Paramount's absolute dog shit marketing is astounding. Multiple times now I have seen diehard fans say they had no idea there was a movie in the works, let alone being released this year until the leak. How is Avatar the Last Airbender, the show so widely and consistently acclaimed to be the best show of its generation as to be a set in stone fact, with the literal most iconic heel-face turn arc in television history, also the most consistently bungled by it's distributors???? Are they allergic to money???

Forget pin/pen merger – the real dividing line for English accents is whether "Solomon Grundy / Born on a Monday" actually rhymes.

Old Gods of Appalachia : women can do anything! Learn the deepest most terrible secrets of the Dark and stay in the light of the Green (good), open a brothel, have many kids, be asexual, become a lawyer, become a school mistress, learn the deepest most terrible secrets of the Dark and somehow stay in the Green (bad?), get drunk on irish coffee at 10am during a gossip session and miss a funeral at age 70, be a lesbian, bring down a river dam with your bare hands above a village of unionizing coal miners on Christmas night, eat your husband at your wedding ceremony (bad), scream on the top of your lungs and make it sound like the enraged bellow of a forgotten beast, be covered in blood from head to toe while butt naked, cut up your husband in twelve pieces and bury him under the smoke house (good), make sex jokes at 72 years of age and giggle about it, fall to the horrors but you tried oh how hard you tried, shoot a bitch, become a librarian, wear a bitching suit, be a blood crazed wolf mad on grief and pain, have a good time being a wolf playing music with your buddies, use your charms to get people to do what you want, have an army of cockroaches, start a cult, yell at ghosts who forgot their manners, beat up eldritch gods, beat up eldritch gods, beat up eldritch gods, eat people, eat people, eat people, eat people, eat people