I’ve seen lots of “Batman is Bruce Wayne’s secret lover” and “Bruce Wayne is Batman’s benefactor” but consider the following unexplored potential relationships:
Batman is Thomas Wayne’s illegitimate child (and therefore Bruce’s half brother)
Bruce is Batman’s LinkedIn Mentor
Batman is Bruce’s dominatrix
They killed someone in a boating accident back in 1997 and are sworn to keep that secret together until they die
Batman is an evil Bruce clone created by Lex Luthor who went rogue
they don’t know each other but Batman keeps saving Bruce because he thinks he knows him from somewhere, maybe
Batman is trying to collect on a ransom for Bruce but you have to rescue him ten times on the punch card
Batman is Jim Gordon and he only rescues Bruce so he can yell at him for letting his ward sleep with his daughter
Batman is a hired actor Bruce employs for PTSD exposure therapy
Etc etc
All I’m saying is, the Gotham tabloids should be getting way more creative and outlandish with their theories. “Oh, they’re sleeping together!” is so lame. Readers need intrigue.
(the batkids write this list and submit it to the local tabloids with little success)
