets slip flooding the glide of his length, inches sparingly used. Yet the thought of being split open remains alive and well. 

"You're good, you can take it." 

It's one of his sentences that doesn't reek of condescension, the kind of sugary encouragement you can't help but want to do your best for, relying on your practiced methods of breathing and trying to relax. Except to accommodate to his size, you're gripping and adjusting, depleting his ability to be gentle with you. In the adjustments you make, one sentence lurks in the misty halls of his mind as he only gives as much as you can take, a hand and grazed-thumb on your hip to ground you. 

"What I'd do to stuff your hole full of me right now…"

Luckily, he doesn't have to do anything. Living up to your words, the inches continue to disappear, the sorest sight for his centuries-vision filled eyes, shoulders coming down in relief with a mouth ajar. Your hand's over the lower half of your stomach, not exposed by your shirt, but Sunghoon knows. 

You feel him there. 

"Remind me," he huffs, stalling for your adjustment, the stretch as delicious as it is a dance around torture. "You take what like a champ?"

Sunghoon gets a kick out of it, this you already know. Somehow, it still makes your jaw tick, the weight cramped in you, making friends with your lower stomach is colossal, enough for an eye twitch and a sharp head turn in his direction.

"Your cock," every word spoken has a letter with a centre part, the disapproving head shake you do continued as your hips shift, leaking tip grinding up into the spongy spot you keen at. "Now move, before I fuck you." 

Sunghoon's sorely mistaken. Painfully hard, yet he still continues ─ cat and mouse game too good to give up. 

"All bark, no bite," he muses, eyes in false moon crescent, hips pulling back to offload the fill of your entrance. "Leave that to the real vampire, huh?" 

Of course he'd leave you with that. Provide you some relief before he eases back into you again, grin shit-eating but eyes attentive, making sure this is pleasurable for you, to which it becomes. Accommodation is never easy, no matter how frequently you fuck, but he makes every grit of your teeth worth it. Falls into slow deep breaths you unknowingly follow and unwind with, moves his cock in and out at any pace you're comfortable with kisses you through it all, praises seared into the skin his lips meet.

A tempo builds, meek whimpers whispered into the hollow of his neck now barely contained moans. Your arms form a loose circle around his shoulders, the groans and whines he saves for your ears swirling a sickening pit of lust in your stomach.

"If only─hmph," you struggle, nails pressing into the fabric of his coat. "You put your mouth to better, fuck ─ use."

Past your ear, his laugh is bright. "You're bewitched,"

The smack of his pelvis against the back of your thighs teases your own teeth into his shoulder, whimpers releasing instead. 

"Are my fangs all I'm good for?"

Turns out, you have your own timing. Comedic timing, it seems, because when you pry from him, mourning the loss of his cool skin, your eyes peer down between your legs. At the cock he uses with you as priority, a simmered sensation you unwind to, wetness drenching his length as the faint bulge of his tip makes itself known. 

"You're good for other things too."

"Unbelievable," you hear your partner laugh, light and breathy because he's so fine-tuned to the human experience, large hands setting themselves up firm against your hips. "Now, if you will, let me do for what I'm good for."

Like you've always known him to be, he prides himself on his craft, making good of his word as he starts pistoning into you, the grind of his pelvis notching against your clit to make you squeal, his shoulders fastened to as the back of your thighs echo with your indecency. You're choking on moans, trying to keep noise to a minimal, but how can you when your vampire boyfriend knows you best? Knows what angle generates current in your body, what pace has you doubling over, holding him because the building pleasure is too immense for how contained your body feels? Knows when to flip the switch with you, the grounding presence you need or the kind that presses you into the ground. 

"My perfect girl," he murmurs, a soothing hand cascading down the back of your head. "I'll never get over how good you feel." 

He isn't the former for long, sheep's skin shed when your eyes start glossing over, legs hooked round his waist with your toes curled, tears of ecstasy saturating his coat's shoulder. How can he when you're basically offering yourself to him, enough distance created for your hands to support you from behind, neck craned for his taking. 

