uhh so my steddie dads 'verse is getting a bit more traction than i thought it would considering i'm just shitposting for my own enjoyment and having the best time y'all's tags have me rolling
anyways my fic plant a seed is the steve-eddie-girldads origin story, for anybody who wanted to see the fam in more of a plot(ish)-based narrative, and it's the final-ish work in this series which goes all the way back to before steve and eddie even start dating, and are still pining pathetically for each other
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so i blinked and suddenly hadn't posted in 6 months? anyhoo this was drafted last summer but by the time it was done graduation season was long gone and this would have made no sense. also - vaguely inspired by a real-life graduation i attended many years ago
The Harrington family is about two-thirds of the way through Moe’s eighth-grade graduation when Eddie leans over to Steve.
“I really thought Moe’d get some kind of academic award,” he says.
“They don’t really do that,” Steve shakes his head, “For morale, or whatever. The high school doesn’t even have a valedictorian.”
Eddie must sit on this for a bit, because it’s a while before he leans back over.
“Okay, but…I dunno. There are about a dozen reasons it took me three tries to finish high school, and I’m reeeeally confident that other kids getting well-earned academic recognition wasn’t one of them.”
“Uh,” Steve hesitates, because this seems like something Eddie could get riled up about if he wanted to, which would then rile up their daughters, and Steve’s not sure he wants to deal with all that today, “We can talk to the school if you want.”
He only suggests it because he knows that Eddie’s interest in talking to the school about anything starts and ends with the annual parent-teacher conferences, and sure enough, he sees Eddie’s nose wrinkle.
“We have one final award to give,” the principal says, “Every year, we give this award to the student who our faculty agrees has truly embodied the values of our school during their three years here.”
“Well, there’s always her high school graduation,” Eddie mutters just loud enough for Steve to hear.
“– Values like taking care of themselves and others, treating peers and faculty alike with empathy –”
Even Robbie is giggling as she semi-whispers, “Moe’s never gonna win that.”
Which – yeah, Steve knows his oldest daughter. She’s kind of a pistol of a kid, honestly, but nice? Steve’s not sure about nice.
She’s definitely not mean, or a bully or anything – Steve is sure about that. He just wouldn’t exactly say that she’s leading with empathy, or whatever the principal had just said.
“– This student has stood out to their teachers for their remarkable compassion for others and for standing by their conscience and by others.”
“Yeah, so Moe’s gonna be sitting this one out,” even Steve can acknowledge.
“It’s an honor to present this award to…” she pauses for suspense, angling herself back just slightly to address the students behind her, and Steve prepares himself for yet another polite round of applause, “Lucy Harrington.”
Steve feels his jaw drop, hears Eddie starting to laugh beside him as they watch Moe walk up to the podium to receive the award.
“Oh my god,” Eddie says, still laughing, “Talk about the damn twilight zone.”
Parents in the general area of the auditorium are shooting them congratulatory looks. Grey’s dad turns in his seat a few rows ahead of them to give them a grin and a thumbs up.
Later, when the ceremony finally ends and everyone is reconvening outside the school, Steve asks Moe, “Did you know you were gonna get that award?”
“Yeah,” Moe shrugged, fiddling with her little cardstock ‘diploma’, “I had to do an interview with, like, the principal and the guidance counselor and whatever.”
“Why–” Eddie starts, and then he stops, and Steve can tell he’s choosing his words carefully, “What made them choose you?”
Moe shrugs again, “I dunno. Something about how I invited the new kids to sit with us at lunch at the beginning of the year, and there was this time some boys were making fun of someone and I told them to stop because, like, that’s so lame. I can’t imagine being so lame and boring and stupid that the only thing I can do to entertain myself is pick on other people. Like, grow up.”
Steve would be the first to admit, it’s a dumb habit.
Something he picked up over a decade ago, when his friendship with Tommy and Carol was still new. He didn’t believe the superstition … but it was hard not to.
“You know apples know who you’re gonna marry,” Carol said over lunch one day.
Steve looked up from his meatloaf. It seemed a little silly to believe, but he believed in love at first sight, so why wouldn’t he believe that apples could hold a truth like that?
Tommy, on the other hand, didn’t believe it. He wrinkled his nose, “No they don’t!”
“Yes they do!” Carol huffed. “My sister told me so. You twist the stem and after each twist, you say a letter of the alphabet, and when it pops off, that’s the first letter of the person’s name you’re gonna marry!”
“That’s not true,” Tommy said. “You’re making that up.”
Carol frowned. “Fine! Don’t believe me.” She picked up her lunch tray and moved tables, sitting next to Heather and Tina.
“That’s totally fake,” Tommy said.
“Right,” Steve agreed.
They sat in silence.
They both picked up their apples, twisting off the stems.
Tommy’s stem came off after three twists.
Steve’s came off after five.
All of fourth grade, Steve tried to figure it out. Could it be Emily or Elizabeth? Eleanor was a grade above him, and Emma was a grade below. He tried to figure it out, maybe even had a playground kiss or two, but nothing came out of his apple stem.
Maybe he did it wrong.
So it became a habit.
Any time he had an apple, he twisted the stem off, quietly reciting the alphabet until it came off.
Eventually, he forgot why he did it. Forgot to keep track of the letter he stopped on before taking a bite.
“Why do you do that?” Robin asked one day at Scoops Ahoy. “The alphabet thing.”
“Oh,” Steve looked at the stem pinched between his fingers. The reason was on the tip of his tongue, but he knew once he said it, Robin would find a reason to add another tally. He took a bite. “I don’t know actually.”
Robin frowned. “Don’t talk with your mouth full, caveman.”
Steve shrugged his shoulders, taking another bite of his apple. Robin dropped it, never asking Steve again.
But after Starcourt “burned” down, Robin picked up the habit too.
Reciting the alphabet as she twisted off the stem. She’d make it halfway through the alphabet before her stem would come off.
Steve’s stems never held on that strong.
Steve twisted the stem of his Granny Smith apple, the alphabet barely a whisper as the stem fell off.
“Is there a rhyme or reason for that?” Eddie asked. “Removing the stem like that?”
