the core issue was a massive failure of communication.

sunghoon hadn't told her about the upcoming twitch convention the boys had been invited to. it was a massive, five day annual convention that the four of them had religiously attended for the past three years—it was practically a mandatory business trip for their streaming careers. the fatal problem this time, however, was that their anniversary fell directly on the third day of the convention and y/n, wanting to celebrate their milestone, had been secretly planning a massive, intricate surprise trip for ages.

so, when sunghoon casually announced over dinner that he was packing his bags to go away for a week, something inside y/n fractured.

initially, she hadn't yelled. she had swallowed her pride, her voice dropping into an uncharacteristically sweet, fragile tone as she looked across the kitchen island at him. "hoon... please don't go. can't you just stay here with me? just this once?"

but sunghoon, completely blind to the hidden meaning behind her words and focused entirely on the strict contract logistics of the event, had sighed, shaking his head. "i can't just skip it, y/n. it's five days, it's business. don't be unreasonable."

that word—unreasonable—was the spark that blew the dam wide open. y/n's face had gone from sweet to entirely murderous in a split second. the hurt morphed instantly into blinding rage and she finally snapped, revealing the truth in a harsh, bitter volley of words.

"unreasonable?!" y/n slammed her fork down against the ceramic plate, the sharp clank echoing violently in the quiet kitchen. she stood up from her stool, her chair scraping harshly against the floorboards. "our two year anniversary is next thursday, sunghoon! next thursday! i have spent the last four months booking a private cabin, organising your streaming schedule with your manager behind your back so you’d have the days cleared and planning a surprise because i actually thought you cared about our milestones! and you just casually sit there eating chicken, telling me you're leaving the state?!"

sunghoon froze, his piece of chicken halfway to his mouth. his dark eyes widened in sudden, jarring realisation as the date clicked in his head. a heavy, immediate wave of guilt flooded his chest, his stoic mask cracking. next thursday. he had completely, utterly lost track of the days in the chaos of his content schedule.

"y/n... wait," sunghoon started, his deep voice immediately dropping into a softer, urgent register as he set his cutlery down. he rose to his feet, his tall frame looming over the counter as he reached out to try and catch her hand. "i didn't... i honestly didn't realise the dates overlapped. the convention scheduled it a month earlier this year. look at me, love, i'm sorry—"

"do not call me that right now!" y/n hissed, violently slapping his hand away before he could touch her. her eyes were flashing with dangerous, hot tears of frustration, her chest heaving underneath her shirt. "you didn't realise? how do you forget our anniversary, hoon? it happens on the same day every single year! but of course, if it's not a streaming schedule, if it's not a sponsor deck, or if it's not jake and jay asking you to do a co-stream, it doesn't exist in your perfect little brain!"

sunghoon’s jaw set, his own patience taking a direct hit from her sharp words. he ran a frustrated hand through his hair, trying to maintain his calm, but the exhaustion of his own week was starting to bleed through. "y/n, that's unfair and you know it. i feel terrible about the timing, alright? i do. but you can't stand there and act like i don't care about us just because a massive networking event landed on that weekend."

"then cancel it!" y/n commanded, her voice rising to a fierce, unyielding pitch as she crossed her arms tightly over her chest. "if you care, cancel the convention. tell the boys you're staying. it's one year, sunghoon. you've gone to this thing three times already!"

"i can't just cancel a contracted event six days before it starts, y/n! that's not how this works!" sunghoon finally snapped back, his voice rising, matching her volume as his own anger began to blur his logic. he stepped around the kitchen counter, closing the distance between them, his features tightening into a rigid, stubborn line. "there are brand guidelines, panel slots i'm legally locked into and flight bookings. there is absolutely no way i am missing this convention. it's my job."

y/n let out a sharp, bitter and entirely cynical laugh, stepping back away from him as if his presence physically repelled her. the words tore out of her throat before her brain could stop them.

"right. your job," she whispered, her voice dropping into a lethal, icy venom that made sunghoon’s blood run cold. "your job always comes first. why don't you just pack your bags tonight then, hoon? go live at the fucking convention center. because clearly, having a real life with me is just an inconvenience to your algorithm."

sunghoon’s blood ran completely cold before a fierce, dark fury took over his features. his jaw clenched so hard the muscles jumped, his dark eyes narrowing into a dangerous glare. for the past two years, he had been the one to bow first, he was the one who smoothed over her sharp edges, swallowed his own pride and cracked the tension with a soft touch or a blind apology just to keep her happy.

but this time? he didn't give in. he refused to blindly apologise for trying to maintain his livelihood and respect his legal contracts.

"is that really what you think?" sunghoon's voice dropped into a low, terrifyingly steady vibrato. he stared down at her, his posture rigid. "you think you're just an inconvenience to me? if you're going to weaponise my career against me every time a scheduling conflict happens, y/n, then i'm not going to stand here and beg for your permission to do my job. i’m going to the convention."

"fine! go!" y/n fired back, her face twisting in pain before she turned on her heel and marched into the bedroom, slamming the heavy door shut behind her.

and she didn't warm up. not that night and not the morning after. to y/n, the silence in the apartment was a glaring, roaring proof that his work—his pristine, dazzling digital image—was vastly more important than the milestone they had built together.

but beneath the surface of her hot temper lay a much darker, much more agonizing truth that she would never admit out loud. it wasn't just the anniversary trip. it was the crushing, suffocating weight of his female fanbase. y/n knew what she was—she was a stubborn, short-tempered and highly irritable figure in sunghoon's life. every single day, she saw thousands of gorgeous, sweet, entirely tension-free girls flocking to his streams, leaving adoring comments and openly flirting with him. the intrusive, toxic thought that there was someone out there who was softer, kinder and wouldn't pick fights with him always made her physically sick in the head.

sunghoon knew she had a jealousy streak, sure. he knew she hated when people hit on him. but he had absolutely no idea just how deeply it tore her up inside.

only ness knew. y/n would rarely break down, but when the insecurity became too heavy to carry, she would drive over to her cousin’s place, collapsing onto ness' shoulder in tears. “he’s going to get tired of how difficult i am, ness,” y/n had sobbed into her sister’s lap months ago, her fierce armor completely gone. “some sweet, quiet girl is going to smile at him at one of these events, and he’s going to realise how exhausting i am.” ness had held her sister tightly, smoothing her hair and softly whispering comforts, keeping the secret fiercely. she had sworn an absolute oath never to tell jake or sunghoon, taking care of her sister in the dark while y/n put her fierce mask back on for the world.

