Incorrect Homestar Runner Quotes

Marzipan: (reading to the Life Blossoms) Whenever people asked him what his secret ingredient was, he’d always give the same answer.

Marzipan: A friend in need is a friend indeed.

Dismissed. That's a SBASAF expression for 'get out'!

Dipshit, you're not turning into the Joker! You're barely even turning into the Penguin, or the ice guy.

Baseball is always some guy who's a physically perfect spercimen bein' guided day and night by world class trainers, nutrashonists, and docters hopin' to beat a world racord set by some guy named Pickles Bitch in 1937 who lived on cigarorttes and moonshine and didn't exercise other than baseball games.

Strong Sad: Why are you opening a new bag of chips when you haven’t finished the first one?

Stonehenge actually sucks, and I hope someone pushes those rocks the hell over real soon.

"He came, he grabbed, they conquered."

I always click the 'track package' button as soon as I get the email. 'Oh boy, I wonder where my package is?' Warehouse.

Cars these days have too many gadgets. I tried to reverse, and it played a video of someone getting run over by a car.

Marzipan: I know the ducks here are adorable, but don’t trust them. They’re pure evil.

I was abandoned as a baby 'n' raised by a wild pack of cigarorttes.