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And how could anyone hear you anyway? Not when the silence had already won. This total, crushing emptiness. Not even with time itself. 

Seconds seemed to bleed into minutes, and minutes into hours. Without the steady anchor of the clock, time itself seemed to lose all form. And, ‘conveniently’ enough, you had completely forgotten your watch. Which was great. Fantastic, even. Especially since your phone had just died right after you texted Pierrot to come keep you company on the walk back. It was infuriating, really — you could have sworn it was charging during your shift and sitting on a whole battery.

…

But how long had it been since you two had left your workplace at the cafe? 

Several minutes at least? An hour, perhaps? 

Despite the uncertainty, your voice finally returned to you after what seemed like years of heavy, numb silence. 

It was the first time you’d spoken since the walk back to your apartment began, but neither you nor Pierrot minded the quiet until now. Between you and the red clown, silence was something that comfortably settled into the spaces where conversation didn’t need to exist. After all, Pierrot seemed quite content simply walking beside you, leaving you free to occupy yourself with listening to the rhythm of your footsteps against the cool pavement. 

Or at least, that’s what you had hoped. 

The day had been far too long to worry too much about that right now. 

Long enough for your shoulders to grow stiff and sore from scrubbing dried coffee stains from tables that had seen loads of impatient customers, your fingers to wrinkle from rinsing sticky pitchers once filled with steamed milk, and for the smell of roasted espresso beans to settle stubbornly into your clothes.

And as the day stretched onward, the cafe had started to slowly empty itself into the night. 

One by one, chairs had been lifted onto tables, floors swept clean of sugar packets and crumbs, pastry displays emptied, and every receipt tucked neatly away after counting the cash drawer twice to make certain nothing came up short. And before you forgot to do so, the trash bags were tied up tightly before being hauled out in the back, where the leftover stale coffee grounds mingled with soaked pieces of cardboard and who-knows-what-else since people tended to throw away anything they didn’t want to carry around in their pockets. 

And during your shift, Nathaniel, your boss, had caught you rubbing your eyes more than once.   

“You’ve done enough,” he said in a firm, yet gentle voice. “I can finish locking up. Just…”

Giving you a sympathetic smile, he patted you once on the back.

“Go home and rest.”

Looking around the cafe one last time, you checked everything. 

Counters wiped. 

Floors swept.

Machines cleaned.

Lights dimmed.

Good. 

Everything seemed to be in its place.

Jingling the keys between his fingers, Nathaniel made his way towards the door, opening it for you.

“Have a good night,” he called out.

Making sure that you gathered all your stuff, you glanced back over your shoulder.

“You too.”

___

And now the concrete beneath your shoes felt like ice. 

Streetlights that loomed above the two of you buzzed with a low, mechanical hum, casting a jaundiced glow that barely pierced the heavy night air. Around their glass casings, a few moths danced a frantic waltz, their fragile wings tapping against the hot metal as if trying to become one with the light itself. And, underneath one of these lights, your body decided to come to a halt. Every few seconds, the dying bulb above you would stammer, plunging the pavement into darkness before snapping back to life with a harsh, suffocating hiss. 

Just a few feet behind you, swallowed by the dense, impenetrable shadow where the light failed to reach, Pierrot stood.

Somewhere during the walk with him, your hands had drifted apart.

Neither of you had verbally acknowledged it at first, but the moment your fingers slipped from his, the clown’s pace faltered. With his hand suspended in the air, his claws twitched ever so slightly as if trying to catch the fading warmth of your skin before he sadly dropped his arm to his side. He adjusted his stride, lingering a few feet behind you.

Close enough that he could shield you, but far enough to respect the sudden distance you had created. 

Swallowing back the heavy knot of anxiety beginning to form in his throat, he could feel his smile start to drop.