for the next six days leading up to his departure, the apartment became a frozen war zone. y/n completely withdrew. every single night, she climbed into bed, stuck entirely to her extreme side of the mattress, her back turned to him like an unyielding brick wall.

on the final night before the convention, the silence in the bedroom was deafening. sunghoon lay awake on his back, staring at the ceiling, listening to the quiet, rhythmic sound of her breathing. his anger had long since burned out, leaving behind a heavy, aching hollow in his chest.

he hated leaving like this. he hated the distance.

slowly, sunghoon shifted. he slid across the mattress, closing the wide gap between them until his broad chest pressed directly against her rigid back. he reached out, his long, heavy arm sliding around her waist, pulling her smaller frame flush against his torso. he buried his face in the crook of her neck, inhaling the sharp, familiar scent of her shampoo.

"y/n..." sunghoon murmured, his rough voice dropping into a quiet, incredibly weary plea against her skin. "please. i'm leaving tomorrow morning. can we just... can we just sleep facing each other for one night? can you look at me? please?"

y/n stayed completely rigid. she froze in his embrace, her hands clutching the edge of the duvet, refusing to relax a single muscle. she didn't answer him. she didn't move. she couldn't. she was terrified that if she opened her mouth, she would scream or beg him to stay, or lay bare all the pathetic, trembling insecurities she fought so hard to hide.

and unknown to sunghoon in the dark, hot, silent tears were already flowing freely from her wide eyes, spilling over her nose and soaking into the plush fabric of her pillow. her throat ached from the sheer force of holding back a sob.

sunghoon waited in the heavy darkness, hoping for a sign, a shift, or a soft squeeze of his hand. when nothing came, he let out a long, heavy and thoroughly defeated sigh that fanned warm against her skin. he leaned in, pressing a soft, lingering and deeply sad kiss to the back of her neck.

"that’s alright," he whispered hoarsely, tightening his arm around her waist anyway, refusing to let her go even if she hated him right now. "i've still got you. i love you, baby."

the harsh glow of dawn hadn’t even broken past the horizon when sunghoon’s alarm silently vibrated under his pillow at 5:00 am. he turned it off instantly, the heavy, dark silence of the bedroom settling back over him. he sat up slowly, the cool morning air biting at his bare chest as he looked down at the girl sleeping beside him.

y/n was tucked under the heavy duvet, but she didn't look peaceful. even in her sleep, her brow was slightly furrowed, her breathing shallow and uneven, her small hands clutching the edge of the blanket tightly near her chin. her face looked pale and exhausted, the faint, dry tracks of last night's secret tears barely visible in the dim morning shadows.

sunghoon’s heart clenched violently at the sight. the guilt that had been simmering in his chest for the last six days flared into a sharp, painful ache. he leaned down, lingering over her for a long moment, before pressing a soft, reverent kiss to the side of her face. his lips brushed her temple, his thumb gently smoothing over her brow to try and ease her tension. she let out a tiny, restless whimper in her sleep but didn't wake.

i'm sorry, love, he thought, his throat tightening.

he quietly slid out of bed, got dressed in a comfortable grey tracksuit and grabbed his packed suitcase from the closet. before he reached for the doorknob, he walked over to her nightstand. he grabbed the thick, textured white envelope on his desk. inside was a letter he had spent three hours writing the night before—spilling every single unfiltered, vulnerable emotion he usually kept locked behind his stoic mask, explaining his fears, his devotion and how much he worshipped her, short temper and all.

on the front, in his neat handwriting, he had written: to my y/n. open this on thursday.

their anniversary.

he set it gently next to her phone, placing a small glass paperweight over it so the morning breeze wouldn't blow it away. sunghoon walked back to the edge of the mattress, bending down to press one final, long kiss against her cheek.

"i love you, my y/n," he whispered into the quiet room, his voice cracking slightly with a raw, heavy emotion. he pulled back, quickly using the back of his hand to wipe away a single, stray tear that had escaped his own eye, before wheeling his suitcase out of the apartment and closing the door behind him.

the international terminal of the airport was already bustling with travelers by 6:30 am. the sharp scent of roasted coffee beans and terminal air conditioning filled the space as sunghoon walked toward the designated terminal gate.

from a distance, he easily spotted the group. heeseung was leaning against a pillar, scrolling through his phone with a pair of headphones around his neck, while jay was adjusting the strap of his carry-on bag and right in the center of the terminal seating area were jake and ness.

true to her dedicated girlfriend routine, ness had insisted on driving jake to the airport despite the ungodly hour. she was clearly half-asleep, her frame completely engulfed in one of jake’s oversized black hoodies, her eyes barely open. she was practically dead weight against him, her arms wrapped tightly around jake’s waist while her face was buried deeply in the crook of his neck.

sunghoon stopped a few feet away, his suitcase handle burning into his palm as his heart clenched sharply at the display of pure, uncomplicated affection. a heavy wave of longing and envy washed over him. he missed his girl so much it physically pained him and he hadn't even boarded the plane yet. he would give anything to have y/n clinging to him like that right now, even if she was lecturing him about his packing list.

jay was the first to notice him approaching. "hey. hoon’s here."

jake slowly pulled back from ness, keeping a supportive hand on her waist so she wouldn't topple over in her sleepy state. he looked at sunghoon, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion as he scanned the space behind him. "hey, man. where’s y/n? did she drop you off at the curb?"

sunghoon forced a neutral, completely unbothered shrug, adjusting the straps of his backpack to mask the sudden tight knot in his throat. "nah. she was just way too tired to come by this morning. work has been brutal on her this week, so i told her to just stay in bed and sleep in. it’s totally okay."

jay and heeseung both offered understanding nods. "yeah, makes sense. it’s way too early anyway," jay muttered.

but ness didn't nod. the second sunghoon said those words, her heavy eyelids opened for a second, the sleepiness instantly evaporating from her eyes. she knew y/n. knew how she was a lot of things, but she loved fiercely and if things were good, y/n would have dragged herself out of bed at 3:00 am in a blizzard just to glare at sunghoon at the security gate and tell him to come back in one piece. for y/n to skip dropping him off entirely meant a complete catastrophe had occurred.

the overhead intercom crackled to life, announcing the final boarding call for their flight.

