Discord's Resolution -- A FLUTTERCORD ONESHOT
Discord is a creature of chaos. But when his reckless actions turn a good intention into a standoff between Equestria and three of its most powerful villains, he has more than a few apologies to make -- even though it seems like only one really matters.
Basically, a oneshot about Discord being an overthinking simp, set the morning after Cozyglow, Tirek and Queen Chrysalis are turned to stone.
(go check out on ao3!!!): https://archiveofourown.org/works/74220061
In all its years, Equestria had never known the true meaning of a ‘resolution’ – at least not until the day that the Lord of Chaos made his greatest one.
Sitting under the mossy eaves of Fluttershy’s cottage, Discord could tell that a harsh morning was encroaching on Equestria.
It tasted like bitter salt in the air, he thought. The nerves in his cheeks burned, and his tongue was punctured by an unpleasant sort of ache. Worst of all, though, the taste in his mouth brought Discord an amount of unease and – could it be? – anxiety that he hadn’t felt for the longest time.
This tangy discomfort had nothing to do with any tangible, solid threats from the outside world. It wasn’t because of the clustering clouds up above, or the dewy grass below, or the subtle shifting of leaves as summer fell into fall. It certainly wasn’t because of Ceslestia’s rising sun, which rose in the background with grace and with pride like the crowning jewel of a headpiece.
No, the harshness he felt around him was a different sort. It was the kind that not many creatures felt, and which only came to Equestria once every aeon or so, whenever a terrible catastrophe was caused by a teensy-weensy, tiny, stupid mistake…
He’d been spending the last twenty minutes distracting himself with the sunrise. Usually his escapisms involved activities with a little more chaos and ‘pizazz’, but the view was helping the Lord of Chaos bring to mind a little phrase he had coined from Fluttershy’s friend Treecuddler a while back… something about how every day was like a new play, and while at sunset the curtain always fell upon the third act, sunrises were like fresh starts, new leaves.
He reckoned he needed one of these, above all. Which is maybe why he was sitting here watching solar phenomena in the front garden of a Ponyville pegasus, struggling to ignore the complete scandal and, well, discord, that had befallen the kingdom of Equestria the previous day.
“The current state of affairs isn’t looking so bright, I’m afraid.” He looked guiltily towards a family of humming birds that was nestled in the roof above. Was he talking to them, or to himself? Looking around, he saw that there were no duplicates of Discord to speak with, so figured it was the former. He hovered up to the family, watching them but not really observing. “At least the worst is over now, I suppose. Even though I could’ve prevented all of this in the first place.”
He knew they weren’t listening to his heartfelt confidences, but that was okay. Enough creatures hated Discord already, and who could even blame them? Yesterday had been the new princess’ coronation, but in an attempt to boost Twilight Sparkle’s ego, he’d instead unionised three tyrants, upended centuries of magical architecture, and jeopardised an entire kingdom of civilians.
He should’ve known it was a fool’s game. Nobody can keep beasts at bay when it comes to matters of world dominion, not even Discord himself. Cozyglow… Tirek… Queen Chrysalis. And now he needed to make a lot of apologies – even though it seemed like only one really mattered.
“Fluttershy has never done any real harm in her life,” he mused. “Frankly, I don’t even think she could, her being the Element of Kindness and all. I really ought to give her more credit for her efforts, don’t you think?”
A floating ‘thumbs-up’ drifted above him, carried by the wind.
In all honesty, this sequestered chink of Ponyville seemed like his one and only respite from the world. Fluttershy’s cottage wasn’t quite in town, but it wasn’t quite in the Everfree either, and this assortment of ‘in-betweens’ felt like the perfect liminal space for him, made of animals and luscious greens. A holding ground of sorts, perhaps for him and his many mistakes – though hopefully not all of them, because he had a feeling they might be too heavy even for this place.
And yet here he was, a voice reminded him, hovering and lurking outside of her cottage instead of actually stepping inside. Like he didn’t want to go in.
A thought bubble bubbled into view beside him, ‘And why do you think that is, Discord?’ it read in size 14 font comic sans.
Excellent question. He coughed up a few meagre excuses – ‘The gravel on the ground will get stuck in my hoof,’ ‘She’s probably still asleep,’ ‘I’m far too hungry for civil conversations right now’ – but in the end, the only person he could never lie to was himself. Because the truth was that he was afraid. Afraid to find out how Fluttershy felt about him after what he’d done, and it seemed that despite being part-dragon, he was not immune to the fiery burn that would come from the rejection of a heart as gentle and tender as Fluttershy’s. Far too many thoughts were racing in and out of his mind, clustering and crumbling, and they were all coloured in pink and gold and teal, shaped as hooves and hearts and hinds.
