Untitled

A rare emotion bubbles within you: defiance.

“N-no!! Don’twanna nap!”

You wield it clumsily, like a technical skill you haven’t used in years.

Because you haven’t.

Turning away from Mommy, you see the room that you once believed was the culmination of every fantasy you ever had.

Now it mocks you as a monument to the monotony of your life as her baby.

Dreadful silence blankets the room. Every second weakening your resolve as you wonder what she will do. Mommy never tolerates disobedience.

Will she spank you? Will she tell Daddy?  Will you spend the next 20 minutes in the corner with a bar of soap in your mouth?

You take a deep, steadying breath. It doesn’t matter what the punishment is. You’re sick of being a baby.

“I…I won’t!”

Mommy sighs.

“Jason, look at me.”

Whatever reaction you expected, this was not it. She hasn’t used your name or addressed you like an adult in well over a year.

Maybe she understands!

You stare into your eyes, searching for some hope.

“What’s gotten into you?”

Her question seems genuine. Inviting. This is your chance to tell her everything.

That you’re tired of living life as her baby, without any say in what happens in your life. Tired of the mind numbing baby shows and Fischer Price toys that turn your brain to mush.

That you’re tired of everyone in your life dismissing you like you’re some silly toddler, unworthy of respect or dignity. Tired of early bedtimes, daily naps, and boring, unspiced food.

That you’re tired of wearing diapers and having them changed whenever and wherever she decides. Tired of Winnie the Pooh overalls with snaps at the crotch, Bluey diaper shirts, and pastel onesies.

That you’re tired of diapers being the only place you’re allowed to cum—if Mommy gives you permission. Tired of listening to your best friend fuck your wife while you sleep in a crib.

It’s not cute anymore. You want to be an adult again.

“I want my old life back. No more baby stuff. I’m an adult—time you remember that.”

Mommy laughs.

“Oh, honey…no.”

The simple denial, unburdened by any explanation, feels like a slap in the face.

“What do you mean, no?”

“I mean, no. Nothing will change for you.”

“Yes, it will! You can’t force me to be your baby!”

“You’re right.”

“So, you’ll stop treating me like a baby?”

“No.”

“Then…then I’ll leave!”

“The doors right there, baby.”

For a split second, you think about your freedom—until the reality hits.

Mommy smiles knowingly as you work through the situation.

You have no adult clothes. No cell phone. No money. No car. No driver’s license. Nothing but a stack of diapers and a closet full of onesies.

“Need help packing a bag?”

Her voice oozes with the same infantile cadence you hate. No different from how a parent would entertain a toddler threatening to run away.

“Mommy gave you everything you wanted, hun. You wanted ‘the real thing,’ remember? Not role-play, not a dynamic—no, you wanted authenticity.”

She pokes your diaper.

“Well, you got it! Why do you think I insisted that you give up your law license? Or close your bank accounts and credit cards? Let your driver’s license expire? Hmm?”

She tickles your tummy.

“See, being a baby isn’t just about poofy diapies, colorful pacifiers, and adorable onesies, kiddo. Nope! Real babyhood requires utter dependence on Mommy for your every need! Babies can’t survive without their mommies—and neither can you!”

The full weight of her words crashes down on you.

“You have no money, no job, no place to go. But, sure, if you want to leave, Mommy will put you in a fresh diaper and new onesie, pack you a diaper bag, and wish you luck.”

Her smile throws you off balance.

“I’ll…I’ll call m-my…my friends…”

More laughter.

“Sweetie, everyone knows you’re a baby. Who is going to volunteer to babysit you? You can’t pay rent, can’t help with groceries, and need someone to change your diapers. Nobody is letting you stay with them.”

“I don’t need diapers!”

“You’re incorrigible, kiddo. Your diaper is leaking, by the way. Did you know?”

“I…”

“Face it, sweetheart. There is no going back. Mommy made sure of that. You’re so far from adulthood that I claim you as a dependent on my taxes. Besides, what law firm is desperate enough to hire someone with a 3-year gap in employment? Your resume will be written in crayon…”

She giggles at the ridiculousness.

“Even if you did leave, you’re not leaving behind diapers. You understand you’re not potty trained, right? And, honey, do you remember your last stiffie?”

Her silence demands an answer.

“I-I-I-I…dunno…”

She pinches your cheek.

“Aww! That’s because I took them just like your potty training! Even if I played with it, begging you to get hard for Mommy…nothing would happen. No more stiffies…ever!”

Your heart sinks into your stomach.

“Last question, baby boy. What woman wants an unemployed, impotent man-child who isn’t even potty trained?”

You shrug, defeated.

“Oh, sweetie, don’t be sad! Mommy wants that, silly! Me! I worked hard to make all your dreams come true! And mine.”

“B-but you said you w-weren’t into being a…a mommy…”

“I wasn’t…at first. But now? Fuck it turned me on stripping you of every shred of masculinity and adulthood. Breaking you down into my helpless, docile plaything. You’re my itty bitty Play-Doh, waiting to be molded by my hands.”

“Th-that’s…y-you’re lying!”

“No, baby. You’re going to spend the rest of your life as my baby—all because it turns me on. You could never dream of doing that as my husband. Ugh, I’m dripping just thinking about it.”

She bites her lip, sensing your surrender.

“Now. Tell me you’re Mommy’s baby. My good boy…”

Your cheeks burn with humiliation of the truth.

“I…m’your…Mommy’s b-baby…and…and good b-boy.”

Mommy winces in pleasure.

“That’s right! Are you a big boy?”

“N-no, Mommy.”

“Mmmm,” she moans, “Tell Mommy why...”

“C-cause…I-I…’mnot potty trained a-and c-can’t g-get a…a…umm…”

“Say it, little one.”

“Getta…s-stiffie, Mommy.”

“Ahh! Will you ever, ever have sex again?”

You shudder in shame. “N-no, Mommy..”

“Mhm! You’re Mommy’s perpetually pampered, eternally mushy baby boy!”

You nod, defeated and broken.

“Now, naptime. Mommy needs to play with Daddy…”

You start grabbing your blocks.

“No. Crib. You can clean after.”

Mommy’s cheeks are flushed with anticipation as she hastily tucks you in.

“Be a good boy and listen to how happy your rightful place makes Mommy.”

You barely have time to register what the rest of your life was going to be before Mommy is screaming Daddy’s name. Your useless nub twitches but remains as steadfastly squishy as your diaper.

This is how you’ll spend the rest of your life.

Utterly and completely dependent on the woman who stole your adulthood, emasculated you, and relegated you to a lifetime of pampers.