"alright, boys, that’s us. let's move," jay said, picking up his duffel bag.

as they gathered their things, ness stepped forward to say goodbye to the group. she gave jay and heeseung quick, warm hugs, telling them to stay safe and get tons of souvenirs back for her. then she stepped up to sunghoon.

when she threw her arms around his neck for a goodbye hug, she didn't pull away immediately. instead, she leaned her head close to his ear, her voice dropping into a quiet, deeply concerned whisper that the other boys couldn't hear.

"hoon..." ness murmured softly, her small hand gently patting the back of his shoulder. "is y/n really okay? did something happen between you two?"

sunghoon squeezed his eyes shut, the heavy armor he had been wearing all morning finally fracturing under ness’ gentle presence. he let out a long, ragged and thoroughly defeated sigh against her shoulder, his broad shoulders dropping. he pulled back to look down into her worried eyes.

"no, ness. she’s not okay," sunghoon admitted hoarsely, his voice tight and dripping with a raw, quiet desperation. he looked at ness, his eyes pleading. "we had a really bad fight about the convention and she’s... she’s completely furious with me and she wouldn't even look at me before i left. please... can you just go check on her? take care of her for me while i'm gone? she’s a lot more fragile right now than she lets on."

ness’ expression immediately softened into a look of deep, aching sympathy. the pieces of the puzzle instantly clicked in her mind—she remembered y/n’s breakdowns about her insecurities and the fear of losing him to his fanbase. she offered sunghoon a firm, reassuring nod, her small hand moving up to squeeze his arm securely.

"i knew something was wrong," ness whispered softly, her voice filled with an absolute, unyielding determination. "don't worry about a single thing, hoon. i’ll go straight to her and stay the week. i won't leave her side, i promise.”

a profound wave of relief washed over sunghoon, the tight knot in his chest loosening just a fraction. he managed a faint, incredibly grateful smile. "thank you, ness. seriously. you have no idea how much that means to me."

"of course. now go, before you miss your flight," she smiled gently, patting his chest.

sunghoon thanked her one last time, giving her a final squeeze before stepping back to join jay and heeseung down the boarding ramp. ness turned back around, instantly melting right back into jake's open arms for a final goodbye.

the quiet click of the front door unlocking cut through the suffocating silence of the apartment. y/n didn’t move. she remained completely frozen on her side of the bed, her eyes wide open, staring blankly at the dark accent wall. she had been awake since 5:00 am, listening to the agonizingly quiet sounds of sunghoon packing, the soft press of his lips against her face and the devastating click of the door closing behind him.

"y/n? y/n… it's me."

ness’ voice was a soft, cautious whisper down the hallway. she used her spare key, stepping quietly into the master bedroom. the blinds were still drawn, plunging the room into a heavy twilight. the second ness’ eyes adjusted to the dimness and she saw how completely emotionless and hollow y/n looked—lying there like a ghost under the heavy duvet—her heart dropped.

"oh, y/n..." ness breathed. she dropped her bag onto the floor and practically ran to the side of the bed, climbing onto the mattress and sinking onto her knees beside her sister.

y/n didn't even flinch when the mattress dipped. her face was pale, her expression completely vacant, stripped of the fierce, unyielding armor she usually wore for the world.

ness leaned down, her small hands incredibly tender as she reached out, gently brushing a stray lock of dark hair away from y/n’s forehead. her eyes swam with an immediate, deep sympathy. "y/n, talk to me, please. sunghoon told me at the airport. look at me, please?"

the sheer, maternal sweetness in ness’ voice was the exact catalyst y/n couldn't fight. her breath caught in her throat. her bottom lip quivered violently and within a fraction of a second, the emotionless facade completely shattered. a harsh, ragged sob tore out of y/n’s chest and she scrambled forward, burying her face directly into ness’ lap.

ness’ own voice cracked under the sheer weight of her cousin's agony. "i've got you. i'm right here," she whispered, her eyes welling with tears as she wrapped her arms tightly around y/n’s shaking shoulders, rocking her back and forth on the bed.

"he left, ness," y/n choked out, her words slurring through a torrent of hot, violent tears that soaked right through ness’ sweatpants. "he actually... he actually just packed his bags and walked out the door. it’s our anniversary next thursday. our two year milestone..."

"i know, i know," ness murmured softly, smoothing her hand down y/n’s back in steady, calming strokes.

"i planned everything," y/n cried, her voice rising into a breathless, desperate pitch as the months of hidden effort poured out of her. "i spent four months coordinating with his manager to clear his schedule. i booked a private cabin up north. i wanted to surprise him so badly because i thought... i thought for once, we could just be normal. but he didn't even realise the dates overlapped. he just told me it was a contract. he told me it was his job."

y/n pulled back slightly, her face completely flushed, her eyes glassy and wild with a deep, agonising panic. her fingers dug tightly into ness’ wrists. "and my mind is completely killing me, ness. i can’t stop thinking about it. he’s at that convention right now, surrounded by thousands of beautiful, sweet, perfect girls who don't pick fights with him. girls who don't have a short temper. girls who aren't a stubborn, irritating burden like i am."

ness’ chest ached terribly at the raw confession. she hated seeing her fierce, brilliant sister reduced to such a fragile, insecure state.

"y/n, listen to me," ness suggested softly, her voice brimming with a gentle but firm reason as she wiped a tear from y/n’s cheek. "you cannot keep keeping this inside. it's eating you alive. when sunghoon gets back or even when he calls you tonight, you need to sit down and talk to him about the fan issue. you need to tell him how much it hurts you."

y/n immediately shook her head violently, her breathing turning shallow and erratic as a wave of intense nervousness and anxiety took over. she pulled away completely, curling her knees tightly against her chest and hiding her face.

"no! no, i can't do that, ness," y/n whimpered, her voice trembling with a terrifying certainty. "if i tell him that... if i admit to him how pathetic and insecure i am about his chat and his female followers, it’s just going to give him more of a reason to leave me. he’s going to look at me and realise i’m even more suffocating and difficult than he thought. he'll realise a sweet, tension-free girl from his fanbase is a million times easier to love than i am."

ness let out a soft, aching sigh, her heart breaking because she knew none of that was true. she knew just how deeply, unconditionally sunghoon loved y/n. she had seen the way sunghoon looked at y/n when she wasn't paying attention—like she was the only permanent fixture in his universe. she had just heard his voice crack at the airport, desperately begging her to take care of his girl.

but looking at y/n right now, huddled in a tight ball of anxiety and tears, ness realised her cousin was completely beyond belief. no amount of logical reassurance from a sister was going to cure this heartbreak. y/n didn't need a lecture from her. she needed to hear it directly from him.

