My current handle is hybeana (a portmanteau of hyena and bean). I have previously posted artwork using other handles (i.e. creepywyrm, localbeanbag). All work that has been posted by me will be properly attributed to the work's respective creator regardless of the signature.
As an artist, I work with a multitude of mediums - short stories, poetry, textile, fiber, digital, and traditional such as paint or pencil. Most of my art focuses on character creation and illustration.
Please be aware that I post 18+ content here on Tumblr as well as on Bluesky. If you'd like to look through a library of my original characters and their stories, then feel free to check out my Toyhouse! I am also participating in Art Fight this year.
All of my original works are tagged with #hybeana's work regardless of medium.
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To match Drifter's fullbody reference sheet, I made a quick fullbody reference for Roadkill, too. I have decided that even though Roadkill is an operator, he is physically 18.
Due to the fact that he is older than other tenno, his body has more physical influence from the Void. For example, any scars he has - even those from surgery - turn into Void scars similar to that of the Holdfasts. (Although I haven't made this official for his character yet, I imagine this might have caused his tattoos to shine with a slight metallic blue-gray sheen similar to the Void scars.) The center of his pupils also glow with Void energy.
He had a double mastectomy as well as phalloplasty. He's been on testosterone ever since he learned that he could be on it in the first place.
Hello dears ! I am asking you to support my campaign to help me to reach my goal. I am now in bad need to your support to help me stay alive and safe. Gaza is a very dangerous place either on the level of livelihood or on the level of souls. I need your monetary support to ensble me to get the basic needs for my family till Rafah crossing point reopens to move my family to safety and peace.Pleasd help a family be alive through your small donations or througn your shares to others.Thank you so much for your stand beside people in need .
Hi! I am very sorry I took so long to publish your ask.
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đI am Mahmoud Ayyad, a Palestinian from the besieged and destroyed Gaza đđ, coming from an extended family of young children, women and elderly people â¤â¤ who have been sufferingđđ for 300 difficult days from an aggressive war.
Our lives are harsh because we lack all the basic necessities of life. Everything has become scarce and unattainable. There is no food, no water, no medicine.
So, I ask you to help me keep my family safe and alive, especially after we had lost all our sources of livelihood.Please do not leave my family to struggle and suffer these difficult days alone. You can support my campaign by donating whatever you can or by sharing my posts to reach others who can help us survive the war to safety and peace. You are helping the lives of many people with your small contribution. Every donation makes a difference in our very difficult lives. But this is a legitimate campaign and has been checked by 90-ghost.
https://gofund.me/31c5cbe3
Thank you so much for sharing your fundraiser with me!
This fundraiser has been vetted by someone! Please donate if you can. Thank you!
I don't like asking for help, but today I truly need to.
It's been a while since our campaign received any support, and I would be lying if I said that doesn't scare me đ
Behind this fundraiser is a family still trying to rebuild their life, a student still trying to hold onto his education, and people who are doing their best not to lose hope.
When donations stop, our struggles don't stop with them. The worries, responsibilities, and uncertainty are still here every single day.
So if you've been following our story, if you've ever felt sympathy for what we're going through, please consider helping us today. Even a small donation can make a real difference, and even sharing our campaign could help us reach someone willing to support.
Thank you to everyone who has stood beside us so far. Your kindness means more than words can express đ¤đ
https://gofund.me/5cdd060e
This campaign appears to have been vetted by @.bilal-sala7, so please consider donating! Much love.
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While you argue online about "protecting children," actual children in Palestine struggle to live a normal life because they are not safe from war and poverty.
Amir's dialogue was inspired by a video I saw where a woman compared her body type to a corgi, and cited this as to why some people's goals shouldn't be focused on fat loss. I can't find the video but shoutout to her lovely mind
Rating: Non-Explicit, Adult Themes
Categories: M/M, Drifter x Amir, M!Drifter, FTM!Drifter, pre-established relationship, suggestive, domestic fluff, hurt/comfort, disordered eating, weight gain, referenced child abuse, implied/referenced CSA, no beta we die like adis
~
It was New Yearâs Eve, but it wasnât just any New Yearâs Eve â it was the New Yearâs Eve. This was officially the last day of 1999. Forever. Drifter and the Hex had finally stopped the nuke from detonating, and everyone was partying like it was, well⌠1999!