"Is this what you're into?" he asks, the outline of his body unfair under layers of clothing as his cock stuffs you full. "Do you fantasize about being feed on because you feed off the pleasure and pain?" 

You could consider his question, answer truthfully wherever it lies. However, you're a bit preoccupied. The one or two things he's good for working against you, reducing you to a worthless pile of mush, the same matter made of your brain, melted and spilling out your ears, hearing stifled. 

"Answer me." 

Your throat works, suddenly so dry with a swallow for saliva to quench some thirst, vision fuzzy as you fight off the impending doom. 

Not now, not yet. 

"Yes," you respond. "I'm into it because─" 

He notches himself with a particular force, one you do a withered whimper at, pupils shaking as they blow over your iris' ring. 

"Because it's with you," your hand's on his jaw, holding him firm as you add on. "I have a you fetish." 

"Fuck," there's a hitch in Sunghoon's thrusts, a slight hiccup when he disintegrates at your words, head hung only to come back up with the brightest smile on his face. The one you could spend eternity looking at. "You're such a tease." 

"A pretty, sloppy, needy─" emphasis in his stupidly seductive tone matches with the brute of his thrusts, concentrated and attuned to what'll make you break. "─tease." 

Against your forehead, his own falls, a kiss shared as his low body temperature attempts to dial back yours, the coil in your stomach too hot for you to function.

"Good thing you're close because I am too," he nods, one last kiss before he asks. "Do I have the honours?"

It's one of the easiest yes' you'll utter. 

"Always." 

What you could compare the initial seconds of Sunghoon feeding from you to is a piercing. The clamminess of your palms, an escalated heart rate even if you'd mentally prepared for the moment and eyes incapable of focusing. To gain it back, your only function boils down to managing your breaths as anticipation itches beneath your skin.

Then, it happens. 

A momentary flicker of pain, sharpened enamel piercing through skin and sinking, nestling where no vitals are endangered. It's minor, so minor it's forgotten the second after it's felt, the burst of euphoria incomprehensible. Words fail to explain the phenomenon, amounting to a standard you're on a constant chase for, bewitched as Sunghoon so lovingly puts it, him just the same ─ if not worse off ─ as he shamelessly moans at the taste, the vague waft of blood's metallic scent replaced with the blanket of his linen scent. 

Blood and sex are so intertwined, mentioned previously by Sunghoon. And while he'd said this in response to you, the words ring truest for him, a broken moan vibrating into your skin as his hips start rutting, erratic as he surges towards his orgasm. His priority forever and always, he wedges his hand between your bodies, your clit played with to bring you to a similar pace, something like come coating your walls as you squeeze his cock one last time, a cry from your lips before you come undone. 

Eventually, he relents, having had his fill with a pry he holds your body up for, still dazed from the aphrodisiac-like remedy in his venom to seal your skin together. When the world stops moving in separate circles, you catch sight of his fangs, coated in the rich crimson of your blood, only having the energy for a lazy smile before he sorts you two out. An eventual knock echoes at his door, Sunghoon spitting the last of Pearl Bite toothpaste out his mouth, fangs like brand new as you two feign normalcy. 

Like he hadn't fed from you, or how his vampire-equivalent to come isn't leaking between your crossed thighs. 

Just another day at Sunghoon's practice. 

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“you’re late, ki…” 

he hummed behind you, fingers already slipping under the hem of your (his) oversized shirt. “‘m sorry, baby… got carried away,” he muttered. you arched into him on instinct—he knew exactly where to touch, how to make you melt in seconds. 

the way your bodies moved together was effortless.

ni-ki’s mouth found that soft spot below your ear and you sighed, reaching back just enough to thread your fingers through his hair. “hngh—ki… what’re you doing?” you breathed, albeit you knew better. 

his hair was soft and freshly washed. you couldn’t see it properly but the blonde highlights really shined under the dim lights. 