How many times would fate make him relearn the same lessons? Discord had never considered himself much of a scholar, but even if he was graded on a curve he was bound to fail. What would he tell his sweet Fluttershy? That all the reformation in the world couldn’t stop him from being a monster? Equestria was strung out like a washing line that reached all the way to Canterlot, and he was the only one at fault.
And so with all of this blame and treason lying on his chest, it was with no hesitation that he made the greatest resolution of his life: He was never going to endanger Fluttershy or her friends ever again.
No more gambles with Equestrian fate. No more half-baked ideas. No more secrets.
Right now, Discord was a fatality to the only mare he cared about – but a master of chaos can change anything if he tries hard enough.
Discord was a maestro in avoidance. Performative — check. Ignorant — check. Delusional — check, check, check.
So to get over his fear of knocking on the front door, he decided that bypassing the need entirely would make his whole endeavour a lot simpler. That was how, with a snap of his fingers and a zap of light, he found himself pressed against the inside of Fluttershy’s front door. I mean, best friends could show up uninvited, right?
Then he lifted his drooping ear, listening out for the mare in question.
Anxious hoofsteps and bustle emerged from the kitchen. Discord was rarely one for domestic humdrum, but whenever he was in this cottage he couldn’t help but listen in to the ridiculous banalities of pony life. The way Fluttershy’s two old pots clanked against each other in the sink, or the way her faucet dripped, or the way her windows squeaked when they were wiped clean. It was weird – why did this excite him more than his jaunts through the spacetime continuum?
The fresh influx of sounds and sensations had almost made him forget the real reason he’d come here. But even the aroma of cookies wafting out the oven couldn’t permanently erase the guilt in his gut. It roiled inside him, it twisted and it turned. He was all for rollercoasters, but even this felt like a bit much.
Yeehaw Discord, buck up will ya? This anxiety ain’t got no rope-hold on ya! You’re tellin’ me all this stress is for a pony!
A tiny apparition of himself, clad in a western getup, was whispering through his left ear. It wasn’t a persona he took on very often – if at all – and for a moment he wondered if he was losing his already tenuous grasp on reality.
On the other end, pirate Discord – another rare find– was listening to the cowboy and nodding along in agreement.
Arrr, ye hear that! A PONY! Matey, ye have fled from harmony for aeons; ye have travelled the seven dimensions (and many more)! And now yer actin’ like some horse is the sunken ship of your dreams?
“Fools,” Discord muttered, flicking both of them away with a vehement swing of his paw. “She’s not just ‘a pony’”.
He decided on a frivolous entrance. Another snap of his weathered talons brought Discord a foot above Fluttershy’s kitchen table, and a fanfare of invisible trumpets played in his wake – an addition which he hoped was in good taste, and not kitschy or – heaven forbid – cliche.
“Fluttershy! Good-morning! Your favourite Draconequus is here, with a more than apologetic apology, he hopes!”
Fluttershy jumped at the sound of the musical number behind her (oops). Regardless, though, Discord’s presence seemed to bring nothing but smiles and spirit to the lovely mare, at least once she had a second to compose herself.
He sighed in relief; at least she didn’t hate him.
“Oh, my, Discord. What are you doing here so early in the morning?”
He spent a generous amount of time forming his response. As it turned out, no matter how many times he saw Fluttershy, he never got used to it. This morning, for instance, with the sun’s gradient filtering through her voile drapes, he saw clearer than ever the three little freckles that only appeared on her face during the summer months. Her sheen of pale hair, too, was a sight for precious eyes, brushed aside into an electric state of ordered disarray, like there was no amount of chaos in the world that could sway her from genuine perfection. Or was ‘perfection’ a little too forward, a little too presumptuous of a word? Everypony claimed there was no such thing, but there was no one more qualified than Discord in matters like these. He was Perfection’s antithesis by nature, after all; it could only be the pony least like him who utterly emulated perfection.
…He peeled his eyes away quicker than he would’ve liked. He didn’t want Fluttershy to believe he was scrutinising her for any of the wrong reasons.
“Ah… well, I just told you, dear,” He stumbled over his syllables. Words that should’ve been second nature seemed nothing more than an afterthought. “I’m here to apologise.”