It hadnât been easy. The total number of loops it took had definitely exceeded six. Drifter was the only person capable of keeping records from one loop to the next. Eleanor helped, of course, as she could pipe information from Drifterâs mind to the others as needed. That method wasnât foolproof, though. Memories are fragile, so recorded information in the form of cassette tapes, paper and pen, photos, and videos was extremely valuable.
So, there they sat. Sitting in a circle on the floor, surrounded by balloons and confetti and alcohol, and looking through the only physical proof that those previous loops had happened at all.
âAww,â Aoi cooed. âQuincy, you look so happy in this one!â
In her hands, she held a photo of Quincy and Amir. Their arms were locked around one another in a side-hug, and they both had rifles slung over their shoulders. With his free hand, Amir was holding up a soda can with a pronounced hole in it â all the way through. Quincy was practically grinning ear-to-ear, his eyes crinkling with joy and pride.
âOh, I remember when that happened,â Drifter said. âQuincy was teaching Amir how to aim with a scope. That was the first time he actually hit something.â
Aoi passed the photo to Quincy, who smiled warmly. He didnât remember taking the photo â how could he? â but he still felt just as proud.
âHoly shit, babe!â Amir suddenly exclaimed, jaw agape, holding up a different photo so that Drifter could see. âWhen is this one from?â
Examining the photo, the corner of Drifterâs mouth twitched upward. âThat? Thatâs the only photo I have from the first loop.â
Immediately, everyone scooted over so that they could see, too.
The photo itself was nothing special. It appeared as though Amir had been holding the camera selfie-style, so his face wasnât fully in-frame. His face wore an open-mouthed smile. Behind him, Lettie and Drifter were sitting at one of the tables in the food court. Their candid expressions â Lettieâs mouth was open and one of her hands were raised, as if she were in the middle of talking, and Drifter looked confused and surprised, if not a little irritated, and both with their eyes fixed on the intruding photographer â showing that Amir had caught them off-guard.
What had piqued Amirâs interest in the photo was the fact that Drifter was a completely different weight than he currently was. The Drifter in the photo had a gaunt face, and there was practically no fat stores on his stomach or thighs whatsoever. He looked like an actor in a movie that had dehydrated himself in order to show off his chiseled abs.
In contrast, the Drifter next to him had a full face, a big round belly, and ample body fat. He had a proper strongman build.
âOh, wow! You lookâŚâ
âDifferent,â Drifter completed the sentence for him. âI know.â
âI-I mean- Itâs not a bad different,â Amir sputtered, suddenly acutely aware of the faux pas he just committed. âYou- I think you look really good!â
Drifter smiled fondly, remembering.
âI know you do.â
~
In the backroom, Drifter stood in front of the floor-length mirror examining himself.
Lettie demanded that he receive an annual check-up just like the rest of the Hex did. During said check-up, she recorded his weight for him. He was several pounds heavier than the previous year.
When he was a little girl, his father was strict about what he was and wasnât allowed to eat. There was an expectation for Drifter to be what the Orokin desired in a yuvan â thin, beautiful, youthful. He wasnât allowed to take up space.
Then, Duviri happened.
Nutrient cubes were designed to have the bare minimum amount of calories, vitamins, and minerals that a person needed to survive. They also tasted terrible. Wishing food into reality through conceptual embodiment provided him with flavor, yes, but it didnât provide him with any energy â well, any non-Void energy, that is. If Drifter wanted to eat something else â something real, then he had to work for it. He taught himself how to hunt, process skin and meat from an animal, light a fire, and cook.
To make a very, very, very long story short, Drifter had a complicated relationship with food.
Now that he lived with the Hex, he had access to more food than he even knew what to do with. His new friends loved introducing him to new foods. What was mundane to them was exciting to Drifter. It was novel!
Arthur had taken to using Drifter as his willing guinea pig for testing recipes. Square spaghetti incident aside, Arthur was a pretty decent chef.
