Bagging a Legend: A Beginnerâs Guide
Step 1: Show up looking pretty. Step 2: Literally nothing else because the seven world time champion named Lewis, will handle the rest
You stare at the message.
Then again, it's as if your soul exits your body.
Your bestie, who has absolutely zero sense of boundaries, is leaning over your shoulder like a hawk waiting for prey.
âWHAT. DID. HE. SAY.â
But your bestie sees the screen anyway because sheâs nosy and, frankly, built like a velociraptor.
âONLY WHEN SOMEONE REFUSES TO TEXT ME BACK?????? NAH. NAH. NAH. HEâS FLIRTING. WITH YOU???â She grabs your arm, shaking you like a maraca.
She then still shaking you âGIRL TEXT HIM BACK BEFORE I DO IT FOR YOU!!!â
Youâre frozen, phone in hand, legs numb, lungs malfunctioning like youâve forgotten how oxygen works.
âI CANâT TEXT HIM BACK, IâLL TYPE SOMETHING STUPID.â
âYOU ALREADY DID THAT ON TWITTER, YOU HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO LOSE.â
She shoves the phone back into your hand, eyes wide, feral, determined. âText. Him. NOW...Before he thinks you died again.â
âOH MY GOD BESTIE OK OKâ
Tomorrow night arrived and your hotel bedroom looks like a department store exploded.
Clothes are everywhere, on bed, floors, hanging from chair backs, one tragic heel lying in the hallway like it tried to escape the chaos. Your bestie is on the floor cross-legged, holding a lint roller like a weapon and judging everything.
You are standing in front of the mirror in your robe, hair half-done, mascara smudged from stress.
âOkay. Breathe. Itâs just a date.â dramatic pause âWith lewis hamilton...â she added
You, dramatized too âIâM...IâM GONNA THROW UP.â
Bestie slams the lint roller onto the bed like a gavel. âNot tonight, youâre not. Go on, continueâ
You rolled your eyes but you hold up a dress
âNo. Too obvious that you're trying. We want I woke up like this vibesâ
âArgh, this?â You hold up a top and jeans.
âOkay⌠but what if the lighting is bad and you end up looking like a distressed French film student?â
You hold up literally nothing, because your brain has left your body.
âAlright, let me curate. Sit down. Donât move. Donât think. You thinking makes things worse.
Your bestie dives into your closet like a soldier entering a war zone.
Finally, miraculously, something emerges:
A soft, elegant-but-effortlessly-chic top that makes your collarbones look like they were sculpted by angels, paired with perfect-fit trousers that make your legs look ten miles long, and a jacket that gives subtle expensive-but-not-trying vibes.
âTHIS. THIS IS THE ONE. It's like saying you are confident, a mysterious vibes!â
You trusted her and put it on.
Bestie gasps âOh my god. Lewis is going to malfunction. You're so fucking prettyâ
You stare at yourself. Like⌠dangerously good.
Suddenly your stomach drops. âWhat if I trip?â
Your bestie laughed âYou will trip. But you will look hot doing it. Okay next nextâ
Your bestie sits you down like youâre a child getting ready for school picture day. âTilt your head. No. The other left. Girl! stay still.â
Every five seconds, you jerk because you remember âHE ASKED ME OUT?? LIKE. ME??? WHY??â
âStop moving your eyebrows or I swear to god, y/n!â
But still, in the makeup turns out perfect.
Glossy, glowing, soft, your hair is good too
Your phone vibrated, Lewis messaged you on twitter that he'll be arriving within 10 minutes, at this point youâre pacing. Your estie is spraying perfume on you like sheâs baptizing you.
âOKAY! SHOOT YOUR SHOT OKAY? DON'T FUCKING FUMBLE THIS ONE, HE'S LEWIS!!â your bestied reminded you
Moments later, yoh went down the hotel and in front of the hotel is Lewis' car, he's leaning on his car, using his cellphone but he noticed you too quickly, and he smiled.
âYou look⌠incredible.â he said, looking at you, staring at your beauty
You went near, âthank you... you tooâ
He smiled, once again. He offers his hand and you take it.
Lewis opens the passenger door for you, like a gentleman from a romance movie, and you try very hard to get in gracefully.