“Nope,” Robin said as she threw her stem towards Eddie. “It’s like playing with your food before you eat it.”
“With letters?” Eddie asked.
“Yeah,” Robin said. “I got to N. Steve hardly ever gets past E.”
Steve’s head shot up.
E.
It’s such a habit, he didn’t realize what letter he stopped on.
He turned to face Eddie and —
Yeah.
That felt right.
Eddie felt right.
“It’s a soulmate thing,” Steve blurted out, not realizing he was interrupting whatever conversation Robin and Eddie were having. “A — soulmate. Yeah. You — uh — twist the stem. And whatever letter you land on is the person you’re supposed to marry.”
The three of them sat in silence, the stem pinched between Steve’s fingers as the center point of attention.
He lifted it up for emphasis.
“E,” he said. “It landed on E. Always landed on E.”
Eddie’s expression was unreadable.
Maybe, Steve was wrong —
Eddie leaped halfway onto the kitchen island, yanking an apple from the fruit center piece and started to twist the stem.
“What are you doing?” Robin asked, exasperated by his antics. “Did you just miss what Steve said?”
“Yes Robin, I heard exactly what he said.”
Robin wrinkled her brow.
“Shouldn’t you be jumping for joy? Or you know, kissing him?”
Eddie raised the apple in his hands. “I gotta get to the letter S, give me a second.”
Steve found himself grinning over Eddie. A silly habit of picking apple stems actually paid off.
Omg please elaborate on Robbie figuring out she’s not the baby anymore I can only imagine the chaos
ooooh yeah it was not the most pleasant transition
i think steve in particular has a lot of dad-guilt over it, actually (even though it’s not really anyone’s fault). he mostly feels bad because, like, he knows there are ways to prepare kids to become older siblings. they had 3-ish months to prepare moe for the idea of being a big sister – they talked about it with her all the time and involved her in things like getting the baby’s room set up and modeled things with baby dolls. there was even a sibling class at a community center they had planned to take her to (didn’t end up making it, since robbie was born a full month earlier than expected, but still, they’d planned to take her). so moe was all excited when robbie was born and loved the shit out of her baby sister.
since even steve and eddie only got a few hours notice before they met hazel, robbie unfortunately did not get the same advanced preparation, and so she has the completely natural and expected not-so-great reaction to it all.
it could have been worse, steve honestly believes.
at the beginning, it’s a lot of “when the baby is gone, [insert toddler-esque ramblings here]” which usually has steve and eddie side-eyeing each other. there’s also the “can she sleep in the basement if she’s gonna be so loud?”, but otherwise robbie just tries her best to pretend hazel doesn’t exist, which is kind of a bummer, but, again, it could have been worse.
things do turn around after a while, when hazel's a little more alert and responds more to her sisters (and the moment they realized they'd fully turned the corner was when robbie asked to bring hazel into preschool for show-and-tell)
Hazel posts a tiktok that starts with her saying to the camera, “Okay, we’re trying to figure out a way to prank our dads, and Moe says she has an idea.”
She tilts her phone a bit so Moe comes into frame next to Robbie.
“I could tell them I broke up with Gray,” she shrugs.
Robbie and Hazel both go still in tandem.
“Damn,” Robbie says, “They’d be so fucking sad.”
“You didn’t though, right?” Hazel asks.
“No,” Moe rolls her eyes, "They're literally on the train here right now."
The video cuts to a shaky, half-blurred view of the living room. Hazel is clearly trying to hide her phone, so Steve and Eddie are barely in frame, and Moe is out of the shot entirely.
“Okay, um, I need to tell you something,” Moe starts, “And, like…I probably should get it over with so it doesn’t, like, ruin the holidays or whatever.”
Steve and Eddie glance at each other.
“Everything okay?” Eddie asks cautiously.
“Yeah. No, it’ll be fine,” Moe nods, “Just. Okay, yeah, so…last week me and Gray broke up.”
Steve and Eddie visibly deflate, glancing at each other.
"Shit, Moe," Steve says, trying and failing to school a somewhat devastated expression, "That's...that's really sad to hear, hon. Are you alright?"
Mod nods again, "Yeah. Just processing, I guess."
"Do you wanna talk about it at all?"
She shrugs, "I don't think there's really a lot to talk abou–"
“Can you fix it?” Eddie interrupts.
Moe’s eyebrows fly up, “Can I fix it? Oh, that’s real nice, Dad. Tell me how you really feel.”
“That’s not–”
“Wait, so where’s Gray now?” Steve interrupts, “New York still?”
“Yeah,” Moe nods.
“Oh, c’mon, Moe. They’re gonna be there alone? For Christmas? Weren’t they planning on coming here?”
“Uh, I mean…”
“Well, they can still come here, right? Like, I get that you’re not – I mean, I don’t, actually. I don't get it, but–"
The tiktok cuts again to a shot of Steve hugging Gray so. tight. in the entryway – Gray clearly isn’t even all the way through the front door yet.
Moe, side-eying them: Jeez, okay, I guess I know who’d win Pop in the divorce.
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For Steve and Eddie, the ‘magic’ of having little kids in the house during Christmastime is well and truly a thing of the past by the time the 2020s roll around.
Sure, it's a little disappointing, especially since Steve had loved how excited their daughters got during the holiday season, had loved making that magic happen for them. It was a shit-ton of work for him and Eddie, but god, was it worth it.
Maybe bittersweet is a better word than disappointing, since Steve still loves the alternative, loves how happy their kids are to be home for the holidays, even their older two who've been away at college since the summer.
They even made a game night happen after their Christmas Eve dinner – a family-favorite trivia game followed by a heated Hearts match (which Moe brutally destroyed them at, as she tends to). Now, the cards have been put away and the family is scattered around the living room, an old animated Christmas movie playing low on the TV while they all idly chat with each other.
Hazel is sitting on the floor in front of Moe’s usual spot on the couch getting her hair braided.
“How do you even know how to do this?” Hazel asks her, “Your hair’s never been long enough to braid.”
“Basketball,” Moe replies, “I was team braider.”
“And she used to always ask to practice on me back then,” Gray comments from where they’re lying on the carpet petting the cats.