Amir showed him pizza, cupcakes, pie, chips, chocolate, hamburgers, hotdogs, beer, french fries â all of the Libertatian favorites! He also made sure to share some of the dishes that his dad used to serve at his restaurant. Amirâs dadâs recipes always reminded Drifter of his giddaâs cooking.
Eleanor shared opulent drinks like wine, while Aoi shared fun drinks like bubble tea. Sometimes Lettie made simple dishes like arroz con leche, and other times she put the whole team to work making tamales together. Quincy was the one to find out that the only way to make Techrot meat taste remotely edible is by jerking it â a style of cooking from Xaymaca.
It was refreshing to try new foods, but Drifter found himself feeling⌠guilty.
âBabe?â he called out. âDo you think Iâm getting⌠fat?â
Amir quickly looked up from where he sat on the couch, doing a double-take before before returning his gaze back to his handheld game.
âI- I mean,â he stuttered. âI donât think my opinion on your body should matter, yâknow?â
Drifter frowned. âYeah. I guess not.â
He pulled up the hem of his shirt and pinched his own stomach. He was able to hold about an inch or two of fat and skin with little resistance. A nagging voice in the back of his head told him that he needed to cut back. A voice that sounded like his father and said he was becoming unattractive. A voice that sounded like Dominus Thrax and said that he didnât deserve to eat that much food.
âBut if you had to pick,â Drifter persisted. âDo you prefer how I look when Iâm skinnier orâŚ?â
Amirâs eyes looked past his game as it made a losing beep, his eyes unfocused, and his leg began to bounce nervously. Without a screen focus on, his eyes cast about the room as he considered how to best answer the question. He wanted to be honest without hurting his boyfriendâs feelings or imposing himself in a controlling way. He shrugged and shook his head.
âUm⌠I donât think it matters how you look,â Amir said. âHow you feel matters more than that.â
Drifter frowned again. âI feel terrible.â
Then it was Amirâs turn to frown.
âAw, baby⌠How come?â Amir asked. He stood up and began to make his way over, tossing his handheld game aside onto the couch. âCome on, talk to me. Whatâs all this about?â
Drifter almost felt as though he could cry, but it felt buried too deep inside of him to dig out. It was still early in their relationship. Opening up about his past â his father, Duviri, everything â was still hard. Amir insisted that they take it slow. They already had plenty of heated makeout sessions and even gotten a little handsy, but they hadnât gone âall the wayâ yet. Part of him was worried that if he got fat, then Amir wouldnât be attracted to him anymore and their newly budding sex life would stop.
As Amir approached, he brought his hand up to cup Drifterâs cheek and pouted. His eyes were dark, almost black, and glossy like smoky quartz. Amirâs kubby-kubrow eyes were not easy to resist.
âI think⌠Iâm scared?â Drifter admitted, speaking slowly as he processed his emotions in real-time. It felt like purple lightning was dancing its way through his insides. âIâm scared that⌠you wonât want to have sex with me.â
âWhat?!â Amir exclaimed, half-laughing. âI- You- Okay. There is no way in hell that would happen, babe.â
âOh, donât laugh!â Drifter scowled and crossed his arms.
âIâm sorry for laughing. I just- You want my honest opinion? Like, my really real forreal opinion?â
âYes!â Drifter said exasperatedly. âThatâs why I asked!â
Amir cleared his throat, and then clapped his hands together before casting his eyes around again. âOkay, well⌠I⌠I honestly think you could stand to gain more weight.â
Drifter made a face. â...What?â
âWhat? Don't look at me like that. You asked for my honest opinion!â
âYeah, I know I did! But⌠what? Why? Lettie said my BMI-â
Amir threw up his hands and shook them defensively. âN-N-N-N-N-No, look look look look look look look- Listen, okay? Number one- Donât ever say the word BMI to me again. Number two- People- People are like dogs. Every dog is a different breed, right? Some dogs are small, like chihuahuas, and some dogs are really big, like Scooby Doo. One time my nana had this chihuahua and all she fed it was cheese puffs and table scraps, and so it got so big and fat that it could barely even move on itâs own. Thatâs unhealthy! Iâm not denying that being fat is unhealthy for some people. But you? Youâre like⌠Youâre like a mastiff! Youâre a mastiff, and youâve been treating yourself as if you were a chihuahua. Now thatâs unhealthy! Iâm not gonna lie and say I havenât noticed that you put on some weight in the past few months, but⌠you look healthy. It looks good on you because thatâs thatâs the breed of dog that you are. Your body type is tall and big and wide and strong, and thatâs not a bad thing! Does that make sense?â
Drifter blinked.