"okay. okay, hey, breathe," ness murmured, sliding closer and wrapping her arms around y/n's curled frame, pulling her back into a secure embrace. "i'm not going anywhere. i'm staying right here with you."

as y/n quietly wept against her shoulder, ness’ gaze drifted to the nightstand. there, resting quietly under a small glass paperweight, was the thick white envelope sunghoon had left behind. ness squeezed her sister a little tighter, a small, knowing spark of hope returning to her chest. the week was going to be long, but thursday was coming.

the heavy vibration of ness’ phone buzzed loudly against the wooden nightstand, breaking the somber silence of the guest bedroom. she checked the screen to see jake’s handsome face popping up on a facetime call.

ness immediately shifted on the bed, adjusting her posture so her back was completely turned toward y/n, who was still curled into a tight, fragile ball beneath the covers, her breathing slow and exhausted. ness knew exactly how nosy and oblivious jake could be at times. if he caught even a single glimpse of y/n’s red, swollen eyes or the hollow state of the apartment, he would start asking a million unnecessary questions and the last thing y/n needed right now was an interrogation.

the call was quick: her asking him about the flight, him telling her about how heeseung and jay were both already fighting over beds. she cut the call soon enough with some excuse about dinner and luckily her undoubting boyfriend bought it.

as soon as the screen went black, ness let out a long, quiet breath, the fake smile sliding off her face. she turned back around, gently pulling the duvet a little higher over y/n’s shoulders.

across the state, inside the bustling hotel suite, jake threw his phone onto the mattress and stretched his arms over his head. he walked over to the main living area of the suite, where sunghoon was sitting quietly on a sleek leather armchair, a single suitcase resting neatly by his feet.

"hey, hoon," jake called out, grabbing a bottle of water from the mini fridge. "just talked to ness. she said she's officially moved into your place for the week to keep y/n company."

sunghoon didn't look up immediately. he just offered a slow, tight nod, his long fingers mechanically scrolling through his phone screen. his expression was completely blank, a stoic mask that masked the fierce, anxious storm currently raging in his chest. "yeah. ness told me at the airport she'd stay with her. it's good."

"cool. let me know if you need to borrow that charger," jake added, sensing the heavy, unapproachable wall his friend had built up, before walking off to find jay.

left alone in the quiet corner of the room, sunghoon stopped scrolling. he opened his messaging app, his thumb hovering over y/n's contact. his chest felt incredibly tight. he hated the silence between them, hated that the last image he had of his girl was her rigid, frozen back in the dark.

taking a deep, ragged breath, he quickly typed out a message.

from hoon🐧 hey baby we landed awhile back we’re at the hotel now are you awake love? are you okay to talk on a quick call? i wanna hear your voice

back in the quiet bedroom, y/n’s phone lit up on the nightstand. she reached out with a trembling, pale hand, pulling the device under the covers with her like a shield. reading the text, a sharp, physical ache pierced her heart. she wanted to hear his voice so badly it made her stomach turn, but the suffocating voice of her own anxiety screamed louder. 

‘if you call him, you'll just cry, you'll make a scene. you'll remind him how difficult you are compared to the fans waiting for him downstairs.’

with a shaking thumb, she typed back a single, freezing response.

from my lil fire baby no don't want to talk rn.

sunghoon stared at the dry response, the cold finality of it cutting right through his resolve. he closed his eyes for a brief second, forcing down the defensive spike of frustration that usually flared when she shut him out. he remembered what ness had told him at the airport—*she’s a lot more fragile right now than she lets on.* he knew he couldn't push her. not this time.

he slowly typed back, his words deliberate, soft, and completely dripping with unconditional affection.

from hoonie 🐧 it’s okay baby i understand u must be exhausted from work eat something good for dinner pls i'm thinking about you every second i love you so much

under the heavy blankets, y/n stared at the glowing screen, her chest heaving as a fresh, heavy wave of tears silently spilled over her eyelashes. the sweet, unyielding warmth of his words didn't make her feel better—it made her feel infinitely worse.

unable to formulate a reply that wouldn't betray her complete emotional breakdown, y/n slowly locked her phone. she set it face down on the mattress, leaving his beautiful, loving text completely on read, before burying her face back into the tear-soaked pillow to weep in the dark.

the first day of the convention was an absolute, unmitigated meat grinder. even for handsome, famous twitch streamers with millions of followers like the four of them, the sheer volume of human energy in the convention center was completely exhausting.

officially, the first day wasn't even supposed to have any public programming. it was strictly a closed door orientation—a quick walkthrough of the massive venue layout, technical sound checks for their upcoming panels and a thorough rundown of the schedule for the next four days. but the absolute chaos of the internet never adhered to logistics. word of their arrival had leaked online within minutes of their landing, and a massive horde of eager fans had managed to bypass the primary barriers, crashing into the restricted creator corridor.

suddenly, the four boys were surrounded.

while they weren't technically authorised or prepared to host an official meet and greet that day, their natural professionalism and deep gratitude for their community took over. they complied without a single complaint. for nearly two hours, they stood in the crowded hallway, greeting fans, posing for frantic selfies and signing everything from phone cases to mousepads while the venue security team aggressively pushed back the perimeter to escort them out.

by the time 6:00 pm rolled around, the four of them practically crawled back into their private hotel suite, entirely drained to the bone. they still had a full hour left before their mandatory sponsor dinner, so they scattered into their own corners to desperately recharge their batteries.

heeseung and jake immediately grabbed their swim trunks and headed down to the rooftop pool, desperate to wash off the claustrophobic heat of the convention center. jay, completely tuned out from the world, was tucked into the corner of the plush sectional couch, his face illuminated by a soft, besotted smile as he chatted away on a facetime call with jungwon, checking in on his day.

and sunghoon was, well, worried. completely, paralyzingly worried.