“mmh? can’t i just want my girlfriend?” he whispered against your skin, lips dragging slow and deliberate, voice dipped in that sleepy–rough tone that always made your knees weak.

his hands slipped under your shirt, palm flat against your stomach before they travelled up your tits, cupping and fondling the soft flesh. he pulled you flush against him like he belonged there. “been thinking about you all day… couldn’t wait till mornin’.”

you melted. the way he said is more cocky and needy tonight… with that laziness and confidence laced beneath his tone—your boyfriend must’ve had more drinks that he intended to tonight. your fingers tightened in his hair without meaning to, tugging just enough to earn a low, satisfied hum from him.

“you’re… clingy tonight,” you managed, voice shaky as his teeth grazed your earlobe.

he laughed, barely a breath. “only for you, baby.” 

his hips rolled forward, slow and filthy, positioning his hard on between your ass, grinding against the curve of the flesh. the movement was so him. “mmh… okay… c’mon… ‘m sleepy.” you murmured, already adjusting so ni-ki can press his bulge deeper. 

“but i want you to ride me—wanna see my pretty girl’s face…”

the words melted whatever was left of your sleepiness. you made a soft, needy sound in the back of your throat (half protest, half surrender) and shifted, rolling your hips lazily against the thick line of him.

“so demanding,” you whispered, but already moving, pushing up on your knees. the sheets slid down your body as you turned to face him.

moonlight painted silver across his cheekbones, parted lips, messy black–and–blonde strands falling into his pretty shaped eyes. he looked wrecked already, pupils blown wide, chest rising fast under your palms. 

ni-ki had a sly grin on his face.

you swung one leg over his hips and settled slowly, letting him feel every inch of you through the thin cotton separating you. his hands flew to your waist like magnets, fingers digging in hard enough to leave little crescent marks. 

“fuck—” he hissed, head tipping against the bedrest. “there you go… just like that… move that hips for me, pretty gal,” 

you leaned in, wrapping your arms around his neck and rocketed forward in slow and teasing rhythm. the friction dragged a low groan out of him that vibrated straight through you. 

“happy now?” you breathed against his mouth, giggling softly, lips barely brushing. 

his answer was a sharp upward thrust that made you gasp, followed by that crooked little smirk you knew too well. “not enough, babe,” he hissed, hands now on your hips to guide you on his clothed cock. 

“sit on my cock, c’mon, ride me.” he rasped, instructing. you rolled your eyes playfully but obliged—lifting your hips up just enough for you to push your panties to the side while your boyfriend eagerly pulled his pants and boxers down—all with a boyish grin on his face.

you positioned the head of his cock at your entrance, letting out a small hiss as you slowly sunk down on his cock—the shaft stretching your tight cunt. “ngh—! ki, you—” you gasped, burying your face into the crook of his neck. 

“h—have you always been this big? mhh!” you moan aloud, his cock now fully engulfed in the warmth of your pussy. ni-ki just smirked and shrugged nonchalantly, hands finding your hips again as he pushed you down further on his cock, the head brushing your cervix.

your back arched, hands tangling around his locks. “oh, oh god,” you moaned out his name as he lifted you off his lap before letting you slam back down on his thick cock. with each pounding thrust, the head nestled against your cervix. “h—hah! ah, hngh—? ki, so rough,” 

he moaned as his fingers guided your movements, cock twitching. it dragged against the sensitive tissue of your entrance, your velvety walls clamping around him. “shit, so tight, fuck, wanted this s’bad.” he rasped, balls slapping against the curve of your ass as you rode him. 

his cock throbbed deep in your cunt with no remorse. “so good, ki, so good—more, more—you’re so big!” you threw your head back, fingers clawing at his nape. your boyfriend groaned, softened into a whimper. “fuck, let me see yours tits,”

you hooked your fingers beneath your—his—shirt and pulled it over your head, tossing it to the side. your pretty tits bounced each time ni-ki pounded you up—so lewd, so obscene, so lovely—sight for his sore eyes.