The implication hidden in Gray’s statement goes unspoken, but Steve glances over at Moe to see a hint of a blush on her face.
Robbie and Eddie are bickering – or about to be bickering, maybe. Robbie had squashed herself into Eddie’s armchair to show him some videos she’d taken during the last few weeks of fall semester – she and some of her buddies apparently have been reworking rock songs using classical instruments, and Eddie’s been getting a kick out of seeing the footage.
They’re done with that though, and moving on to the aforementioned bickering about Christmas morning – apparently, Eddie is concerned about how Robbie’s atrocious sleep schedule (she’s basically nocturnal) will affect their Christmas morning routine
“Darling, I just want to make sure my expectations are reasonable. You haven’t been awake for an AM that started with anything higher than three the whole time you’ve been home. If I wake up at the crack of dawn to put the cinnamon rolls in the oven and then you don’t get up for another five hours, I’m gonna be pissed. You know those things suck after they go cold.”
“I’ll get up,” Robbie insists, “It’s Christmas.”
“Okay, you say that now, but how’s that gonna work? It’s eight o’clock now and you’ve only been up for a few hours. You planning on taking, like, six benadryl and crashing at eleven with the rest of us?”
“Don’t do that,” Steve finds himself cutting in.
Robbie gives him a look.
“Duh,” she says, “That’s what melatonin is for.”
“You shouldn’t take that either. Y’know, your circadian rhy–”
And Steve can’t even finish his sentence before the explosion of mockery begins.
*16 HOURS LATER*
Robbie: *trudges downstairs at 12pm*
Eddie: Welcome to the land of the living, princess
Does Eddie and Steve ever really get into a BIG fight?
I kmow they are trying to their best to communicate well and with respect(and I dont think it would be like divorce worthy fight)
But i just think it be interesting to see how you would write the dynamic of a fight in their very loving relationship
it’s actually funny you ask this bc i’m drafting something rn (not for this ‘verse) that involves a massive blow-up argument between steve and eddie and I’m having SUCH a hard time writing it, so tbh i’m not sure i could pull off any kind of argument scene at the mo’ BUT
I do think there’s a period of time where Steve and Eddie are in a bit of a rough patch – kind of. It’s not so much about the dynamic between them and more about outside circumstances taking a toll on them individually and, in turn, together.
that period of time is the ~eight months between Hazel’s birth and her adoption.
They got approximately two hours' notice that Hazel even existed before all of a sudden she was handed over to them, and while, yes, they adore her and are so excited to have another little baby to dote on forever, Steve still has a really, really hard time with the transition their family goes through in the aftermath of such a massive and unexpected change.
Eddie does not.
Eddie actually doesn’t relate to the stress of it at all, and thinks that life is always gonna be filled with unexpected changes and you just have to take what comes.
Steve doesn’t think Eddie’s taking things seriously enough.
Eddie thinks Steve’s gotta lower his expectations, especially with three kids under the age of six.
Steve thinks it’s actually pretty reasonable to expect his husband – and children’s father – to know their schedule of adoption hearings and to not get himself double-booked.
Eddie wonders if Steve forgot that he axed three-quarters of his book tour when they found out Hazel was born specifically so he could stay local, but he still has obligations and so maybe Steve should cut him some slack – plus the double-booked thing only happened once, and the judge was fine with it because he knows them from the two other times they’ve done this, so maybe they can relax a little.
Steve can’t believe Eddie would even consider being “relaxed” about something as important as the adoption of their daughter.
Eddie thinks Steve is purposely missing the point he’s trying to make.
So, yeah, not super productive. They’re both fighting for the same thing, just……in ways that kind of put each other under even more stress, unfortunately.
They get through it, obviously, it just takes some time.
Psych major Steve and his extensive knowledge of child development and understanding Moe will be okay even if she cries a little versus Eddie’s… being Eddie
HA yeah this is their dynamic 100%
Also, this with crib-training especially - Steve's all over Eddie's case about making sure she's napping in her crib (to lay the groundwork for sleep-training or whatever).
He calls around nap-time like:
Steve: Hey, love you. She went down okay?
Eddie: Yep. Just peachy.
Steve: In her crib?
Eddie: .......Yep.
Steve: You fuckin' liar.
Steve's a total hypocrite though because there's basically a 100% chance that when Moe's "bedtime" rolls around, she and Steve will be dozing off on the couch together, no crib in sight.
They don't even bother with any of it by the time Hazel is born. There's a good chance she didn't sleep anywhere other than someone's arms for the first entire year of her life.
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Eight years into parenthood, the state of Steve and Eddie’s sex life is…well, it’s just about what anyone would imagine for people eight years into parenthood, Eddie’s pretty sure.
It’s certainly not the wild, loud, spontaneous shit they got up to when they were younger. It’s a hell of a lot more calculated than that, planned, quicker and quieter – unless there’s a rare opportunity alone in the house, but most nights they’re just collapsing into bed, too exhausted to do anything more than cuddle for a bit, hands slipped under t-shirts and into hair, nails dragging idly over skin as they talk about their days for a while.
Today though…Eddie’s got a good feeling about today.
Steve was home early today, and with the holidays only a week or so away, all the girls’ fall activities – sports and music and art classes and all that enriching shit – are either done for the season or on a break until the New Year, so they’ve got no places to be, nothing rushing their evening of helping with homework and making dinner and playing with the girls for a while to tucker them out.
(They’ve been into this game lately, sort of a three-on-one spin on bowling where Steve sits behind the pins and blocks their little novelty rubber balls – it’s taken on a dodge-ball-like twist recently, ever since the girls figured out they could just pelt Steve with the balls instead of aiming for the pins).
In all the in-between moments, Steve’s been all over him – leaning in close, hot breath hitting Eddie’s neck, to tell him some school pick-up gossip he’d heard earlier, tucking fingers into his back pockets or the waistband of his jeans while they wait for a pot of water to boil, tapping his foot against Eddie’s under the dinner table as they listen to their daughters talk about what's going on in their worlds.
Sure, Steve’s usually a touchy guy, but there was something different in the air tonight.
So, yeah. Good feeling.
Here’s the deal – Eddie forgot about one thing.
