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Teeny tiny ineffables I drew on my desk calendar

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A collection of shitty GO3 memes, part 2
It’ll never be as good as “nothing legolasts forever” but im cackling anyway
Obviously I never minded it when the ‘Good Omens’ Fandom tried playing around with concepts of, like, Crowley and Aziraphale being Soulmates or being Made for each other or so on. We were just having Fun in our little shared Sandbox. But I really cannot understand why the Actual Writers of the Actual Good Omens Show were like “Hey, do you know what our narrative about Free Will and star-crossed lovers defying their assigned roles to be together needs……. Implications that they’re actually Soulmates bound together by fate!” Like WHAT do they think they were doing here???
Then I thought, ‘Well, this is basically like a Newt and Anathema situation, isn’t it? They’re also a couple from ‘opposite sides’, a Witchfinder and a Witch, who get together but also they are explicitly Predestined thanks to Agnes Nutter’s prophecies….”
But the thing is:
Newt and Anathema’s ‘Hereditary Enemies Turned Lovers’ appeal was always pretty minimal. Newt is barely a Witchfinder, Anathema holds no ill will towards him or his ancestor, there is no real friction in their relationship around that part. The predestination part was by far the main focus.
GO1 and especially Book Omens's Newthema does give us a few nods to how Weird it is to know a relationship you are interested in has also been Determined by Unchangeable Fate.
While all the implications of Aziraphale and Crowley’s ‘Soulmates’ status in GO3 is pretty much always played as unironically straightforwardly Romantic. Even after they supposedly break away from God’s control…. “They will always be together in every lifetime and every universe” is supposed to the bittersweet but triumphant message their story ends on.
At least Newt and Anathema get to burn Agnes’ second book and actively choose to try and live together and freely. You could say Crowley and Aziraphale remaking the world and then reincarnating into Human versions who get married is the equivalent of that, but the fact that they have no conscious memory or awareness of their previous lives remove the aspect of Choice.
Also, GO1 and Book Omens are a bit more… ambivalent about the questions of the Predestination Paradoxes and how Free Will factors with Ineffability. “If God planned for everything and the Ineffable Plan cannot be changed, then this means They actually want Humans to disobey the plan and make their own destiny, so this is still part of the Plan” is the piece of Theological Bullshitting that makes up Aziraphale and Crowley’s main contribution to actually saving the world. It is a positive moment in the context of that storyline.
And in general, the tone of the ending of the Book/GO1 when it explores the idea that disobedience and Free Will are actually part of God’s Ineffable Plan is…. Maybe not in a 100% straightforwardly positive, but is definitely kinda sardonically jovial about the concept. Especially when you consider, like, the moment in the book where Agnes Nutter’s ghost chuckles with both foreknowledge and joy seeing her descendant reject her second book.
And the implication that God’s real plan might be to set the stage for a Humanist revolution against Heaven and Hell…
GO3, meanwhile, is of the opinion that this means that there is no REAL Free Will under these circumstances. This is just a hopeless rigged game that will always end with the destruction of the world one way or another, and this such a dire state and Real Free Will is so important that this is worth it for our two beloved Protagonists to kill themselves over it.
So, yeah, it does feel more discordant that the idea of these characters exploring how their Love might have been one of those things that always felt like disobedience and an expression of their own Free Will was also ‘Predictable’ to God and given by Them just…. never even comes up. Because Someone forbids these two actually get to talk about their relationship in any meaningful way in canon, am I right?
And even more discordant that the idea that their relationship is still controlled by some sort of Cosmic Force of Fate is their Happily Ever After???
Also, like, no offense to Newton Pulsifer and Anathema Device as characters, but who the FUCK ever looked at the Ineffable Husbands and went ‘oh, yeah, you know what would make this even better? If it was more like Newthema!’?????
I have also been entertaining the thought that this ending could be the RESULT of Anathema burning the book.
"Our" Side
The thing about South Downs that gets me is that it was the promise of them being retired. Good Omens started as a comedy about beings (celestial, human, and occult) who are bad at their jobs, and none more so than Aziraphale and Crowley. The two of them invent the entire Arrangement as a way to skive off work and have more time to hang out together! They mouth the party line, but neither one of them more than one-quarter believes it. They always just wanted to quit and hang out and day drink and putter around and goggle at the things humans get up to and occasionally get mixed up in them. The mistake everyone around them made was assuming that being an angel and a demon said something about their nature, but really it was just their job description. And it would have been such a fitting character arc, and perfect send-off, if the ending had gotten things to where they could have said "we are not those jobs anymore, we are just us" and gotten to spend the rest of eternity being themselves. And not working. Which they are very bad at anyway.