You accidentally bonk your head a little on the roof.
âCareful.â soft chuckle, extremely fond already
You want to evaporate. Already screaming internally. He walks around to the driverâs side and gets in. The interior smells like expensive leather and the faintest hint of his cologne, warm, clean, borderline illegal.
He starts the car, and the engine purrs softly.
You pretend youâre fine and of course youâre not. Same car with lewis hamilton? who would even be calm? for sure it's not you.
Lewis started driving, comfortable and chill while you actively fight for your life.
And you don't even know what went into you, because you decide to break the silence.
And thatâs your first mistake, regret it already.
âSo⌠um⌠do you...drive often?â
Lewis blinks, a very slowly blinks âDo I⌠drive often?â
You realize...you realized so hard.
âOH MY GOD WAIT...YOU...YOUâRE A DRIVER. LIKE⌠YOU DRIVE FOR A LIVING. IâM SO SORRY...please pretend i never spoke.â
Lewis bites his lip trying not to laugh but failed. He laughs, warm and your entire soul leaves your body. âItâs okay. For the record, yes. I do driveâŚnot an f1 car...sometimes.â
You cover your face, clearing your throat, desperate to sound normal.
âUhh⌠I see...nice car.â
Lewis glances at the dashboard, then back at you. âThank you.â he paused then continued âI hope thatâs not because you think I donât get to drive nice ones very often.â
You choke. âNO I... I just meant... This is- Itâs a car...which is nice. Because of the⌠wheels?â
Lewis stops at a red light and just looks at you. Smiling still and shaking his head a little.
Your brain malfunctioned. âanyways! So! Um. Dinner. Do you...are you planning to⌠eat?â
Lewis presses his lips together. âI was thinking about it, yes.â
You groan dramatically, melting into the seat. âPlease. PLEASE stop letting me talk.â
Lewis looks over at you, eyes warm, soft, sparkling like it speaks.
âNo. I like hearing you talk.â
Your heart does a full gymnastics routine after he said it
Lewis decided to turn on the radio to save you from self-destruction.
A chill R&B song plays and you nod along, pretending youâre sophisticated.
âOh, I love this! I...uh I donât know the words, but I love the⌠vibes.â
Lewis glances over then bacn at road
You pretend to look out the window so he doesnât see your entire face burning. âSo, where are we going?â you asked, still looking at the window
Lewis smiles like heâs been waiting for that. âSomewhere quiet. Good food. Good view.â
You freeze at your own words... and Lewis too. It was a coincidence. Red light, he stopped the car and automatically you both look at each other.
Lewis raises one eyebrow, amused and smooth as hell. âDo you want it to be?â
Your soul ascends to a higher plane. âI...I- pshh...no...yes...no! I didnât...whatever! I donât even know English...â
Lewis is full-on laughing now, hand over his mouth. He looks at you like he already knows this night is going to be unforgettable.
âRelax. Iâm joking...maybe?â
It finally became a quiet ride.
You arrived, Lewis parks the car in front of an impossibly elegant, softly lit restaurant, the kind with valet, candles, and menus that donât show prices.
He steps out, walks around, and opens your door again
Once again, you try to step out gracefully, and you failed...again.
Lewis, chuckles âEasy.â
He offers his hand and you accept feeling that electricity, immediately
You pretend you didnât feel it but you definitely did
As you and lewis stepped inside, the hostess doesnât even ask for a name.
âGood evening, Mr. Hamilton. Your table is ready.â
You choke a little and Lewis pretends not to notice.
He pull the chair for you to sit and after, he sat down too. Lewis watches you carefully.
He thinks youâre clueless, not really clueless. Well, you went to the race, you probably has money but either way maybe you need help, a guide with this kind of things. Which he is incorrect.
You sit like someone raised in expensive air-conditioning.
You lift the smallest fork instinctively, wrist delicate, posture perfect, flawless dining etiquette.
Lewis blinks. ââŚyou know your way around a table setting.â
Deadpan, you answered, a bit shy âI hate to say it but..I grew up in a household where...uhm...water had a you know...tasting menu.â
He laughs, shocked but delighted.