Friggin bedtime.
Eddie really thought, with two-thirds of his children firmly in elementary school, bedtimes might not feel so much like a goddamn Olympic sport, and to their credit, the older two – six- and eight-year olds Robbie and Moe, who are typically their troublemakers during daylight hours – have been asleep for hours by now, even factoring in all their duplicitous asks for water and more bedtime stories.
Hazel, though…
Hazel, their sweet angel baby who couldn’t hurt a fly, has never done a thing wrong in her life, has been up hours now past her bedtime.
It’s past his and Steve’s bedtime at this point, and yet Eddie can hear the way Hazel is chit-chatting away at a more and more beleaguered Steve as he tries to make his way through his own evening routine.
Suffice it to say, that good feeling is floating further and further out of reach.
“It’s time for bed, Haze,” Eddie hears Steve insist as gently as possible from the upstairs hall, “How can I help you here, babe? Staying up’s not an option anymore.”
“I just need snuggles,” Hazel says.
“You need snuggles?” Steve repeats, “You think you could go to sleep after some snuggles?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Okay, wanna go to your room and get all tucked in?”
“No,” she says as she wanders through Steve and Eddie’s open doorway, “I wanna snuggle in your bed.”
Aaaaaand there it is.
The final nail in the coffin.
Eddie watches as Steve’s shoulders slump just a little.
“Okay,” he says, “Alright, get on in.”
Hazel scrambles up onto the bed and pulls herself into Eddie’s lap.
“Love you,” she says with that sweet smile of hers, and god, there’s no way in hell Eddie could stay annoyed with that face, with those little hands tip-tapping on his shoulders.
“Love you too, sweetheart,” he tells her, pulling her in even close so she can curl up in his arms.
“Careful,” Steve warns, but he’s got a fond smile on his face as he leans against the doorframe, “That’s how she gets you.”
Eddie ignores him.
“Want me to tell you a story?” he asks her, and Hazel nods.
Steve heads back for the stairs, mumbling something about needing to turn out all the lights, and Eddie has barely managed to set the scene on an inter-kingdom fairy-cat political conflict before he's noticing how heavy Hazel has gone in his arms, how her mouth is drooping open a little like she’s about to start snoring (and she probably is).
By the time Steve returns, Hazel is fully conked out (and snoring a little). Eddie brushes a stray curl out of her face because, yeah, despite his annoyance that the evening wasn’t ending how he’d originally thought it would, he’s still relishing in how one of their babies is still little enough to fall asleep in his arms, the other two too grown up for that kind of thing (alright, Ed, don't be dramatic, Eddie can practically hear Steve's response to that though, Moe's not even nine yet).
“God, you should’a tried that three hours ago,” Steve whispers.
“Dude, I did,” Eddie hisses in protest, “I read her, like, four before you tapped me out.”
Steve hums sympathetically as he glances towards the bathroom door.
“Hey, uh, I still gotta take a shower. You?”
“Nah, have at it. I got one in earlier.”
“No – Ed,” Steve says, hands pressed into the mattress as he leans in a little closer, “Did you want. To take. A shower.”
And – yep, Eddie’s caught up now.
“Oh, got it-got it-got it. Yep, gotta do that. And, y'know, good for the the water bill.”
“And we know how much you care about the water bill.”
Do you ever think Eddie somehow ends up telling the girls about his drug dealing past? I know that in your universe him and Steve dont put their troubled past onto them willingly (weird way i worded it but I hope you get the point) But I think itd be funny and like a super important moment in the girls life if Eddie sat them down and talked to them about drugs and everything it comes with it. Maybe once they caught Robbie with a vape pen or maybe one of them came home high (which I highly doubt in Hazels case but you know)
Just some food for thought because im really interested to know!
oooh okay i love this question
i think in Steve and Eddie's eyes, "troubled past" falls into two camps:
dumb shit that they did as teenagers and survived and were fine and know as adults was normal behavior that most teens do but would reeeaaallly rather their kids not do as well
actual trauma (upside down-related and otherwise) that will stick with them for the rest of their lives
They try to keep both #1 & #2 from their daughters as much as possible, but for two totally different reasons.
#2 is easy -- they do not want to put their trauma onto their children to a point where it's actually a main tenet of their parenthood philosophy. Like, Steve knows that no matter how much he processes things, no matter how much work he does, his relationship with his father is always going to be something that screwed him up. He also knows he's not going to repeat that cycle again.
#1 is a little more complicated, in part because they're aware that telling their kids to stay away from drugs/alcohol and to not sneak out and to be careful who they're going to parties with is incredibly ironic coming from two people who happily did that exact same shit when they were teenagers themselves.
Mostly though, I think Steve is aware that there's a good chance their teen-aged children would hear those kinds of stories and, rather than hearing a cautionary tale of "I did this very risky thing at your age and now with a grown-up perspective I see now how lucky I was that it didn't go as badly as it reasonably could, so I don't want you to go down the same path", instead they'll just hear "my dad did this 'illicit' thing when he was my age and he's a normal, well-functioning, successful adult so what's the problem if i do the same thing". I think Eddie tends to follow Steve's lead in basically everything regarding parenthood, so even if he would be mostly down to talk to the girls' about the shit he got up to at their age, he keeps his mouth shut (or he just lies -- seriously, there's a lot of lying involved, esp when the girls are teenagers).
So conversations usually go like this:
You're telling me you never got drunk even once in high school?" Robbie protests (she's grounded for getting drunk at a friend's house and then lying about it -- the lying part is the bit they're most upset about)
"Correct," Steve replies (he's lying, like a hypocrite).
"You're so boring," Robbie says.
"Right you are, daughter o' mine," Eddie grins, "And you and me are like two peas, so trust me when I say there'll come a day when boring feels like a goddamn dream come true."
(In true "dad" fashion, they start nonchalantly sprinkling in lore when the girls hit their twenties and they go insane over it every time).
heyyy so i know imitation is the purest form of flattery or whatever but maybe don’t re-package my fics (or put them through ai or whatever these people are doing) and post them like you had anything to do with it? maybe?