As soon as these words left Discord’s mouth, a barrage of confetti fell from the ceiling, spelling out the word ‘SORRY’ as they fell one by one atop her checkered tablecloth. Pinks and purples blended to one upon their green backdrop, hiding the waterlilies that embellished the cotton spread.
Fluttershy stifled her groggy laughs by bringing her hoof to her mouth.“But you’ve already apologised!”
“Nonsense, dear. Tell me, what do you want! Fresh flowers? A new birdhouse? A statue in the Canterlot gardens? I’m sure I could pull some strings for that last one…” Each object that he listed off appeared in the room around them, carnations in a hand-painted vase, birdhouse (or birdmansion) hanging from the rafters, and statue standing tall in the lounge behind them.
“No, I’m all right, thank you.”
He snapped everything away, although he kept the flowers on the counter. Carnations weren’t Fluttershy’s favourite to look at, but he knew that some of her pets were particularly fond of the flavour.
She stared at them a moment before speaking again. “Discord, you’re being way too hard on yourself. Have you already forgotten that you rescued us from the trio of tyrants yesterday, even when you were chained up and drained of all your magic? You saved Equestria on nothing more than your instincts.” She put a particular emphasis on the all – and Discord wondered briefly if his rescue-skills were really that surprising?
He decided to let the thought slide, though, as other ones overtook it. Fluttershy seemed oddly collected about the whole situation regarding the triumvirate of villains, and even he knew that he had overstepped his line there. Like, a lot. “Yes, well, you fail to mention the part where I got all of us into that confounded mess in the first place.”
Fluttershy opened her mouth as though to speak, but any words she had thought up seemed caught in the cusp of her throat. She froze, and it took her so long to move that Discord started to wonder if he’d accidentally swapped her out with the statue he’d just made. In fact, if his face hadn’t fallen into a despondent frown right then, she might’ve never spoken again. “Um! w-well… uhm… we all make mistakes...”
“What’s important is that we learn from them and approach future scenarios like this with caution.”
“Oh, believe me,” Discord snorted, “This was a singularly unique occurrence. After all,” He bowed with great austerity, a breasted-waistcoat appearing around his chest, “I am bound by a new piece of legislature.”
He didn’t think much of these words. Sure, his new ‘Resolution’ was hardly a state-issued law, but didn’t all important constitutions and agreements start from something small? So when Fluttershy dropped the tea cloth draped around her wing and ran to the seat closest to him, he wondered what the fuss was all about.
“Oh no! What!” She looked at Discord in an offended frenzy. “They’re taking legal action? I don’t understand! You only broke the law a little bit, really. Has Celestia sanctioned you? Exiled you? Or–” She gasped, “Surely it wasn’t Twilight?”
Now it was Discord’s turn to sit in dumbfounded silence. Ah. Just Brilliant. His overly-liberal use of lawyer jargon had caused a panic. Way to go Discord!… once again.
She kept up a fretful string of grievances, and even though she had jumped to conclusions he was touched by her gushing concern. He still found great difficulty in processing the ins and outs of ‘friendship’, and he still felt it was… strange, the way she always rushed to his defence. It was like sometimes, even after all they’d been through, he couldn’t quite believe – couldn’t quite let himself believe – that Fluttershy was his best friend, and that she would do anything for him.
Even though he would do the same, and ten times more, at a simple beckoning of her hoof.
“Now, now, there’s no need to worry that pretty little head of yours,” He placated, immediately flinching at the sound of his own voice. ‘Pretty little head’? Really?
Swatting away his thoughts, he reached for the mare’s hooves and held them with great care; almost as if they were fragile crockery from her cupboards, except that they also made his fingers tingle. “Seriously, Fluttershy, do you really think I would let Celestia exile me from ponyland? I’m old enough to be her great-great-great-grand-stallion!”
“Well… I guess she did turn you into stone that one time…” But her syrupy voice melted, drifting off with thoughts that had clearly gone unsaid. Looking down he saw her pupils dancing between them, and he pondered if her trailing off had anything to do with his warm palms around her. Her eyes waltzed between their bodies and her hooves, between his talon and his paw. Dancing, hidden behind the fine swoop of her pink bangs.
