Fords Words @iamkinglizard - Tumblr Blog

Classic Zucc via /r/dank_meme https://ift.tt/2GCZ8iZ

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inactiveaccount12345678

My roomba is scared of thunderstorms

I was sitting at my desk just a few minutes ago, drawing, and a really loud crack of thunder went off–no power surges or anything, just thunder–and my roomba fled from its dock and started spinning in circles

I currently now have an active roomba sitting quietly on my lap

systlin

Humans will pack bond with anything.

apostatively

I had a teenage girl come into my tea shop with her mother the other night. She purposely grabbed a teamaker in the most crunched-up looking box on the shelf (got banged around in shipment) and carried it protectively over to the counter. “If something’s in a damaged box I have to get it because I’m afraid no one else will love it,” she laughed nervously.

Not only will humans pack bond with anything, the empathy level of adolescent girls in particular likely has puppy-saving, world hunger-solving, war-ending powers.

a-dull-glow

I once saw a really bumpy lime at the grocery store, just a real ugly fruit. Later that night my boyfriend & I were driving home from rehearsal at like 11:30pm & passed the grocery store & I stared crying & he said “is it that lime? Do you want to go back and get it?” And I nodded and pulled the car around and bought the lime.

bpd-dylan-hall-deactivated20190

“our teeth and ambitions are bared” is a zeugma

and it’s a zeugma where one of the words is literal and one is metaphorical which is the BEST KIND

tuesdayisfordancing

I didn’t know about zeugmas until just now! That is so awesome, everybody:

zeug·ma ˈzo͞oɡmə/

noun

a figure of speech in which a word applies to two others in different senses (e.g.,John and his license expired last week ) or to two others of which it semantically suits only one (e.g., with weeping eyes and hearts ).

ISN’T THAT AWESOME??

professorsparklepants

#in english class in high school my teacher had us write our own zeugmas in class#and one guy came up with ‘he fell from her favor… and the window’#i am forever looking for opportunities to use that one

siesiegirl

She dropped her dress and inhibitions at the door.

crumbvulet

What’s this? My favorite rhetorical device showing up on my dashboard?

thranduilland

IT HAS A NAMEEEE!! OH MY GOD!!!

candiikismet

I LOVE THIIIIIS!!!

orriculum

One I’ve loved was “on their weekend trip they caught three fish and a cold”

I love these they’re like a pun and a metaphor wrapped up into one neat phrase

jasnakisapa

@jwlzrulezz rhetorical device of the day

wordsmith-storyweaver

She stole my heart and my cat. 😀

inkandblade

OH.

herelieslill-deactivated2022041

crime pulp is full of zeugma and it’s the greatest. “she was the kind of girl who’d break your heart, or maybe your arm.”

browsedankmemes

Accurate chart via /r/memes https://ift.tt/2GBCc3G

straightwhiteboystexting

chocobohno

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wronghands1

tastefullyoffensive

(via bbymandi)

tastefullyoffensive

(via bbymandi)

lohver

if life has treated you like trash and you still make an effort to be a good person i appreciate you. thank you.

operaqueen

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kittje

Muriel and Eustace get a special treat: bahnahnah 🍌

tockthewatchdog-deactivated2020

me: hey can you make dopamine and serotonin

my brain:

browsedankmemes

The truth has been spoken via /r/dank_meme http://ift.tt/2CEUwDd

coaltar-of-the-deepers

LAST JEDI SPOILERS

yoda straight chillin

essence-of-armbarring

"He’s not fit to be my daughter’s boyfriend," Dad declares after witnessing junior high school boy’s lack of fighting game skills.

assuming i ever get good at fighting games, challenging some kid that thinks he’s worthy to be my daughter’s bf by testing him in guilty gear is absolutely something i would fucking do

powerburial

if you cant air dash or roman cancel, how can you take care of my daughter

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