Actually. I wasn't going to post the plagiarized work bc I assume a child is the one behind the AO3 account and I don't want to make this a bigger situation than it is, but the more I think about it, what the fuck is the fucking point of posting on AO3 if you're just copy-pasting someone else's work? What are you getting out of it? Attention? I don't get it. I and presumably everyone else who participates in fandom creates their art because it's fun and rewarding and cathartic sometimes, and being part of a community like this is just such a lovely experience, so I don't understand what someone gets out of it when their only contribution is a rip-off of someone else's work.
Anyways, this is the user that yoinked my fic sunflower in the evening off of ao3, spun a few details around, and posted it right back on ao3.
one of the wonderful people who flagged the copied work to me pointed out that the user may have ripped other works from ao3/tumblr as well, so ig let this serve as an opportunity for other writers/artists/etc. to keep an eye out bc unfortunately it's really easy for people to do this and I would have had no idea had someone not sent it to me.
also i know i've been quiet recently — i'm aaaaalmost done with the sweater i've been frantically knitting for my company's holiday party tomorrow. once that's done it's all over for you people you're gonna get so tired of me :)
heyyy so i know imitation is the purest form of flattery or whatever but maybe don’t re-package my fics (or put them through ai or whatever these people are doing) and post them like you had anything to do with it? maybe?
Steve Harrington was trying to be a better person, but one night in late August, despite his best efforts, he had a truly selfish thought. He wished Robin wasn't dating Vickie. He hated himself for even entertaining the idea. Robin deserved to be with someone who loved her. She was amazing. She was smart, funny, and a little bit of a weirdo– which Steve had learnt was his type.
He wasn't jealous of Vickie. Not in the way you'd think. He was over being in love with Robin, but he missed having his best friend around. For so long, he and Robin had been joined at the hip. Now Robin had Vickie, which meant he saw less and less of her.
Whenever he tried to strike up a conversation with Nancy, she'd look at him like he'd sprouted a third head. Maybe she thought he was flirting, which wasn't ideal. Talking to Jonathan was a nonstarter because he thought Steve was still trying to get together with Nancy.
Then there was Dustin. Before, when he'd had no one else, he'd had Dustin to talk to. Was it depressing that one of his best friends was several years his junior? Yes, but Steve would take what he could get. The problem was that Dustin had changed since Eddie's death. Most days, he wouldn't look at Steve, let alone talk to him. Which meant, once again, Steve Harrington was alone.
When the silence of his empty house grew too loud, Steve would drive around town. The quarantine zone was one of the many prisons his life held. In years past, he could've hit the road until he reached Indianapolis, but now he looped around the town's perimeter until his fuel light blinked or the night faded into morning.
He was so damn lonely. There was also the matter of going crazy.
Steve was hearing voices on the radio. More specifically, one voice on the radio, Eddie Munson's. The first time it happened, he and Dustin had been in the WSQK van, on a crawl, slowly following Hopper's trail in the Upside Down, topside. Amongst Hopper's garbled voice and static, another sound rose from the din.
"Hello? Anyone?" The voice– Eddie's voice, sounded hoarse, as though he'd been calling out for some time.
Naturally, Steve looked to Henderson, expecting to see the kid as frantic as he felt, but he wore his usual bored and despondent look as he mindlessly turned the knobs and dials.
"Henderson, you hear that?"
This was it. The moment Steve finally lost his mind. With all the shit he'd seen, he supposed it was about time.
"Hopper trying to get through on the walkie? Yes, Steve. I do, and I'd be able to pick up the signal better if you'd speed up a little."
"Yeah, but what about...?" Steve let his thought fade. He was tired. He hadn't been sleeping well. He was dreaming with his eyes open.
Only Steve kept hearing the voice. Not just on their crawls but on his late-night drives in the Beamer. The Squawk went off air after ten, which meant the station played nothing but static, and through that static, Steve started hearing Eddie. That night in August, Steve went crazy enough to start answering.
"Hello?" Eddie's voice croaked through the static. He sounded as tired as Steve felt.
"Anyone? Ground control to Major Tom? This is E.T. phoning home." Despite everything, Eddie could still joke.
Steve liked to think that, in another life, they could have been friends. Maybe that was why his sleep-addled brain had conjured up Eddie's voice from the ether.
"Hey... uh, Major Tom to ground control?" Steve spoke to the air as he took a tight turn down the end of a quiet neighbourhood.
In another life, Steve would like to live in a comfortably quiet home. His house screamed with the silence of abandonment, instead of sleeping with tranquillity. There was a difference between quiet and silence, not many people knew.
For a moment, there was nothing but static, but then it was shattered by what sounded like the gasp of a wounded animal.
Steve had to jerk the wheel as he felt himself driving dangerously close to the curb. He pulled over, but left the car running.
"Live and in stereo. Jesus H. You don't know how happy I am to hear your voice."
Steve might be feeding his own delusions, but god, it felt good to be wanted, just once.
"I could say the same about you. Where are you?"
"I'm stuck in the damn Upside Down, man. Have been for... I don't know how long. I've been running around this goddamn hellscape, hiding from the demogorgons for... I don't know."
Steve leaned back against the headrest and let his eyes fall shut, trying to focus.
"Sixteen months, give or take," Steve breathed. God, he'd been gone so long. This couldn't be real. Eddie had died. Steve had watched him die.
"No... no that can't be right. It can't. It hasn't..." Eddie's voice trailed off, appearing confused.
"I'm sorry... Eddie– Eds, you died." Steve had hoped his sick mind would send him a friend, but instead it sent him a therapy session.
"I tried to save you, man. By the time I got there... there was so much blood–." Steve was glad he'd parked, because he could feel his hands begin to shake.
Watching someone die never leaves you. Steve could close his eyes, and he was back there. Part of him would always be there. He'd heard Dustin's wails of anguish before he'd seen the grusome scene. He knew something had gone terribly wrong.
He'd run until he felt as though his lungs would explode. He'd been so focused on Dustin at first, he hadn't noticed Eddie. He'd taken the boy's bloody face between his hands and tried to examine every inch of him to determine where the blood was coming from. Dustin pushed him away, sobbing Eddie's name. Eddie had been so still that Steve had thought he was already gone. However, he placed the back of his hand inches from Eddie's lips and felt small puffs of air.