A multitude of questions swirled themselves around Drifterâs mind. The most important one being: What is a mastiff, and how can I acquire one? That, and also: Amir thinks I look good?
âYeah. I guess that makes sense, but⌠What about you? Youâre-â
âMe? Oh, easy! Iâm like a border collie. Not too big, not too small, and if you donât take me on regular walks then Iâll go crazy,â Amir said matter-of-factly, punctuating his statement with crossed arms and a sage nod.
âRight. And I understand the dog metaphor, but that doesnât answer m-â
âBabe, baby, babycakes, my sweet precious babycakes- Iâm gonna hold your hand while I say this,â Amir began, taking Drifter by the hands and looking into his eyes. âLook at me. Stop worrying about it. Please. I think youâre perfectly fine the way that you are! ...And besides! If it were my choice, youâd be as big as humanly possible, and Iâd have the power to morph into a futon at will so that whenever you got tired I could adore every waking second of you using me like your personal 3-in-1 bed, chair, and footstool. I didnât get with a 6-foot-something tall, grown ass man because I like petite, mâkay? I love you, and frankly I want you to crush me.â
Drifterâs face turned a deep crimson. âOh.â
Amir cleared his throat once more, and as he looked away his cheeks were rosy. âDoes, uh⌠Does that answer your question?â
Drifter smiled bashfully, and then leaned in to plant a kiss on his boyfriendâs lips. Amir kissed back chastely, but passionately.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Amir's dialogue was inspired by a video I saw where a woman compared her body type to a corgi, and cited this as to why some people's goals shouldn't be focused on fat loss. I can't find the video but shoutout to her lovely mind
Rating: Non-Explicit, Adult Themes
Categories: M/M, Drifter x Amir, M!Drifter, FTM!Drifter, pre-established relationship, suggestive, domestic fluff, hurt/comfort, disordered eating, weight gain, referenced child abuse, implied/referenced CSA, no beta we die like adis
~
It was New Yearâs Eve, but it wasnât just any New Yearâs Eve â it was the New Yearâs Eve. This was officially the last day of 1999. Forever. Drifter and the Hex had finally stopped the nuke from detonating, and everyone was partying like it was, well⌠1999!
It hadnât been easy. The total number of loops it took had definitely exceeded six. Drifter was the only person capable of keeping records from one loop to the next. Eleanor helped, of course, as she could pipe information from Drifterâs mind to the others as needed. That method wasnât foolproof, though. Memories are fragile, so recorded information in the form of cassette tapes, paper and pen, photos, and videos was extremely valuable.
So, there they sat. Sitting in a circle on the floor, surrounded by balloons and confetti and alcohol, and looking through the only physical proof that those previous loops had happened at all.
âAww,â Aoi cooed. âQuincy, you look so happy in this one!â
In her hands, she held a photo of Quincy and Amir. Their arms were locked around one another in a side-hug, and they both had rifles slung over their shoulders. With his free hand, Amir was holding up a soda can with a pronounced hole in it â all the way through. Quincy was practically grinning ear-to-ear, his eyes crinkling with joy and pride.
âOh, I remember when that happened,â Drifter said. âQuincy was teaching Amir how to aim with a scope. That was the first time he actually hit something.â
Aoi passed the photo to Quincy, who smiled warmly. He didnât remember taking the photo â how could he? â but he still felt just as proud.
âHoly shit, babe!â Amir suddenly exclaimed, jaw agape, holding up a different photo so that Drifter could see. âWhen is this one from?â
Examining the photo, the corner of Drifterâs mouth twitched upward. âThat? Thatâs the only photo I have from the first loop.â
Immediately, everyone scooted over so that they could see, too.
