WELL THEN.

Hello there.

This is an alt account that I have made.

I am here…… to write x reader stuff.

That is right.

OKAY.

Let it soak in to your brain.

The fandoms that I will write for are::::

STAR TREK. (TOS, TNG, and DS9 (more to be added later))

HOMESTUCK.

MY LITTLE PONY.

METALOCALYPSE.

CREEPYPASTA.

DEATH NOTE.

METAL FAMILY.

KICK-ASS.

ZOOLANDER.

I WILL WRITE IMAGINES, HEADCANONS, AND MAYBE EVEN SHORT STORIES.

NO NSFW

Do not expect these to be good. I am but a simple man. These will be cringey and embarrassing but that is what you want if you are here. The bottom line is that I will make sure these have proper grammar and spelling, and that they are coherent and semi-in character.

Expect the Star Trek stuff to be much higher quality since I dedicate all of my time to study these characters. I have their personalities engrained in my BRAIN.

Oh also, the beginning of these posts will probably just be self indulgent stuff.

I got excited when I saw you do metal family stuff so can I request dating headcannons for Dee? Thank you in advance : D

Sure!!! This is the broadest request I have received lol which I am honestly glad about since I am out of practice

hcs under the cut

Sure!

Neither Glam nor Victoria are used to being with someone shy, Glam himself is more of a listener so getting talking with him may be a challenge (and truly, is there really any time it is not a challenge for him) but he will do his best to make sure you are comfortable.

Glam takes a subtle role in the relationship, which he is more used to, and supports you when needed. He will speak up for you when you are having trouble and reassure you if you feel anxious or insecure

Victoria on the other hand is very proactive. It may be a bit awkward with her at first because she is not very used to dealing with shyer people but she is doing her best… She will stand up for you no matter what just as always but being around you does bring out a more vulnerable side to to her, whether she likes it or not. She worries about hurting you in accident, emotionally and physically, although she tries not to show it.

Yessss, love this

When Dee sees you he almost immediately falls in love, he is used to hating almost everyone at school for being “boring” so seeing you dressed up and just being yourself so boldly he is instantly drawn to you.

He starts to start putting even more thought into his appearance to impress you, but he does not DARE to approach you yet. He hopes that he can get you to notice him first.

Goth music is not his personal favorite but he respects the genre and will start listening to it just to understand you more and “get closer to you”

If you notice him first he will definitely become cocky, his thought process automatically gets him to think that his plan worked even if that was not why you approached him at all. Regardless, he is going to start listing off everything he learned about the subculture to try and impress you.

Once you enter a relationship he feels less of a need to make himself seem “cooler” and relaxes a bit, although it takes a while for him to relax fully. He wants you to do his makeup and will be annoying about it, asking him if he looks good and trying to get you to compliment him, and he will ALSO want to ruin your makeup by kissing you.

YES!

Dee gets a book from an antique store or the “dark web” (ha) believing 1. It is fake and 2. Even if it were real he would be smart enough to handle it. Neither of these things are true. Dee is plenty smart but his skepticism combined with cockiness leads to the worst mess up possible. Maybe he reads it to scare Heavy or to make himself look cool but it backfires terribly.

When you appear Dee is just shocked, he always believed that cults were full of crazy delusional idiots that would believe anything. It takes a while for him to process that you are actually real. When he finally does, he gets curious.

He asks you hundreds of questions, tries to figure out how your summoning was possible, and while he does he slowly begins to form a crush on you. Half of it is based on your supernatural form and the curiosity he has for it but he also begins to genuinely like you.

Dee is not stupid enough to make a deal with you, instead he sells the book to someone he deems a “chump” (although he was too in the exact opposite way) so you are stuck with him. He does his best to hide you from everyone, which is hard because every instinct in him tells him to boast about it.

Confessing to you is a whole ordeal, Dee does not believe someone as powerful as you could ever like him despite how close you two have grown, and it takes you forcing it out of him for you two to start dating.

yep!!!!

*ches is not a perfect boyfriend, he has his issues, but he really does love you.

*shows you souvenirs and trinkets from his band days, loves to tell you stories.

*verrrryyyy big on pda, will have some part of himself touching you 24/7. his hand on your back, touching shoulders, leaning on you, he will find a way.

Thank youuu :3

yes!!!

*Dee would be a little stuck up about you not knowing Russian and probably tease you a bit but he really loves teaching you Russian.

*He thinks your accent is cute and has to hide his blush when you say something wrong.

*Dee will “begrudgingly” show you things and takes you places, he likes seeing your reaction to Russian culture and likes teaching you things.