he sat at the desk in the corner of his room, still wearing his black tracksuit, his eyes burning hole after hole into his phone screen. y/n hadn’t texted him back at all since she abruptly shut down his offer for a call hours ago. there was absolutely nothing from her. and even more alarming, there was dead silence from ness too. the void of information was making his mind play out every worst-case scenario.

unable to take the agonizing silence for another second, sunghoon opened his chat with ness and typed out a message with a trembling thumb.

from sunghoon hey ness sorry to bother you i haven't heard from y/n all day and i’m kinda losing my mind a little bit haha is she okay? did she eat today?

to his immense relief, the three typing bubbles appeared instantly.

from ness hey hoon! u're not bothering me at all don't worry, she's okay i made her some homemade soup for lunch and she actually finished the whole bowl we even went for a quiet walk around the park down the street to get some fresh air she actually just fell asleep a little while ago, so she's resting

sunghoon let out a long, heavy sigh of relief, his broad shoulders physically dropping as some of the agonizing tension left his body. he pinched the bridge of his nose, typing back quickly.

from sunghoon thank god thank you so much, ness srsly, i owe you did she... did she say anything about me? did she talk at all?

a long pause stretched over the screen before the typing bubbles reappeared.

from ness no.. i'm sorry, hoon she didn't really talk much today she's just truly, completely battered down just give her a little bit of time, okay? keep texting her sweetly and dw i'm taking care of her!

sunghoon stared at the screen, a profound, hollow ache settling deep into his chest. "damn it," he muttered hoarsely to the empty room, locking his phone and dropping his head into his hands. he felt so utterly helpless being miles away, trapped in a business contract while his girl was breaking down in their apartment.

but what ness had purposefully, fiercely omitted from that text message was the true horror of what had actually transpired just two hours prior.

she didn't mention the part where y/n had been sitting on the living room rug, her hands shaking as she opened twitter. she didn't tell him how y/n's eyes had glazed over with tears as she watched hundreds of gorgeous, ecstatic girls post HD photos of the four boys at the venue layout orientation—tagging sunghoon, raving about how devastatingly handsome he looked in person and filling his notifications with thousands of explicit thirst comments, marriage proposals and declarations of love.

the sight had acted like a brutal, crushing vice on y/n's lungs. toxic intrusive thoughts had slammed into her brain so violently it threw her into a massive, terrifying panic attack.

y/n had collapsed against the coffee table, clutching her chest, gasping frantically for air that wouldn't come while tears poured down her face. ness had dropped everything, rushing to the floor to pull her tightly into her arms, rocking her through the hyperventilation, whispering soft, rhythmic anchors into her ear until y/n’s breathing finally stabilised and she fell into a state of total, emotionally exhausted slumber.

ness sat in the dim light of y/n's bedroom, watching her pale, resting face. she knew sunghoon loved her cousin with everything he had—but as she remembered the absolute terror in y/n's eyes during the attack, she knew this week was going to be an uphill battle against the demons in her sister's head.

thursday came by far sooner than y/n ever expected, arriving with a heavy, looming finality that she had been dreading since the night of their argument.

the past few days had been a blur of exhausting silence but as the clock slowly ticked closer to midnight on wednesday evening, y/n found herself completely unable to sleep. ness was fast asleep in the guest room, leaving y/n alone in the vast, empty master bed. with a trembling hand, she pulled her phone out and opened her camera roll. she spent the agonising hours leading up to midnight just scrolling through hundreds of photos and videos of her and sunghoon.

there were so many cute, stupid ones that she had forgotten about—videos of sunghoon completely failing a tiktok dance trend she forced him to try, his eyes turning into crescents as he threw his head back in a bright, loud laugh. photos of him deeply asleep on her lap on a train ride, his long lashes casting shadows on his cheeks while she pulled a funny face at the camera. watching them made a faint, involuntary laugh bubble up in her throat, a sharp contrast to the dull, suffocating ache in her chest. ‘we used to be so easy,’ she thought, a tear slipping down her cheek. ‘when did i become so difficult?’

then, the digital clock on her lock screen flashed: 12:00 am.

instantly, a text notification banner popped up from the top of her screen.

from hoonie 🐧 happy two years, my love i know things are heavy right now and i know you're mad at me but meeting you is still the best thing that has ever happened to my life. i love you more than words can say happy anniversary, baby

y/n’s breath hitched completely. she opened the chat, staring at the glowing screen as she read his sweet, unyielding message over and over again, her vision blurring as a fresh wave of tears flooded her eyes. every single word felt like a warm blanket she didn't deserve. she hovered her fingers over the keyboard, trying to formulate a reply that wouldn't sound broken, but before she could type a single letter, the screen suddenly changed.

the phone began to vibrate violently in her hand, sunghoon's contact photo—y/n kissing his dimple as he grinned widely at the camera—filling the screen as an incoming voice call bar slid down.

y/n froze. her heart hammered against her ribs, a thick wave of hesitation and intense anxiety washing over her. she stared at the green answer button, her thumb trembling.

‘don't pick up, you'll ruin it. you'll cry.’

but the sheer, desperate longing to hear his voice after six days of agonising silence overrode her defense mechanisms. she swiped the screen and pressed the phone tightly to her ear.

"hoon...?" she whispered, her voice barely a breath.

on the other end of the line, sitting on the edge of his hotel bed in a dark room, sunghoon let out a long, ragged gasp, a profound wave of relief crashing down on him so hard his shoulders physically sagged. he had been terrified she would let it ring out. but true to his promise to himself, he didn't push her. he didn't pressure her with demands of ‘where have you been?’ or ‘why have you been ghosting me?’ he just closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the headboard.

