Icyhug❄️

making an ask game purely out of boredom

if you had to dye your hair, what colour would you pick?

in an emergency, who would you call?

favourite scent and why?

who is a role model in your life, real or fictional?

three people you wish you could meet?

would you rather be permanently moving/on the road, or live in the same place for your whole life?

describe a dream you had recently

favourite accessory you own?

how would you survive an apocalypse or at least attempt to?

dream pet?

song you listened to in childhood?

how do you show affection (this can be platonic or romantic)?

favourite film?

piece of media that left a lasting impact on you?

any “paranormal” or unexplainable experiences?

favourite type of chocolate?

drink of choice?

a compliment you’ve received?

best gift you’ve gotten?

dream car?

describe a nightmare you’ve had?

favourite time of day/night?

a hobby you tried but didn’t stick with?

movie or tv show you want to watch?

dream room?

share one outlook you have on life?

a favourite lyric?

favourite way to spend time alone?

share an adventure you went on?

@nikiexe0

@ilovemybruciewayne

@occasionalauthoring

@joekitsu

@bread-and-bats

@gotham-blight

Of course that makes you happy Damien.

batman will provide a list of rules for the JLA any time they need to work in gotham and the JL will just look between the rules and the group of kids hanging out behind batman like. hold on now.

flash: no metas?

batman: yup.

flash: who’s that then?

batman: that’s signal, he can glow and he’s lovely, now take his fucking name out your mouth.

flash: …

~

superman: and you said no guns?

batman: yeah absolutely no guns allowed.

dick: *from upstairs* dAAAAAAD I’M GONNA BE LATE FOR WORK HAVE YOU SEEN MY BADGE AND GUN?

batman: *yelling back* I THINK YOU LEFT THEM IN THE OFFICE.

dick: OH YEAH, THANKS.

batman: NO PROBLEM SWEETIE HAVE A GOOD DAY AT WORK!

superman: hm.

batman: he’s different.

superman: how?

batman: i love him.

~

wonder woman: you are against taking human life, are you not?

batman: absolutely and that is non-negotiable. we are not judge jury and executioner.

wonder woman: i see. turn around.

*jason and tim two rooftops over, arguing how best to dispose of the loa assassin corpses they just took down*

batman:

batman: i dont see a problem here. those are my sweet boys.

jason, distantly heard from behind: yeah fuck you we’re his sweet boys.

wonder woman: *sighs*

~

batman: honestly the most important thing is that we serve justice and keep morality intact even when dealing with the toughest cases.

green lantern: damian has a secret prison under the titans tower where he’s been torturing their villains rather than trying to reform them.

batman: he’s so cute and small. my baby.

green lantern: bruce-

“Do you want to make a stop for Batburger?”

“Robin.” (Dick, Jason, Tim, Steph, Damian)

“Name five more Batman characters.”

“Robin.” (Carrie, Jarro, Duke, Isabella, Daxton, etc.)

“No. Name five Batman characters who aren’t Robin!”

“…Batman.” (Bruce, Thomas, Jason, Dick, Jean-Paul; also Tim)

“Who don’t share a superhero alias!”

“Gordon.” (Barbara, other Barbara, James, James Jr., Sarah)

“Who aren’t related!”

“…define related. Biologically, legally or emotionally?”

“Just five different names! Five different names of Batman characters!”

“Tim, Robin, Red Robin, Drake, Batman.”

“Please, just—”

Jason: my bad. I got kidnapped

Dick: what masochist kidnapped you?

Jason: the police

Anyways

Bruce and Oliver get deaged to their 20s, but they keep their memories.

And for the first time, they get to enjoy their younger years together. And all is fine... Except...

Oliver kidnaps Bruce. The kids go insane.

There's a video of the secret sons of the pair going around. On a disco, screaming their lungs and covered in sweat. Beat up Chanel$ in the background. The public has so many questions.

Dick is spiraling at having his dad pouting after he scolds him.

The PR team is amazing. They explain that there's a curse on the billionaires. They lie about them not having memories about their real ages.

Zatanna tells the families it'll take AT LEAST three weeks for the spell to dissipate. So Oliver is staying at the manor to avoid complications. Dinah smirks at his younger husband and tells him not to cause too much chaos.

Dick covers for Batman... And they use that shot to run away again. Tim is supposed to be on look out with Cass.

But the next morning there's a video of them four with champagne filled glasses on a limousine. Tim and Bruce are on the sunroof. Cass is laughing as Oliver throws half his body out the passengers seat to sign a t-shirt.