*On your side, he finds your own culture interesting. He already knows English and other Germanic languages so learning German would probably pretty easy for him because of the similar alphabet. Even with a different language base, he would be happy to learn a new alphabet for you. Not that he would say it was for you though.

*Calls you nicknames in Russian because he knows you cannot understand them and learns compliments in your language as well to catch you off guard.

*He knows how to cook basic dishes, so he would probably cook some traditional foods for you, or just buy them for you.

*He WILL show you off as his *insert nationality here* boyfriend. Be prepared.

*HE WILL USE YOUR LACK OF KNOWLEDGE TO HIS ADVANTAGE. saying stupid stuff like “you know, *physical trait you have* is a beauty standard here…” LYING BASTARD. But to him it is true. Any ethnic features you have he finds fascinatingly beautiful.

*He likes how new your perspective is, he is used to a lot of things you are new to so it is fun for him to see you interact with things.

YAYYY!!! First ask in a while and first time doing metalocalypse so SORRY IF THIS SUCKS!!!

Nathan would definitely be an awkward uncle. NOT the cool uncle, but he wished he was. He is the kind of uncle at a family reunion who gives you a silent pat on the shoulder and a 20 dollar bill and then leaves you alone for the whole time,,, BUT HE REALLY DOES CARE!!

The visits probably started out as your idea and then Nathan would start asking you over because "one of the other boys wanted to see you", which is true, but he just wanted to see you.

SPEAKING OF WHICH. Pickles NAGS about you. classic midwestern mom kind of thing, worrys about if you ate enough, asks how things are in your "actual" home, but of course is still Pickles and offers you drinks. He can be overbearing but he still knows how to be casual even when his parental instincts kick in.

In terms of 'family dynamics' between you and the boys here is how it goes: Nathan: Uncle, obviously Pickles: Dad Skwissgaar: Older brother Murderface: Middle child Toki: Younger brother or same position as you

Charles tries not to get involved in your dynamic withe the boys but he is also legally (and morally) required to check in with you about your home life. He has probably talked to you about moving in full time, probably because Toki asked him to. He is happy with you as long as the band is happy.

Try not to expect very much mushy stuff but eventually it will slip out...

I am writing this while taking a shit at a metalhead Russian guy’s kind of wedding (set in an Italian restaurant, DELICUOUS salad) so let that set the tone for this.

Ok….first of all: Dee would probably be a little bit surprised about your gifts to the family, he would NOT expect you to go all out for that kind of thing, but he would be SO RELIEVED because he knows you

Biker Gloves??? Ohhh HELL YEAH. Vicky would give Heavy a noogie to "test them out" (she loves her sons :3) and flex for Glam

HEAVY WOULD BE *SO* HAPPY. I think he would immediatly forget about all social obligations and run to his room to play the game...

I assume you would have a hard time finding a gift for the elusive Glam but he would be curteous no matter what you got him (unless it is absolute shit)

I AM CURRENTLY IN THE PREDICIMENT OF..... : WRITING BLOCK!!!! AND IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT MY FRIEND WOULD LIKE A FANFICTION TO EXIST THAT DOES NOT EXIST YET.

I DO NOT HAVE THE WILLPOWER TO WRITE SAID FANFICTION, BUT I COULD WRITE SOMETHING ELSE.

I PROPOSE: A FIC TRADE!!!

I WILL WRITE SOMETHING FOR YOU, YOU WILL WRITE THE STORY FOR MY FRIEND.

1,000 WORDS, BEETLEJUICE SCREAMING KINK. BEETLEADAM, BEETLEBABS, OR BEETLEADAMBABS.

PLEASE CONSIDER!!!

MY AO3 ACCOUNT NAME IS SAMBOT2000XP, YOU CAN FIND MY WRITING THERE.

I WILL WRITE STAR TREK, RE-ANIMATOR, MLP, SLASHERS, ANYTHING THAT I HAVE WATCHED AND ENJOYED!!!!!

PLEAASEEE READ IT!!!!

BARCLAY X READER.......

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Reginald Barclay/Reader, Reginald Barclay/You Characters: Reginald Barclay, Reader Additional Tags: Trans Male Character, Boypussy, reginald barclay is kind of an incel but you knew that already, I Wrote This While Listening to My Chemical Romance's Music, Fluff, Queer Themes, Not explicitly stated but it is very queer, Trans Reginald Barclay, Trans porn by a trans author, Aftercare, Nipple Play, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, No Dialogue, Autistic Reginald Barclay, not mentioned but it is an undeniable fact of life, Dom/sub Undertones Summary:

Reginald Barclay's holodeck fantasies were nothing like this. In which you dominate Barclay.

_ The name is from Charles Bukowski's erotic poem 'The Shower' because it is SO FUNNY.