The waiter gave the menu to both of you and Lewis picks from his menu, focused of what to eat.
You study yours like you already know exactly what youâre ordering. âThe risotto is divine. But only if they use...from AbruzzoâŚthey have two suppliers.â
Lewis stares hard ââŚhow do you know that?â
âHow do you not know that?â You answered instinctly
Lewis puts his menu down. Heâs visibly flustered Itâs adorable. âI'm vegetarianâ
You blushed âoh.. uh... I didn't mean anything... bad.. I-â
âI know. I like it, adorableâ he said, smiling.
The server returns to take orders, you order flawlessly, pronounced perfectly, like a Sommelierâs favorite nightmare.
Lewis orders too, still watching you like youâre a plot twist.
Then as everything is perfect for you, of course you ruin it in the most you way possible way
The sommelier arrived and sommelier pours a tasting.
Your hand instinctly, naturally moves, you swirl it like a pro, sniffs it like a pro and takes a sip it like youâre reviewing art. âHmm. Tastes like⌠money.â
Lewis chokes on air. âThatâs⌠one way to describe it.â
You nod seriously. âOld money.â
He coughs-laughs and stares at you, adoring you.
After the wine tasting, the sommelier left and you and lewis starts to eat.
âAre you nervous?â he asked mid-eating
âNo. Iâm just sweating because romantic lighting stresses me out.â
âThis isnât romantic lighting.â
You gesture at the candles.
âPlease. This is people fall in love over dinner lighting.â
Lewis goes quiet, softly smiling but a little red. He looks down at his veggie plate for a second.
Heâs in trouble and he knows it.
âYou look beautiful tonight.â he suddenly mumbles
You, trying to be normal responded âThank you. You look⌠like someone who doesn't get old.â
Lewis stops and stares at you. Then bursts out laughing, warm, real, belly-laughter. His usual "hehehe" laugh on televisions âThat might be the strangest compliment Iâve ever received.â
âIt was sincere. Your skin is giving rich hydration.â
He shakes his head, smiling into his wine glass.
As the dinner goes on, you slowly calms down a bit, yoy got to talk about life, travel, childhood, your bestie, your chaotic entrance into F1 fandomâŚ
And Lewis keeps staring in this soft, fascinated way as if heâs studying art.
âIs that good?â you asked
âItâs⌠dangerous.â You stopped but he doesnât because he holds eye contact.
He leans back, studying you like heâs memorizing your face.
Then ge leans in slightly. âThereâs something I want to sayâŚâ
Your heart instantly gives up.
âBut Iâm worried youâll faint.â he added âNo, actually itâs fine. Forget itâ
â...okayâ you simply stated
He leans slightly closer, not too much, just enough for you to smell his cologne and lose half your brain cells. âTo tell you the truth, youâre the most interesting person Iâve met in a long time.â
ââŚlike⌠interesting as in circus animal?â
Lewis actually has to close his eyes for a second. âNo, y/n.â soft laugh âInteresting as in⌠I want to know more about you.â
Your heart wants to explodes, respawns, explodes again.
You try to speak but you sound like a broken record âIâŚokayâŚIâŚwow, hold onâŚmy face is hot I think I need CPR wait no donât do thatâŚunlessâ
Lewis bursts into warm laughter, shaking his head. âYouâre something else.â
He took a last sip from his cup and glances toward the windows where the night is soft and quiet.
âDo you⌠want to take a walk? Just outside. The view is nice. Looks like youâre done anywayâ
And you nod way too fast. âYES!. I meanâŚyes. Casual. I walk. I am a walking person.â
He stands, offers you his hand and you take it.
You immediately forget how legs work but he pretends not to notice.
You two went out, the breeze is cold but not that cold, the street is soft-lit, quiet, cars distant. You walk side by side.
Your hands are intertwined and each time he smile, you lose 2 years of life expectancy.
âYouâre quiet suddenly.â
âI can talk!! I just⌠forgot every language I know.â
He laughs under his breath. âIâm starting to think you get nervous around me.â
You trip over air, good thing Lewis is holding your hand.
âWHAT?? Nervous?? Around YOU??
No. Never. Iâm very stable. Emotionally. Physically. MentallyâŚokay maybe not mentally.â
Lewis laughs harder and you two walk a bit more in silence but itâs not awkward.
