The G-Gundam of people

(smoking a cigarette) the average american is afraid of what is new and what is foreign, and especially of what is adult. they are trapped forever in daycares of their own design, reading books and watching shows made for children. And while there are interesting things made for children, by and large, they tend to stick to inoffensive, intensely juvenile things that won't challenge them much. And worst of all, if you suggest to your Average American that they should try to step outside of their narrow box, especially if they're trying to become artists, animators, film makers, novelists, etc, everyone acts as if you've just bombed the daycare. Wow.

who's ready to make some money next year

thinking about when i started disco elysium, i was really lost as to how to get out of the starting room and eventually had to ask friends for help. i was completely bewildered because nobody i asked could explain why i was having so much trouble leaving the room. everyone claimed that the room had a door, but it just looked like an isolated hotel room bounded by a black void to me. i wound up slowly trudging around interacting with everything in the room and eventually died to the ceiling fan. i had been expecting the game to be kind of avant-garde and cerebral, so i kept an open mind and kept trying, desperately hoping to find some profundity in my fruitless search for a door that everyone insisted was there. only later did i learn that the game wasn’t meant to run on a 2011 imac and the door to the room hadn’t rendered

a guy shoots at me with a sniper rifle and I catch the bullet in my teeth and eat it, but he saw that coming and put poison in the bullet, but I saw that coming and drank an antidote ahead of time, but all those weird chemicals still give me a really bad kidney stone a few days later and I pass out from pain and crash my car into, by pure coincidence, the sniper

your bed is probably as happy to see you as you are to see it. ‘here comes the warmth slab’ it thinks

wrong it thinks “god hope this dipshit doesnt spill beans all over me again who tf eats beans in bed”

stop reblogging this new year new me i havent spilled beans in bed ONCE this year

uh oh

It gets funnier the earlier in the year you reblog it

IT’S NOT EVEN THE NEW YEAR YET