Dick is hyperventilating. Jason thinks it's hilarious, so he's forced to take care of them the next night.

Wrong move.

Jason has them on a jet to Berlin the next morning and he's trying to explain to Dick that Bruce looked at him with puppy eyes.

Dick asks him why he didn't go with them and where is Damian and what is wrong with this family.

Jason and Dick take a jet. Dick is furious at the person Jason chose as Bruce's chaperone. It doesn't matter if Jason tries to explain to him that the chaperone is for Damian, not Bruce, and that he couldn't say no TO THAT. But Dick's not having it.

... Of course there's a new video. Three to be precise. But this time they're more casual.

The first video is the longest. Bruce and Oliver are on the line for Berghain, and a little bit later, Jason and Dick arrive to try to get them out and back to the hotel. The bouncer tells them all to go inside... And Dick pushes them away to get in first.

The second is of them carrying Jason between the Waynes and Oliver recording in front of them.

The third one looks like a normal family outing around Berlin streets; except there's a beautiful woman with them, always standing alongside Damian. Net citizens later identify her as the kid's mother.

Dick has to deal with his siblings rage as soon as they put a feet out of the jet in Gotham.

The three weeks go by, and they return to their lives. Except that now, once a month, Oliver kidnaps Bruce, giving his kids heart attacks, always with a new video appearing of them in god knows what side of the world. Be it drinking a coffee with wonderful ancient ruins as a background, or strolling the roads of a neon illuminated city during the night.

They've been through horror movie level booby traps together. They are painfully and nostalgically trauma bonded and neither admit to the fact how traumatic some experiences were.

I just think the family forgets that until Dick and Bruce recall some memory with nostalgia and have a laugh and it's just the most horrifying traumatic thing ever

---

Dick: Oh remember the time I had to stab myself so we could distract the bad guys and you could take them out? I had to get the angle just right to make sure I don't die

Bruce: Ah yes. You almost did die. Thank God we got you care fast enough

Dick: Pretty sure the speed you knocked those guys out was a new record. It was fun though. Took away my fear of being stabbed. You get used to the pain after a while

Bruce: Yeah, I wanted us out quick. Though I also remember Alfred yelled at us and we decided to hide away from him and watch a movie

Dick: oh yeah! We watched Brave for the first time!

Bruce: *smiles* Yeah I remember. It was nice

The rest of the family: ...

---

Nightwing: [kicks body he just knocked out ] you know what this reminds me of?

Batman: [punching criminals] Spring of 92?

Nightwing: [Bomb blows up empty base] EXACTLY!

Batman: Good times huh?

Nightwing: yup

Everyone on comms: ???

---

Red Robin: it's quiet tonight...

Nightwing: don't say that!

Batman: damn it *grumbles*

Red robin: what? I just said it was qui-

Nightwing: you'll jinx it!

Robin: you don't actually believe that nonsense, do you?

Signal: yeah that seems a little much even for you

Nightwing: Just ask B. He'll back me up

Redhood: *snorts* yeah right. B isn't one to believe in jinxes

Nightwing: oh no jinxes are very real. We found out the hard way

Spoiler: right. And what would that be?

Batman: *gruffs* 10 months

Red robin: what?

Batman: 10 months of not a single quiet night because robin decided to jinx it

Nightwing: I said I was sorry! I regret it. I will never do it again

Red Robin: 10 months? You can't be serious

Red hood: yeah there is no way there was no quiet night for 10 months straight

Nightwing: [shrugs] what can I say? Old Gotham was something else

Batman: *sorrowful* 10...months... *shudders*

---

Robin: Nightwing! You got hit with fear toxin. We need to get you to the cave now!

Nightwing: *sniffs* hmm nah this is an old formula. I'll be good

Red Robin: yeah the scans say it's an old batch some lousy gang got their hands on an- wait how'd you know that?

Nightwing: the new toxin smells kinda like lemon mixed with chlorine. The old one smelled like-

Batman: warm pineapples

Nightwing: exactly!

Spoiler: wait is that why you two don't go near pineapples

Nightwing and Batman: [nod]

Robin: that does not matter. Nightwing you still need an antidote. Father you must make Nightwing get proper treatment against the toxin

Nightwing: don't worry baby bat. Like I said it's an old toxin, I have built immunity

Everyone: what?

Nightwing: we didn't have an antidote back in the early days so we needed to make sure the toxin wouldn't immobile us

Batman: Yes. With lack of proper masks, since most couldn't stop the toxin, and Scarecrow finally perfecting his toxin we needed a solution

Nightwing: so we built immunity

Red hood: wait on purpose? Intentionally?