The photo itself was nothing special. It appeared as though Amir had been holding the camera selfie-style, so his face wasnât fully in-frame. His face wore an open-mouthed smile. Behind him, Lettie and Drifter were sitting at one of the tables in the food court. Their candid expressions â Lettieâs mouth was open and one of her hands were raised, as if she were in the middle of talking, and Drifter looked confused and surprised, if not a little irritated, and both with their eyes fixed on the intruding photographer â showing that Amir had caught them off-guard.
What had piqued Amirâs interest in the photo was the fact that Drifter was a completely different weight than he currently was. The Drifter in the photo had a gaunt face, and there was practically no fat stores on his stomach or thighs whatsoever. He looked like an actor in a movie that had dehydrated himself in order to show off his chiseled abs.
In contrast, the Drifter next to him had a full face, a big round belly, and ample body fat. He had a proper strongman build.
âOh, wow! You lookâŚâ
âDifferent,â Drifter completed the sentence for him. âI know.â
âI-I mean- Itâs not a bad different,â Amir sputtered, suddenly acutely aware of the faux pas he just committed. âYou- I think you look really good!â
Drifter smiled fondly, remembering.
âI know you do.â
~
In the backroom, Drifter stood in front of the floor-length mirror examining himself.
Lettie demanded that he receive an annual check-up just like the rest of the Hex did. During said check-up, she recorded his weight for him. He was several pounds heavier than the previous year.
When he was a little girl, his father was strict about what he was and wasnât allowed to eat. There was an expectation for Drifter to be what the Orokin desired in a yuvan â thin, beautiful, youthful. He wasnât allowed to take up space.
Then, Duviri happened.
Nutrient cubes were designed to have the bare minimum amount of calories, vitamins, and minerals that a person needed to survive. They also tasted terrible. Wishing food into reality through conceptual embodiment provided him with flavor, yes, but it didnât provide him with any energy â well, any non-Void energy, that is. If Drifter wanted to eat something else â something real, then he had to work for it. He taught himself how to hunt, process skin and meat from an animal, light a fire, and cook.
To make a very, very, very long story short, Drifter had a complicated relationship with food.
Now that he lived with the Hex, he had access to more food than he even knew what to do with. His new friends loved introducing him to new foods. What was mundane to them was exciting to Drifter. It was novel!
Arthur had taken to using Drifter as his willing guinea pig for testing recipes. Square spaghetti incident aside, Arthur was a pretty decent chef.
Amir showed him pizza, cupcakes, pie, chips, chocolate, hamburgers, hotdogs, beer, french fries â all of the Libertatian favorites! He also made sure to share some of the dishes that his dad used to serve at his restaurant. Amirâs dadâs recipes always reminded Drifter of his giddaâs cooking.
Eleanor shared opulent drinks like wine, while Aoi shared fun drinks like bubble tea. Sometimes Lettie made simple dishes like arroz con leche, and other times she put the whole team to work making tamales together. Quincy was the one to find out that the only way to make Techrot meat taste remotely edible is by jerking it â a style of cooking from Xaymaca.
It was refreshing to try new foods, but Drifter found himself feeling⌠guilty.
âBabe?â he called out. âDo you think Iâm getting⌠fat?â
Amir quickly looked up from where he sat on the couch, doing a double-take before before returning his gaze back to his handheld game.
âI- I mean,â he stuttered. âI donât think my opinion on your body should matter, yâknow?â
Drifter frowned. âYeah. I guess not.â
He pulled up the hem of his shirt and pinched his own stomach. He was able to hold about an inch or two of fat and skin with little resistance. A nagging voice in the back of his head told him that he needed to cut back. A voice that sounded like his father and said he was becoming unattractive. A voice that sounded like Dominus Thrax and said that he didnât deserve to eat that much food.
âBut if you had to pick,â Drifter persisted. âDo you prefer how I look when Iâm skinnier orâŚ?â
Amirâs eyes looked past his game as it made a losing beep, his eyes unfocused, and his leg began to bounce nervously. Without a screen focus on, his eyes cast about the room as he considered how to best answer the question. He wanted to be honest without hurting his boyfriendâs feelings or imposing himself in a controlling way. He shrugged and shook his head.
âUm⌠I donât think it matters how you look,â Amir said. âHow you feel matters more than that.â
Drifter frowned again. âI feel terrible.â
Then it was Amirâs turn to frown.