It shouldn’t be a big deal, right? Hopefully? Maybe? He forced his broad shoulders to square, desperately trying to project the confidence of the protector he was supposed to be rather than the insecurity of someone that was abandoned. You had asked for his company tonight, and not anyone else’s. You trusted him enough to get you through the dark, and he refused to ruin that by making you feel pressured or anything like that. 

Besides, tonight was a rare gift. It was one of the circus’ few nights planned without a performance, as Jester wanted to do some, in his words, “preparations.” Tomorrow night, however, the circus would swell with the crowds once more, eager to laugh, scream, and applaud until their hands stung. He would be back on stage then, ready to return with yet another knife throwing act.

But tonight belonged to you, and so you were his own priority for the time being.

His golden eyes softened while looking at you, being content just to watch. 

You were safe with him. He would make sure of it.

Nothing could ever come to harm you. 

After all, the late night walks home always carried a vulnerable edge.

But tonight?

The familiar route you’ve always taken through the middle of the empty streets felt…

Off. Somehow. 

The word, 'vulnerable,' seemed too light to use in a situation like this. 

The shadows seemed longer, the air too still. 

Pierrot’s instincts flared; his face hardened, the soft look in his golden eyes vanishing as they turned into slits, carefully scanning around the perimeter and cutting through everything. The darkened sky above. The hazy streetlights. The gloomy storefronts. Every crook and cranny that surrounded the two of you. Every window and door alike. He wanted to pull you close against the creeping unease of the environment, tightly wrap his arms around your shoulders, and press you against his chest while the bottom of his chin rested on the top of your head — but he hesitated. Staring at your turned back, he didn’t want to startle you. He had already done that once before, so he didn’t want to do that again after hearing how your heart seemed to be running a hundred miles at the time. 

Taking a deep, steadying breath to smooth the tension from his features, and, with your back still turned, Pierrot took some time to scan the rest of the environment before deciding to speak up. 

Trash cans lined the curb, filled to the brim with an awful amount of junk. Crushed soda cans, dirtied napkins, sticky wads of gum, and the distinctive coffee cups from your workplace is what made it up. Apart from that, crumpled flyers promoting the Circus of Horrors, the same ones that the Fools were promoting very eagerly in the daytime with their exaggerated whispers and tall tales, were stuffed carelessly into the waste. They were plastered everywhere, so it only made sense that some would end up in the bin.

Yet, for some reason, the air above the garbage was dead; no flies buzzed around the filth, no rats fed off the scraps inside, and not a single stray cat rummaged through it.

But that wasn’t the only thing. 

Long rows of parked cars filled the sides of the street, being far more than usual because of the circus’ massive popularity. Yet, despite the amount of vehicles, the sidewalks were bare of people. Nobody was around partying, laughing, or walking to their doors. 

Strange.

Usually, at this late hour, a couple of stray cars would’ve passed the two of you; people drove late because of odd work hours or travelers racing against time crunches on a long distance trip. Tonight, however, the streets were entirely starved of motion. It felt empty despite the amount of stuff surrounding the two of you; towering brick buildings, dark apartment complexes, and tightly packed houses.

But the city didn’t feel like it had fallen asleep.

It just felt like it…stopped for a moment or two. 

His eyes returned to you before he decided to speak up. He had a rule to follow, after all. Pierrot couldn’t risk it.

“Yes, my dear…?” 

Then, with caution, or perhaps a spark of curiosity, he took a step forwards, his head slightly tilting to the side as he tried to catch a glimpse of your shadowed face. He wasn’t quite sure what it was you wanted to talk to him about, but he assumed it was about the seemingly daunting distance between your workplace at the cafe and your apartment. Since it was so late at night, Pierrot thought you were merely worried about your safety, completely forgetting that he had been there to protect you every single step of the way.

“I believe we are almost to your home,” he had started off, voice growing just a little louder than a whisper so you could hear him properly. “So do not worry, there is no need to be afraid while I am with you.”

You remained facing forward.

Then you spoke again.