Lewis glances at you, stopped in his tracks, "Can I be honest with you?â
You stop breathing. âSure⌠I think⌠yeahâŚâ
âTonightâs beenâŚunexpected. In a good way.â
You stare at him like youâve never seen a human before. He continues, voice low and gentle.âYou have this way about youâŚ
I canât quite explain it.â
You squeak. Actually squeak.
âPlease donât say things like that. Iâm fragile.â
Lewis chuckles, leaning just slightly closer. âYou look like youâre about to faintâ
You took your hand back and face him, a bit pouty âI am!! Because YOU! youâreâŚYOUâRE LEWIS FUCKING HAMILTON.â
Lewis grins, smiling in the way you reacted âStill just a man, love.â
He talked again voice drops softer. âI meant it...I do want to know more about you and that means I do want to see you again.â
You open your mouth to respond but âŚnothing comes out.
You just inhale sharply like a dying vacuum. Lewis chuckles again. He reaches out, lightly brushing your wrist with his fingers, subtle but electric.
âRelax. Youâre doing great.â
You are most definitely not doing great, you're actually seconds away from melting into the pavement.
Lewis and you decided to end the night and soon after he parks in front of your hotel, the engine humming softly while the world outside feels suddenly too quiet.
Inside the car, itâs just warm shadows, soft music, and Lewis freaking Hamilton looking at you like youâre the most interesting physics problem heâs ever encountered.
You unbuckle your seatbelt with all the elegance of a drunk baby giraffe and blurt âThank you for⌠existingâ then sit there like youâve committed a federal crime.
Lewisâs laugh is immediate and low, the kind of laugh that curls into your spine and stays there. He tilts his head, studying you with that gentle, amused fondness he keeps pulling out like itâs nothing.
âBefore you goâ he says, voice warm enough to melt steel, âI wanted to ask you something.â
Lewis continues, totally unaware heâs about to kill you emotionally âWould you like to come to the next race weekend?â
You start panicking, rambling, caude what the fuck is this question âIâŚI donât know, I mean, my mom, attendanceâŚmoneyâŚIâm already pushing it, I shouldnâtâŚprobably? Maybe? I donâtâŚâ
But he doesnât let you finish. He smiles. Slowly. Like heâs watching a kitten try to fight its reflection. âI didnât say you had to worry about anything,â he says. âIâll take care of everything.â
Your heart falls out the window. âAnd this timeâ he adds, tone dropping into something warm and confident, âI want you in the Ferrari garage.â
âFERRARI??? ME??? RED??? PUBLIC??? FOR YOU..???â You sound like a broken ikea drawer.
Lewis bites back another smile, leaning slightly closer.
You stare at him like he just proposed marriage. âI⌠I donât know yetâ you whisper, because your mom would kill you but your entire soul is saying YES SO LOUDLY ITâS VIBRATING.
And Lewis just nods, patient and soft. âNo pressure. Whenever youâre ready.â
Heâs still smiling at you like he already knows youâre going to show up.
You reach for the door handle, still processing the Ferrari garage sentence like itâs an encrypted nuclear code.
Your brain is soup. Your hands are somehow colder than your soul. You push the door open, and suddenly his hand is on yours.
Warm. Gentle and intentional. It stops you instantly, like someone hit pause on your entire existence.
You turn back, startled, breath catching halfway in your chest.
Lewis looks at you with that soft, steady thing in his eyes, like heâs memorizing you,
like heâs watching the moment happen as if he already knows itâll matter.
His thumb brushes the back of your hand.
âTake care, alright?â Quiet, too intimate for how early it is and somehow exactly right.
For a second you forget English. He releases your hand slowly, fingertips lingering like he doesnât quite want to let go.
Then he smiles, that soft, boyish, devastating smile that could end civilizations.
âGoodnightâ he adds, voice low, like heâs telling a secret.
You step out of the car on shaky legs, close the door gently, and when you turn toward the hotel entranceâŚ
Heâs still watching you. Still smiling. As if youâre the best part of his night.
And then the moment you went in to the hotel, he drives off, leaving you like a malfunctioning NPC.
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