“Ah… stone? Yes, well, I really don’t know why you feel the need to bring that up all the time,” He harrumphed. “Why can’t we just let bygones be bygones?...” His voice tried to be frustrated, but instead it came out gruff and faraway. Admittedly, he was a little distracted by the fact that she was being distracted, and he had no idea why. Confound it! had she gotten Zecora to hex him, or what? Discord seemed drawn to every little action and inaction of hers, and it was such a persistent need that it almost felt unnatural. So what if she leaned into his touch? So what if– if–
She shifted her hooves under his weight, and the tickles that had started off small were sent shooting through his arms and into the crooks of his chest. The flutters– oh, it was like real butterflies, ones that rose to his chest but then dropped way down low. It was another one of those rollercoasters that came to him unbidden.
Fluttershy gulped, averting her eyes to the floor. “Well, anyways… What did you mean by legislature, then?”
“Oh, right, that.” He twisted towards the hot mess of confetti behind him. “You can call me a bureaucrat, if you’d like. I’m sure you of all ponies will like what I have to say.”
“And why is that?” Her voice dropped low, like water under the bridge – and it reminded him of his many indiscretions, which also sank far, far beneath them like rotten treasures lost in deep seas. Rotten troubles that Fluttershy had forgiven and discarded.
Even though he’d never deserved it, not even now.
He bashfully unfurled his hand, and a tattered scroll appeared from thin air, rolling open till it hit the wooden floors. “I wrote a bit of a clear-cut contract, as you can see.”
“My, that doesn’t look very… clear-cut.”
She wasn’t looking at the parchment, though, nor was she regarding any of the nervous gestures he was making towards it. Because if she had been doing either of these things she wouldn’t have been looking towards his torso, eyes traipsing across the sharp curve of his bat wing and up the tousled coat of his brown fur.
Oh. Oh. She had never really done that before.
He used his wings to perform a wry mimicry of a pegasus shrug, trying in turn to shrug off the foreign hotness that bristled his hair. “Most of the content is just… boilerplate nonsense.” Then he arched his serpentine body down to her level, wondering if he could soothe the burning inside his body if he just got her to look elsewhere.
Elsewhere. This close up, their muzzles were mere inches away.
“‘Discord’s Resolution…’,” Reciting the words off the top of his head, he let the teal of her eyes consume him. Harmony was a terribly powerful thing.
He could taste Fluttershy’s breath. She’d had waffles for breakfast, along with something else – perhaps honeyed berries, fresh from her garden grove.
“Discord’s resolution…?” And once again she was prompting him on, reigning in every sentence of his that had wandered off into sheer oblivion.
“Erm, yes, hold on just a second.” His scroll defied the physical laws of aviation and gravitation as it floated right into their line of sight.
Discord didn't think he was the type to get flustered, but at the same time there was this strange sensation inside of him that he only ever got around his favourite mare. The clammy warmth in his chest was part of it, but he also found that he couldn’t focus on any of the letters in front of him, nor could he brush away the blood rush in his cheeks (even with the help of his chaos powers). So he read very slowly, summoning a boot to quietly kick him in the shins – it was a long shot, but maybe he could shoo the nerves and butterflies away?
Hah. Butterflies. And he called himself the spirit of chaos? Seriously?
He began his reading with a whisper, his throat raspier at this register than it normally was. “I, the Lord Of Chaos, Discord of Chaosville, vow to uphold this one simple resolution rigorously, vigorously, meticulously, vociferously, considerably, deliberately, indiscriminately, unconditionally–” He mumbled. “Oh dear, did I really write all of this?”
Fluttershy’s giggle was loud against his skin, the noise sending frissons of excitement down his body.
He followed along the rambling string of adverbs that he couldn’t quite recall writing – had he even written any of it? – till he reached the right part of his ‘contract’. “Ah, yes, here we have it. My resolution.”
Fluttershy shifted so close that her head could’ve easily rested against his body. “And…” She whispered, voice breathy like a springtime breeze. “What would that be, dear Discord?”
“I shall never again endanger Fluttershy dearest … or any of her friends.”
Discord had spent millenia honing his senses. One thousand years as solid rock, to be precise, when there had been nothing else to do in the cold, cruel world. Now, the imperceptibly sharp breath that Fluttershy took was not lost on him. It made him wonder if the feelings inside of her right then were as soft and fuzzy as his were, tender as the premise of hot cocoa, cabin-fever, and a peaceful night in with his favourite mare– creature. And perhaps his hopes were fanciful ones, but could she be feeling a similar intensity in the heat of his fire as he did when he wielded the torch?
It was only when Fluttershy looked up with a frown that he realised two chattering cups of hot chocolate (fully equipped with their own earmuffs and blankets) had materialised above them.