The flesh at his sides had been torn beyond recognition, resembling minced meat, instead of flesh and bone. Steve had done his best to pack the wound. He'd been wrist deep inside Eddie's skin. He'd never forget the warm flow of blood around his fingers as he tried to feed Eddie's intestines back inside his body. He'd never un-hear the wet squelch of flesh on flesh. He'd tried his best to save Eddie. Logically, he knew that. But he never felt like he'd done enough.
He remembered struggling to hold Eddie in his arms, as they made for the gate out of The Upside Down. All the blood made him slippery. Steve had toppled over, desperately trying to cling to Eddie rather than letting him go. He'd skinned his knees, his hands and his chin. It'd taken Steve four tries to hoist Eddie up through the hole in the trailer roof, with Dustin hot on his heels.
By the time Eddie's body was in Hawkins, his eyes were glassy, and he'd stopped breathing. Even then, Steve had tried. He scraped together all the knowledge he'd gathered from his first job as a lifeguard during his sophomore year and beat down on Eddie's chest until his wrist ached and he was covered in sweat. Nothing brought him back, but god, he'd tried.
"I died," Eddie echoed at last. Steve thought he heard a hint of disbelief in his tone.
"But I'm... here," Eddie sounded as lost as Steve felt.
"I'm sorry," Steve breathed. Unsure what else he was supposed to say.
"Oh shit," Eddie's voice crackled through the static, sounding suddenly distant.
"Creepy demodogs are hot on my six, Steve. I've gotta move. Find me again. I don't know how you did it but–." The radio static swallowed Eddie's voice whole.
Once again, Steve was alone.
After being directionless for so long, Steve threw himself headlong into finding and contacting Eddie. Any spare moment was spent combing every inch of Hawkins, with the radio tuned to static if he was driving or his walkie-talkie fixed to his and Eddie's private channel if he was on foot.
He wasn't sure if he was going crazy, but the alternative was worse. If he wasn't crazy, that meant part of Eddie had survived, only to be trapped in an evil wizard's hell dimension. Steve Harrington wasn't in the business of leaving his people behind. He had to bring Eddie home.
In the weeks that followed, he and Eddie had come closer to understanding how to contact each other. Much like Hopper's walkie and the Squawk van, Eddie and Steve needed to be close to one another to talk. At first, that seemed to make matters simple. If Eddie camped out at Steve's house in The Upside Down and Steve turned on his walkie, they could talk for hours on end, which they did. However, the Upside Down was still crawling with demogorgons, meaning it wasn't safe to stay in one place too long, lest Eddie get cornered. Neither boy wanted to know what would happen if he died twice.
They organised nightly meet-ups across Hawkins, trying to keep Eddie on the move. All the while, Steve was trying to work out how to get back into the Upside Down to get Eddie out without the military or the other members of the party realising. He hadn't intended to keep Eddie's possible return from the dead from the others, but everything felt so complicated. There were too many variables, too many things to go wrong. Losing Eddie once had broken Dustin in ways Steve feared he would never mend from. He didn't dare think what would happen if they couldn't save Eddie a second time. To Steve's surprise, Eddie agreed. Neither boy would admit it, but they both knew how unlikely it was that they'd be able to get Eddie out.
"Where should we swing by tomorrow? I was thinking maybe we could hang out at Enzo's parking lot," Eddie's voice rose from the static.
It was mid-September, and the boys had grown close in such a short time. Steve had been surprised at how easy they had bonded in the days after Eddie was accused of murder. Eddie knew what he was going to say before Steve did, particularly regarding Dustin, and, much to Steve's surprise, he could read Eddie's moods without the man saying a word. It was a bond he'd shared with Robin, but that had taken months of working a minimum wage job together, coupled with being drugged and tortured, not to mention Robin coming out to him.
He and Eddie didn't have as much shared history. They hardly talked in high school. Steve didn't know how to explain it. He felt like a part of him had always known Eddie. Even when they had been strangers, Eddie had caught Steve's eye at his parties and across the cafeteria. His long hair, denim vest and ringed fingers always managed to snag Steve's attention, like a hangnail in a knitted sweater.
He thought, for a moment, of Robin's bathroom confession, how much she'd noticed about him, because of her crush on Tammy Thompson. Steve had always noticed Eddie, but not because he was popular with any of the girls he'd half-heartedly dated. Steve had spent a long time trying to unpack what all that meant for him.
After Eddie's death, he'd never admit how much he mourned what could have been. He felt like they were getting a second chance, and he wasn't about to let it go to waste. If it were anyone else, Steve would've worried he'd come on too strong, as was his habit, but to his surprise, for each part of himself he overshared, Eddie did so in kind.
Steve supposed it was bound to happen. Eddie had been alone for months. He needed someone. Steve had been lonely for... years, really. They both needed one another.
It was one of the lucky nights, they'd been able to meet at his home. His late nights and early mornings hunting for Eddie meant his sleep schedule was nonexistent, so getting to curl up in his bed with the walkie by his head as he talked to Eddie felt like a small luxury. He wondered if Eddie was in the same place in the Upside Down, curled up on top of the covers, in Steve's bed. The thought made him shiver. He was trying not to dwell on all the feelings Eddie spurred in him. It was too complex.
"You want to take me to Enzo's?" Steve mused, propping his arm behind his head.
"I figured you're a class act, Harrington. If we're going to meet in a parking lot under the cover of darkness, it might as well be one worthy of your standing," Eddie replied, making Steve roll his eyes.
"I've got another idea," Steve began.
"This morning, I drove close enough to the military base to pick up on their internal radio chatter. Turns out, they're doing a burn tomorrow night at the break near Forest Hills. The rest of the gang hasn't picked up on it yet. Thought we could try meeting up in your neck of the woods," Steve proposed.
"By my neck of the woods, you mean The Upside Down? Don't you think it's a little dangerous sneaking past the military on your own?" Eddie was hesitant, but he wasn't saying no.
"It's only dangerous if you get caught, and I know how to be sneaky," Steve argued and heard a faint snicker.
"Just because you say you'd make a good ninja dude, doesn't mean I believe you."
