Welcome to the new age

to all the books i’ve read in 2019: Kings Rising by C.S. Pacat

Denying yourself food

Denying yourself sleep

Denying yourself going to the bathroom, basic hygene and other forms of self-maintainence.

Intentionally not going to the doctor/dentist/psychiatrist when you’re not well. 

Intentionally Exposing yourself to media that wil trigger yourself or otherwise aggravate your mental health issues.  This includes: Hate-following people, reading articles you know will piss you off, exposing yourself to the news more than is safe for you to ‘stay aware’, watching TV shows that are too violent for you, and starting fights on the internet.

Picking at your skin/re-opeinging cuts/pulling your hair out/over-grooming: this is basically cutting without the blade.

Intentionally Eating foods you know will make you ill: eating foods your’e allergic too, drinking milk when lactose intolerant, etc.

Substance abuse like excessive drinking or drug abuse

Intentionally taking excessively risky behaviors, justin in case an ‘accident’ happens: driving while tried, going out during thunderstorms, jaywalking on busy roads.

Intentionally spending time with/emotional effort on people who are not good for you: Going back to/not breaking up with someone who doesn’t treat you right, spending time with abusive family, following people you hate on social media etc.

Talking down about yourself: “Im such a fuck-up” “I don’t deserve to be alive” “I should just kill myself” etc.

Basically- If it’d be a form of violence if someone else did this to you, it’s self-harm when you do it to yourself.

- Damen upon discovering Torveld is in love with Laurent: “oh wow I had no idea Torveld had a thing for reptiles”

- Ancel coming out on stage to perform holding a stick and Damen immediately assuming he’s about to shove it in his own ass

- “Your uncle asked me to spy on you by taking you to bed” “did you agree?” “If I bedded you, you’d know it.”

- “I wouldn’t make you do anything distasteful, Nicaise” “looking at you is distasteful”

- “Maybe I’d like you if you were not a foot taller” “It’s considerably less than a foot.” “Feels like more when you argue with me on points of honour”

- Laurent asking Damen how to knock on the door of a brothel: “this is your arena after all”

- “It’s not my fault nobody in your country can think in a straight line”

- “I can’t get to Laurent in time to save him from his attacker!” *grabs sword* “YEET.”

- Aimeric continuously being a cockblock

- Laurent, about to go off on Guion: “Damen is 100% of my impulse control, unfortunately for you he isn’t here right now”

- *laurent is given a pleasure slave who’s pumped to get it on with him* Damen: “You realize he’s gonna make you sit around in his room and do jackshit.”

- “You might have killed Damen!” “That’s the idea.”

- “Who do you want to guard Jokaste’s prison cell?” “Find the two gayest men here and make them do it.”

Me: Hey there buddy

New Ship: *Punches fist through chest and grabs heart*

☆ A kingdom, and this  ☆

Don’t know if anyone has translated this yet, but here I gave it a shot. This interview is bittersweet but sweet enough so I can smile about it at the end.

[preview of the interview from 0:00 - 1:00]

Sho: Is there any difference between the landscape at Sochi Olympics and at the Olympics this time where you defended your title?

Yuzu: Definitely, things like the weight of my emotion, and also the thoughts that I had, I think those things were totally different. After all, four years ago, I tried my best recklessly and it somehow felt like “I was able to take to good medal!”, something that I can be sincerely happy about. This time, I had a very strong feeling that “I’ll definitely get that gold medal!”, I had the pressure that I must get the gold. It really was a gold medal that filled my heart with many kinds of emotions.

Sho: Since you were small, I think you specifically said that it was your dream or your goal, your plan to get a gold medal, and then you got the gold medal at 19 years old, and again at 23 years old, did you have some kind of plan like this?

Yuzu: Of course I did have a plan like that. It was a plan I had when I was small, but I want to say to my child self that “One’s life cannot go so well that simply.” Still, I’m really satisfied that I got good results like this.