“My sincerest apologies,” He fretted, but as he pulled away from her hoof-hold and extended a languid arm to wave the hot steam away, Fluttershy brought it right back down with a quick tug. She held his wrist like a lifeline.
“I’m afraid you can’t do that. You promised you wouldn’t endanger me again,” she reminded him.
“But I- well I- you – hot chocolate– what?”
She bowed her head sheepishly, rueful scarlet tinging her cheeks once more. “Oh, nevermind – I’m just being silly,” and she dropped his bending arm.
Then he realised what she had, somewhat elusively, been getting at.
His breath stalled. “...Do you mean to say, my precious Fluttershy, that the only way to keep you safe is by keeping you...” He pulled her into a tentative embrace. “This close?”
She trembled, and Discord could hear the harsh palpitations of her heart when it was pressed against his own. Oh, all the most disharmonious forms of affection and all of the sweet heavens above could not compare to this. “M-maybe… a bit closer?”
Oooooh. The air in the room was depleting fast, rinsed out of the cottage like water from a garden hose. Why else would there be dizziness, and brain fog?
“Fluttershy, if I didn’t know you any better I would think you were implying the most scandalous things…” He raised a puckered brow. “Unless, of course, that’s exactly what you’re doing?”
“No! You know me, I would never…would never…” Spluttering, with beads of sweat dripping down her forehead, she sat stock still – like a deer in lights – as Discord wound his sinuous body around hers. The pace of her trembling picked up, and even the tips of her flattened ears were growing rosy.
Half-coiled around his sunny mare, he paused for a moment. Discord didn’t do risque, didn’t play the smitten fool, yet his words could hardly be restrained, “Oh, really? You don’t seem to be very opposed.”
Deflection, at its keenest, succumbed to her: “We’re best friends,” she squeaked. “You know that best friends don’t– don’t normally do these kinds of things.”
Unflinchingly, and carefully, he tucked her mane behind her ears. A chuckle escaped his mouth as he mulled over her words, because Discord knew better. His tremulous paw slid under her chin.
“...Normally?” He mocked. “Why, dear Fluttershy, haven’t you heard the news? Normal is so very last season: the truth is, All is chaos in love and war.” And he tilted her head up high towards the skies, where she would find nothing but his face filling the view.
The portrait of a chaos spirit, who had finally found harmony in one of the precious hearts he’d been designed to undo. And he was sure that she saw constellations behind him, because the twinkle across her face was more glorious than anything he’d ever seen before.
Or… was he the star that burned so brightly in her eyes? He was hesitant to admit the possibility. Discord was a puppeteer of history, after all; a virtuoso in deceit and ugly desires – the furthest thing from cupid that anypony could possibly conceive. So when she placed a hoof on his cheekbone, he was almost half-surprised, and a voice inside of him assured Discord that it must be some terrible mistake. He shut his heavy eyes.
Then Fluttershy closed the gap between them, and in moments everything made sense.
He had never kissed anyone in this way before. Certainly not with this kind of desperate ardour, with one hand grappling for the nape of Fluttershy’s neck as his other supported her precious chin. It was tender passion, and even though it was overflowing he wasn’t going to let a single droplet of his rations spill.
“Mm… Discord,” She crooned, stroking down the bristles of his coat. Leaning into her touch, Discord almost transcended to a plane far above their own, but even this touch did not compare to the softness of her muzzle.
Her muzzle— the way she used it on him, so slow, so ferocious. It brought to mind only clouds and knitted cotton, like something out of a dream, and he decided right then that if she was a dream, he would like to be one too.
His coiled body was far too hot, but body temperature was trivial to the Lord of Romance and Chivalry. Arms wrapping tightly around the pegasus, Discord hoped that Fluttershy’s tongue could brush against his for the rest of eternity; oh,, he hadn’t felt pure, unimpeachable bliss like this since that day she’d first called him her ‘friend’.
It wasn’t long before a few changes came to town, too. Chaos magic had been by Discord’s side for lifetimes (since the genesis of reality, even), but right now there was something not quite right about it. He didn’t want to assume, but he could almost feel it fading away, and that should’ve been… impossible. Disorder was his birthright, discord was his name. And on any other occasion, this situation would’ve led to a crisis, or hysteria, or Celestia only knew what other form of mental unrest.