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shoutout to my boy Newton Pulsifer, destroyer of chatbots, the hand of death above data centers everywhere
Well!
Oh shit.
(Marc Burrows wrote the biography for Terry Pratchett.)
Went and checked and wow. This is a strong claim. He claims he knows some things for sure but can't tell. This is just getting so confusing and demotivating as time passes (doesn't help that some people are shitalking this man pretty badly... I understand the vague posting is annoying, but still!).
Пау пау😛😛😛
The end of good omens 3 except instead of Satan and God showing up in the bookshop it’s the delivery man from s1 to pick up the backup copy of the Book of Life that has been there all along.
Yes!!! Great idea and we can always count on Leslie!!!
… I think another thing that really hampers and harms the impact the GO3 ending tries to have is GO 2-3’s bad tendency to try and insert whatever paraphrased Book Omens quote had to be cut from GO1 into its dialogue… it’s kinda hard to see Crowley’s speech as this big meaningful climactic and uniquely insightful thing that totally justifies his and Aziraphale's sacrifice and sways God to change the rules of the game for the hell of it when he’s just repeating lines from the beginning of the original novel…
And mostly lines which are Crowley's inner monologue thinking about how little influence Heaven and Hell actually have on Humanity and how they already have free will!
And don’t get me started on how much it emphasizes the irony in having these four supernatural beings determine the fate of the universe and humanity with no feedback from Actual Humans and the irony in the story trying to pretend it has always been about humanity instead of underplaying this aspect of the novel in favor of the Ineffable Husbands Melodrama when Crowley starts using lines cut and stolen from Book!Adam.

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It looks like Crowley's hair is crimped in a behind the scenes picture and it really made me laugh I had to draw about it
If I tried to make a list of everything that went wrong in the final episode, all the OOC moments, plot holes, the themes of the first two seasons and the book that the finale betrayed, and so on, it would end up looking like the document Crowley unrolled in the Job episode.
Well!
So basically Terry didn’t want this, confirmed then
🤡
[from the replies: Marc Burrows wrote Terry Pratchett’s biography]
I'm trying so hard not to blog about GO but I think it's important to add this to this post
There was supposed to be a lot of the late Terry Pratchett in Good Omens 3, the finale to Amazon’s successful apocalyptic series based on th
If you want the fuller picture of what his biographer thinks
compare season one Aziraphale, conscientious objector and/or draft dodger, to season three Aziraphale, celebrated military general. join me as I reflect on this particular little kernel of disappointment for a moment
sets drink down on the bar
i keep saying it.
suicidal pessimist crowley x war criminal aziraphale is not my ship. this isn’t good omens.
and i read the book in the 90s. I’ve been sweeping up in this bar a loooong time.
it’s not even a ship of theseus done in a come back wrong trope. gaddamn. we really got screwed.
When Gabriel tells Aziraphale to prepare himself for the upcoming war and Aziraphale laments, "I'm soft!" He wasn't talking about his physique. Angels can appear however they want to, and their power isn't based on how muscular their corporations are.
He means he is a SOFT PERSON. As in, not hardened, not cynical, not violent or cruel. He wants to believe in the power of love and kindness. He doesn't want a fight.
Making him an important general in the Great War was such a confusing narrative choice to me. There is nothing in S1 or S2 to suggest he ever held that kind of role.
Yes, Aziraphale is a bit of a renegade, lying to God about the flaming sword, finding loopholes around every rule, all in the name of HELPING people. He wants peace when everyone else is screaming for war.
The most warrior-like thing we ever see him do prior to S3 is when he blows up his halo to protect Nina and Maggie in the bookshop. But A) he was defending the innocent, which is what Principalities and guardian angels DO, and B) it was both a last resort and a non-lethal solution.
I wanted to see a badass Aziraphale, yes. But an obedient soldier? A general? What was that even about??
It just gets worse when you think about how the ending was sadistically designed to mess with the audience. That became crystal clear in the script excerpt from the scene at the end: "Crowley swallows. Will this be the second kiss, a declaration of love to match Aziraphale's?" NOPE! Neil Gaiman actively encouraged an expectation that they would have a happy ending, only to viciously tear the rug out from under us. Why? Why put them in this fucked up situation in a COMEDY? Well, no one should have trusted an abuser with writing their ending.
NG really said "I'll give you a kiss, but you won't want it", for season 2, and then he gave us the South Downs ending that no one wanted (though some have accepted or embraced it, happily for them).
In a story where funny twists or loopholes like "actually you're not my father" and "isn't the great plan also the ineffable plan?" saved the day before, there would have been countless different endings that could have stayed true to the ending that Pratchett allegedly wanted, without falling into NG's grim, sadistic, darkness.
💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

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Do you all remember when Good Omens was a comedy??? Yeah... Me too.
Crossing the distance
A Good Omens oneshot, rated T - 5k words
Crowley had a boat.
It was a small boat, called Bentley, that he used to make the connection between Gilmoore and the mainland, from 7 am to his last departure at 6:30 pm. He took a break from 11 am to 3 pm, when nobody needed to cross anymore. Every five minutes crossing could carry around 15 passengers, mostly regulars from the island, going to work or to school on the mainland. He carried the crossing every day except Sundays, as long as the sea allowed him to.
Read here