Batman: yes

Black bat: but for that you'd have to-

Nightwing: be exposed to the toxin in small doses repeatedly and consistently. Yes

Everyone: ...

---

Red Robin: Damn it's cold out

Red hood: Patrolling in the winter sucks man. Gotham winter is so wet.

Nightwing: yeah the built in heat system in these suits is a life saver.

Red Robin: yeah literally, I don't think you could actually survive hours of patrol in this weather without them

Nightwing: eh you could

Red hood: it's in the negatives here, Wing. It snowed 5 inches last night. Without the heating system we'd be goners.

Batman: Yes however if you were to keep moving and take calculated breaks with a warm beverage patrol would be manageable.

Red Robin: I guess but who'd be stupid enough to ris-

Red robin: ....

Everyone: .....

Red hood: YOU DIDN'T EVEN WEAR PANTS WHAT THE FUCK

Nightwing: we didn't have all this advanced tech in our suits back then it's not my fault

Batman: though the pants issue is one I argued on more than one occasion

Nightwing: I needed my freedom!

Batman: It was -5°C, you needed your legs attached to your body

Nightwing: I made it out fine

Everyone: debatable

---

Dick: I got here as fast as I could

Bruce: Thanks. Here's the files

Jason: did we really need to call Dickie bird all the way from Bludhaven? This doesn't seem all that big of a deal

Tim: yeah we could probably handle this on-

Dick: oh come on! Not them again

Bruce: yeah I thought so. I was just hoping it wasn't

Tim: ah so it's an old case? That's why you called Dick?

Damian: was it really that bad?

Bruce: not bad in the sense they were difficult to catch per say...

Dick: It's a group of maniacs obsessed with horror movies who last time we encountered them tried to re-create SAW

Jason: ....you're kidding

Dick: Nope. How do you think I lost my finger

Everyone: .... You WHAT?!

Dick: you guys didn't know? My left pinky finger is fake *detached and reattaches finger*

Jason: argh gross

Dick: yeah had to cut it. Nothing compared to Bruce though he had to-

Bruce: alright that's enough

As time went on, it eventually spread to Young Justice, Birds of Prey, even the Outlaws, etc. also hearing about it as the heroes joined or siblings worked in different teams and called on Batman and he came with solutions and answers and comfort, albeit awkward.

The thing about Batman is that he answers the questions, comes when they need him, listens to them ramble, patches up their hurts and stays when they ask. He's there when they need him so they gravitate to him even when they don't.

The league doesn't notice... they never seem to when it comes to their charges and mentees.

Don't get me wrong, the original lineup absolutely adore their brother, but technically only the Flash or rather Barry knows (mainly because his protégés actually speak to him about things and because Barry kinda adopted Bruce too, though to him Bruce is more of a big brother than dad but kind of a dad nonetheless). The remaining original leaguers adopted Bruce as their little brother, except for Hal cause they act like the same age.

It doesn't mean they're any less protective of him, both in general and in battle, he is the only actual baseline human on the original team after all. The original leaguers are overprotective but know better than to cross his boundaries. They respect him and his expertise, for all they want to protect him.

Bruce never notices or rather realises. He loves them and supports them, but that's just how he is. He doesn't know they notice or that they care so much. They want to ask him for what his to them, but they're waiting (stalling) for the right moment. Obviously he knows that vaguely he is a father/ mentor type to the Gotham vigilantes. They call him dad (and equivalents they're comfortable with using) for the love of god.

But Bruce is unaware that his kids or any kids or even any hero for that matter, love and adore him. Like ye They idolise, admire, revere him...they're hero-worship for Batman is he only that never wore off and the only one they'd never admit to. The truth? They just say that to him because who would ever admit to Batman (their DAD) that he's their idol. Who are they kidding he probably knows anyways. He doesn't but the kids don't realise. It's not like they could ever bring themsleves to deny it reliably. They always get that look on their faces when talking about him. No matter what they actually say to him.

Even his villains are super protective of him and kinda in love him (most platonically, but some are romantically even though they know they don't have a chance with him).

That's the thing about Batman, about Bruce Wayne, whomever meets him, the real him, falls in love with him and would scorch the earth for him, be they a hero, a villain or any other.

He also misses all the signs of the heroes' adoration and admiration. All the heroes, even the kids, including the ones he raised, think he knows how much they love him. The truth? He doesn't see or know shit.

Bruce also knows all the kids' names, partly because they're friends with his kids and partly because he's helped train them from the beginning.

ところでミンホアは今は何をしてるんですか？

- Batman (2025) #10