Right now, though? It was replaced by a revolution, and it was all because of the way Fluttershy kissed him. Something new was brewing inside of him, something he had never experienced before, and tendrils of foreign magic met in secret with only rebellion on their agenda. They scurried behind all of the boarded up back-alleys and spindly staircases of his fragmented mind – and the stairs they met in front of might’ve led to nowhere, but at least nobody was going to look for treason in the crevices of a madman’s mind.
The revolution waged its riots, usurped the king. Then soon the new magic was in the tips of his fingers, and it was a chaos stronger than the cosmos, a madness he could barely keep a hold of.
It strengthened as each slow kiss became quicker, and Discord’s fickle tether to reality grew weaker with each faintly fading breath. There was so much fresh power inside of him ready to be used, and still all he really cared for was to caress his mare with kisses and affection. His silent sorceress. His Fluttershy.
This new chaos felt a lot softer, too… cloudy, and bright. Just like her, he supposed, but also like a pitcher of pink lemonade, adorned with a felicitous number of perfect paper parasols. And he knew that this power would never make sense to him, but it would still be his, and his alone, forever.
With his eyes closed, he couldn’t quite understand why a thick blanket was suddenly wrapping around his neck, or where it had even come from. That was till a preened feather tickled his chin, and he realised the beautiful, pale wings of a pegasus were pulling him in.
He couldn’t understand this. She was Fluttershy, and he was – well, him. Even if she cared for him, even if they were best friends, he was no covetable stallion. His goatee was pearly and old, his voice sang a ballad made of croaky octaves, and his mismatched horns were hardly a stylistic choice.
But she was kissing him back. Despite his jutting snagglefang, and despite his past transgressions and his unruly anatomy, despite his mischief and his madness, she wanted him like no pony ever had. And it didn’t matter how, or why; it only mattered that she did, in this sunkissed room full of unbaked apple-fritters and half-washed morning dishes.
He ran his talon gently through her hair, scratching behind her ears. Her soft voice made an agreeable noise against his tongue, and like a cat who had finally found his way back home, he gently purred in response. He was sure he had never felt this way before, and he was sure that the new chaos magic coalescing inside of him was part of something that went way beyond even his nigh-omniscient comprehension.
In truth, Discord was stupid (dumb as a rock, really) when it came to matters of love. And he’d had a few run-ins with the cursed thing before, but all of those experiences had been cheap mimicries of the real thing, like Flim-Flam brother knock-offs. The ironic thing is that back then he would’ve laughed at the thought of sitting down and rubbing loving circles into a sweet mare’s cheeks, and here he was doing just that.
“Fluttershy,” he whispered against her mouth.
The shiver coming down her withers felt good against his paw, but he couldn’t linger on it. Gingerly, Discord pulled away from her lips and her tongue, trying to fight the persistent pair of hooves that seemed to have other plans in mind.
With a disoriented gasp, he resisted the unexpected strength of her forelegs, but he found unentangling himself very difficult.
Blink. Eyes half-lidded, Fluttershy eventually realised that Discord wasn’t trying to kiss her anymore. Two glitters in her pupils quietly asked ‘why?’, but on the outside her face was expectant. “...Y-yes, my pretty?” She uttered.
Oooh. Had she just called him… oh, her voice… “Fluttershy,” he stammered. “How do you like… erm, stand-up comedy, dear?”
“Ummm…?” She looked at him as if he were, to put it lightly, stark-raving-mad. But Fluttershy knew Discord well enough to tell there was a point he was trying to get across, so gently nuzzling his neck, she replied. “Why, I- I suppose that depends on w-what the jokes are.” And she ran the edge of her hoof along the curve of his jawline, just to remind him that she was patiently waiting to welcome all of his contrived trains of thought, no matter what they were.
He wanted to kiss her again. Instead, he let his ruffled-up paw stroke her all along her body, in particular tracing the preciously unique cutie mark that was imprinted upon her flank.
His face grew hot. “I just need to make sure that if I say something stupid in a moment, I can play it off as a joke. Not that I say stupid things, of course, but sometimes I do stupid things (as we’re well aware), which really is close enough for my point to still stand–”
“I thiiink you might be overthinking this.”
“ – No, not at all! Playing it off as a joke would save me from an eternity of humiliation, although I suppose I just ruined my backup plan by telling you all about it… Oh, deuce. All right. Well, what I’m trying to say, Fluttershy, is that–”
“I'm not quite sure I remember how to speak.”
“Oh, Discord,” She giggled.
“Nopony can make a love confession quite like you.”
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