Why say "you sound horrible* when you could instead say this
# Running in the Family, Michael Ondaatje
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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

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@ittibittititti
Why say "you sound horrible* when you could instead say this
# Running in the Family, Michael Ondaatje

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actually annoyed by long distance friends again. i want to go for a walk i want to get drinks i want to sit in the grass and write i want to go to the fucking store together
almost everything men say they love about their culture is actually reliant on the labour of women. that’s why it’s so easy for them to feel proud and protective over it. taking care of elders and not putting them in care homes? the care is always done almost exclusively by female family members. the yummy traditional food? cooked by women. the fun events and gatherings? organised and hosted by the women. men love taking credit for their culture but in reality they barely participate in the actual hard work, they just get to sit back and enjoy all the benefits of it. it’s a scam 🤷🏻♀️
// June nights, 2026
actually annoyed by long distance friends again. i want to go for a walk i want to get drinks i want to sit in the grass and write i want to go to the fucking store together

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June 2026:
I remembered something Townshend said during our surprisingly wide-ranging and philosophical chat. “The present is not as important as it’s pumped up to be,” Townshend told me. “What’s important is our helicopter shot of our own existence.” - How Far Will a Reader Go to Hear Songs Inspired by Books? , Elisabeth Egan, August 2024
That Carrie post reminded me of my biggest and oldest pet peeve: adaptations taking a character who's supposed to be ugly, or at least not beautiful, and casting someone perfect-looking. A lot of the time this is simple misogyny, but the inability to allow ugly people to exist also extends to men and boys, and I remember how pissed I was when I started understanding this at around the age of eight.
Bastian of the Neverending Story is fat and weird-looking, in the movie he's a perfectly photogenic all-American kid.
Hermione is buck-toothed and unpretty, in the movies she's a perfect little girl who grows into a very attractive woman.
Carrie is fat and unpretty, in the movies she's a supermodel in slightly unflattering clothes.
Don't even talk to me about Ugly Betty.
The latest Frankenstein adaptation continues a long trend of trying to convey the message of "this monster is not inherently evil" by making the monster look good. Because obviously if the monster did look bad, it would be evil and people would be justified in shunning it.
Even supposedly more serious media does it. Imre Kertész's Holocaust novel Fateless has a minor character, a wimpy weird-looking member of the group of boys who got deported together. The other boys don't really like him, and disdainfully agree when he's deemed not fit for work - of course they don't yet know that it's a death sentence. In the atrocious movie he's not weaker just younger, a photogenic little boy, and him being sent to his death is played as a sentimental tearjerker for the audience instead of forcing us to grapple with the complexity of the original, where mundane teen boy cruelty continues to exist in boys who are currently victims of a genocide.
A written text says: this person is ugly, this affects how people treat them, this affects how they feel about themselves, how they behave, how they live in the world. This might just be an incidental part of their story, or it might be its entire point of the whole fucking book. And then the movie sweeps in and says: oh, but they aren't ugly! They have always been beautiful! They are being bullied and shunned for no reason! So unfair!
And the unintentional but very obvious implication arises that if they *were* ugly, of course they would deserve the bullying, the audience would agree that they deserve the bullying, the audience would want to join in, kick spit point laugh. The idea of empathizing with an actually ugly person doesn't compute. (Maybe it's clear by now that this has done low-grade but long-lasting damage to me as a person: weird ugly people are simply not allowed to exist, not even in stories about being weird and ugly.)
Btw this is why "everyone is beautiful" type body-positivity does nothing for me, and why I'm hyper-sensitive to how people discuss ugliness in reality and in fiction. For example, I love the Just King Things and the Shelved by Genre podcasts, but I think they struggle to see the value of written descriptions of ugliness. They interpret Steven King's descriptions of Carrie as cruel, they interpret Tiptree's description of P. Burke in The Girl who was Plugged In as cruel and fatphobic. Sure, I don't want to give King kudos for all his depictions of women, but he did get it right that time, and Tiptree absolutely did. Describing a character, especially a woman as ugly, genuinely ugly, no not secretly beautiful, actually ugly, and then telling her story, a story about existing in the world as an ugly woman, is really really fucking important. And people keep shying away from it, oh, it's cruel to call anyone ugly, let's pretend that ugly people don't exist instead.
Ode to Mitski by William Fargason
🎶Glass, concrete and stone - David Byrne
January 2026
Lisa Feldman Barrett, How Emotions Are Made

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Blues in the city, Part 1
Trips in 2025
Sweet Honesty, Vintage Deer Perfume Bottle by Avon
August 2025. Art in the City.
Rami Kadi Spring 2023

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// New Cathay Restaurant and Bar, Broadway Hotel, New Empire Restaurant and Bar, Moulin Rouge, and Elgin Fairlawn.
Collages, 2025