"happy anniversary, y/n," sunghoon murmured, his deep, velvety voice dropping into an incredibly raw, thick register. he took a shaky breath, a sudden, emotional crack in his voice betraying just how close he was to the edge himself. "i love you so, so much. i miss you so fucking much, baby. you have no idea."

the sheer weight of the raw devotion in his tone sent a violent shudder through y/n’s entire body. the heavy tremble in her breathing carried perfectly through the sensitive microphone of her phone, a soft, hitching gasp that instantly caught his attention.

sunghoon's brow furrowed, his heart breaking into a million pieces in the quiet hotel room. "y/n...? love, are you crying? please don't cry."

y/n immediately pinched the bridge of her nose, forcing her facial muscles to tighten as she desperately tried to construct a flat, unbothered tone to hide her complete emotional breakdown. "no. i'm not crying, hoon. i'm fine. happy anniversary to you too."

sunghoon knew her too well to believe the lie but he chose to accept it, just grateful she was talking to him at all. "yeah? good," he softly chuckled, his tone turning warm and gentle.

to ease her obvious tension, sunghoon took the reins of the conversation, launching into long, detailed stories about the first official day of the convention. he told her about the chaotic orientation, the ridiculous panels heeseung had accidentally wandered into, and a funny argument jay and jake had over a terrible design layout in the main hall. y/n listened quietly, curled tightly beneath the heavy sheets, her lips subtly parting into a genuine, soft smile at his storytelling. for a brief moment, the suffocating shadows of her jealousy and anxiety were entirely pushed away by the familiar, comforting rhythm of his voice.

she replied mostly in short, quiet responses—“yeah?”, “that sounds silly, hoon”, “did jake really do that?”—but sunghoon didn't care. he took every single syllable greedily, memorising the cadence of her voice like a man dying of thirst in a desert.

they talked for nearly forty minutes before a comfortable, sleepy lull settled over the line. sunghoon cleared his throat softly, his voice dropping into a quiet, tentative whisper.

"y/n?"

"mmh? yeah?"

"did you... did you read the letter i left on your nightstand before i left?" sunghoon asked, his fingers nervously tracing the fabric of his hotel blanket.

y/n’s eyes drifted to the dark corner of the room, where the thick white envelope was still resting safely under the small glass paperweight. "no. i haven't touched it yet."

sunghoon let out a soft, understanding hum, a gentle, pleading edge bleeding into his tone. "that’s okay. but please... promise me you’ll read it whenever you can today. i put everything in there, y/n. everything i'm too stubborn or stupid to say out loud when we're bickering. just read it for me, okay?"

y/n swallowed the tight lump in her throat, her fingers clutching the phone tighter. "okay, hoon. i'll read it."

"thank you, baby," he whispered softly, his voice full of a quiet, hopeful warmth. "get some sleep now. i'll text you the second i wake up tomorrow."

the next morning, the city outside was painted in a pale, humid light. inside the apartment, y/n sat on the edge of the unmade bed, her keys and phone already packed into her bag for work but she couldn't bring herself to move. there was a thick, unyielding lump in her throat that she just couldn't shake. it felt heavy, pressing against her windpipe, making every breath feel shallow.

from the hallway, the soft, rhythmic rustle of clothing signaled that ness was already up and prepping for her day at the clinic. ness poked her head into the bedroom, her face holding a touch of morning grogginess but filled with immediate concern.

"hey," ness called out softly, her voice a comforting balm in the quiet room. "how are you feeling this morning? did you sleep a little better after talking to hoon?"

y/n didn't look up, her eyes glued to the floorboards. she just let out a low, tired hum. "yeah. i'm fine, ness. just tired."

"are you sure?" ness stepped closer, leaning against the bedpost and peering down at her cousin. "i can make you a quick iced coffee before we head out. you look like you're a million miles away."

"no, it's okay. don't worry about it," y/n murmured, offering a faint, tight smile to ease her worry. "go finish getting ready. i'll be out in a minute."

"okay. don't forget to drink some water," ness said gently, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze before heading back toward the bathroom.

left alone again, y/n's gaze automatically drifted back to the nightstand. there, resting under the heavy glass paperweight, was the pristine white envelope. the crisp, neat strokes of sunghoon’s handwriting spelling out to my y/n. open this on thursday felt like a magnet pulling at her attention.

she had been intentionally stalling all morning. she had spent an extra ten minutes in the shower, meticulously ironed her blouse and reorganised her work bag—anything to avoid picking up that piece of paper. her mind, deeply scarred by its own toxic insecurities, kept warning her against it.

‘don't open it. what if it's full of hidden frustrations? what if reading his perfect, polite words just makes you feel ten times worse about how difficult and broken you are compared to everyone else?’

but it bugged her. it gnawed at the edges of her brain until the curiosity and the sheer, desperate longing for him became completely unbearable.

with a shaky, uneven breath, y/n slid off her shoes and sat cross-legged back on the center of the bed, her work clothes slightly wrinkling beneath her. she reached out, lifted the glass paperweight, and took the envelope into her hands. the texture of the paper was heavy and expensive. carefully, as if she were handling a fragile piece of glass, she slid her thumb under the seal and pulled out the folded pages inside.

the scent of his familiar, clean cedarwood cologne faintly drifted from the paper, hitting her senses so fast it made her eyes instantly sting with unshed tears. she unfolded the pages, tracing her fingers over the sharp, elegant cursive script that filled the sheets from top to bottom.

—

to my y/n,

if you're reading this, it means it's thursday and it’s officially our two year anniversary.

i'm currently writing this late at night, looking at your back while you sleep on the opposite side of the bed. you've been facing away from me for six days now and honestly, it’s the hardest thing i’ve ever had to endure. i know you're furious with me. i know you think i don't care about our milestones or that i've prioritised my streaming contracts over the life we've built. i know i’m stubborn and i know i don’t always say the right things when your temper flares, but please, read these words and believe them.

i don't want anyone else.

i have never wanted anyone but you from the exact moment you crashed into my life. i know under all the temper, you get anxious. i see the way you try to push your jealousy away for me, baby and i see you trying to be ‘easier’ for me.

but 'easy' isn't what i want. i don't want a fan, y/n. i don't want someone who only sees the polished, curated version of me under the stream lights. i want you.

i want you with your sharp wit, your fierce intelligence and yes, even your crazy, unpredictable temper because it means you feel things deeply. you are my anchor. when the digital world gets too loud and exhausting, coming home to your chaotic, beautiful energy is the only thing that keeps me sane.

everything i am doing right now, every grueling hours-long stream, every legally binding contract, every corporate panel at this convention, it isn't because i love the job more than you. it's because i am building our future. i am working myself to the bone right now so that very soon, i can give you absolutely everything you’ve ever wanted. the private cabins, the trips, the house we talked about. i want to provide a life for us where you never have to worry about a single thing.

i am going to marry you, y/n. that is my end game. i am going to give you my last name, buy that house with the big windows you like and spend the rest of my life learning how to smooth over your sharp edges every single time we bickering. you are not a burden to my life; you are my life.

