World’s Most Annoying Woman

this post is inspired in part by this one by @cheshirepirouette and sponsored in part by convos w @asteriis and @indouscurse here’s to y’all!! this post also goes out to my brothers, who are pale as hell for reasons unbeknownst to all of us (this is a joke).

like any good headcanon, this started as a joke because i thought to myself: Ryland sounds like the type of name that somebody’s Black child would have and only use on church sundays. nobody actually has ever called him that in his whole entire life, except maybe his mama SOMETIMES and that’s why he doesn’t remember it right away. i feel like every Black person knows somebody who is called literally anything except their god given name. people call him lil r, lil grace, gracie, ry, ryry, riri, RG, lando, mr. grace, dr. grace, but nobody calls him Ryland, which is part of why he Can’t Remember for so long.

so of course i went back to the source material to see if he ever actually mentioned being white anywhere and unfortunately it is very much at the beginning of the book. so THEN i started to think about how i could get around that while remaining at least largely canon compliant (as a little treat for myself). what i came up with is what i have affectionately dubbed my “litebrite baby” headcanon.

CAPTAIN!!!! HIT HIM WITH THE MELANIN BEAM!!!!!!!

The beloved middle school teacher that goes above and beyond in teaching his students, and his students reciprocate his love in turn.

He's dorky, awkward, can't make it two steps without stumbling over something. So earnest about everything he does and considers, but still finds this divide between himself and others that he doesn't know how to cross.

Him being signed on to the project, with them making it just as clear that he's expendable. They want him for his knowledge and will take as much from him as they can, up to and including his own life.

"For the good of humanity". Grace, who declines the opportunity to go into space because he may be socially isolated, but he still wants to live.

And is then forced to go anyway. A one-way trip orchestrated by someone he thought was his friend, who betrayed him- who is willingly sending him off to his death.

Like, this one change and suddenly we're talking about medical racism and the ownership of Black bodies and how they're used and discarded afterwards.