âAw, baby⌠How come?â Amir asked. He stood up and began to make his way over, tossing his handheld game aside onto the couch. âCome on, talk to me. Whatâs all this about?â
Drifter almost felt as though he could cry, but it felt buried too deep inside of him to dig out. It was still early in their relationship. Opening up about his past â his father, Duviri, everything â was still hard. Amir insisted that they take it slow. They already had plenty of heated makeout sessions and even gotten a little handsy, but they hadnât gone âall the wayâ yet. Part of him was worried that if he got fat, then Amir wouldnât be attracted to him anymore and their newly budding sex life would stop.
As Amir approached, he brought his hand up to cup Drifterâs cheek and pouted. His eyes were dark, almost black, and glossy like smoky quartz. Amirâs kubby-kubrow eyes were not easy to resist.
âI think⌠Iâm scared?â Drifter admitted, speaking slowly as he processed his emotions in real-time. It felt like purple lightning was dancing its way through his insides. âIâm scared that⌠you wonât want to have sex with me.â
âWhat?!â Amir exclaimed, half-laughing. âI- You- Okay. There is no way in hell that would happen, babe.â
âOh, donât laugh!â Drifter scowled and crossed his arms.
âIâm sorry for laughing. I just- You want my honest opinion? Like, my really real forreal opinion?â
âYes!â Drifter said exasperatedly. âThatâs why I asked!â
Amir cleared his throat, and then clapped his hands together before casting his eyes around again. âOkay, well⌠I⌠I honestly think you could stand to gain more weight.â
Drifter made a face. â...What?â
âWhat? Don't look at me like that. You asked for my honest opinion!â
âYeah, I know I did! But⌠what? Why? Lettie said my BMI-â
Amir threw up his hands and shook them defensively. âN-N-N-N-N-No, look look look look look look look- Listen, okay? Number one- Donât ever say the word BMI to me again. Number two- People- People are like dogs. Every dog is a different breed, right? Some dogs are small, like chihuahuas, and some dogs are really big, like Scooby Doo. One time my nana had this chihuahua and all she fed it was cheese puffs and table scraps, and so it got so big and fat that it could barely even move on itâs own. Thatâs unhealthy! Iâm not denying that being fat is unhealthy for some people. But you? Youâre like⌠Youâre like a mastiff! Youâre a mastiff, and youâve been treating yourself as if you were a chihuahua. Now thatâs unhealthy! Iâm not gonna lie and say I havenât noticed that you put on some weight in the past few months, but⌠you look healthy. It looks good on you because thatâs thatâs the breed of dog that you are. Your body type is tall and big and wide and strong, and thatâs not a bad thing! Does that make sense?â
Drifter blinked.
A multitude of questions swirled themselves around Drifterâs mind. The most important one being: What is a mastiff, and how can I acquire one? That, and also: Amir thinks I look good?
âYeah. I guess that makes sense, but⌠What about you? Youâre-â
âMe? Oh, easy! Iâm like a border collie. Not too big, not too small, and if you donât take me on regular walks then Iâll go crazy,â Amir said matter-of-factly, punctuating his statement with crossed arms and a sage nod.
âRight. And I understand the dog metaphor, but that doesnât answer m-â
âBabe, baby, babycakes, my sweet precious babycakes- Iâm gonna hold your hand while I say this,â Amir began, taking Drifter by the hands and looking into his eyes. âLook at me. Stop worrying about it. Please. I think youâre perfectly fine the way that you are! ...And besides! If it were my choice, youâd be as big as humanly possible, and Iâd have the power to morph into a futon at will so that whenever you got tired I could adore every waking second of you using me like your personal 3-in-1 bed, chair, and footstool. I didnât get with a 6-foot-something tall, grown ass man because I like petite, mâkay? I love you, and frankly I want you to crush me.â
Drifterâs face turned a deep crimson. âOh.â
Amir cleared his throat once more, and as he looked away his cheeks were rosy. âDoes, uh⌠Does that answer your question?â
Drifter smiled bashfully, and then leaned in to plant a kiss on his boyfriendâs lips. Amir kissed back chastely, but passionately.