so please, stop hiding from me in the dark. stop letting your anxiety tell you that you aren't enough. you are my entire universe, short temper and all.

i love you, baby. happy anniversary.

forever yours, hoon

—

by the time y/n reached the final line, her vision was completely obscured by a thick, heavy sheet of tears. the letters on the page blurred into illegible streaks of ink.

what sunghoon had written absolutely, completely floored her. the words shattered every single toxic defense mechanism, every ugly insecurity and every terrifying doubt she had been feeding herself for the past week. he didn't want a sweet, tension-free fan. he wanted her. he was planning a marriage. he was working for them.

a choked, ragged sob tore completely out of her throat, breaking the heavy quiet of the apartment. she clutched the letter tightly against her chest, right over her racing heart, bowing her head as the tears poured uncontrollably down her flushed cheeks. it wasn't a panic attack this time—it was the overwhelming, crushing weight of realisation. she was loved. so entirely, unconditionally loved by the man she had been punishing.

the bathroom door flew open, and ness came running down the hallway, her car keys jingling in her hand. "y/n?! what's wrong—"

ness froze in the doorway, her eyes wide as she saw her sister sobbing on the center of the bed, the white papers crushed against her blouse. her gaze shifted to the empty nightstand, and a soft, knowing, and deeply relieved smile broke across ness’ face.

she dropped her keys, instantly walking over to climb onto the mattress and wrap her arms tightly around her. "you read it," ness whispered fondly, rocking her. "i told you, dummy. i told you how much he loves you."

"i've been... i've been so awful to him, ness," y/n sobbed out, her voice cracking into a million pieces as she clung to her sister, the lump in her throat finally dissolving into pure, healing tears. "he wants to marry me... and i wouldn't even look at him before he left."

y/n didn’t care about the logistics anymore. she didn’t care that the digital clock on her nightstand read just after 5:00 am across the state line, or that the boys were likely deep in a sleep deficit after consecutive days of panels. the terrifying wall of stubborn pride and toxic anxiety that had kept her paralyzed for a week had been completely pulverised by the pages in her hands. she needed to hear his voice. she needed it like air.

with her hands trembling so violently she could barely type, she scrambled for her phone on the mattress, pulled up his contact and hit the call button.

on the other end of the line, in a silent, shadowed hotel room, sunghoon was already half-awake, his internal clock shot from stress. the moment his phone violently buzzed on the nightstand and y/n’s name flashed across the screen in the pitch black, a sharp shot of pure adrenaline slammed through his system. a heavy, terrifying worry flared in his chest. ‘at 5:00 am? did she have an attack? did something happen to the apartment?’

he snatched the phone, pressing it to his ear before the second ring could even finish. "y/n?! y/n, love, what’s wrong? are you okay? is ness there?"

he was met with a ragged, completely shattered sob that sounded so raw it physically pained him through the speaker.

"hoon..." y/n wept, her voice cracking into tiny, breathless pieces as she clutched his letter against her ribs. "hoon, i love you. i love you so much. i’m so sorry. i’m so, so sorry, baby."

sunghoon sat up abruptly, swinging his long legs over the edge of the hotel bed, his brow furrowing in deep, desperate confusion. "hey, hey, sweetie, breathe for me. why are you apologizing? did something happen? let me call ness—"

"no, don't call anyone! just... please, hoon, let me speak," y/n pleaded, a sharp, hiccups-laden gasp escaping her as she forced the words out. she gripped the phone tighter, her knuckles turning white as she leaned her head against her knees, letting the ugly, unfiltered truth pour out of her. "please just listen to me, i need to say this."

sunghoon went entirely still, holding his breath in the dark room, his heart hammering against his ribs. "okay. i'm listening, baby. go ahead."

"i read the letter," y/n sobbed, the tears pouring down her cheeks, hot and unyielding. "and it completely destroyed me, hoon. because for the last seven days, i have been a toxic, stubborn monster to you. i kept spiraling completely inside my own head. my thoughts... they were poisoning my entire system, hoon. every single hour, i was looking at the comments, looking at the photos from the convention, watching all these beautiful, perfect girls thirsting over you on twitter and i let it completely consume me."

she took a ragged, trembling breath, her voice dropping into a small, agonizingly vulnerable whisper that broke sunghoon’s heart into pieces. "i convinced myself that i was just a miserable, short-tempered burden to your life. i thought you were going to realise how exhausting i am compared to them, and that you’d eventually find a reason to leave me. so i punished you. i ignored you completely, i wouldn't look at you before you left, and i left you on read when you were just trying to love me from miles away. i am so sorry, hoon. i'm so sorry for being so difficult."

"y/n, love, listen to me," sunghoon rushed out, his deep voice thick with an intense, overwhelming emotion, his own eyes burning in the dark. "you don't have to apologise for being scared. i told you in the letter—"

"no, i do," y/n intercepted fiercely, her tone returning to a ghost of its usual commanding strength, though it was still heavy with tears. "i do, because you are working yourself to the bone and i was throwing a tantrum. but i am done hiding from you, hoon. i love you more than anything and i swear to you, the second you get back, i am going to try so hard to change. i’m going to fight my own head. i’m going to push away the jealousy, ignore the internet and just focus entirely on loving you the way you deserve to be loved."

she paused, swallowing the lingering lump in her throat, her eyes catching the specific sentence in his letter about their endgame. a sudden, fierce, and beautiful certainty washed over her entire being.

"and hoon?" she whispered, a soft, tearful but incredibly steady smile finally breaking through her damp features. "i read what you said about the ring. and i need you to know... i am going to marry you. i’m going to marry you, sunghoon and i don't care how many fights we have to bicker through, i am never letting you go."

across the state, sunghoon closed his eyes, a large, breathless, and completely overwhelmed laugh escaping his lips as a tear finally slipped down his own cheek. the crushing weight he had been carrying all week instantly evaporated into thin air, replaced by a profound, radiant warmth.