“like it—mmh? you too, ki,” you giggled, taking off his shirt for him before he could say anything. you ran your palms down along his toned chest, leaning down to attack his neck, pressing and rubbing your perky nipples against ni-ki’s ones. 

the stimulation was crazy—your tight pussy spasmed around him, clamping and squeezing him as he snapped his hips against you—eliciting a small, cute, short, meek moan from your lips. “eek—! ah, hah, ki! ‘m close, ‘m close!” you whined, the wet squelching noise filling up the room.

your boyfriend nodded, groping your ass, digging his nails into flesh—his thrusts turned erratic, rough and deep and desperate. “fuck, me too, cum with me, baby—let me cum inside.” he grunted, slapping your ass.

you moaned aloud—back arching as you nodded. your boyfriend was rougher than usual tonight! and you loved it a lot, he’s so rough and needy, touching you and dirty–talking his way in. “uh huh—creampie me, please, please, please,” 

you let out a whimper as you cum on his cock, climax tore through you like an arrow. your boyfriend too—cock twitched as he spurted his cum deep inside, emptying his load and filling you up with his warm semen. 

you whined, burying your face into the crook of his neck, chin resting upon his shoulder as your body went limp—tired from the orgasm. your arms looped loosely around his neck, fingers idly stroking the nape of his neck while the aftershocks still fluttered through you. 

he was breathing hard, hand sliding up your damp in slow, soothing circles. the other tangled in your hair, keeping you flushed against him.

that’s when it hits you—stronger.

your fingertips brushed raised skin… and then the unmistakable tiny ridge of ink.

a small black crescent.

your heart stopped. ni-ki doesn’t have a tattoo. he’d always sworn he would never, and that needles are for losers like his—

twin brother.

he must’ve felt you stiffen, because his hands got tighter on your hips.

and then the smell hits you—curled into your nose. fresh hair dry, the kind that lingers for days after a salon visit. not two–week–old highlights. dead and adrenaline mixing into something dizzying. 

when the moonlight caught the side of his lower back as he shifted beneath you—the crescent tattoo was still there, clearer this time.

the realisation crashed over you like ice water.

“...riki?” 

Sunghoon chose the worse time to come over. Your home was in a state of disarray; boxes against the wall, clothes scattered everywhere, and leftover food on the coffee table from lunch that you’d yet to put away. You were supposed to welcome him to… this?

Before you can even hurriedly clean and shove clothes into the closet, the door knob jiggles a bit. The door opens carefully when Sunghoon pushes inside with his bag in hand. He looks at you like this was normal. Like he was just supposed to walk in when he so desired.

“Hello,” he nods. As if sensing your confusion, he holds up a key and shuts the door behind him. “You gave me a spare, if you remember.”

Suddenly you were cursing the you of five months ago, because why on earth did you give him a key? You can only laugh awkwardly and shift your weight while your eyes dart around your house. He’s judging you. You just know it. He’s judging your modest home—despite the absurdity of a girl your age owning a home—and he’s mentally scrutinizing how messy it is. He has to be.

You never get your confirmation to that, though, because he sits on your couch like he owns the place. Sunghoon beckons you over with a hand and a polite nod, urging you to sit like a guest in your own home.

“You might be wondering why I came. I… well, I needed help choosing centerpieces.”

Centerpieces? Like, the same centerpieces that you’d literally witnessed him choose at the cake tasting? How could he need help with centerpieces? Sunghoon takes out what looks to be a catalog from his bag and clicks his pen, sliding them across the coffee table while skillfully avoiding the leftovers.

“I chose the one circled in red.” Roses, black eyed susans, and daylilies were clustered in a vase in varying shades of yellow and orange on the paper. Frankly, it looked a hot mess. Sunghoon realized it with the grimace on your face. “You don’t like it.” A statement, not a question.

“It’s so… um, wow!” You laugh awkwardly, glancing up at him with a strained smile. You hate it. The flowers look messily clustered together like someone just looked up “yellow flowers” on google and picked the first three that showed up. Who would do such a thing? “It’s definitely something.”

“But… the colors. Are they not beautiful?”

“The yellow and orange is great, just… not like this. Honestly, this is so fucking ugly.” Sunghoon flinches at your straightforwardness. His lips form a weirdly attractive mix of a frown and a pout. Wait, what? Focus.