"I'm not hearing a no," Steve challenged.
"That's because, as dumb as your idea sounds... I really want to see someone that's not shaped like a hell-bat or a fly trap. You're playing on my weakness, Stevie," Eddie spoke. Steve felt a smile creep over his lips.
"So it's settled, I'll meet you there tomorrow night. If everything goes well, I might be able to get you topside by breakfast."
Steve knew he was being optimistic. When he had outlined the areas the military frequently burned to Eddie, the boy had tried to sneak past them and cross the barrier to Hawkins, but so far, he hadn't been successful. Something was keeping Eddie tethered there. They were entertaining a handful of theories, with no real evidence to support them.
"Okay, Stevie. Just be careful. If it's too dangerous, turn back. Don't play the hero," Eddie said, and it hurt to have his own words echoed back at him.
"I thought that was my job," Steve mumbled.
"No. Not today it's not. No more heroes," Eddie insisted.
"No more heroes," Steve echoed, gazing up at the ceiling, imagining Eddie beside him, doing the same.
"If we get you out of there, I'll actually take you to Enzo's... if you want," Steve whispered.
For a moment, he'd felt brave, but the second the words left his lips, he was terrified. Maybe he'd read Eddie all wrong.
He heard Eddie laugh. Which hurt more than it should.
"You know that's a date place, right? I know you're rich and all, but I couldn't imagine you and Tommy H swinging by for a candle-lit dinner after a basketball game."
"I know it's a date place," Steve tried again.
"That's why I asked you."
The silence that followed seemed to stretch out for a lifetime before Eddie uttered a quiet 'oh'.
"Yeah... Stevie. If everything goes as planned, I'll go to Enzo's with you."
Getting away from the radio station on time to meet Eddie was harder than Steve anticipated. He was halfway out the door when Robin called his name and jogged to catch up with him.
"Dingus. Vickie just called, and she's picking up a double shift at the hospital. Which means my Friday night is officially free. Want to have a movie night? Last week, Murray smuggled us some new tapes I've been dying to watch."
On any other night, Steve would've jumped at the opportunity to spend time with Robin, but not tonight. The only problem was, he hadn't had time to come up with a convincing lie.
"Ah, you see, I'd love to, but I've got... plans tonight," Steve tried. It was way too vague. Robin wouldn't buy it.
"I've got a date," Steve corrected.
"Since when do you not tell me about your dates? I could literally name every girl you've slept with... probably ever. Which is very gross, and slightly codependent– but not the point." Shit. Robin had a point.
"I forgot about it. No big deal. You just reminded me." Steve hated lying to Robin. He wasn't good at lying to Robin.
"No, you didn't. You've checked your watch five times in the last hour. That's only something you do when you know you've got to be somewhere," Robin argued.
Lie better, Harrington. Steve thought. He needed to meet up with Eddie. If he didn't do it that night, he had no idea when the next opportunity would present itself.
"It's with a guy," Steve blurted out.
It was uncomfortably close to the truth, and in retrospect, he was surprised he hadn't talked to Robin about his burgeoning sexuality crisis sooner. He hadn't wanted to. If he said it out loud, it would make it real.
Instead of saying anything in reply, Robin pulled him into a bone-crushing hug that knocked the air from his lungs. For a moment, he stiffened before sinking in. It'd been a long time since someone had held him. It was a shock to the system.
"I'm sorry,' She muttered against Steve's shoulder, surprising him. What did she have to feel sorry for?
"I shouldn't have pushed you. If you're not ready to come out, that's okay. This conversation never happened. Look, I've already forgotten about it. You can tell me again in a month or a year. Or never. Never is okay, too. A little unhealthy, but okay... You should talk to someone about it at some stage, though," Robin rambled, her words tumbled over one another, as they did when she was nervous.
"It's okay. I wanted to talk to you about it, I just..." Steve didn't know how to explain, but he didn't have to. Robin was nodding enthusiastically.
"It's hard to say it sometimes."
"I don't know if I've even said it to myself yet," Steve admitted.
Robin squeezed his shoulder hard before letting him go.
"It's okay. Sometimes it takes time. No rush," She assured before a dark look crossed her face.
"This guy, is he nice?" Steve wanted to laugh.
"No, Rob, he's an asshole. What do you think?" He placed a hand on his hip and cocked his brow.
"Honestly, Steve? With your track record with girls, I've got no idea. When it comes to your love life, you're Mr Self-Sabotage."
"He's nice," Steve said.
He wasn't sure if the general population of Hawkins would agree that Eddie 'The Freak' Munson was nice, but Hawkins didn't know Eddie. He collected lost and broken things. He made sure no one ever felt left out, no matter how strange they were. He opened doors for people. He made Steve feel like a person, for the first time in a long time.
"Do I know him?" Robin asked.
"Remember when you said I shouldn't out people?" Steve asked, side-stepping the question. Saying he was going on a date with a guy was one thing; dating long-dead Eddie Munson was something else entirely.
"Okay. Fine. You're right. But I'm here if you do need to talk about it," Robin promised, and Steve nodded, looking down at his watch. He was so late. He hoped they hadn't started the burn yet.
"Alright, Lover boy. I won't keep you any longer. Have a good date. I'll be expecting all the gory details tomorrow."
Steve snorted and waved her off.
Steve Harrington was reckless, but sometimes, being reckless paid off.
Steve tried to recall everything Hopper had told them about his previous crawls. He'd followed close to one of the military trucks, hitching a ride on the back when the coast was clear. Though if Hopper got caught, he had an arsenal of guns. All Steve had was a poorly fashioned nail bat, a flask of kerosene and a lighter.
As the terrain became marred with sparsely populated trees, Steve jumped and rolled for cover. From there, he waited for the military to leave, then set about trying to find Eddie. Unfortunately, something else found him first.
A demodog lurched from the shadows, knocking Steve from his feet. In a heartbeat, he scrambled upright, swinging the bat and landing a solid blow to the creature's side. He was winding up for a second hit when something encircled his wrist. He looked to see Eddie, stilling his hand and urging him with a violent tug to run. You didn't have to tell Steve twice.
