My Blog

but ykw at least i'm not on mount everest. at least i'm not paying tens of thousands of dollars to slowly suffocate in a 300-person line at the gates of hell. never in my life will i have to be steered in a hypoxic stupor through the maze of poop and corpses atop mount everest. on this earth a lot of horrible things can happen to you without your permission but there are a few that you have to opt into. you can just say no thanks! and be guaranteed never to have to be on mount everest. much to be grateful for actually

still not on mount everest this morning 😌 alhamdulillah

Vampire girl explaining that vampires don’t necessarily have to kill someone to drink their blood, but she did kind of kill a lot of people back when she was all depressed pre-transition: “when I was an egg I ate four dozen lads”

Pet play but instead of a cute puppy in a stray dog with several diseases

I don’t understand why freaky religious people don’t go to freaky religious schools. Why are there normal people trapped at Liberty University and Brigham Young University and people like that University of Oklahoma student in normal colleges trying to site the Bible like it’s an academic source? There are schools for you, babe! If you don’t believe in basic sociology and science, Bob Jones University would loveeeee to have you!

Someone euthanize me Jesus fucking Christ

You guys dont understand this is literally my daughter

why is this post completely broken in every way imaginable

It’ll be almost impossible to find this post unless it wanders across your dash.

It wandered across mine. I shall help it travel forward.

this is not a place of honor

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

you should be able to walk into your local CVS and get your uterus removed for $14.99 bro like I don't even care anymore

some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.

I couldn't remember the word "doorknob" ten minutes ago.

REBLOG TO SAVE A WRITER'S LIFE

I use this every time I sit down to write. It's the best tool in the world and I would be lost without it!

This goes for assholes, too, guys. I know a couple who went tubing once, and they had to re-air their tubes, but the guy thought it would be funny to stick the tip of the air compressor up to her bikini trunks, the air ruptured something inside her and she died within thirty minutes.

WHAT?

The thing about this? It’s in every pregnancy book I’ve read.

WHAT?????

Why is it in pregnancy books but not sex ed books?

Because the men in charge only care about the health and safety of women in so far as it enables them to have babies.

https://www.healthline.com/health/air-embolism#outlook

Reblogging with a link because I thought this was a legit joke. Never heard it before. Like I knew you could kill a person by inserting air into a vein but still.

WHAT THE FUCL I hate how I didn’t learn this in sex Ed AT ALL

This is very true lol

I feel like I first saw this in The Joy of Sex, but it’s definitely a thing.

What the fuck

hm. 

I legit thought this was a shitpost until I saw the rest of the comments

I first saw this in The Joy of Sex, too.

Well I never

I’m asexual but reblogging to potentially save lives