“Island Citrus is the wedding color of the year. How could you not like it?” His brows pinch together. He truly cannot fathom your dislike for it. He spent hours researching what type of bouquet a woman your age would like and now you’re telling him you hate it..? “Brides magazine said so.”

“Brides what? Sunghoon, nobody cares what some bride blog says. This is terrible,” you can’t help but laugh at his stupidity. Maybe ‘Stolid Sunghoon’ wasn’t so robotic after all.

“Well, which one do you like?” He tilts his head and nods at the catalog. It takes two minutes of silence for you to flip through the catalog and find one you like. Sliding off the couch, you plop down on the floor to lean across the table when you push the catalog back and point at the bouquet.

“Pretty, no?” The bouquet is a complete turn around from what he’d picked. The catalog showed vase holding dark hellebores, black knight scabiosas, and chocolate cosmos. He blinks down you twice. Is he supposed to sit with you? Should he sit on the floor? He doesn’t usually do such a thing. Is your carpet vaccumed? Cleaned? How often do you do it? What if—

“Um, hello? Do you not like it that much?” You furrow your eyebrows with laughter. It snaps Sunghoon out of his trance. With what he considers a brave, noble act, he slides down and sits on the floor as well. His hands rest folded in his lap as he nods.

“It is… dark?” He offers, pressing his lips together. He can’t say he hates it, but it’s just not what he was expecting. “Do you like it?”

“Mhm.”

“Then it’s a done deal.” Sunghoon grabs the pen from your side of the table and circles the bouquet, writing ‘chosen.’ beside it in what’s weirdly the most legible handwriting you’ve ever seen from a man. “Thank you for your help. It was a truly vexing matter.”

Honestly, it was anything but vexing. Sunghoon personally couldn’t care less about a centerpiece; but, he assumed it mattered to you. With his hours of research about what a woman would like, he chose what he thought you’d enjoy. Come to find out you didn’t even think you were being represented in the wedding? That was the last thing he wanted. He’d already been in the area anyway—meaning, he was thirty minutes away and made the drive in fifteen—so why not travel to your place and find your opinion on the matter?

“Right. Well. Glad I could help.” You offer him a small smile that you can only home looks real. An awkward silence overtakes the room. At least, awkward for you. Sunghoon’s buzzing inside with satisfaction thinking he’s finally pleased you. Maybe this way you’ll be more willing to marry him. He’d hate to go into this marriage with your intense hate for him. He’s halfway through daydreaming what you’d name your first born daughter (yes, daughter. the first born must be a daughter, he thinks.) when you cough.

“Oh, right. Well, I… guess I’ll be on my way,” he nods almost solemnly. On the outside, he looks normal. Unaffected, per usual. You’d never think he was silently hoping your children would have your eyes and his moles. Sunghoon pushes himself up, dusting invisible lint off his clothes. He stares down at you expectantly.

What the hell does he want? you wonder. Why’s he looking at you like that? It’s weird. Make him stop. Ugh, stop!

“Aren’t you going to see me off?” He furrows his brows in confusion. Isn’t this the part where you kiss him goodbye?

“Oh, sure.” You stand and lead him to the door, opening it for him. He stands there. Expecting. Waiting. The only things going through your mind are questions about why he’s not out yet.

Sunghoon almost laughs. Ah, he gets it now. You’re shy, aren’t you? That’s okay. He can help you work your way up to a real kiss. Sunghoon leans down to kiss your cheek, his arm sliding around your waist to pull you into a hug right after. He pats your back like he’s done some incredibly good deed before pulling away.

“I’ll see you on Friday at seven for the dinner run through. Goodbye,” he waves and turns on his heel out of the door. 

Did this guy just fucking kiss your cheek?

You’re left staring at his car as it pulls out of your driveway. He doesn’t look back. At least, not by turning his head. He uses his side mirrors, though. You laugh incredulously.

“Fucking weirdo,” you whisper to yourself, shutting the door and turning back to packing up your things. 

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