“You said you would love me no matter what, right?”

…

What?

The question caught him a little off guard, snapping him out of his comforting assurances towards you as he almost frowned at the thought of you believing otherwise. 

“...I did,” he replied in a somewhat stunned tone. 

Absentmindedly, his fingers found a strand of white hair, twisting it before his voice dropped into a breathless, racing cadence.

“I meant every word.”

He took a step forward.

“I meant it with every fiber of my being.”

Another step. 

“No matter the circumstances…”

Another. 

He was getting closer to you.

His hand drifted to his opposite sleeve, fidgeting for a second before falling back to his side again.

“…”

Closer. 

“…We were always meant to be together.”

His voice became little more than a hushed whisper, hands reaching towards one of your own to gently hold it now that he had closed the distance between you two.

“It was like fate itself orchestrated our meeting. Destiny, even. The universe deliberately brought us together, crossing our paths where our very souls would connect to become one altogether…”

As the words tumbled out, his gentle grip on your hand seemed to tighten. The manic energy of his pure and utter devotion towards you pulsed through his fingers, claws beginning to dig into your wrist and pressing firmly against your skin. Not hard to make you bleed, but enough for you to feel the pressure behind it. Behind your back, his massive body loomed close, eclipsing you from the light above. If you were to turn around right now, your face would be a mere inch away from bumping into him. 

“I could feel it the very moment my eyes found yours that day — a sudden burst, no, a sudden rush in my heart, body, and mind, that I was entirely meant for you…a-a-as you were meant for me…!”

The clown was unraveling right behind you, completely consumed by the sheer force of his feelings. A hot red flush flooded his cheeks, darkening the mask he wore. His brilliant golden eyes began to dilate, pupils expanding until they nearly swallowed the irises whole. His smile grew too, stretching wide across his face into a terrifying ecstatic grin full of razor sharp teeth. The intense, overwhelming weight of his presence pressed against your back; you could feel his chest and shoulders begin to shake with a manic tremor, heart pounding so violently against his ribs that the heavy sound of it practically vibrated through your spine.

Thump thump.

Thump thump. 

“There was something…something…running through my veins, screaming at me that my very existence up until that point had found another piece of myself…”

Thump thump.

Thump thump. 

“We - we weren’t just two individuals walking down a dark street together! Instead, we were two halves of the same design, bound by something greater than ourselves.”

He leaned in closer to where you could feel his breath skim the back of your neck. 

“If I had to, my dear, I would do anything you asked me to. Anything. Existing without you wouldn’t be living at all, it would…”

Thump thump.

Thump —

…

He paused, snapping out of something. 

Your body, once as still as a statue, flinched.

A wave of regret crashed over Pierrot, breaking him out of his trance as he realized how his excitement could be seen as something frightening.

Dropping heavily to his knees behind you, his expression shifted into one of dreadful concern and self-awareness.

“I - sorry! F- forgive me, please, I - I - I didn’t mean to — I wouldn’t…” He stammered, beginning to get himself worked up again. “I didn’t mean to…”

The silence returned again. 

A minute passed.

The once towering figure shrank down, resting his forehead against your arm while he looked down, trying to calm himself down. Desperate to ensure that you felt safe, despite his earlier behavior, he moved his hands away from yours entirely. They balled up into fists as he placed them into his lap. 

From his position on the ground, his voice returned again to that same breathless whisper. 

“I...”

It took some time, but the clown finally finished what he wanted to say to you.

“…I’ll always love you. Never forget that.”

Letting his dramatic confession hang in the air for a second, your posture still remained rigidly fixed towards the empty street ahead.

Neither of you moved.

Above, the streetlight continued to buzz off and on again.

“...Tell me then.” You whispered, your flat, monotone voice cutting straight through the sincerity of his words. 

He paused.

The light above you blinked once.

“If your ‘love’ for me is as true as you claim for it to be…”

Twice.

And then…

Hehe

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