"you really know how to take charge, don't you, baby?" sunghoon rasped out, his voice shaking with pure, unadulterated happiness as he leaned his head back against the wall, a brilliant smile lighting up his face in the dark. "boasting about marrying me at five in the morning... god, i love you so much, y/n. you have no idea how long i've waited for you to come back to me."

the terminal at the arrivals gate was buzzing with the chaotic energy of a sunday afternoon, but for the three people waiting near the security barrier, the entire world had shrunk down to a single digital flight board.

ness was practically jumping in place, her sneakers squeaking rhythmically against the polished airport tile. she was wearing one of jake’s baseball caps, her hands gripping her phone so tightly her knuckles were white. her eyes were glued to the automatic sliding glass doors of the restricted arrivals area, her foot tapping a mile a minute.

beside her, jungwon stood with his hands casually slipped into the pockets of his trench coat but the cool facade was entirely betrayed by the massive, dimpled grin that was splitting his face. he kept shifting his weight, his sharp cat eyes scanning every single traveler who walked through the threshold.

y/n, however, felt like she was trapped in an absolute vacuum.

her heart hammered so violently against her ribs she was convinced the entire terminal could hear it. her palms were cold, sweating slightly and a weird, suffocating wave of nervous nausea was rolling through her stomach.

this was going to be the very first time she would see sunghoon face-to-face since their explosive argument, since she had frozen him out in the dark. the reality of everything that had transpired before he left was crashing over her all at once.

"oh my gosh, oh my gosh, the light just turned green! the flight status says baggage claimed!" ness gasped, tugging violently on jungwon’s sleeve.

"ness, breathe, you're going to tear my coat," jungwon chuckled, though his own eyes moved around as the automatic glass doors slid open for a large influx of passengers.

and then, right through the crowd, the four of them appeared.

they looked exhausted, carrying their heavy duffel bags and wheeling their suitcases, but the moment they cleared the barrier, their eyes scanned the waiting crowd.

ness reacted first. she didn't care about public decorum, the airport traffic, or the baggage carts in her way. the second her eyes locked onto the black cap and broad shoulders of her boyfriend and she let out a sharp, breathless cry.

"jakey!"

she bolted past the security barrier, her feet flying across the tile. jake’s head whipped around at the sound of his name, and the moment he saw his girl running toward him, his entire face lit up with a brilliant, dazzling smile. he dropped the handle of his suitcase completely, opening his arms wide just in time for ness to launch her entire body off the ground and wrap her legs securely around his waist.

a few feet away, jay didn't waste a single second either. he didn't say a word, his jaw set in a determined line as he marched straight past jake and ness, his eyes locked entirely on jungwon. jungwon took a single step forward before jay closed the distance, dropping his duffel bag to the floor and throwing his arms fiercely around his boyfriend’s shoulders.

but in the center of the terminal static, sunghoon just stood perfectly still.

he had stopped about ten feet back, his hand resting loosely on the handle of his suitcase. his dark, piercing eyes were fixed entirely on y/n, completely tuning out the chaotic reunions happening around him.

y/n stared back at him, her breath catching completely in her throat. seeing him standing there in his grey tracksuit, his pale skin and his towering, elegant frame looking so impossibly real and within arm's reach—it was too much for her fragile system to handle. the unyielding, fiercely loyal love she had read on those pages textually was standing right in front of her.

a single, heavy tear spilled over y/n's eyelashes, followed instantly by a torrent of hot, silent weeping.

the second sunghoon saw her shoulders tremble and the tears break free across her face, his stoic mask completely shattered.

"y/n," he choked out.

he didn't walk; he rushed. sunghoon abandoned his suitcase entirely, his long strides covering the distance between them in a fraction of a second. before y/n could even take a step forward, sunghoon slammed into her frame, his long, powerful arms reaching out to scoop her up and drag her body violently flush against his broad chest.

the impact knocked the breath out of her, but y/n didn't care. she buried her face directly into the crook of his neck, her hands flying up to clutch at the fabric of his hoodie with a desperate, white-knuckled grip and she completely broke down. she sobbed loudly, a raw, ragged sound of pure, overwhelming relief and devotion bleeding right into his ear.

"finally," sunghoon shuddered against her hair, his own eyes burning with hot tears as he squeezed her so tightly her ribs practically crushed against his chest. he buried his face in her hair, his large hand cupping the back of her head, pressing her into his skin as if he wanted to fuse their bodies together. "i missed you so much, y/n."

"i'm sorry... i'm so sorry, hoon," she wept into his neck, her body shaking violently in his embrace.

"hey, look at me. none of that anymore, remember?" sunghoon murmured, pulling back just enough to look down into her tear-streaked face. his thumbs were incredibly tender as he wiped the moisture from her cheeks, his dark eyes consumption-warm. "we are entirely good, my mrs. park. i love you."

y/n let out a watery, breathless laugh through her tears, nodding her head as she clung to his neck again. "i love you too."

while the three couples were trapped in their own cinematic worlds of hugging, crying and whispering lovey-dovey vows, heeseung was left standing completely alone in the center of the walkway. he was holding his own duffel bag, staring at the three pairs of lovebirds with a completely deadpan, unbothered and highly amused expression on his face.

he let out a loud, theatrical sigh, shifting his bag to his other shoulder as he looked around at them.

"wow. truly beautiful. i feel so seen right now," heeseung called out, his tired voice dripping with a dry, sarcastic humor that cut right through the romantic tension of the terminal. "i mean, i also survived a five-day corporate meat grinder, carried the team through three separate Q&A panels and practically raised these boys, but please, continue to ignore the eldest. it’s totally fine. i love being the seventh wheel."

the group collectively broke away from their hugs, a chorus of loud, bright laughter echoing through the arrivals gate.

"oh, come here, you big baby!" ness giggled, pulling away from jake and jogging over to him.

before heeseung could even drop his bag, the trio executed a coordinated strike. ness, y/n (still wiping her eyes) and jungwon all stepped forward at the exact same time, throwing their arms completely around heeseung in a massive, chaotic group hug.

"welcome back, hyung," jungwon laughed, burying his face in heeseung’s shoulder.

"yeah, yeah, welcome back, old man," y/n teased, her voice returning to its usual fierce, sarcastic cadence as she squeezed his side.

heeseung let out a dramatic, wheezing gasp, though a massive, triumphant grin broke across his face as he wrapped his long arms around all three of them, patting their backs roughly. "ah, okay, okay, too much love! i retract my statement! GET AWAAYYYYY!"

the boys just laughed, stepping forward to gather their bags and slide back into their respective pairs. the air was warm, the tension was entirely gone and as sunghoon wrapped his arm around y/n’s waist, pulling her side flush against his as they walked toward the exit, they all knew the storm had officially passed.