This is Your Captain Speaking

i feel like i’m cursed forever but other than that i’m doing alright

Fanfiction is cool because you get to learn what other people's parents taught them the hymen is like

I know that I had somewhat unusually comprehensive sex ed but it still surprises me every time I'm reminded that some people genuinely think that losing your virginity is a capri sun kind of situation.

Imagine all the things I could do if I just did them.

Dad loves you and feeds you. But he is also dumb and feeds you a wonderfully done wagyu steak. You are 3 days old.

Happy father’s day to the Krestel single dad of 6 Who is doing a wonderful job

Common kestrel (Falco tinnunculus)

Official ornithology post

not to be dramatic but i need a nap, a hug, 20k in cash, and to disappear for 3 months

I'm genderfluid but mostly my gender is just "idiot" so I use she/huh and he/hm? pronouns

I go by those they/umm pronouns too

#mood

i could never handle immortality not because of any existential reasons but because i know itd make my procrastination so much worse. catch me putting off tasks for decades. catch me putting off tasks for centuries. what do you mean that movie ive been meaning to get around to became lost media 40 years ago. what do you mean that landmark ive been meaning to visit has been eroded. oooh i got PLANY of time..............