The two boys ran side-by-side, keeping pace with each other's matching strides. It became a rhythm, the crunch of dirt underfoot at Steve's side and to his back. The demodog continued to pursue for several miles. They didn't stop until long after the creature had disappeared from view.
Finally, Eddie stopped running, and the boys doubled over, sucking gasping lungfuls of spore-filled air. Steve had hardly caught his breath when Eddie barrelled into him, knocking him off his feet and surprising him with a tight and desperate hug.
"God Stevie, you're a sight for sore eyes," Eddie mumbled, sounding far less winded than Steve felt. He wondered how much of Eddie's day was spent running from monsters.
Steve didn't know what to say. He hadn't expected to make it as far as he had. He hadn't expected Eddie to be real, not really. He'd never been good with his words. He wrapped his arms around Eddie and held him tightly, trying to erase the last memory of his glassy brown eyes, staring sightless at the stars, his bloodless body painted red.
Steve buried his face in Eddie's chest, never mind the dry gravel digging into his exposed flesh. His breathing was uneven. He was startlingly close to crying and Eddie seemed to notice.
"Hey, all that for little old me," He muttered, shifting, freeing a hand so he could angle Steve's face to meet his gaze.
"I missed you," Steve remarked.
If Eddie were a normal person, he might have said something like 'you don't know me, how could you miss me?' Good thing Eddie Munson was anything but a normal person.
"I missed you too," Eddie replied and gave Steve one more tight squeeze, looking for a moment like he couldn't believe it was something Steve was letting him do. Steve wanted him to do it again.
"As much as I'd like to stay here with you, if we don't get moving, something's bound to catch up with us. This area has been a hotbed for hell beasts lately."
The two broke apart and started to make their way towards the vine-like wall where Steve had entered. They jogged at a steady pace. Steve hoped the military was bound for their fortress in The Upside Down and wouldn't be coming back soon, but he could never be sure.
"I can't believe you actually made it," Eddie gasped as he ran, exhilarated by Steve's mere presence.
"I told you, Munson. Sneaky, like a ninja, and you doubted me," Steve laughed.
"I didn't underestimate your abilities, so much as I overestimated the goddamn military," Eddie spoke. He kept glancing at Steve, as though disbelieving his eyes.
"You'd be surprised how far I'd go for a good date, Munson." Steve shot Eddie a wink. Eddie let out a strangled cough.
It surprised Steve how easy flirting with him was once he'd permitted himself. He revelled in the way he'd made Eddie Munson, a fully grown man, blush. Oh, Steve could get used to this. Flirting with Eddie was new and thrilling. How had Steve spent so long not doing it?
'A 'good date,' huh? Laying it on a little thick there, sweetheart. I'm a mediocre date at best," Eddie uttered, picking up the pace.
Steve hung back for a moment, just to watch the way his body moved. If he'd had any doubt he was straight, the thoughts that sprang to his mind as he watched Eddie's body move put a stop to it.
"You'll just have to prove it then," Steve smirked, running to catch up with Eddie, teasingly tugging the bandanna from the back pocket of his jeans as he did so.
He heard Eddie mutter, 'Jesus H. Christ' under his breath.
It wasn't long before the two arrived at the burn site. Steve pulled the flask from his pocket, drenching the wall of strange vine-like growths in kerosene.
"Steve, if this doesn't work..." Eddie began, but Steve held up a hand to stop him. It had to work.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow night at the high school parking lot," Eddie pushed.
"It's going to work."
"We've only got one shot at this tonight. You've got enough lighter fluid for one run out, and I'm not letting you get stuck here with me. If it doesn't work, we'll try something else. We'll work it out."
Steve turned to face Eddie, looking down at the boy's ringed fingers. He wanted to touch them. No one was stopping him. He pulled the boy's hands into his. They were rough and calloused in a way that made Steve's mouth go dry. How the hell hadn't he considered how good a man's hands could feel? Logistically, he knew, but now that he'd allowed himself to consider it, there was a whole world he'd been missing out on.
When Steve looked up from Eddie's hands, he was surprised to meet startled brown eyes. Eddie's gaze shifted over Steve's face, landing on his lips. Please. Steve thought. Please.
"I'm going to kiss you, so if things go south, we both know what we've got to look forward to. Okay?" Steve nodded.
"Okay."
One of Eddie's hands moved to encircle the back of Steve's neck, while the other landed palm down on the side of his face. He hadn't realised Eddie had stubble until he was kissing him. God, it was good. Eddie's rough hands with their gentle touch made Steve weak at the knees. He surged forward, deepening the kiss. One hand trailed down to the small of Eddie's back, and the other settled lower still.
Steve could die in that moment, and he'd die happy.
The sound of distant cars caused the two to spring apart. Steve wanted more. They didn't have time.
"We've gotta go." Eddie nodded.
Steve reached for his lighter and watched as the fire scorched through the vines. He gripped Eddie's hand hard. The hole left was narrow. Steve went first, but as soon as Eddie's hand reached the threshold, Steve felt the resistance. He tugged harder, hoping it would help, but Eddie didn't budge. Steve gazed over his shoulder at the boy and caught his sad smile.
"It's okay, Stevie. We knew it was a long shot."
It wasn't fair. It goddamn wasn't fair.
"I'm not leaving you," Steve insisted.
Eddie squeezed Steve's hand.
"Come back and visit soon, okay?"
Eddie let go of Steve's hand and pushed him out of the Upside Down. He landed with a thud on the familiar ground of Hawkins.
He lay in the dirt, looking up at the stars. The night was silent, not quiet.
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spotify wrapped is out and everybody is always posting their top 5 songs….. let’s see some love for number 6 that didn’t make the cut. rb and add your number 6
If you get this, answer w/ three random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs in your notifs. Anon or not, doesn't matter, let's get to know the person behind the blog! Only if you want to :)
omg <3333
i have almost 100 houseplants (hoping they make it through the winter ok 🤞)
last month i deluded myself into thinking i could knit a blouse 3 by knitthing in time for my company's holiday party (actually impossible). it's why i've been quiet here lately, literally every free second i have i'm busy knitting
give me a blank periodic table, and i can fill it out 🤷♀️
