a few of my favorite things

# ILYA ROZANOV IS A COMEDIAN  

A cat is a small creature in the middle of the food chain that is fully aware that you are a very large thing that could stomp its head in at any moment and yet it chooses to rest its tiny little head on your leg for a nap and spreads out on the floor near you exposing its belly and its most sensitive organs. It brings dead mice and bugs to you to share food.

Don’t you get it? This tiny thing trusts you. It wants to help you too. It licks your leg thinking that it’s helping. It kneads on you to find comfort. It shares its body warmth with you in the cold and gives you your space in the heat. It hisses at other mammals it sees outside including other cats in an effort to protect its family.

some merchant: *going on and on about the increasing dangers that kaz brekker is presenting to the economy*

jesper: *side eyes wylan*

wylan: *already making a face at jesper*

also uncle:

once got captured by the earth kingdom army buck ass naked bc he really wanted to go to a hot spring in enemy territory

betrayed zhao at the Northern Water Tribe with no escape plan and then spent 3 weeks starving on a boat

immediately went to a spa resort upon publicly committing treason

ate a poisonous plant and, in the spirit of Two Fish Hook Sokka, was going to solve the problem by eating another potentially poisonous plant

decided the safest place in the world they could go was the city he once FAMOUSLY laid siege to for 600 days

instead of lying low or giving a modicum of a shit about people recognizing him, overachieved himself into becoming one of the most well-known restaurant owners in said city